Obsession 2,new story link-pg 73

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516645

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Posted: 12 years ago

#331

Happy B'day (I hope it's not belated though)

Edited by Cloud9. - 12 years ago

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516645

Suspended

Posted: 12 years ago

#332

Res BTW read the story yesterday, a long comment is due
Edit:

First of all, I've read from part 15 in one sitting, and trust me when I say I haven't slept after that. That's another thing altogether that I slept on my books later in the afternoon the next day😆
Talk about digressing...
Anyway, back to the topic...
This story was handled so beautifully that I am speechless. I didn't unreserved my comment solely for one reason that I want it to sink into my brain totally. However, even after a day I can't get over the feel and I stopped trying.
Pari is a much liked character in this story of yours. She being the vulnerable character, and being the victim of something which is not in her hands, yet gone out of her means to save the one person she loved. When Maan came back driving, trust me my heart was thumping so loud, and when Geet found him in the washroom with a dead Pari, I closed my mouth with my palms and sat motionless for a while.
Another lovable character was Geet. I am glad that she is not an epitome of perfection like a typical protagonist. She has flaws and she's guts enough to accept them. She'd felt guilty for commenting on Pari's love, she'd guts enough to confess her love for him, and she's sensible for thinking from his side and letting go off the slap, accepting that she deserved it. And she has enough love in her for giving it endlessly to Putul.
It might be so hard to see a person you love so close yet so far to you. It might be a living hell for being there with him like a shadow yet not being there with him in real sense.
About Maan... He is another victim of the plays of fate. The feeling of losing your loved ones as soon as he expresses them was so deep rooted in him that he stopped himself from loving fully. I could imagine a little boy who'd seen his father die before him, and somewhere holding himself responsible for it. It is understandable for him to think of What ifs.
And it is as well understood that he wanted Geet to hate him. The scene where he was mean to her and made a demeaning statement and when Geet replied why she loved Putul, his own helplessness for hurting her was heart touching.
Putul is such a cute name to begin with and she is indeed a cute baby. Frankly I have read many FFs and many of them had children, but sometimes I found the children part slightly overdone in many stories. In order to make them look cute, sometimes it would turn out to be OTT. But oh boy, this is a rare piece where I loved the baby girl as much as her parents loved her.
The last two chapters had me smiling with wet eyes. Is it because of the overwhelming emotions of the leads, is it because of the realism in the writing, the sweet and candid way of expressing without any overdone language and cheesy lines in confession, or is it because of the BG scores of ARR, I have no idea but well after reading this story, the first thing I'd done was download that Sapney piano instrumental and I've been listening to it ever since.
More to come, which I am saving for epilogue of course😆

Edited by Cloud9. - 12 years ago

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palindrome

@palindrome

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#333

Originally posted by: Cloud9.
Happy B'day (I hope it's not belated though)

Thank you so much...😊

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palindrome

@palindrome

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#334

Epilogue...

Maan felt a little awkward while searching for "lip balm" in different racks of dressing table.Number and variety of bottles as well as tubes present on geet's dressing table amazed him as his hands got busy in search.Even after spending whole ten minutes he was unable to find lip balm.He decided to call geet to help him while cursing the moment when he tried to remove that stuck staple pin from stapler with his teeth.While doing this,he got his lower lip slightly bruised..

"Dadda..you also looking for mumma's red lipstick???" Voice of his five year old daughter startled him as he turned around.The way putul was dressed brought a lovely smile on his face.She had wrapped geet's dupatta like a saree. Geet's stone bindi was placed perfectly between her eyebrows,increasing her cuteness however geet's bangles were over sized for her little arms as she was putting much effort to push them back so they did not come out from her arms."Tell me no..dadda!!!" Her piggy tails bounced as she spoke.

"No baby..I was looking for lip balm..dadda got his lip hurt.."maan said pouting his lower lip thus showing putul his bruise.

"Dadda..Its bleeding..!!!l" Little girl said in a panic mode.."Let me call mumma..she would help you..."

"No baby..Don't disturb mumma.."Maan stopped her knowing very well that geet was busy with some special case."If you want,you can help me to get lip balm..Do you know where does mumma keep it???"

"Yes dadda..Its in lower rack with lipsticks..."putul answered.Her knowledge did not surprise him as he was well aware of his daughter's fondness for make up cosmetics.Before maan could open the rack,putul herself came forward and opened it.Like an expert,her little hands roamed in the rack.."which one you want,daddy???orange or pink??"

"Are they colored??? let me check"maan scowled.

He carefully looked at tubes and came to know about their flavors.He himself tried to find one without any flavor but there was none in geet's collection.Applying a strawberry or orange flavored lip balm seemed quite girlish to him,thats why he dropped the idea.."I would apply glycerine instead of balm.He thought while licking the blood from his lip.Suddenly his gaze fell on a red colored box.."Whats there in this red box???" He said grabbing attention of putul who was quite busy in searching her favorite red lipstick.

"That is pari maa's box daddy.."Putul answered in an exciting tone.

Her answer increased maan's urge to open and look inside.He opened the box only to see pari's things kept carefully inside.There was a delicate diamond necklace with matching ear rings,a bracelet,a nose ring, and pari's favorite anklets.

" Are not they so beautiful and sparkly daaddy!!!Mumma said i can wear them when i will become a big girl..and when i will wear red saree like kavita aunty had wore on her wedding.."Putul's said gaining maan's attention.He felt a strange respect for geet witnessing how she had made a special place for "pari" in putul's heart. Putul had never met pari still pari was an important part of her life.It was the solely result of geet's upbringing.For an outsider,geet had taken pari's place in maan's life as well as house after marriage but in reality rather than replacing pari,geet had secured pari's place in their life.

