16~NOT just a passionate affair~ 57 (2 parts) 18 oct-To new beginnings - Page 15

Created

Last reply

Replies

1.1k

Views

54.8k

Users

44

Likes

2.6k

Frequent Posters

..Anusha.. thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: divyavm

My original take that Lashy refuses I delete 😆

Writer-e-khaas, you have outdone yourself ... Amazing! I had tears sitting in the middle of the car

And my updated take ... and this chapter gets a take 10 (and you know I rarely get inspired to do that) so you know how much I love this chapter 😳

The chapter begins ... the shot gun fires (Chitti, thank you for this phrase ... it got me going too 😳) ...the race begins ...

1. Before the race ... Jalal surveys the surroundings ... the path ahead of him seems daunting, but the first step seems the most difficult to take for the time being, if only he knew what the path would be like

The awkward first conversations with the Singhs after that horrendous day, the processing of the air of despair among the Singh family, Mrs. Singh's ominous warning, and the stress to get the Doctor to agree to the path he wanted to go forward on to see his Jodha

2. The door opens ... the race begins ... and immediately a steep hill faces him before ... the daunting sight of seeing his girl ... but wait was this the race he had signed up for ... was this his girl?

Indeed it was ... though the steepness and pain was beyond what he had imagined ... she was beyond recognition ... a moment of doubt, could he go forwar?

3. Immediately it seems easier to turn back to the starting line ... the comfort zone ... the comfort of the past ... the spunky woman, the dainty sashay, the supermodel with the flirtatious wink, the girl who was "on top of the world"

For a while he could stare blankly ... but then he knew he had to move on ... he had crossed many a hurdle before ... while he had passed those hurdles, he had felt those had been difficult ... but now he faced the biggest hurdle of them all ... and hopefully the last.

4. And what a beautiful poem and lesson here for Jalal , with this verse 👏

"The final step was the toughest of hurdles to cross,

The final spell of patience the toughest of virtues to master."

That indeed guides the path of the race to come ...

5. The initial steps: Jalal learns and adapts as he goes along

All the training and research comes to mind ... the importance of having a low voice, having control over your emotions ...

... he grasps on every bit of oxygen he has ... every drop of optimism is too precious, "At least God has given something to work on"

And he marches away ... chapter after chapter ... the chapters seem to dry out and then the SMSes of memories takes him forward ... the SMSes do not suffice, then music comes to boost the path along

But alas, the spirit within him continues to tire ... he needs one boost

6. A small victory to keep him going ... a finger moves

But is this enough oxygen? The medical experts say no ... but he does not want to stop breathing ... there has to be some lifeline ...

And then in this desperation comes the lifeline... the idea to bring their happiest moment back to life ... the 23rd birthday and their even more beautiful dreams of celebrating their 63rd birthday together 😳...

But is it enough? No response ... the positive charge within him begins to die, like the battery of his cell phone (What a beautiful parallel here, writer-e-khaas ⭐️) ...

7. But at some point, he just cannot go on ... the sun is at its speak, the sweat of anguish pours out as tears ...

There is no way to move on and he falls down on his knees exhausted by his early sprint ... like a little child not knowing how to go forward

8. And that is when the quenching of thirst (in the form of garam chai) and sound advice keeps him going ...

A new ray of hope comes from unexpected quarters ... another "strong man" shows a sense of solidarity ... and puts his journey in new perspective ... after all they were trying hard for his "choti" but they had to take this as a marathon and not a sprint ... as he had just learned

9. And just as he nears the finish line ... he finally has a steady pace... one day after the next, one physiotherapy session after another, one tie after another, one rose bunch after the other ... what seems like the end looks to be a new beginning

10. And then suddenly he reaches the finish line ... marked by a disbelief, a forehead that finally reaches for rest on the steering wheel like a runner falling on the ground upon crossing the finish line... disbelief, celebrations, screams, and shouts come together all at once. Victory was finally arrived.

And all the moments before are of no consequence when he has reached victory ... as he go towards the trophy, the nerves still playing games with him ... but then the door handle opens ... and then the prized moment arrives ...

