Part 17.1: In the City of DjinnsArnav looked amusedly at Khushi as she had her nose very firmly buried in a copy of William Dalrymple's City of Djinns. She had her very determined and earnest face on, as if she had every intention to go through the entire three hundred and thirty nine pages of it before they completed their hour and a half duration flight. The entire extended clan, basically every Gupta, every Raizada on this planet, both current and former were headed to Delhi.
Just a couple of hours into this two-day whirlwind trip and Arnav was exhausted. There was something very stressful about aunts, grandaunts and uncles; ever ready to offer a million opinions about life choices along with some very empathic discourse on the state of the nation.
"Why can't you live in India? You young people are all abandoning this great country, it is so tragic" his granduncle had strongly admonished him even while Arnav helped him through the security check and with his luggage that weighed suspiciously too much for a weekend trip. It was going to be a long two weeks until the wedding, when he would see the last of his extended family.
Khushi unlike him, he conceded with a tinge of envy, was able to handle the crazies with far more aplomb. Just before they boarded the plane, one of his aunts went and slapped Khushi on her back and said, "Khushi beta, why has Arnav lost so much weight? Once you marry him, please fatten him up a little. Also, give him a haircut." Arnav had snorted on his coffee when Khushi announced without batting an eyelid, "Uff ho, Tanuja Chachi, Raizada is in the movies now. He has to watch his waist. And if he cut his hair, he will lose even more weight." Tanuja Chachi had looked at her bemused, muttered something about the flight being announced and went to check the departure board.
"So you think I need to watch my waist?"
Khushi looked up from her book and an impish smile spread on her face, "Of course, Raizada. You are my pretty trophy husband after all."
"Eh?"
"Meenal Bua was earlier telling me, since I am the one with the "real job" in our relationship and you are going to be a stay at home husband, I had to be careful to ensure that I don't crush your fragile male ego."
"Haha. You mean writing is not a "real job"? I am crushed."
"You know when I joined advertising my family was disappointed that I didn't have a "real job", I am happy that my stock has improved now. I guess this is what they mean when they say something like blah blah married well."
"Happy to be useful."
Khushi squeezed his hand and blew him a kiss and went back to her book.
"You know there is not going to be a quiz on the City of Djinns at the end of this flight that you cram through it this way."
"Are you suffering from writer-envy because I picked Dalrymple over you?"
"Writers are supportive of other writers actually. We are always happy when people read, given how rare that species is becoming."
"How poignant and adorable at the same time."
And with that Khushi went back to her book. Arnav had long suspected that Khushi suffered from a mild case of OCD, but he had to conclude now that it was not exactly mild. No, his fiance was not going to give him any attention. He sighed and picked up the glossy airline magazine and tried to muster up some enthusiasm for the poorly researched and superficially written fluff travel pieces.
"Excuse me, are you Arnav Raizada?"
Startled, he looked up from the magazine and noticed that a pretty girl was sitting on the aisle seat.
"Yes, I am. Sorry, I don't seem to recognize you."
"That is because you have not seen my photograph in the inside jacket of a bestselling novel."
After which she giggled self-consciously.
"By the way, my name is Indrani, Indu for short. Big fan of your work."
"Thank you, Indu.. Indrani. What do you do?"
"I am actually a fashion designer. I work with organic fabric and..."
"I need to pee."
Arnav turned towards Khushi, sitting at the window-seat, Dalrymple now abandoned and a very stern expression on her face. He had to withhold his smile and looked apologetically at Indrani, as he gestured her to get up. The two of them got up and let Khushi go. They continued chatting until Khushi returned, after which Indrani excused herself to go to the lavatory.
"At the airport you were regaling about how you had the best bladder control on this planet and hence always took the window seat. What about that?"
"What is with the Spanish Inquisition, Raizada?"
"Hardly an inquisition, you know. Just curiosity."
"Okay fine. I don't like your fangirls. They will preen and steal your stuff, while you will defend them."
"Still not forgiven me over the Sunaina incident, have you?"
"Still not apologized to me about the Sunaina incident, have you?"
"Touche."
"Raizada, that still does not sound like a sorry. You are KabirKhurana-ing me."
