ArShi FF: Splintered Dreams ~Ch 04: Pg 80~ |04-May-2015| - Page 8

"Jeene Ke Liye Socha Hi Nahi, Dard Sambhalane Honge...

Tere Maasoon Sawaalon Se Pareshan Hoon Main... Pareshan Hoon Main..."

Khushi sat on the old wooden bench, with her head against the wooden pane of the window. She smiled wearily, all to herself, when she heard the song playing on the radio in Mohan Bhaiyya's Sweets Store, which was exactly opposite to her house. The tiny pedestal fan right next to the bench creaked as it kept rotating. The sound of pit-pat of the water leaking from the dilapidated roof into the red plastic bucket, kept increasing its pace. Khushi closed her eyes, as if trying to meditate on the meaning of the song. And the more she understood the words, the more she felt that it suited her best. "What is the meaning of my life?" she thought to herself as she fidgeted with the black-beaded nuptial chain round her neck. "I've been married for four long months, yet I have no identity as his wife in the society. And in spite of not having any feelings towards him, I have to keep this relationship alive. For how long will I have to keep this facade up?" She looked at the small crumpled piece of paper that she had stuffed inside her bag, a week earlier. "Pregnancy: Positive", was all that she read from her report. Ever since she was a young girl, she's always dreamt of being married to the Prince on the white horse, and to live happily in his castle as his Princess; after that, they would have a baby boy and a baby girl. Khushi felt a dull pain at how her dreams were shattered to pieces. She was supposed to feel elated and overjoyed at this good news; probably over the moon that she was going to bear his child. Yet she sensed nothing; she felt nothing. Nada. Nil. Zilch.

She looked at the dusty road from the small window of her room. "Khushi, I'm home" she heard a voice from the living room. She rose from the bench and walked out to see that her brother- Shyam Gupta was back. "Khushi, I bought sweets for you. The moment you told me that I'm going to be an uncle, I was so elated that I..." "Have you heard from him?" Khushi interrupted him with her question. Shyam heaved a sigh, "No Khushi. I haven't. He hasn't kept in touch with me ever since he left the city." Khushi gripped the edge of her dupatta and fidgeted with it, "How can he not keep in touch with you? You are his best friend! It's been three weeks and two days since he's gone missing; he hasn't even made a phone call nor written a letter. And you're not even doing anything to find him. Shyam, don't you wish your sister to be at peace, especially when I'm carrying his baby? Then why can't you search for him?" Shyam held her shoulders and made her sit on the rocking chair. "Khushi, I do wish for you to be happy. And I do wish for your husband to be back. But it seems as if that bloody double-cross has disappeared from the face of the earth. I've asked all of our business associates..." "Business Associates? You mean the drug dealers!" Khushi glared at him. "Yes, whatever." Shaym rolled his eyes at his sister's glare, "I've asked all of them about his whereabouts. No one's heard from him. The day he got the bag of cash from the heroin deal, he just vanished. I was supposed to get a share and that bas***d..." "Shyam please! The man you call bas***d is my husband; the father of the baby that is within me." Shyam threw his hands in his hair, "Fine. Keep defending him! But if you ask me, he isn't coming back. He ran away, after knocking you up and leaving you pregnant with his child. He ran away with my money. Son of a..." Shyam stormed out of the house after cursing his brother-in-law with a string of choicest curses.

