Posted:
Originally posted by: sea.nymph
@Tants: I'm already in love with your update... the title is perfect, the few paras that you have written are making me wait impatiently for you to complete your analysis!!!The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't being said.
An episode that has opened new learnings, new relationships, developments, new characteristics and new outlooks. The center point of all this was 'Communication' - both said and unsaid.
A relationship needs a good dose of healthy conversation at regular intervals. Communication is extremely important to maintain a relationship - be it mother-daughter, father-son, brother-sister, friends, lovers... Even the best of soul-mates who float on the same wave length need to communicate their thoughts with one another to ensure there is clarity, and awareness of each others feelings in matters. Appropriate Communication is an important aspect in a relationship as it helps provide a medium to stay on the same page as the other, it provides an insight into the others thoughts and feelings, it gives a chance to discuss matters and helps build a relationship.
Today we see, communication peeking its head in the relationships between Arnav-Khushi, Arnav-Garima-Buaji-Shashiji.
Till now, Khushi and Arnav haven't had a decent conversation after marriage. Either they were arguing fiercely, or sabotaging each others lives, or being a plain nuisance to one another. But, today we see the two of them expressing how they feel about the situations that prick them the most.
Arnav admits that he is the 'Daamad of Gupta Household' when he purchases the month's (or year's) food ration for them. Khushi, on an overdrive of emotion, requests Aranv to call Garima as 'Amma', something that Arnav is unable to do as the pain of losing his mother is still as fresh it was as it was years back. Evidently, his mother meant a lot for him to harbour the loss for so many years - or is it because of the lack of a caring, loving, warm mother figure in his life that makes him hold this memory so close to his heart?
UNSAID COMMUNICATION: Arnav feels guilty for the Gupta's running out of money due to paying his restaurant bill, and who now are unable to pay for the rations. His actions show that he considers himself a part of their family. Hid ease and openness with them show that he has discovered a comfortable spot for himself here. His cute attempt at humor with Buaji "Toh kya hua buaji, main khaata bhi toh bahot hun, aur aap khilati bhi toh bahot hain!" drives the aspect of familiarity formed between him and the Gupta household. Shashiji enjoying the joke too was a good touch - Arnav is adored by all the members here.
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Khushi oblivious to the hurt she's causing him, repeatedly asks him to address Garima as Amma, when Arnav blasts at her and storms off into the room. Khushi realizes that she has touched a raw nerve and immediately approaches him to apologize for her carelessness in bringing up the topic of 'Ma'. And here we have a much needed clear communication between the two.
Arnav tells her that she doesn't know the amount of hurt she has caused him, and that she wouldn't even understand it. In his anger, when his dimaagh shuts down completely, he spouts out that he hates living in her ghatiya house... but he regrets the words the instant he says them. This is again 'classic ASR reverse technique'. He doesn't mean more than half the things that he says in anger. A marked improvement in this area is that he realizes much faster now that he doesn't mean what he says in a rage.
Khushi taken aback by this outburst clarifies in a bout of tears that this is the way people of her level live. They learn to adjust with the circumstances, they plan their budget for every little thing, and make do with what they have quite happily. Besides this, she teaches him about respecting families, honoring relationships, and maintaining the family bonds even in the face of extreme hurt, pain, frustration and anger.
Arnav is humbled by her talk. Khushi is sensitized now toward what hurts him the most.
UNSAID COMMUNICATION: Khushi and Arnav have, over the months, come to realize when they are in the wrong, and when the other needs to be attended to when hurt. They are still learning about each others boundaries, the limits, the extent to which they can push the other or make up to each other. What is worth noticing is that both immediately set about to rectify any known mistakes that they commit unintentionally. Both can't see the other hurt, both work toward clearing up the mess they create, both strive to make it up to the other.
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Khushi overcome with tears rushes out of the room even as Arnav tries to stop her. She goes out with Shashiji while Buaji and Garima are busy preparing food for Arnav. Arnav's request to them in the morning to cook normal food and not healthy bland food is taken into consideration as they worry about whether he will like their normal food or not. They soon find that he isn't in his room and boil their heads with worry a bit more, until Arnav arrives with a food package that contains eehrrm ehhhrmm - Khushi's favourite - Gol Gappe!