"Groan. Now the dude is verb? Let me guess, Kabir gave Niharika a ton of grief and never apologised. But once he pushed Nikarika at the end of the tether, he was full of regret and tried his damn best to woo her with sad songs playing in the background as sand dunes magically appeared in Bombay."
"I knew it. You are from the Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat featuring Kameeni and Vijay fandom. We Ka-Ka-ians loathe you guys. We call your fandom the Kameen-ays."
"Wow. It is almost like a parallel universe of fandoms out there."
"True that. By the way, why is Indu taking so long to pee? Do you think she will blow up the plane or something?"
"You need to stop watching rubbish TV shows. Maybe you will be less prone to drama."
"Snob. But even if Indu blows up the plane. I have taken care of one important thing."
"Which is?"
"You know how I told everyone that the reason why the family is on three different airlines is because there were not enough low cost seats, yes?"
"Mmm.. hmmm."
"Actually that wasn't the reason. I mean, sure, we did save some money. But the reason why I booked us on three different airlines is because I didn't want all the Raizadas and Guptas to get wiped out should our plane crash."
"You are delightful, aren't you?"
"Yes. Daadi and I drew up an excel sheet so as to determine who goes in which aircraft. As you may have noticed, we split all the couples. So Akash Jeeju is on Indigo, but Payaloo is flying Jet. That way, each mini family would have at least one survivor."
"Seriously?"
"C'mon, it is good practice. My company has a corporate policy in place that if more than three employees have to travel then we split them across two airlines. That way even if one plane crashes, somebody shows up to work the next day."
"What if both the planes crash?"
"Now you are just being silly, Raizada."
"I see. All hail Capitalism."
"Please, don't diss Capitalism. It is a beautiful thing, okay?"
"Okay. So why did your system fail to take into account that the two of us ought to have been separated too? Do I dare harbour the hope that you want us to remain united in life and in death?"
"Only the Kameen-ays would say something that cheesy."
Just then Indu returned to the seat, in time as the flight began to makes it descent.
Khushi put the City of Djinns into her bag, which Arnav thought concernedly seemed huge enough to stash away a few bodies.
"Why is your bag so big?"
"I like big bags and I cannot lie, okay?"
"Is that a euphemism?"
"I don't even know what that word means."
Arnav noticed that Khushi looked nervous. He could tell by the way she was playing with her hair. She always did that when she was in the middle of one of her novel schemes that usually had a hundred percent chance of failing.
"Is something bothering you?"
"Yes. I mean, no. Nothing is bothering me. Landings make me nervous, okay?"
"Are you sure? If something is bothering you, please tell me."
"Nothing is bothering me, Raizada."
"Fine. Delhi is beautiful, isn't it?" he said as the plane swerved and they got a glimpse of the sprawling metropolis.
"It is okay, I guess. But I am a Bombay girl. I feel obliged to hate Delhi."
"I am a Delhi boy. I don't hate Bombay."
"You are a better person than I am, Raizada."
The aircraft landed rather smoothly for a Government owned airline. Khushi and he got outside the cramped space and away from the jostling crowds, where they waited for other members of the clan who were all arriving on different airlines roughly around the same time. Khushi sat cross-legged near one of those overpriced coffee counters looking forlorn.
"Do you want some coffee?"
"Depends. Whose kidney should we sell? Yours or mine?"
"Eh?"
"Look at the prices, Raizada. One small Cappuccino is three hundred and fifty rupees. That too after they misspell it as capucheeno."
"Grammar police, are we?"
"I like to think of it as fine taste. That is all."
"Fine. Can I buy you coffee? Something to eat, perhaps?"
"No, thanks. I am good."
"You are saying no to food? Khushi, tum theekh ho? You look upset."
"Raizada stop asking me that again and again. You are freaking me out. Oh look, Payaloo is here."
Arnav turned around and watched as one half of the carefully divided Raizadas and Guptas made their way towards the exit gates. Khushi, he observed with a shake of head, ran towards and hugged her sister. Hadn't they just met a hour and a half back at the Bombay airport? After crushing her sister, Khushi went up and hugged every member of the clan, like all of them had returned from a war or something. She sure was a compulsive hugger. As he followed the Gupta girls towards the baggage carousel, he listened with some amusement.
"Khushi, look at all the girls here. They are all so pretty, no?"
"I know, Payaloo. I hate this city."
