#1 JJ SS: Three steps above heaven CLOSED - Page 12

Originally posted by: savindi.db

superb dr..update asap..eagerly waiting

Originally posted by: paridhiloveu

Awesome chapter dear u really write wonderfullly

Both are falling for each other now and unknown to them both were being jealous .

Loved ur story dear btw what's your name? I think pari?

Originally posted by: geeta.M

Hey Namita..

Its Beautiful story dear..I read all the chappy in one go.

Pm Me on ur next update.

My dear Pari,

I gather that your real name is Namita, but I prefer your fairylike id!

Thank you for inviting me to read your charming FF. You are obviously having fun writing it, developing the characters as you please, and the net effect is very nice, especially the Friends kind of set up with your happy quartet (though I doubt if even liberal parents would allow their daughter to live in a house with boys who are not related to her).

You are clearly all set to do a pleasant and entertaining Mills and Boon kind of story. Which is well and good, though I must confess that at 60 plus, this sort of romantic stuff is no longer my cup of tea.

But what struck me about your writing was something quite different, It was the superb descriptive passages, like the two I am citing below (complete with a perfect illustration!). There is an effortless lyricism there - A calmness flew by with the wind- and a fluent richness of language - The lingering light was obliterated by the rapidly falling night. The once salmon and purple sky transformed into a vast expanse of jet-black that engulfed the sky. A canopy of luminous stars materialized amongst the ocean of blackness...The place was silvered and transformed by the light of the moon, which, at the full, hung like a great luminous pearl on the radiant breast of heaven - that made me sit up and take notice. It was totally unexpected, finding such lovely passages in an FF here (though I must confess that I read only a very few).

You are really very good when you do such passages. I would like you to hone this talent of yours, and extend it to the rest of your writing.

Coming to the rest of your writing, I wish your Jodha, without bridling when Jalal quizzes her about all actors having relationships, had countered that even friendship is a relationship, and in fact the most precious of all, and that for now, she was only into friendships. Of course this is just my point of view.

Take care, my dear, and think about what I have said above.My very best wishes for all your future efforts.

Shyamala Aunty

Never in his life he had seen such a magnificent view. The orange haze cast(ed) over the moving sea, reflecting off every wave. Half of a glowing, radiant light loomed on the water's horizon. He open the window . A warm sensation splashed on to his face from the beaming rays of the sun. A calmness flew by with the wind making his heart stop for a single second. The birds huddled with their loved ones knowing of the day's end.

...
The lingering light was obliterated by the rapidly falling night. The once salmon and purple sky transformed into a vast expanse of jet-black that engulfed it (the sky). A canopy of luminous stars materialized amongst the ocean of blackness. Some were dull, merely flickering into existence every now and then, but there was an adequate amount of shimmering stars to illuminate the dark. The place was silvered and transformed by the light of the moon, which, at the full, hung like a great luminous pearl on the radiant breast of heaven.The lake glistened, mirroring the dazzling assemblage of glittering stars and the luminescence from the restaurants and designer boutiques that lined the marina.

Originally posted by: sashashyam

My dear Pari,

I gather that your real name is Namita, but I prefer your fairylike id!

Thank you for inviting me to read your charming FF. You are obviously having fun writing it, developing the characters as you please, and the net effect is very nice, especially the Friends kind of set up with your happy quartet (though I doubt if even liberal parents would allow their daughter to live in a house with boys who are not related to her).

You are clearly all set to do a pleasant and entertaining Mills and Boon kind of story. Which is well and good, though I must confess that at 60 plus, this sort of romantic stuff is no longer my cup of tea.

But what struck me about your writing was something quite different, It was the superb descriptive passages, like the two I am citing below (complete with a perfect illustration!). There is an effortless lyricism there - A calmness flew by with the wind- and a fluent richness of language - The lingering light was obliterated by the rapidly falling night. The once salmon and purple sky transformed into a vast expanse of jet-black that engulfed the sky. A canopy of luminous stars materialized amongst the ocean of blackness...The place was silvered and transformed by the light of the moon, which, at the full, hung like a great luminous pearl on the radiant breast of heaven - that made me sit up and take notice. It was totally unexpected, finding such lovely passages in an FF here (though I must confess that I read only a very few).

You are really very good when you do such passages. I would like you to hone this talent of yours, and extend it to the rest of your writing.

Coming to the rest of your writing, I wish your Jodha, without bridling when Jalal quizzes her about all actors having relationships, had countered that even friendship is a relationship, and in fact the most precious of all, and that for now, she was only into friendships. Of course this is just my point of view.

Take care, my dear, and think about what I have said above.My very best wishes for all your future efforts.

Shyamala Aunty

Never in his life he had seen such a magnificent view. The orange haze cast(ed) over the moving sea, reflecting off every wave. Half of a glowing, radiant light loomed on the water's horizon. He open the window . A warm sensation splashed on to his face from the beaming rays of the sun. A calmness flew by with the wind making his heart stop for a single second. The birds huddled with their loved ones knowing of the day's end.

...
The lingering light was obliterated by the rapidly falling night. The once salmon and purple sky transformed into a vast expanse of jet-black that engulfed it (the sky). A canopy of luminous stars materialized amongst the ocean of blackness. Some were dull, merely flickering into existence every now and then, but there was an adequate amount of shimmering stars to illuminate the dark. The place was silvered and transformed by the light of the moon, which, at the full, hung like a great luminous pearl on the radiant breast of heaven.The lake glistened, mirroring the dazzling assemblage of glittering stars and the luminescence from the restaurants and designer boutiques that lined the marina.

Originally posted by: Mavaddat

update namita

Originally posted by: sonali96

Hmmm lovely updates dear

This story interests me alot...continue soon dear nd pm me when u update