But before that, he says sorry, not once but twice to Garima and Buaji for losing his temper in the morning. Buaji and Garima soothe him saying that it's alright, that he can Garima by whichever name he likes, after all a name doesn't change the relationship they share.
Khushi enters at this point with Shashiji and squeals in excitement on seeing the gol gappe. She immediately sets herself to task and opens the packet to gulp some down when she is stumped on hearing that Arnav bought them. She sits down grumpily, un-willing to take a bite of it since it was Arnav who bought them. Two of the seven deadly sins are busy at tug of war: Pride and Gluttony. Pride at first makes her sit back sullenly and watch Buaji and Garima relishing the gol gappe. The foodie that she is she gazes at the gol gappe longingly and mutters 'thoda khatta, thoda meetha, thoda teekha...' Primarily ruled by gluttony, Khushi throws Pride right out of her mind and indulges in satisfying her gluttony call. Arnav sits there all the while, calmly sipping his tea (another first in the history of this man's nature) and watches as his wife dilly-dallies about eating his apology. When she does dig into it, he gives an amused-she's-gone-mad expression, mixed with amusement-amazement-and-lovement 😉 at this crazy child-woman!
UNSAID COMMUNICATION: Arnav, the man who since all these months needed a bit of rehearsals before saying 'Sorry' to anyone, who said sorry with distinct unease and self-consciousness, now says it so naturally with genuine feeling that it is simply amazing to note the transformation in this area.
The comfortable bond between the Gupta household and Arnav is growing steadily. There is mutual respect, fondness, and compatibility between them. Arnav, who in his own house seems slightly cut of from the RM members, is one of the integral members here at GH. The warmth and cordiality extended to him here has seeped so gently into him that being ASR, he still does things without reporting it to anyone until the work is done, but he is also taking the likes/dislikes of the family members into consideration.
Arnav, after realizing that he has been harsh with Khushi, and wrong in his actions makes amends to apologize for his behaviour by bringing one of her favourite dishes. I love the way this guy's method of apology worked - he vocalizes his apology to the ladies of GH, but acts out his apology by means of the gol gappe to Khushi. He definitely knows that Khushi won't really be in a mood to listen to what he has to say - and if his comfort is 'plants' then Khushi's comfort is 'food'. 😆 Just thinking about these two adorable-mad kids brings a grin to my face.
Khushi at first refuses to be part of the pro-Arnav movement happening at her home, her pride halts her from giving in so easily to the Shaitan. But, like I've said before, this girl can't hold a grudge for long (even if she does she takes it out by the way of pranks). She likes the small joy's of life, the tiny moments of happiness, the little bit of 'special' in the day - and she doesn't let the dark clouds dampen her spirit for too long.
This is exactly the girl Arnav feel in love with in the beginning. If yesterday it was Khushi falling yet in love again with the man who showed his thoughtful side toward her family, then today Arnav again fell in love with the girl who enjoyed and made merry with the small things in life.
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POINTS TO BE NOTED (Since I've written a lot already, will just put down a few important points)
1. Khushi during the communication with Arnav says a very important line - that she will never hurt his family members even by mistake. (Arnav should have caught on to this, but well in the heat of the moment it slipped by - another hint lost, hope it is revived for the MU)
2. Garima-Buaji and Arnav bonding: I am beginning to love the trio scenes more than the Khushi-Arnav scenes. There is a touch of genuineness, humility, understanding and comfort between them that sets up a whole new level of chemistry altogether!
3. During Khushi-Arnav communication, there is a family photograph right behind Arnav, and his head is clearly in line with it, and is positioned right next to Khushi's face in the photo. (Will soon be a part of the family forever - after the MU and repentance?)
4. Bubbly's evident jealousy toward Payal. Refuses to see Payal as part of the Raizada family.
5. Thoda khatta, thoda meetha, thoda teekha: Fits perfectly for "Arnav's nature", and "Their relationship so far".
Absolutely loved the episode!! I hope there are a lot more bonding scenes between GH household and Arnav, though with the spoilers saying that he will tell Khushi that he is aware about her and Shyam, makes me wonder what's in store.
🤗 to everyone! Enjoy...
-- Nia 😊
The Unsaid Communication spoke quite effectively , Nia.. Relished reading it 😊
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
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