Khushi rose from the chair and walked to the statue of her favourite deity. Joining her hands in prayer, she bowed her head and closed her eyes, "Devi Maiyya, you know that I've been true at heart. All I ever wanted was to live a life of dignity and earn my living by honest means, unlike my brother and my husband. Devi Maiyya, you know me through and through. You know that even if I never wanted to marry him, I did not go against my brother's word. Even if my brother is into drug dealing, I do not say a word against him because after you took my Amma-Bauji away, he was the only one who was there for me. So, as per your wish through Shyam, I married him, even if it was just for the sake of my brother. And even if I did not love him, I bore every single torture he inflicted on me, in the name of love and marriage. Even when he forced himself on me under the influence of alcohol, I did not say anything to anyone. Because I know that, being my husband, he has a right over my soul and my body. Amma used to say, It is the duty of a wife to keep her husband happy; and that a wife can die in peace only when she has surrendered herself at the feet of her husband. And now, even if I do not love him, I promise to fulfil my duties like is expected from a good wife. I cannot disappoint my Amma-Bauji, who are watching me from above. I only pray to you, Devi Maiyya, to bring my brother and my husband back on the right track. Give them your divine grace so that they fall out of bad company. I have always surrendered to your will and I believe that you never let anything bad happen to the ones who have faith in you; nor do you let anyone who come to you in hope, go empty-handed. Devi Maiyya, most of all, I beg from you to keep my baby safe. A child is supposed to be a gift from you. My baby is an innocent and a pure soul. Please do not punish my little one for the deeds of its father. Keep me and my child in your gracious care, now and always."

The phone rang, interrupting her conversation with Devi Maiyya. She bowed her head at the statue and turned around to attend the phone call. The minute she picked up, a gruff voice spoke on the other end, "Shyam Gupta?" Khushi shook her head, "Shyam Gupta isn't at home. May I know who is calling?" "I'm sub-inspector Gowtham Wagle, from Thane Police Station. Whom am I talking to?" Khushi swallowed hard, "I'm Shyam's sister speaking. Khushi Gupta" She heard a long moment of silence in the other end, after which the voice said, "You mean, Mrs. Khushi Raizada, right?" Khushi felt as is her heart had come up to her mouth, "Y... yes..." Khushi frowned as to how the sub-inspector knew of her marriage to him. They had gotten married in the temple, in presence of Shyam alone. She doubted even if his family knew that she was married to him. Then how did he know? "Mrs. Raizada?" the voice called out to her, pulling her out of her thoughts, "Yes Saheb?" she responded. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but, your husband, Mr. Raizada is no more. He was shot in an encounter during a raid. I called up because Shyam Gupta's number was saved as an emergency contact in Mr. Raizada's phone. I wanted to know when you can come to the station to claim the body and complete the remaining procedures." A lengthy silence was heard by the sub-inspector. "Hello?" he asked, yet heard no voice. "Mrs. Raizada? Are you okay?" Again there was no silence. Shrugging his shoulders, he cut the call.

Khushi placed the phone back on the receiver. She sat by the old wooden bench and stared out at the dusty road. She felt strange, as if she had no heart. She felt no love, no loss, no pain. Nor fear, nor joy, nor sorrow. She felt... hollow. Her hand crept up to her flat belly. The baby! What would she do? In the eyes of the society, she was still unmarried. And now, the father of the child was dead. What was she supposed to do? She tried to cry at the loss of her child's father; at the helplessness she felt. Yet she couldn't come to cry. She was just numb. Icy and numb, devoid of feeling anything. Suddenly every single noise around her seemed to have increased by a few decibels. She heard the raunchy item song playing on the radio. The old fisherman on the streets was ringing the bell on his bicycle and yelling out the prices for the catch of the day. Mohan Bhaiyya was screaming at one of his worker for burning a batch of boondi. The pit-pat sound was even more irritating than it used to be. Khushi looked around the room. "What am I supposed to do?" she questioned herself, yet found no answer.

Just then, Shyam came back into the room and saw Khushi seated at the corner of the room. Patting her back, he drew her attention. She looked at him blankly, with no expression on her face. "Look Khushi, I'm sorry I said all that. I know I shouldn't have called him a bas***d. He's not only my friend. He's your husband too. He is the father of your child. It was a little insensitive of me. Forgive me." Khushi did not even blink. She kept staring at him, as if he was talking in a foreign language. "Khushi? Are you okay?" Shyam shook her. She gave no reply. "Khushi? Say something!" he said in a louder tone. "He is dead" she said in a dry voice, totally unaffected, as if she was talking about the weather. "What? Who? What are you talking about?" Shyam did not believe what his sister just said. "He. Is. Dead... Killed in an encounter during a raid. Sub-Inspector called up... We've to claim the body at Thane Police Station" she mechanically repeated the sub-inspector's words to Shyam, like a parrot. Shyam began to sweat profusely. "Raizada is dead? How? I mean... Oh shit. I hope they did not find the money. The money could be traced back, and if the police were to find out about the heroin deal, I could go to jail too. Shit! Shit!" Khushi looked at Shyam with a frown. At times she doubted if he was truly blood-related to her. She had just lost her husband, and even if she did not love the man, she could use some sympathy at the loss of her unborn child's father. But all that Shyam ever cared for was money. However, she did not say a word to him, like all the other times. "Let's just go to the police station" she said, and Shyam nodded.

