Laughs -- The Grasshopper

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Man

@Manzz

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Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

The Grasshopper

A grasshopper jumps into a bar and asks the barkeeper for a beer, he downs that and asks for another.

After downing that the barkeeper turns to the grasshopper and says, "Hey mate, we've got a drink named after you!"

The grasshopper replies, "What? Kevin!"

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

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Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Begging

After years of training, I finally managed to train my dog to beg.

He's been doing so well at it, last night he came home with $25.

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

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Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Ice Fishing

Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long ice fishing. 0ne has been having no luck at all, while the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice. The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secret is.

"Mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm," is the reply.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"Mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm," the successful fisherman repeats.

"I'm sorry, I still didn't understand you."

The man spits something into his hand and says very clearly, "You've got to keep your worms warm."

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

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Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Smart Lady
A lady walks into a bank in London and asks to see the Manager.

She says she's going to New York on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $6000. The Manager says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the lady gives him the keys to her new Ferrari.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

The Manager and staff all enjoy a good laugh at the lady for using a $200,000 Ferrari against a $6000 loan. An employee then parks the car in the bank's underground carpark.

Two weeks later the lady returns, repays the $6000 and interest of $17.89. The Manager says, "Miss, we are very happy to have your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a millionairess. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $6000?"

The lady replies, "Where else in London can I park my car for two weeks for only $17.89 and expect it to be there when I return?"

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

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Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

When the man in the street says: "If it ain't broke, don't fix it," the lawyer writes: "Insofar as manifestations of functional deficiencies are agreed by any and all concerned parties to be imperceivable, and are so stipulated, it is incumbent upon said heretofore mentioned parties to exercise the deferment of otherwise pertinent maintenance procedures."

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Man

@Manzz

Coolbie

+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

In the USA, everything that is not prohibited by law is permitted.

In Germany, everything that is not permitted by law is prohibited.

In Russia, everything is prohibited, even if permitted by law.

In France, everything is permitted, even if prohibited by law.

In Switzerland, everything that is not prohibited by law is obligatory.

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Laughs -- The Grasshopper

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