I Am Longing For You - Kaisa Yeh Khumar Hai:pg85 - Page 27

As the family waits outside the room, grieving together, a nurse comes and informs them that Anjali has regained consciousness and they can see her. Nani ji takes everyone, "Let's go!" and enters the room apprehensively. As nani opens the door and looks at Anjali, laying in the hospital bed, looking peaceful, her eyes closed, Nani's heart goes out to her, "Anjali bitiya!" Nani rushes to Anjali, Mami, Dadi, Buaji, Khushi, NK, Payal and Aakash follow her in. Everyone is tearful as they look at Anjali's tranquil face.

Arnav traverses the corridor, with a heavy heart, welled up eyes, mellow face, and heart feet.. he slowly approaches the door. His face oozes the feeling of loss. As Arnav approaches the door, his vulnerable eyes find Anjali, surrounded by all the members of the family. He clenches his teeth to control his emotions, his face sharp, his jaw firm.. Arnav Singh Raizada tries to bear his pain all alone. Next moment his gaze changes into the one of Anjali's little brother, trying to cope with the reality of breaking the bad news to his beloved sister. Nani ji says softly, "Anjali bitiya!" as she puts a soothing hand over her head and her hair. Mami's heart goes out to her, "Anjali bitiya!" as everyone looks at Anjali with tearful eyes, she opens her eyes. "Bitiya.. dear, are you OK?" Mami asks through her tears. Nani ji and Mami help Anjali sit up in the bed. Arnav's heart goes out to her as he watches her from a distance. "Anjali bitiys'" Nani can just say this as her voice cracks.. and tears roll down. Anjali says, "I am alright!" She looks at their sad faces and says, "Don't worry so much about me!" Arnav's heart sinks as he hears her. "Why are you in a somber mood? I really am alright!" Anjali assures them. Everyone averts their gaze, unable to bring truth to their lips..Anjali looks at Khushi and says, "Khushi ji, please, tell everyone!" Arnav's eyes well up outside the door and Khushi feels lost for words inside... Anjali again looks at Nani ji who cries silent tears.. asks, "What's wrong? Will anyone bother telling me what's the matter?" Mami somehow manages to put words together as she continues to cry, looks intermittently at Nani ji and others, "Anjali bitiya'. Bitiya' the baby.." "Want baby?" Anjali interrupts.. Arnav's eyes full to the brim. His sigh stuck in his throat.. he looks at Anjali through the glass window with vulnerable eyes as Anjali looks around the bed and asks, "What?" Mami says, "Bitya.. the doctor said' baby'" and she bursts into tears unable to say anything further.. Khushi's tears start rolling down her face as she suppresses her sobs. Arnav controls his tears'

Anjali looks around the bed' everyone into tears' her heart starts getting the vibes of worst.. but she vehemently denies, "Nothing has happened to my baby!.. My little princess is absolutely fine!.. That doctor knows nothing!.. and.. there are many other hospitals in this city! We will go somewhere else! Everything will be alright.. Yes!" Arnav's heart wrenches as he watched his Di in an emotional turmoil' he closes his eyes and clenches his teeth unable bear this pain' Inside, Anjali hold Nani's hand and consoles her, "Nani, don't cry! My princess is absolutely fine!" Nani averts her gaze as her tears rush.. Arnav's tears roll down as he cries silently outside.. Anjali assures Nani, "Really!... Do you know that my princess has been waiting for me? ..Yes!.. Won't she call me "Ma"? " Anjali asks with a hopeful smile.. everyone lowers their gaze as their tears roll even faster.. Anjali tries to shake the feeling of bad omen and continues excitedly, "You know Nani, I cannot even wait any longer! There is so much to do with my princess!" Arnav's tears roll down his vulnerable face as he watches his Di in denial, " I have to make those tiny little clothes for her!... and knit the socks' and that sweater!. Nani, the sweater I made, when will that fit her?" Anjali asks as Mami and Dadi cry inconsolably. Arnav averts his gaze with deep pain as his tears roll down. Anjali continues with a smile and excitement, "Tell me, please! '. And pink suits on girls, right? " Nani and everyone else bursts into uncontrollable tears as Anjali says with lots of excitement and a broad smile, 'How beautiful will she look, Nani! Right, how beautiful!" Then she looks around and assures everyone, "Nothing has happened to my little doll! She is absolutely fine! Why don't you get it?" Anjali finally tries to shake off the feeling of worst' Khushi takes a step ahead and sits down, tears in her eyes, somber face.. she says, "Di!" Anjali tries, "No, Khushi ji, no!" her face changes as Khushi's eyes fill to the brim and she holds Anjali's face in her right hand with a comforting touch, "Di, try to understand!" Arnav's heart cries as he cries silent tears watching them.. Anjlai averts her gaze.. Khushi pleads in a heavy voice, "Di, look at me! Your.. princess' is not coming back!" Anjali looks at her and yells, "Stop this non sense, Khushi ji! Don't say such things, please!" Everyone, including Arnav looks at her outburst with sympathetic eyes' Unable to look at Anjali in such a state, Arnav turns his back towards her, stands with his back to the door, his face soaked in his tears, his suppressed sobs trying to escape his throat as he hears Anjali vehemently deny inside, " It's nothing like that! My princess is absolutely fine, nothing has happened to her! That doctor knows nothing!" Frustrated she looks around when her eyes catch the sight of Arnav standing outside with his back to the door.