"Mumma...!!!" putul screamed as she saw geet entering in the room.Very soon she broke in to run towards her mother.."Mumma..I will apply red lipstick today.." putul said hugging geet from her waist.

"Sure my baby. and mumma will help you..."

Soon mother-daughter duo was busy with their make up.Maan kept looking at his family with a smile on his lips and little moisture in his eyes..He was about to keep the box back at its place when his gaze fell on a piece of paper.It was his letter to geet the day he proposed her.He read the entire letter.Don't know why today he wanted to fill that dash between "I" and "you" but even after four years,he could not find the proper word for it.Even with time gone and knowing geet more and more,it had become more and more difficult for him.

He had no idea when a tear drop fell from his eye just at the "dash",making the paper little wet there.Knowing very well that it was impossible for him to fill that dash with a "word",he kissed at that place only to see little blood from his lip being blotted at dash. He knew his tear,his blood and his kiss were not enough to fill that dash but still little red spot at the paper gave a strange contentment to his heart. He properly folded the letter to keep it back in the rack.

"Maan..!!!!"Geet said walking towards him with panic stricken face.."Show me your lip..putul just told me that..."He did not let her finish as he pulled her for a soul searing kiss.It took little time for geet to respond to his sudden affection.They kissed till both felt the need of air to breath..

"geet!!!.."Maan said breathing heavily making her look in to his eyes.She could see the struggle in his eyes to express his emotions to her..

"I know maan you dash me alot..."She said hugging her love. Maan's wide arms welcomed her as he gave a soft peck on her head.

"Mumma...!!! dadda!!!!..Family hug!!!" Putul's sweet voice made them pull out from their hug..She was hugging both of them from their legs..

"Yes baby..Family hug..!!!"Maan said as he picked putul in his arms and cocooned his daughter and his wife in his strong embrace..

***************************************************************************************

Finally obsession has ended bringing a beautiful start for maaneet's life...

Today,I want to thank each and every reader who read,liked as well as dropped valuable comments for this story of mine.Its your comments and likes which made this journey more beautiful for me as a writer and Its impossible for me to tell you how much thankful i am for this..A mere "thank you" would not be enough to convey my feelings...Each and every comment in this thread, is not less than a reward for me..!!!

Always seeking your support..

palindrome..

***********************************************************************************

For enjoying more putul's cute antics,,please watch this video..Putul is like agnes completely except she has two piggy tails instead of one,,

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mm3UIfaQtTo[/YOUTUBE]

Edited by palindrome - 12 years ago

232

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Diva7

@Diva7

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

#335

woohhooo wat a cute putullicious epilogue😛

i luvd her cute antics "Dadda..you also looking for mumma's red lipstick???",..."which one you want,daddy???orange or pink??"😆

draping mommy's dupatta n all makeup luv, gosh kids frenzies fr all dis😆

how beautifully u portrayed it...Its amazinggg.

u cnt giv name to his feelings wat he feels fr her...can express it, bt cnt name it... lyk wind,u cnt see it but can feel it.

n i think these lines r depicting her feelings her luv fr him....

"Love is patient and kind, it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offense, nor is it resentful."

wat a fantastic story dear, luvd each n evry bit of it👏

THANK YOU n LUV U🤗

Edited by Diva7 - 12 years ago

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sdlife19

@sdlife19

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 12 years ago

#336

Beautiful update..

It was a perfect end to the story with the perfect family thx for such a lovely story

though i started reading much later i must say u are superb..

plzz dont stop writing here.. do continue and come with new fabulous stories..

will wait for your next FF

Edited by sdlife19 - 12 years ago

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kavitha05

@kavitha05

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#337

really nice end plz cum up with new story plz

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Remya

@Remya_Pillai

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#338

That was awesum..
Maan's feelings for geet can only b expressed... words don't give that feelings...

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gudmeet

@gudmeet

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#339

excellent part dear

what an end and what a beautiful beginning

wow dear maan's attempt to fill the dash was awesome

ur really amazing in writing such deep emotions

what a lovely story

and what a portrayal of love

be it pari's love for maan

maan's love for pari and dash for geet

geet's love for maan

and maan geet's love for putul

and ur readers dash for u our brilliant writer

u know u have invented a new so imp three words

I DASH YOU

thank u so so so very much for such amazing story

will miss u so much

write something again as soon as u come up with a new idea

will really wait for ur new story

thank you once again dear

and will miss ur updates very very much

my dash will always b there with u

god bless u dear

take care

lots and lots of love

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fatiya52110

@fatiya52110

Explorer

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#340

Hi !!! I am a silent reader of yur ff... But AS ITS COMING TO END THOUGHT TO DROP A COMMENT... Just like the title of the FF i was obsessed with the ff... It was a beautiful piece of writing.. It never occured me dat in this maan doesn't love geet coz the love she had fr Pari was undying... though i was a maaneet fan i wss nt J o angry dat Maan was irrevocably in love with Pari...
And i extremly loved the relationship Maan And Geet share.. As not every1 is having a fairytale... We do have the share of ups n down's in life n Geet was there fr Maan like an invisible n visible support who handel him in all situations with care
Your story truly depicts these lines meanings " IF U LUV SUMONE LET THEM GO IF ITS TRUE IT WIL COME BACK TO U" N geet waited n never forced Maan to love her just loved him Without expectations , which according to me is the best part of these story...
And about pari she wanted to fight with her obsession but even trying hard she could't fyt it it was truly depressong how sumthings r beyond the control of human power !!!!!

I hope am nt making u bored by my comment buhbyee cu soon with someother beautiful story!!!!
Thanx for giving such a beautiful piece of work... I kove mystery n psychological genre

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Obsession 2,new story link-pg 73 - Page 34

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