Bani’s Justice- the Process, not the Outc - Page 2

Originally posted by: majumdar

The leap is around the corner, mid December it seems. Bani will come to know about the ONS and JW being the papa of Pia's kid. (I don't think JW has done anything or that he is the papa of canine's litter.) But for quite some time, Bani would be believing JW to be guilty of adultery and incest. So what should Bani's treatment of JW be? To begin with, my advise wouldn't be binding on Bani nor am I too concerned about what punishment she dishes out to JW. So what am I interested in. That she answers a few questions before she makes up her mind.

• Should she really believe in the ONS or should she wait for some more evidence, a DNA test for instance? After all, JW was too drunk to remember what happened that night and Pia could well be lying to lay her hand on her jeeju. And remember there is a past history- JW's evidence on the PR raaz was fatally flawed as he was himself not aware of the full facts of the case. So should she make up her mind on JW's statement or Pia's testimony or Jigs recording alone?

If she had heard it from the horse's mouth what is there to doubt. If Jai says he doesnt remember anything if Jai has a doubt then Bani may have ground to doubt the ONS took place. Pia is going to insist it did. Bani thinks her sister wouldn't lie to her as she is unaware of Pia's long term plan of displacing her. Pia is going to say nothing happened between her and Pushkar and he passed out. She says she has only slept with Jai. Her child is the proof. Even Jai has accepted that Pia's child is his on her word. Just like PR raaz, blame was absolved only with the confession of KD, here too the onus lies on Pia. If PR was an accident, would ONS be also an accident?

• Should she give JW a fair hearing or is his crime so big that she just needs to dish out a summary sentence without hearing his version/explanation?

The shock we go into upon hearing such confessions throws logic out of the window. Bani needs to come to terms with the fact that Jai slept with some one else, the broken trust and the fall from the pedestal she had placed him on. She needs to assimilate all this. Even if Jai was talking and explaining at that point she wouldn't be listening. The rage inside of her and the hurt would be multiplying, her mind would be closed to external inputs. In this highly volatile state, she will not think sensibly but rashly. We must always remember it is a triple whammy to her. One from her husband and the other her sister,for whom she has sacrified herself and the third her own inadequacy for not being able to bear a child, . She needs to go through these emotions first, she needs to grief for the betrayal before she can give him a chance to explain and listen to his reason and perhaps even question herself as to what went wrong that caused this situation to arise. Self examination comes later. Pity on oneself comes first.

• If she believes that JW is guilty, what punishment would be fair for JW, a temporary separation, a divorce-life long separation?

Would you believe the first natural reaction on hearing such news is to end the marriage. That is why one shouldn't act on impulse. Its only with time after coming to terms with the hurt that you start thinking rationally and ask yourself what do you want? Some time apart is good, gives you space to think away from the things that serve as a constant reminder. Whether in the end they divorce or not depends also on what Jai wants, is he willing to give up the child for bani or not. he can't expect to have both. He has to be firm , bani or the child. She will be looking at him for love because she feels she has been abandoned, he has to nurture her then they can stay together. It can only happens if he drops the child business.

• Does she think that her own conduct as a wife has been responsible for JW's behaviour and should be used to excuse him or lightening his sentence?

After grieving, she will that, or least I am hoping. I never approved of her Banigiri acts. She is responsible for breaking him emotionally.

• Does she believe that the shoddy treatment meted out to him by her family (ND, Kiran, Pia, Pushky) be treated as extenuating factors? The fact that she left him during the PR raaz which led to the chain of events which culminated in the ONS/the guilt that JW had to carry needlessly for 7 years be set off against her intended punishment for JW? And should the love that he has had towards her be viewed as a redeeming factor?

The love he has for her would be the only pillar. Without that love, what is there to hang on to?

• Or rather that his guilt is compounded by his other misdeeds- ill-treating Bani and Rano in the initial days of the marriage, his persecution of P-P which was partly responsible for the breakdown of his marriage, his constant secrecy from her on matters like PR raaz, ONS, Barnali etc. And that mere separation is not punishment enough for his crimes?

Initially only all the memories of how he has hurt her will come back to memory. The good times and other deep thinking issues come later, much later when we are trying to move forward from the betrayal.

• If she does leave him, should she stay within striking distance so that in case JW is found to be innocent they can be back together? Or should she go so far that he can't trace her back.?

She needs time and space. Why would she think he is innocent? Back to question 1. Where? I don't know, perhaps somewhere where she is comfortable.

• And how would she react if at some point of time it is proved that JW was innocent. Would she consider herself guilty for mistrusting JW? Should she apologise to him and what punishment if any (apart from her own conscience of course) would she consider justified for herself in case JW is acquitted?

I feel both would have paid the price for Pia's lie. Mistrust would only arise if Jai says he is not sure he participated in the ONS or not. She didn't believe him and tooks Pia's word only. There is nothing to apologize for. Both have suffered enough.

I do not wish to dictate any of her answers, it will be sufficient for me if she ponders over these questions and then arrives at her final judgement. In short I am interested more in the integrity of the Process by which she arrives at her conclusion not so much in the Outcome of her thinking.

Rgds,

Priyanka

PS: Of course, if JW prefers Pia and her puppy to Bani or expects Bani to accept the child then she should walk out on her marriage without any second thoughts.

Originally posted by: majumdar

The leap is around the corner, mid December it seems. Bani will come to know about the ONS and JW being the papa of Pia's kid. (I don't think JW has done anything or that he is the papa of canine's litter.) But for quite some time, Bani would be believing JW to be guilty of adultery and incest. So what should Bani's treatment of JW be? To begin with, my advise wouldn't be binding on Bani nor am I too concerned about what punishment she dishes out to JW. So what am I interested in. That she answers a few questions before she makes up her mind.

