The sil-batta process: Now, that the 'sil-battta' has become notoriously famous, for a change I would like to use the analogy in a good way. When one grinds mixture of spices together on sil-batta each having different texture and toughness, the easy ones get ground first whereas its takes more time and more efforts to grind the tough ones. When one sees the spice mixture towards end, one would only see the tough to grind spices intact whereas others would have vanished becoming the fine mixture. That does not mean those spices never existed in the first place.
Similarly, the many hurdles that exist/existed between Virat-Sai coming together are and will be vanishing as the time passes without us coming to aknowledge that they existed very strongly at the begining.
When Virat missed Sai consciously for the first time (He already had felt 'disconnected' with her but did not realise it then) after she shifting to Usha Mavashi's room, Virat had said, "Sai ke bina ye room muzhe ajeeb kyun lag raha hai?","Mei bar bar Saike bare mei soch kyun raha hun?"
There was a disbelief/surprise first, that his heart is missing Sai, who he himself had said was only his 'farz' or 'zimmedari' with no emotional involvement.
Then he got a flashback of him peeking at Sai through the Sihghad fort indicating his feeble attraction towards her. Again there was a disbelief. 'how could he feel like that towards a girl, he himself was calling 'chhoti', 'bachhi' all along?'. If he agrees to himself that Sai has not remained his 'farz' anymore and he is getting attracted towards her, he has to come face to face with his 'Vadaa', 'Pakhi' 'deal' and 'bachhi' issues. Virat took the easy way out by denying it at the time by saying "Nahi..aisa kuchh nahi hai. Soye use jaha sona hai".
However, since then we see one 'hurdle spice' getting ground on sil-batta of their time spent together with neither of them ready to aknowledge it to avoid facing the tough questions.
Virat is using 'bachhi', 'chhoti' words less and less to refer to Sai. They are making the relationship less and less formal(" 'Mera pati hai'bolati ho aur 'chhuti ho gayi' bhi bolati ho") doing away with 'deal' gradually. Virat gave new definition to his zimmedari,"Parivaar ka matlabhi zimmedari hota hai" allowing himself to get emotionaly involved with Sai, without romantic hue to it (not breaking my Vadaa yet, neither the 'deal'). Sai accepted the new definition happily, showing her accetance of more informal, close relationship. Towards the end, very few issues will remain to be tackled by both.
I was just wondering what will keep bothering Sai for her to not accept her love for Virat or Virat's romantic move towards her? Sai is a very simple girl, not complexly mature like Virat. The issues that bother her are mostly created by Virat, and are few but strong.
Sai, the sensitive:
• Pakhi: Sai is a very sensitive and selfless woman. She already had felt guilty that she became the reason, for another woman's heart break. She said during her marriage ritual,"Fikr jarur hoti hai usaki jisase apane ye vada kiya hai.Use is shadise kitana dukh pauhacha hoga.. Mei chali jaungi..tabhi.."
That time I had thought that Sai would maintain distance from Virat for sake this other woman she ended up hurting inadvertantly. Sai demonstrated such behaviour after marriage
(a)In the car: Sai was the first to get conscious about Pakhi's feelings when Virat protected her during the car bump.
(b)Before reception: she tried convincing Pakhi, that it is a 'deal' marriage.
But as Pakhi started revealing her true colors, this inclination of Sai's died down. Toh 'Pakhi sensitivity spice' got crushed even before sil-batta came into the picture. Still Sai remained sensitive towards Pakhi, wanting her to hold her self-esteem high as a woman first but then after sil- batta episode, Sai wants her to atleast uphold her humanness.
• Virat: Eventhough Virat did not tell her directly about Pakhi, Sai inferred from their conversation about his feelings towards Pakhi.
After marriage, as Virat-Sai started spending time together, Sai did perceive the changing emotions of Virat towards her. But Virat's see-saw between his 'best friend' and Sai kept Sai confused all the time.
After overhearing Virat's conversation with Sunny after Pakhi leaving Chavhan Niwas, Sai misinterpreted that Virat misses Pakhi too and Pakhi being more than friend to him still.