A smiling face. Two eyes that can see him, not only feel him. And a voice expressing her wish to celebrate her 63rd birthday with him only ... and that is the only reason she came back. The destination has arrived.

Oh wait, this is not destination ... and that is the most beautiful part. There will be more marathons, sprints, strolls, and walks as Jodha-Jalal journey towards celebrating their 63rd birthdays together ... I am guessing with pineapple hawla 😳

Do I have to say anymore writer-e-khaas? To me, this was not only about the race called NJAPA, not only a race that Jalal had to go through, but also about the race called life ...

A race where as we reach a finish line ... it is often the most daunting

A race that you think should be a straight line , but has its ups and downs

A race which we often treat as a sprint, when it actuality is a marathon

A race where we think we have reached destination, but this is only one destination of many

So much you have so beautifully conveyed in this chapter. I will be very honest- this week between my accident, work stress, home stress - my legs were physically and figuratively very tired ... I did not know how to boost myself - the show, the forum, a take 5, music-- nothing was really doing the trick ... but your chapter did ... it was that powerful in showing the beautiful journey which is life and energizing me to move forward. Hence, I was in tears in the middle of the car.

Love you writer-e-khaas 🤗

Hope you liked my take too ... I tried something different this time. 😳



aaah I must have mind read most of this already...but I still read it.


the importance of having a low voice, having control over your emotions ... yes, this is what we need too, whether lying just out of reach in a coma or frazzled with life. The constant undertone of strength that is worth more than anything else I can think of in a person. Jalal learned it? Acquired it? Trained y life for it? One of him makes life easier for everyone who knows him. ...my hero.


oh and #9 ...9. And just as he nears the finish line ... he finally has a steady pace... one day after the next, one physiotherapy session after another, one tie after another, one rose bunch after the other ... what seems like the end looks to be a new beginning

exactly exactly the steady pace of a marathon and the repetition, may have been the hardest thing Jalal has ever had to do in his young life.


Edited by ..Anusha.. - 10 years ago
divyavm thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

aaah I must have mind read most of this already...but I still read it.

Mind reading? Or do I wear my heart on my sleeve😆

the importance of having a low voice, having control over your emotions ... yes, this is what we need too, whether lying just out of reach in a coma or frazzled with life. The constant undertone of strength that is worth more than anything else I can think of in a person. Jalal learned it? Acquired it? Trained y life for it? One of him makes life easier for everyone who knows him. ...my hero.

Yes, it is beautiful ... he is my hero ❤️

divyavm thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: ..Anusha..



oh and #9 ...9. And just as he nears the finish line ... he finally has a steady pace... one day after the next, one physiotherapy session after another, one tie after another, one rose bunch after the other ... what seems like the end looks to be a new beginning

exactly exactly the steady pace of a marathon and the repetition, may have been the hardest thing Jalal has ever had to do in his young life.




You added this Chitti ... yes, you eventually get into a daily rhythm ... one step and a time ... with no sense of when the destination it is ..it is the simplest yet the most difficult
Suganya.S thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
hey lashy di 😊
I just wanted to convey that NJAPA is VOLCANO OF EMOTIONS !!!
In which I m able to SENSE lot of emotions that has been bottled up with everyone, not only with NJAPA CHARACTERS BUT TO ALL THE ONES WHO READ THIS STORY !!!

JUST LIKE VOLCANO ERUPTS with sudden change in the land region , like wise JO's COMA has evoked VOLCANO OF EMOTIONS BOTH IN JALAL'S N SINGHS FAMILY , ALONG WITH US !!!
THANKS FOR PENNING DOWN THIS EMOTIONS SO BEAUTIFULLY DI !!!
I WOULD like to list some of it in ma POV ...
1) GLOOM SURROUNDED : I could SENSE how SINGHS would have felt seeing their favourite LIFELESS , in that stage Vishal was the one who was first to greet jalal as he could relate HOW MUCH THIS BOYFRIEND'S STATE is in parallel to their state ... Then followed Mr.Singh who was gratified enough to jalal as he has saved his daughter's dignity n LIFE !!!
2) DESPERATION OF TWOSOME : THIS STUBBORN BOYFRIEND who was so desperate to see his jo atleast for minutes , didn't lose his wisdom in that desperate state too ... He wished for a chance that he can speak to her and retrieve her from this long sleep !!!
Now its the desperate MOTHER who knows really well of her ZIDDHI DAUGHTER shows her agony , wat if HER BOYFRIEND'S VOICE can bring some life into her , so that her LAADLI ll call her MAMMA AGAIN 👏 , this shows how the Singhs were in the last levels of desperation to see some life back into their laadli ...


