Hiii all its me SUHAANA AGAIN
Torturing you will my thoughts'.
MG: OS
LONGING FOR LOVE
They say you are lucky to be blessed with a girl….." goddess laxmi has came in your house…." And yes it was somewhere true….. girls and specially new born baby girls are taken with respect ..so much respect that sometimes this respect make you fall on your feet to ask for mercy …for forgiveness,…..
Girls or boys didn't matter just want the baby to be fine…I have heard this by many couples expecting their child …. A small smile always curved my petal lips just hearing the phrase still unaware of the fact that what my mother wanted……
I was small just seven years….. actually didn't even remember the age…… I wanted that toy…very badly it was like my day wouldn't have ended without it…. I cried …I cried a lot asking my parents to give me …..
First they refused …. I was thinking may be they will just buy me one and surprise me …..waiting…and waiting….
An endless wait that didn't came to an end……
Suddenly she came out of her thoughts ……. There she was sitting clad in the red lehenga…..all the bridal accessories….she didn't even acknowledge the girls giggling and teasing her…..for her..now there will be one more person who will she have to hate…….
She was the most beautiful and glowing bride..she heard one of her cousins made remark ….. her cousin….disha lightly kissed her forehead…. She was her elder sister….currently well settled….especially came all the way from australia just to attend her marriage….. she is her sweetest di….. her only relief from his loneliness….. she is her taiji's daughter….. loved her a lot…..
A smile played on her lips…. But died off the next second seeing those two ladies coming towards her….her mother…. Ananya handa nd masi….rachna malhotra….she hated them….not only this …she hate her father and her brother to the core…..
There have not been a single moment where she was not made feel low…. She was treated like a dirt…a mere shit…..
She hated the sight and turned her face away….controlling her anger…..she was having no doubt that the family they had selected would be no less them….alwyas treating her like a mere piece of garbage…..
Her mother tried to come towards her….she got up of a sudden……
No warmth …no love..or affection….. she is her mother …the lady who carried her in her womb for nine months….. still no affection….. but she is used to it now….
Mother: girls its time for jaimala …bring her down…..
Her mother instructed…..
She was supposed to curse her mother…. But in a way she was relieved that she won't have to see her face everyday….that voice which just makes her restless….. scolding for no means….. she hated everything…every single thing about her family members….
The only family she considered was her grandparents and her bade papa….. but due to this woman behaviour they were also separated…..
The girls got the bride down…..
She was looking like a beautiful enchantress…. His eyes were just fixed on her….it was an arranged marriage….. their families fixed everything…. Soon she was his….tagged with his name…. she was married…. She will be a mere slave now… seeing her husband..just the old wounds got green….. her childhood was destroyed…. This lady who was supposed to be her ma … destroyed a beautiful dream…..and now marrying her…she is taking another revenge from her just to tell her that it is your mistake that you were born as a girl…..
It was the time of bidaai….
Geet looked at her family…she cried..cried a lot hugging her daadi..her di…badi ma….they were the one who gave her the warmth the love when she was a child….. who carressed her wounds when her mother would beat her……
Geet just controlled her self before going to her parents….there was longing inher eyes… but her anger and that indifference of years came in front of her eyes which made her to move without even looking back………
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It was almost eight months….they were married…he was seeing her…she never say anything…just remain quite never question him anything…..just does her all duties…..
He was not able to understand her , what was she made off….she didn't even say anything …..it was whether they share anything…or he made love to her…she was extremely quite…like she has restricted herself from him…..like she was not ready to get him into her life….. for his surprise she never also talks about her
family..never he had seen her talking with her mother on phone for hours which he had imagined her to do….but no she doesnot…..
She doesn't demand nor ask anything….her submissive nature somewhere makes him falls for her…but still their relation lacks the important aspect that is love and trust……
He always wanted his wife to be his support ….. she was his support though but that strength still lacks……
It was like yesterday when he asked her for dinner …..
Maan: geet..it's been a month almost we were out……I was so busy in new projects that didn't got time for my wife…
He said encircling her waist with his arms…..
She looked directly into his eyes…..and said….
Geet: as you wish…….