Should she really believe in the ONS or should she wait for some more evidence, a DNA test for instance? After all, JW was too drunk to remember what happened that night and Pia could well be lying to lay her hand on her jeeju. And remember there is a past history- JW's evidence on the PR raaz was fatally flawed as he was himself not aware of the full facts of the case. So should she make up her mind on JW's statement or Pia's testimony or Jigs recording alone? Pri, this is Bani we are talking about...If Jai admits that he slept with Pia and if Pea-brain tells her that she is indeed carrying JW's child, Bani will take it at face value and walk out of JW's life, before he can even blink his eyelids! But unlike the PR Raaz, Bani will walkout because she loves Jai too much to see him in a dilemma and not because she will be angry or upset with him for betraying their marriage! Bani is under a severe guilt trip for not able to beget a child for Jai and she will be only too happy that he would be able to become a Father, even if her own Marriage is ruined in the process! Should she give JW a fair hearing or is his crime so big that she just needs to dish out a summary sentence without hearing his version/explanation? Jai won't be able to explain anything to Bani, because he himself belives that he has committed a crime! Our Man is too much of a gentleman to tell Bani that it was Pia who took advantage of him, this is something he has not even told Pia, btw, hence there is no question of Bani giving JW a fair hearing, because she wont' ask for any explanations and JW won't have any to give her! If she believes that JW is guilty, what punishment would be fair for JW, a temporary separation, a divorce-life long separation?
• Bani will never punish Jai for anything now...The PR Raaz was the first and last of her punishments. Bani is now way too much in love with Jai and also under tremendous guilt for losing his child and putting him through so much of emotional harrassment. Bani will just walk away from his life, without asking or telling him anything and the walkout will be for the sake of Love, for the sake of JW's happiness, since he won't have to choose between her and the Child! Most prolly Bani will sign the Divorce Papers, hand them over to Tarun and leave WM!
Does she think that her own conduct as a wife has been responsible for JW's behaviour and should be used to excuse him or lightening his sentence?
• Frankly Pri, we are all responsible for our own actions and inactions. Circumstances and People might force us to act in a certain way, but there is something called 'Character' which determines the final course of action we take! As Prof. Dumbledore mentions in HP, 'It is our choices that determine the Life we make...' Hence, even though I feel very strongly, that Bani has failed innumerable times as a Wife, she still is not responsible for what happened between Jai and Pia in Dubai, that was only and only JW's moment of weakenss and falling of his character!

Does she believe that the shoddy treatment meted out to him by her family (ND, Kiran, Pia, Pushky) be treated as extenuating factors? The fact that she left him during the PR raaz which led to the chain of events which culminated in the ONS/the guilt that JW had to carry needlessly for 7 years be set off against her intended punishment for JW? And should the love that he has had towards her be viewed as a redeeming factor? Yes, Bani already feels that she and the rest of her family has been unfair towards Jai, especially Bani, because while the others might have broken his Heart, his Trust and his Life seperately, she did all the three in one go. This is the very fact that Bani will leave Jai to live his own life and not become a clog in the Wheel for him! Or rather that his guilt is compounded by his other misdeeds- ill-treating Bani and Rano in the initial days of the marriage, his persecution of P-P which was partly responsible for the breakdown of his marriage, his constant secrecy from her on matters like PR raaz, ONS, Barnali etc. And that mere separation is not punishment enough for his crimes? If she does leave him, should she stay within striking distance so that in case JW is found to be innocent they can be back together? Or should she go so far that he can't trace her back.?
• And how would she react if at some point of time it is proved that JW was innocent. Would she consider herself guilty for mistrusting JW? Should she apologise to him and what punishment if any (apart from her own conscience of course) would she consider justified for herself in case JW is acquitted?

I do not wish to dictate any of her answers, it will be sufficient for me if she ponders over these questions and then arrives at her final judgement. In short I am interested more in the integrity of the Process by which she arrives at her conclusion not so much in the Outcome of her thinking.

Rgds,

Priyanka

PS: Of course, if JW prefers Pia and her puppy to Bani or expects Bani to accept the child then she should walk out on her marriage without any second thoughts.

Pri, I have to go and finish my cooking before I pick up my kid from the School, hence will finish answering the rest of the Questions later!

Ciao,

MT

Originally posted by: mahimn

Priyanka,
For once I think that Bani will not blame Jai solely this time.I don't know the reason for my belief but my guess is she will place the blame equally on both Jai and Pia for the ONS mistake.Once the ONS is revealed she will be immensely hurt and distance herself from Jai but the final straw that will make her leave WM,will be Jigs recording of Jai confession to Pia that she was his first love and Pia's recorded voice message on Jai's cell phone.
The only reason I always wanted Jai to confess his love for Bani was because sometimes words can create far more better impact than gestures and it is highly needed in their case(and also create contrast to what he said to her at their farm house that his I love You means nothing).Even if they know what the other person feels they will choose to ignore it until it is verbally stated to them.There was never a doubt that Jai loved and adored Bani but she needs to be assured by Jai that he values her.

I think that more than the ONS issue it will be Jai confession that Pia was his first and true love,that will hurt her because she has virtually invested in this relationship beyond her means and will reap nothing out of it,not even her husband love(as per her).She will leave Jai so that he is not obligated to fulfill his duties as a husband.I don't think she will force him to marry Pia either.
I think she will leave Jai and WM assuming that Jai is better off without her,which ofcourse will be her assumption as she will not bother to talk to him regarding this whole Fiasco and what went wrong in their relationship.

Mahimm i totally agree with all the facts u have given for bani to leave the WM as she will be more hurt after she will listen to that audio tape edited by jigs and the desparation she is seeing in the eyes of Jw for his child and she will not question Jw as she will be totally shattered mentally to ask anything.

swati