3) A STARKING CONTRAST BETWEEN REALITY N PAST : UNLIKE JALAL , who clearly knows his Jo fully couldn't cope with the fact that his once vibrant GF would reduce to this level of pawn under the CONFINES OF DESTINY ... A parallel btw past n present CLEARLY INDICATES HIM that THIS WAS HIS FINAL STEP TO CROSS / FINAL SPELL OF PATIENCE TO MASTER ...
But poor one couldn't SENSE that this wasn't a final step but It's FIRST STEP TO THEIR NEW BEGINNINGS !!!

4) A SEED OF HOPE BEING SOWN : YET and a BIG YET , JALAL BEING JALAL , started his journey to master this virtue with doing wise research n preparing himself to run this RACE ... Initially with prayers of all he started running his RACE with intense research n patience , then by cheering himself eventhough she showed no signs of life , accepting that ATLEAST GOD HAS GIVEN ME STHG TO WORK ON ... he could again SENSE he had to be strong n reinstated with faith tht they have HAPPY MOMENTS YET TO LIVE in their LIFE !!!
JALAL starts with reading her favorite novels that she could see images of them n return to normal state ... But this confidence in him is peeled with days passing !!!!

5) WITH DAYS PASSING , REALISATION OCCURS : Though his hope was peeled layer by layer with passing days , this STUBBORN BOYFRIEND doesn't leave his effort 👏 , at a moment he realizes the truth that THIS IS HEALING PROCESS AND NOT A MAGIC !!!! He again tries reminding her their memories with SMSes ... Trying his luck with another step of revival of his Jo , but it doesn't work again so WONDERS how its meant to proceed further !!!

6) TEN DAYS POST , A GLIMPSE OF HAPPINESS : WHEN this adamant Boyfriend gets to know that his girl showed some sign of life , he rushed to celebrate Alas ! His hope was again crushed but still stood STRONG FOR HIS GIRL to get her out of this state !!! 👏 " STHG IS BETTER THAN NOTHING " , Again he tried becoming STRONGER as he remembered both his research and short of time to make his GIRL FINE ... SO ULTIMATELY REMEMBERED HER FAVOURITE-EST VIDEO N PLAYED IT , NOT ONCE BUT INNUMEROUS TIMES !!!

7) FINALLY HIS BARRIER BROKE DOWN : Seeing his GIRL's no state of improvement , this BOYFRIEND finally brokedown with tears which he was holding for a long time ... With this tears wen he has lost all his hope on everything even HIMSELF, HE FELT HIS LIFE DARK AND EMPTY ...

8) LAST STRAY OF HOPE : then came a light in name of bade bhaiya , who ensured his spirits differentiating A RACE N A MARATHON which obviously brought a brighter image of life in jalal , as to how STRONG MEN as to be for their BELOVED and lead their life too along with taking care of their BELOVED !!! OFCOURSE HE WAS A TORCHBEARER IN JALAL'S LIFE when it was in the time of blurring ...

9) A VIVID APPROACH TO HIS MARATHON : Now after 30 days post the op , he has collectively managed his life with its appointments , physio's , ammi n his OWN along with HIS GIRL , PROVING HIM A PERFECT STRONG MEN 👏 👏
HIS SPEECH with physio itself proved that he VALUES BOTH AS LUCKY watever downs they face in life no matter wat it is !!!