Shyam Gupta kept biting his nails all throughout the way, until they reached the police station in the rickshaw. By the time they reached, Khushi and Shyam saw a huge swarm of reporters and other media folks in front of the station, throwing questions at the Inspector. "Sir, is it true that Mr. Raizada was involved into drug rackets? Or is someone just trying to defame him?" "Sir, does the Raizada family know about the illegal activities that their son is involved with?" "Sir, do we have the names of the other people involved with Mr. Raizada? Surely it cannot be a one man army. When will you bring the other names to light?" "Are any politicians or other influential people involved in this racket? Why aren't the police answering us?" "Sir, we've heard that Mr. Raizada was involved with a woman, and now the police are hiding her to keep her safe. Is it true?" Khushi refused to take another step towards the main entrance of the station. Shyam wiped the sweat on his brow and held her hand to guide her to the station. They quietly stepped inside, while the journalists kept grilling the inspector for answers.

The moment Khushi entered the station, she searched for the name plate bearing Gowtham Wagle's name. Immediately, she spotted the name and walked to the six foot hefty giant who stood by the table with a file in his hand. "Sub-Inspector Wagle?" she said in a soft voice. "Yes?" he said without looking up from a file. "I'm here for the formalities. I'm Khushi Gupta...Uh Raizada..." The minute Wagle heard the name Raizada, he looked up to see the pale, petite woman in front of him. He looked at the man next to her. "Shyam Gupta?" "Yes Saheb" Shyam answered meekly. He gave the two of them a good look, and then asked them to follow him.

When Khushi entered the dark morgue, she saw two older women and an older man weeping bitterly near his body. She looked at the sub-inspector in confusion, "Who are they?" "You do not know them?" Khushi shook her head. Wagle frowned at her, "Strange that you do not know your own in-laws. They are your husband's parents and she is your husband's grandmother" he said pointing to the three of them. He looked at Khushi who said, "We were married in secrecy, in a temple." Wagle narrowed his eyes and looked at the Raizada family members saying, "This woman says she is your son's wife. And she is here to claim for the body"

Arvind and Ratna Raizada, along with Devyani Raizada looked at the meek girl in front of them. Before anything else was said, a voice behind them all said, "No one else is claiming the body, apart from the Raizada family" Khushi turned around to look at the man standing at a few feet. He wore a three-piece suit and a dark pair of sunshades covered his eyes. He took a step forward and took his glasses off, and that was when she saw the striking similarity between the man in front of her and him. Both of them had pale green eyes. Khushi stood rooted to the ground as the man walked past her. Wagle said to him, "But she says she is Mrs. Khushi Raizada and is married to..." "I don't care" the man said, "There may be many who would like to associate to him just because he bears the surname- Raizada. You cannot let any street-walker to come up to you and claim the body. For all I know, she could be one of those at the brothel. And just because she claims something, it doesn't mean to be true. As I've said already, no one claims the body, but us." Wagle was about to retort when he received a phone call and he had to excuse himself. After Wagle left, Khushi walked up to the man who stood looking at the body covered in white sheet. "How dare you call me a street-walker? A prostitute? I am his wife! And I have every right in the world to claim his mortal remains. Who the hell do you think you are? You think you could just storm in and stop me from fulfilling my last duties towards my husband? Just who are you?" Khushi almost yelled at him. The man raised his hand to stop her from talking, and she saw his jaw muscles bulging just before he opened his mouth to speak. "I am Arnav Singh Raizada" Pausing for a moment, he said pointing to the body, "And the man, who was shot dead, Arjun Singh Raizada, was my younger brother."