***
Khushi sat by the hotel window of the magnificent Taj Mahal Hotel. Her second round of 5-star hospitality within a month, this time thanks to her generous fiance. She had one of the fancy deluxe suites complete in retro-style all to herself, causing her Daadi to announce enviously, "My room does not have a fireplace."
Of course, the fireplace was entirely ornamental and if anybody were to attempt to light a match inside her room the the sprinklers and assorted alarms would go off and she would probably be banned as a guest across every Taj property ever.
Khushi put away her copy of the City of Djinns, which she was almost done with now and reflected back on the events of the last few weeks. The Delhi visit happened after a random conversation with her to-be sister-in-law Anjali over a cup of coffee.
"Bhabhi, how do you feel about a quick trip to Delhi?"
"Umm. Why not, Di? After the wedding, perhaps?"
"No, I meant right now. Before the wedding. You know to pay obeisance at the Mai Sahiba Dargah."
Now Khushi had an idea that Anjali was the one among the Raizadas for whom her faith was extremely important. The Raizada boys were reluctant believers and Khushi suspected that they celebrated festivals and observed rituals only out of extreme reverence to their sister. Also, fear. Anjali was formidable and Khushi knew that it would be of little use to try and convince her to-be sister-in-law that the trip be put off until after the wedding. When Khushi had nodded, Anjali had enveloped her into a big hug at the coffee shop while people at the other tables looked at them curiously.
Over the next few days, it became clear why this trip to Delhi and the Dargah in particular was important. The religious meaning itself was incidental, the Dargah represented blessings from Arnav's mothers. Yes, plural. Ratna Raizada who had raised her brother's son and Anuja Mallik the woman who gave birth to him. While Arnav seldom spoke about these two women, she learnt from Daadaji that Anuja Mallik and her husband Rajeev Mallik who were driving from Lucknow to Delhi to visit the Dargah, met with an accident en route and died on the spot, even before help could reach them. Not one to shy away from uncomfortable questions, Khushi had asked Daadaji why did he go Cinderella's step-mom on Arnav initially. Daadaji had laughed at the name he had been given and did not think of it as an undeserved one. He ruefully admitted that he had indeed felt some resistance at the beginning because he was old-fashioned in some ways. But over the years as he saw that his daughter-in-law and son never once discriminated between Arnav and their biological children, he felt remorse for not having had a bigger heart. When his son and daughter-in-law too tragically passed away, it was Daadaji who took the still very young children under his fold and raised them to be good adults. Over the years, he watched with great pride, Arnav morph into a wonderful young man - erudite, proud, loving and dependable; all qualities that he appreciated in young people. Arnav did not begrudge his Daadaji for the early days and the pair shared a lovely bond now - full of gruff love of course, without a hint of sentimentality.
"I will always be ashamed of how I was with Arnav. I was a fool. But now I am wiser. Trying to be at any rate."
Khushi had immediately hugged Daadaji and felt her shoulders become wet with his tears. Of course, he pushed her away and said sternly, "If you hug me again without my permission, I will make sure this wedding is called off."
"Rubbish," Khushi had said, "Just like your grandson, bark worse than the bite."
The trip to the Mai Sahiba Dargah in that sense was an important one to complete. To give a sense of completion to that one journey which tragically ended over fifteen years ago. Yes, this trip to Delhi was not just a whimsical idea of Anjali, it was one that was important for Khushi and Arnav. It was necessary to face up to the demons of the past. For closure. And of course, for new beginnings.
BeepSorry, Khushi that your very first evening in the city and I have abandoned you. I promise to make it up to you.
It is okay, Raizada. Even I would choose to hangout with my hot guy friends over my fiance if given a chance. So, I understand.
Shut up. These are my friends from school and they wanted to do a guys night out.
Aka daaru, yes?
Yes.
I thought your friends were kurta wearing, designer stubble possessing, Commie dudes? Please don't disappoint me by saying that your friends are chikna, Punjabi boys who drive SUVs with shady, tinted glasses blasting Honey Singh Yo Yo?
How much you stereotype, Khushi? But yes, my friends are the kurta wearing anti-establishment dudes. Which is why we drink only desi daaru at cheap places.
I approve, Comrade.
How is it possible for you to love capitalism and simultaneously approve of communists?