10) ECSTASY IN COMPLETING THE MARATHON : NOW HAPPENED THE EXPECTED IN MOST UNEXPECTED WAY !!! YES , JO HIS JO gained her consciousness , telling him the most beautiful n heartfelt words that he died to hear from her for past one month ... THAT SHE WANTED TO CELEBRATE HER 63RD BIRTHDAY TOO WITH HIM !!! Wat a POIGNANT N MEMORABLE RESTART FOR THEIR EPIC LOVE STORY/ JOURNEY AHEAD !!!. 👏 👏

Phew !!! I hope I have written atleast half of wat I had in mind ... I know di I am not the one to write something long and that too serious one , but ever since I read this chap NJAPA I was on rollercoaster ride of emotions combined with my real life incidents n I felt dumb on Sunday ... So couldn't unres on Sun and doing it now !!!
I would love to hear ur views lashy di ... And Wishing u a happy diwali week too 😊 😊

P.S I loved divi's wonderful take 10 , which I know is always rare 😆 , but lashy di my heartfelt thanks for giving this wonderful ff n I love u loads DI 😳 😳
P.P.S I myself didn't think that I too would be able to give take ten 😆 😆 , but divi I know couldn't match u in giving takes 👏
Edited by suguJA - 10 years ago
..Anusha.. thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: divyavm


aaah I must have mind read most of this already...but I still read it.

Mind reading? Or do I wear my heart on my sleeve😆

the importance of having a low voice, having control over your emotions ... yes, this is what we need too, whether lying just out of reach in a coma or frazzled with life. The constant undertone of strength that is worth more than anything else I can think of in a person. Jalal learned it? Acquired it? Trained y life for it? One of him makes life easier for everyone who knows him. ...my hero.

Yes, it is beautiful ... he is my hero ❤️


well you've started sprinkling hearts around so ... you tell me.


strong people wear their heart on their sleeve? I don't think so. They may not know how strong they've become though.
divyavm thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

well you've started sprinkling hearts around so ... you tell me.


strong people wear their heart on their sleeve? I don't think so. They may not know how strong they've become though.


Sprinkling hearts habit I got from you 😆 As I did the angry faces 😉

Oh people who know me tell me that it is very obvious from my face whether I am happy, sad, excited ... I am a very transparent person
Antara123 thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
Finally an update after a long time... It was so amazing and lovely... I cannot express it in words... In the end... to celebrate my 63rd birthday? WOW. Just WOW... I feel so happy... Amazing yaar lashy... Btw, sabko a BIG Hello! From Shaguni bai. Especially Sara!!!!! I missed all of you too... Kaise hain sab? Wait. let me make another comment.
Antara123 thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
Hi Banjaras! Too lazy to go to that Coffee House thread. I am presuming all of you would be here too... Sabko Namaste, Salaam, Sasriyakal! Varsh, sara, kal, pal, sana, justlovetv, lashy, tahni, neetz... Did I miss someone? OH. Dearest, Anu... Sabko... If I missed someone, I will make another post xD.
Antara123 thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
Anusha, new Banjaran here? Haven't seen you before sweetie... Welcome... Divya, hello... Hema, hi... Shayad maine sab ko yaad kar liya... Ab kya haal chaal hain? Varsh would be working today right?
..Anusha.. thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: najma123

Anusha, new Banjaran here? Haven't seen you before sweetie... Welcome... Divya, hello... Hema, hi... Shayad maine sab ko yaad kar liya... Ab kya haal chaal hain? Varsh would be working today right?


hi hi hi ... i'm not exactly new ... Varsha and i have our regular Banajaran fights. 😆 I'll have to catch her when she comes to do her epic review of Lashy's update.

Related Topics

Jodha Akbar Thumbnail

Posted by: Blacktulip

4 months ago

New akdha Vm : Kuch khaas hai

Finally, I got it out of my head after months.. hope you like it....

Expand ▼
Jodha Akbar Thumbnail

Posted by: Blacktulip

11 months ago

New akdha VM - Ae dil hai mushkil

It has been more than 8 years probably since I made one .. hope you like it....

Expand ▼
Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".