Alone.. outside the door.. Arnav Singh Raizada clenches his teeth as his welled up eyes try to contain his tears.. he reaches for the door with a heavy heart, looks inside through the glass window on the door'as he watches Anjali cry in Khushi's embrace, images of Anjali's attempt to get rid of the baby saying that the baby would remind her of her father and that no one would like the baby.. images of how he himself assured her that he would always be there for her flash in front of his eyes.. he closes his eyes with deep sorrow as Khushi and Nani try to soothe and calm Anjali down. The pain of the sorrow engulfs Arnav so bad that he pulls his hand from the door back.. and turns away from the door..

Inside, Nani ji says, "Anjali bitiya, control yourself!" as Anjali cries her heart out. Nurse enters the room and requests that they all leave and allow Anjali to rest. Mami resists, "Hello Hi Bye Bye! Our child needs us and you say that we should leave? We won't go!" The nurse instructs again, "She needs to rest. Leave her alone, please." As Mami goes to say something Nani says softly, "Manorama, let's go!" Everyone takes Nani's word and leaves the room. As the nurse gets Anjali settles back in the bed, Dadi says to Nani at the door, "Devyani, we still have time! I feel that we should call him!" Nani looks at Dadi with disbelief.. she cannot believe her ears..

Outside, Arnav and Khushi listen to what the doctor has to say, "We will have to keep her here tonight under observation. She has suffered huge blood loss.." other members from the family join them as they come outside. "She has suffered mental trauma! She is a state of shock!" the doctor adds. Mami asks with aggravation, "Doctor, our dear Anjali in such a bad state and that nurse asked us to leave!" Doctor answers, "Listen, she is in a delicate state right now. She needs to control herself. If you meet with her, it will be more difficult for her' So, please.. try to understand!" and he leaves. "I will stay behind alone!" Arnav declares. Dadi declares, "I will stay here!" Arnav turns to Aakash and says in a soft suggestive voice, "Aakash!" Aakash assures him, "Bhai, I will handle it!" He turns to NK, "NK Bhai, you take Khushi and Buaji home.." Khushi interrupts, looks Arnav into eye and says, "I will stay right here!" Arnav just looks at her, says nothing. Aakash leaves with Payal, Buaji, NK, then Nani and Mami. Khushi, Arnav and Dadi stay behind. Khushi and Dadi take care of Anjali as the nurse finishes her tasks. Dadi watches Khushi gently comfort Anjali as she goes to bed, says nothing.

Outside, paces Arnav Singh Raizada.. Restless' in the .lounging area, in front of the small temple in the hospital.. his mind and heart crowd with memories and images from the past.. when Anjali told him excitedly that he was going to be an uncle! 'images from that very afternoon when Anjali's God Bharayi took place' images from just a while before.. when she vehemently denied before accepting that her baby was no more.. from her outburst once it sank in' bothered.. frustrated.. deep in pain and sorrow.. Arnav Singh Raizada helplessly drops on the sofa. As he seats there with his head down, his eyes welled up, his heart heavy.. Khushi walks in. Her heart goes out to him. As Arnav silently laments, Khushi sits down next to him' she silently watches him'. And Arnav opens up.. in an emotional, heavy voice she pours his heart out.. tears trickle down intermittently.., " I had promised Di.. that .. I would always protect her!.. I would never let her suffer! But.. did you see? I could not do anything!" He clenches his teeth and says with anger and frustration, "Bloody Failure!". Khushi lends a listening ear.. Arnav continues as his tears find a way out, "I tried, Khushi! .. a lot.. I tried a lot! I failed every single time! Shyam kept cheating on my Di and I could do nothing!" Arnav's emotions peak as his frustration peaks, "Today. Di is in such a state and I.." Khushi's eyes well up as she watches him suffer. She holds him to comfort on his shoulder, "Arnav ji, you.." Arnav interrupts her in a sorrowful voice, "No, Khushi! This is the truth!"

Arnav's wounded heart pours his deep seated sorrow in front of Khushi, "That night also I could do nothing' when that mishap took place with Di and I!" Arnav's heart dives deep into the nightmarish memories of 'that' night.. when Anjali was getting married.. Young boy Arnav climbs up stairs after his mother.. Arnav's mother says to his father, as Arnav peeks through the door, "How did you deceive me big time? You did not even think once.. even once about our marriage? ' did not even think about our kids?" Arnav's father reaches out to her, "Listen Ratna, it's not like that. Please, listen to me.." Arnav's mother pushes his hand off her shoulder and screams, "I don't want to understand anything! I have seen you myself with her.." "With who?" asks Arnav's father.. his mother screams, "You never really loved me ever.." as she walsk away his father calls, "Ratna.." but next thing heard is a gunshot followed by his father's scream, "Ratna.." and then Arnav's scream, "Ma'." Tears from Arnav's eyes trickle down as he tells Khushi Khushi, " He had an extramarital affair with someone!" Khushi's eyes go wide with shock.. Arnav continues, "When my mother found out, she could not take it!.. When my mother killed herself.. my Dad committed suicide as well holding himself responsible for her death. I came to know about it much later that she also came to see my Dad for the last time. I never saw her face. All I know is that she and my Dad together killed my mother!" Khuhsi cries with Arnav.. moves closer to him.. hold his arm to comfort him.. as Arnav Singh Raizada continues to pour his heart out, "That night.. everything got messed up, Khushi! .. everything,!.. I was young but.. I showed courage.. thought that Di needed me! .and I told Di that everything will be alright! I will make everything alright! You will be happy! ' " He chokes as he opens his heart further, "..But here I am!" he clenches his teeth in frustration as he says, 'I failed, dammit!... Di, got married and..that.."