Sai, the sensitive, visited Pakhi's 'mayaka', for Virat's sake. When Sai realised that it is Virat's sensitivity towards her that makes Pakhi insecure ("Ye 'deal' wali shadi ki baat tum apane Virat sirko sunana, kyonki vo tumhe aur pyar karen")
After coming home she had almost decided to leave the room. She also told Virat, "Aap meri chinta chhodiye. Pakhididiki sochiye." and indirectly asked him to watch for his sensitivity towards her which is making Pakhi insecure. "Lekin aisi kayi batein hai jo apane khul kar nahi mani.Apake aas pas ke log use mehsus kar sakate hai"(She meant 'Do not worry much about me' as it makes your best friend insecure) on whose departure, you became sad.
It will be Virat, who will need to stop even slightest of see-saw of feelings between Sai and Pakhi(out of even leftover feelings), for Sai to start believing in his feelings towards her.
Additionally, Virat's oscillation between 'Zimmedari' and 'mei tumhe khush dekhana chahata hun' will have to stop for Sai to start opening up her heart towards him.
Sai, the belief holder: Sai has a tendancy to hold onto a belief or conclusion she has made, beyond it's expiry date irrespective of the evidances that are in front of her. After everyone including Kale kaka told her that Virat was not responsible for Aaba's death, still she had said, "Aabake mautke jimmedar Virat sirhi hai". It took Virat to go through all the painful struggles to be by Sai's side to earn a comment from Sai,"Aaba apane unaki achhai dekhkarhi unhe meri jimmedari saupi hogi na!".
As I have already mentioned in the other post that Sai is a very percetive woman. She can sense the changes that are happening in Virat's feelings for her. At the same time, his words "mai tumhara pati nahi ban paunga" have made strong impact on her. For her to change her belief about Virat's heart not belonging to anyone else but her, Virat will have to display a continuous, rock solid inclination towards her, first accepting completely to himself that he wants to be'pati' of Sai.
Even today Virat said,"Pata nahi kyun, tumhara sapana pura honeke safar mein mei tumhare sath rehna chahata hun.." Abhi Viratkohi pata nahi hoga to Sai kaise samazh payegi?
Virat already has made one glitch with his 'Pakhi-pyar- dosti' tongue slip, pushing exuberant, affectionate Sai into her safe cave.
Sai is and going to come out of the shell with his caring gestures. But one more (even inadvertant) glitch especially at the advanced stage of their relationship may cost him a lot.
Sai, the 'Vadaa' girl: We always refer to Virat, as the 'Vadaa boy' but Sai is the true 'Vadaa' girl. Woh vadaa karati bhi aur nibhatibhi hai.Chahe use kitanabhi dukh pohoche. After Sai's visit to Pakhi's house, when virat asked her why she visited Pakhi, Sai replied "kyunki maine apase vadaa kiya tha". Even during the 'sil-batta' episode Sai said, "Mei apane vadese pichhe hatanevalomese nahi hun".
Now, this girl has promised Virat that she will not come between him and his promise of not allowing any woman to have place in his heart. She is the promise keeper.
Sai se sidhi sidhi baat: Virat had said, "muze ye gol gol batein samaz mei nahi ati". Viratko sidhi sidhi baat samaz mei nahi aati, lekin Sai ko sidhi sidhi aur sachhi sachhi baat hi achhi lagati hai.
• Sai liked that Virat told her about his past and T& C about their 'deal' marriage.
• Sai expects same clarity everytime. She is pushing Virat to communicate what his developing feelings for her are and clear the ambiguity between his words and action. "Apako kyun khushi ho rahi hai. Mei apaki lagati hi kya hun?".
• As it was Virat, who had put the T& C of their 'deal' marriage, Sai expects him to clear the air first. "Ye toh apako decide karana hai ke mei apaka parivaar hun ke jimmedari?"
• If Virat keeps beating around the bush rather than expressing his feelings when they develop in 'sidhe sidhe, sachhe sachhe bol', to Sai, he is going to fail quite badly.
Sai, the promise keeper to overcome these hurdles, will need to get deeply convinced about the intensity of Virat's feelings towards her, which completely depends upon 'har pal 'ghum' hota Virat'.
For Sai to crush the hurdle spices of ' Vaddas' 'deal', 'zimmedari', which are gifts to her by Virat, Virat need to present her with 'sil- batta' of 'his conviction of true love for Sai'.
Sai Joshi is an expert who can make very spicy, tasty 'Sairat' masala for us to enjoy!
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