Because I contain multitudes, okay?
Okay. Which is the reason why I love you so.
Quit being cheesy, Raizada.
Fine. What are you going to do now?
Go troll the Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat forum.
Don't do it, Khushi.
Haffun, Raizada.
***
Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat to travel to Australia
Fans of the the popular soap Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat featuring Abhay Singh Kapoor and Tarana Khurana can rejoice as the show will now travel to Sydney and Melbourne. The top ranked show on Ringo TV which tells the unique love-hate story of Vijay Singhania and Kameeni Mehra, popularly known as Vi-Ka just saw the completion of two-month long wedding festivities of the characters after a lot of trials and tribulations. Our source says that the show will now travel on an extended one-month long schedule to Australia, for the honeymoon of the characters. And fans can expect a lot of romance, including a sensuous rain sequence. We also learn that Abhay Singh Kapoor's real-life partner Simran Singh Kapoor nee Raj will also accompany her husband.
What the hell? Kameen-ays get honeymoon and rain romance. That too in a First World country. We Ka-Ka-ians didn't even get filmcity walla Khandala. Whatever. Kameen-ays suck.
**
Post Title: Team Ka-Ka vs Team Kameen-aysJab Tak Rahega Instagram mein cupcakes in every colour,
Tab Tak Team Ka-Ka will kick Team Kameen-ays posterior.
Jab Tak Rahega Khushi ke saath just thoda sa Gham,
Tab Tak Team Ka-Ka will kick Team Kameen-ays fat bum.
1543 Likes
<this topic is closed by the moderators for godawful rhyming>
***
BeepHey Champ, when are you guys back in Bombay. I have some news.
Back day after. What is the news? Don't tell me you are getting hitched.
Okay, I won't then.
What? Lavanya Kashyap has committed? Will wonders never cease.
Look who is talking, Arnav Determined-Bachelor Raizada.
It has been a good year, yes? Congratulations, Lizoo. Who is the poor guy?
His name is Rana Duggal. Mummy found him through the trusted kaam walli bai network. Meenaben and Sheenaben are the shizz.
Seriously? You are settling for an arranged marriage suitor? Why?
Don't judge me, Champ. Not all of us get lucky like you. And who knows, maybe he is the one.
I am sorry. But I want what is best for you, okay? Because you are awesome.
Aww. You are drunk, aren't you?
Just a little.
Pfft!
***
BeepBhabhi, how goes? Am I interrupting your quality time with my bhaiya?
Bhaiya is out drinking with yaar dost log. Bhabhi is raiding the extensive mini bar to bill aforementioned Bhaiya.
Do you want to go out somewhere?
At this time? In this dangerous city?
Rubbish! It is going to be eight. Not so late. Where is your sense of adventure?
Okay. Ooh let us go to the citadel of Feroz Shah Kotla. We might meet a Djinn.
What? What is a Djinn?
Nandu, you don't know what Djinns are? They are invisible spirits that haunt this city. They love Delhi and jalebis.
Sound like the lovechild of Arnav and Khushi.
I know, right? So awesome! See you in ten.
Are you sure A-dawg will be okay with this?
Of course. He is not a chauvinist pig like Vijay Singhania.
Haha. But Kameeni is kind of sexier than Niharika. Just saying.
Take that back. Or I will feed you to the Djinns.
Wait. Do Djinns eat humans. Can we just go out and have dinner at some nice and quiet place instead.
Rubbish. Where is your sense of adventure? See you in ten.
***
Arnav wasn't sure if he was really drunk or did Khushi really text him saying, "Hey, off to meet the Djinns and find out why they love this city so much. Don't wait for me <3"
Also what the f**k was lesser than three?
Wait. Did he just see Abhi jeeju leave with a woman? Couldn't be Di, could it?
BeepDi, are you and jeeju settled in your room? Sorry that I had to leave to meet friends and couldn't check on you.
I am fine, Arnav. Where is Khushi? She and Nandu left a couple of hours ago and are not yet back. Your jeeju is also out with his guy friends. Since I can't drink, I stayed back. Please check on Khushi. Getting worried, we need to leave early tomorrow morning to go to the Dargah.
Maybe, this desi daaru was a bad idea.
***
Edited by TabassumR - 11 years ago
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