horizon. that shot of the woman who surrendered waking up the morning after... botched job, i agree. i wonder, is all this coyness to do with a tv channel trying to protect us from ourselves? women and sexuality seem to be anathema to some. i wrote a lot about this on crooner, even before farm house came along, and i was mighty thrilled with the character called khushi that finally she did the right thing. firstly, marriage is not a licence to have sex only, secondly, they were married as far as i was concerned.
in fact, the entire portrayal of women on indian tv is pretty sick, regressive, and does no good for anyone anywhere. no one works, no one wants to do anything but please their mothers in law. if they speak in english, they are bad. the woman is always saviour, higher, pedestal craving, and an object really... there to keeping parivaar and parampara alive...
she is never a person with her own desires, wants, needs, her individual self. while a man has
but this not showing a woman with sexual feelings, understanding them or feeling close to her femininity... it's sad, it's practically a sin. especially in a nation where this constant unreal treatment of sex, the repression, the deep seated and never admitted misogynism, and feudalism/patriarchy has taken such an ugly turn in our times... i can't even bring myself to read about the regular rapes anymore.
women, like men, like having sex. well most of them at least. it is part of being human, in our dna, biology. it is a perfectly normal thing. no need to turn her into a channel and a repressive culture's idea of achhi. if khushi can feel her dhak dhaks, she can feel everything else too. that doesn't make her buri, makes her real. that doesn't mean now all she'll want to do is jump into bed, it only means she can level with herself and be who she is. and enjoy every aspect of herself.
she didn't buy aloo that day, she had the most exciting experience of her life maybe, thrilling, inebriating, elevating... yeah sex between two lovers can be all that and more. funny part was, her first memory was of him rolling over to cover her body... then straight to achhi ladki smile and devi maiyya... er.
but after diwali... hmm that anger in her, that sizzle, possibly sparked by a terrible sexual tension she'd never felt before and didn't know what to do with... that one seemed sort of crazy but real to me. post farm house... ai ai yo.
Interesting chat, you guys!
viv04,
Fantastic, your comments on indi's "thesis"😛😆. No but seriously...your thoughts so very perceptive...getting undone..rushing to be in public..Khushi in touch with womanhood...a shared smile post ecstasy...and i came to conquer, you let me, i did. Wah!! Too exciting to read and connect with👏 And that image of the mating swans...artful heartful beauty!!
viv04 and Horizon,
Completely in sync with you on that shallow morning after expression post farmhouse...anti climax diya humari khushi kumari ne...left me confused, her casualness, whether it had or had not gone the whole way. Very sad, after so many months of build up, to feel so subzi mandi-ish after reaching crescendo with the one and only!!
The only redeeming things: the night had been sensuous despite all odds of tacky conservative tellydom getting in the way...and much much more, as Indi points out too, that they made love/had sex before the so called saath phera wala atoot bandhan! In that, the show stayed true to it's grain. And i salute that. Cos even in this day and age, with reality being meelon koson door from all our so-called "sanskaars", mainstream thought and expression in apna desh is still prickly and judgmental when it comes to the subject of sex.
As for Diwali...Horizon, humara sorry yaar... cos i love it to death, her referring to it as "abhi woh jo kuchh der pehle hua". It was so volatile, so transient, so nameless, their rishta...esp those days...when the show was so self-assuredly marching onwards to a truthful soulful tune. Felt delightful to me that she didn't even know what to call that moment flaming with desire...
Indi,
Fiery fab words there on the general outlook towards women and sexuality. I had a chat with a 20 year old taxi driver yesterday. Wanted to know what he felt about the recent bombay gangrape. The girl was drunk i hear, he said. Does he have a sister, i asked. Yes, older, said he, but it's different cos she's in the village. I gave him a talking to that he is unlikely to forget this lifetime...looked completely shell shocked by the end of it he did. What is it about us, i thought later, that makes them so damn shaky about themselves? What is this constant need to box us in categories on the basis of what we look like, eat, drink, wear, say, do...practically everything except breathe, though that's sometimes seen as a problem too. A young taxi driver one can deal with, and make see some sense, given his proclivity to modernity in these times...but for those bigger and more powerful...where to begin with them? Shock them, a part of me says, and they'll get used to it. But with all the "achcha" traits ingrained deep down in us, will we actually be able to pull that off?? So it is about us too..us and our conflicting inner selves. We need to take stalk of our feelings and desires, get rid of some of those in-built guilt processors...be as open as we can, and not give in to what society and popular culture will have us believe. That's where i'm making my start...apart from making small dents chatting here and there with uninitiated unsuspecting folk! Too simplistic, more evolved minds might think. But i'll do it my way cos i see no other.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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