Just her remark…she was just stiff in his arms like she didn't like being in his arms….
Maan was in his thoughts when he saw her lying peacefully on bed….. a small smile was there on her face…..he kissed her forehead…he didn't know what to do…..how to keep her happy…… today was the most blissful and cheerful day which has turned gloomy by her silence……
They were going to be parents ….. she was un concious with sedatives….. but still didn't know the news….. she had fainted two hours back and he came to know about their baby which she was nurturing….
Geet opened her eyes …and found him and family members around her…..she sat within a reflex when he holded her and asked her to take care….
Maan: careful geet…..
She was looking in his chocolate brown eyes….. her deep brown hazels boring that invisible pain of not being loved by her own parents….. he knew that she was very sensitive and fragile but still he was not able to read her….
Though she was his wife but lacks as a soul mate…..
Everyone congratulated her…her head was bent in shyness….
They were alone after sometime…..
She was still not looking at him..neither said a word….but he was longing to hear from her….. how does she felt….. is she happy……
She looked at his eyes…those hazels for the first time were having a feel of shyness… a blush …pink blush was on her cheeks…..
He asked her…..no..it was just a call….
Maan: geet….
His voice was caring….just having a loving feel in it…something snapped within her….. the warmth she felt after years made her come in his embrace…… but her next set of words made him worried….like she was not someone he knew….
Geet: will you love our baby or hate her…..
HATE….. how can he this feeling of hate within him for the little life which is his part too…. But he didn't missed that fear in her voice….
Maan: why are you saying so….how can I hate which is related to my love…..
It was the first time he confessed his love…..
She looked deep into his eyes…… like she got some courage
Geet: promise me you will never hate my girl….
Maan: geet what if it is a boy…he asked her just to divert her mind…..
Geet: it means you will treat our baby as a mere piece of dirt if she is a girl…..again coldness was there in those eyes
It was her insecurity her childhood experience was speaking……
Maan was stunned…. Anger surged through his veins….how can she say like this…. If he is responsible for bringing a new life in this words then he is responsible for her upbringing… and how can he treat his baby like this……
He asked her….
Maan: tell me what's wrong are you not happy being pregnant …. That you are talking like this……
Tears welled in her eyes….. started to pour out of her eyes……
Geet: please don't torture her and punish her for being a girl…..
He was melted seeing her tears….very gently taking her in his arms….he lifted her chin and asked her….
Maan: geet tell me what's wrong…did any one say anything to you….
She nodded in a NO…..
Maan: then..tell me…you know you can share your pain with me…trust me ….just speak your heart…..
His words felt heartfelt…..
She with so much fear ….told him about her life…..
Geet started sharing her pain….. with sobbing….
Geet: why I am an unwanted child…my ma cried when I was born…why she said that she wanted a boy…why she didn't saw my face….. why ..tell me…..
Maan was stunned …how can be a mother so cruel…..he was not understanding how to console her…..
Maan: shh….shona…. look I don't know why your mother did so…but I am so much proud of you …
Geet: you have they never loved me… I just craved for their love…… but no…and their hatred towards me increased when he was born….
Maan understood she was indicating towards her brother…..
Geet: I so much hate her…… I hated you too…she selected you for me…but why you are not like her…why your family loves me…..
Hate me….. I am used to it……
She was sobbing it was the outburst of twelve years…..
Unknowingly she confessed why she stays away from him…..
Maan: you know I can't hate you…… your mother or father doesn't selected me….. it was me you saw you at your college…… and approached your bade papa….
She looked at him unbelievingly ……
Maan: I was fallen for you when I saw you first time…… don't you dare to say that no one loves you…and I will hate our love…he said placing his hand o her abdomen…..
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His words soothened her…like she found her companian…..for the first time she snuggled close to him at night….
Now he knew why she was like that …………..
He consulted a doctor …and the light depression she was having …. He cured from his love….she slowy accepted him…still hated some parts from her life …but love to be now with him……..
Sometimes LOVE and CARE is all that is needed…..
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You can take me as insane as I again wrote this ……
Tell me how is it
My mom gave me this concept today
waiting for likes and comments
Mannat Har Khushi Paane Ki
Cricket
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