Complicated Arhi FF|Thread II Part38Pg138 - Page 55

He was passing through the corridor when hearing a cry he halted in his track. Automatically his feet lifted and start moving to the room. Before opening the door he hesitantly looked around if someone was seeing him but not finding anyone, he opened the door and entered in

He moved to her cot and delicately take her in his arms, caressing her back and soothing her

"Sshh … Sshh …. Don't cry …. You are not alone …." He slightly cradle her in his arms as to turning her face to him when her crying stopped

He smiled seeing her cute little face and he lightly stroked her cheeks

"You're angelic …. You know" He grinned as she smiled, as if she has heard his complement

"Pari" He whispered and bowing he kissed her tiny forehead

As soon he heard some footsteps approaching, he instantly put her back in the cot and hide himself behind the curtains, he helplessly stared at her who was once again weeping on top of her lungs, he just want to go and grab her in his arms as he did earlier but in this way he has to accept his defeat, because if someone have seen him with her like this, it will be his defeat because he was the one who strongly refused to acknowledge her as a part of his family and Arnav Singh Raizada had never accepted defeat

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He was furious at himself, how could he feel for that girl who has taken away his place in the family, he hated how everyone in the house was giving importance to her and they were ignoring him.

"I called her Pari …. Damn it ….. Pari my foot … she is …." He wants to use something harsh for her but nothing came out and that day he realized that like every other member of the house he was also attracting to that little girl but he will not show it to anyone, not even himself, he promised to himself

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After that till two years he used to play with her when no one was around, he felt good whenever he spend time with her but in front of his family he always behaved as if he did not care about her,

He was just 10 years old but his ego was like some mature person. Sometimes he wished that he could tell it to everyone that he care for Khushi but every time his ego stopped him and with every passing day and passing year he hide his care and concern for her inside him where not even he can search it

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As she grows up, he with his every action tried to make her realize that she meant nothing to him, he was not the one who, like his other family members will turn the world upside down for her happiness. He never spare a chance to mock her, insult her or abuse her but like that crying Khushi who had find solace in his arms, she always come to him with her every little issue. No matter how much he disgrace her, it was like she was not affected by any of his actions or words.

He wanted to keep a distance from her with every passing day, as he realized that she was unknowingly and slowly walked in his personal territory. He was 12 years old when first time he raised his hands on her.

She came happily to show him the Rakhi, seeing the Rakhi he felt an unknown anger arousing in him and he pressed her neck. When Anjali came he went from there and after that he cursed himself for raising hand on her. He punched his right hand hardly on the wall and it somehow calmed his nerves, getting the pain somehow equal to what he did to her

And then it became his habit, first he gave her pain and after that when he was alone he hurt himself for doing it to her

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He broke down when he came to know about Neha's illness, but when she told him about her last wish, his whole world shattered

"I'm not a kid anymore, mujhe kya pata nahi hai ke aap log kya kerna chah rahe hain (What do you think, I don't know what you are trying to do)"

"Please Arnav baita, apni maa ki aakhri khawahish samajh ke hi sahi (Please Arnav, my son, fulfill it as it is last wish of your Maa)"

"No Maa, I …. I can't do this ….. Mujh se nahi hoga (I can't do this)" He shook his head crying badly but Neha pleaded

"Please Baita (son) yeh meri aakhri khwahish hai …. Tumhain aur Khushi ….." He shook his head furiously

"Maa, Khushi is very young … she … please Maa….."

His crying was not stopping

"Please Maa tell her the truth but what you're saying us to do …. It is wrong …. I … I cannot do it"

"No …. No Arnav ….. Anjali …." Neha take both of their hands in hers and spoke, "Promise me you will not tell her the truth till she becomes 17 … Promise me"

Helplessly nodding his head he promised and agreed to do what his mother wants form him and he get married to Khushi

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When Neha died, he promised himself that he will always hate Khushi and he will never forgive her but it was after two days of her death when he came in the lawn to have some alone time and he saw Khushi there, curled on the grass she was trembling, she was unconscious, Panicked he came to her and brought his hand to her shoulder when his hand left hanging in air as his promised resonated in his head. Frustratingly closing his eyes he took her in his arms and takes her to her room

He made her lie down on the bed and tucked the blanket around her. Closing the door he came out and asked the maid to feed her something

He was wrong; he can never hate Khushi, never in his life. He sighed as the realization dawned on him

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With every passing year his abusing and insult to Khushi rise but with that the love in his heart for her grew stronger than ever. As he grew older he realized that Khushi was an angel in his life, he could not share his feelings to anyone so he starts writing them secretly in a diary but he never mentioned her name, so no one ever found out that he loves Khushi

Every time he told her to get out of his room, he knew how much he cried after telling her that

Every time he told her that he hate her, he felt himself hating it even more

How every time when she call him Bhiya, he told her not to call him that, because he just want to hear only his name from her, not anything attached to it

He disgraced her, humiliated her every single chance he got, it was not out of the hating, but he was concerned for her. She was so much younger to him, she has a whole life to enjoy and yet she was trapped in this forced relationship which was unknown to her. He wants to see her happy and successful in her life, even if he has to bear seeing her happy with any other man who would keep her happy and fulfill all her dreams, he would do it

Initially there was just care but when Shyam entered in his life he has to protect her from that evil. Shyam was the one cheapest person he'd ever come across. He had a crush on Lavanya who was though one year junior to Arnav but as Anuj, his close friend liked her so she became a good friend of Arnav also.

He always warned Shyam to stay out of his friend's lives but his creepy mind think evil of it and he bad mouthed about him and Lavanya. He had stolen his Di from him and he said that he will snatch everything from him which is close to his heart, so he shut his heart to the world.

He opened to Lavanya when both she and Anuj were going abroad, he shared everything which he'd felt for Khushi but he took promise from her that she will never disclose it to anyone.

He was anxiously waiting for her 17th birthday as he would end all this torment which he's going through but again he's been stopped by Anjali

He wants to hurt her to the extent that when she know the truth, she would hate him and he did every possible thing he could to hurt her but what he did …. He broke her

Even today when he remember how she break down in office, his hating to himself increase

"Khud ko Di ke saath compare mat kero (Don't compare yourself with Di), you've created enough drama, I damn care ke tum kaise ghar jao gi (how will you manage to go home), JUST GET OUT FROM HERE"

He remembered her eyes going blank as she stared in disbelief at him, she took step to leave but she fainted in front of his eyes and he although his hands were itching to hold her, grab her but he stood his ground and when Aakash took her out of the office he left from there, Driving rashly he stopped the car on an empty road

"Ar …. Arnav Bhiya please … please just say once that it's not true" Her hurtful gaze flashed in front of his eyes

"DON'T COME NEAR ME" He recalled how she retreated when he tried to stop her from moving out of the office, she was upset and he cannot allow her to go alone in this state

Coming to the nearby tree he punched his fists on it.

"WHY …. WHY …… I HAVE TO GO THROUGH ALL THIS …… WHY I CAN'T HAVE A NORMAL LIFE ……" He screamed as he cried bitterly falling on the road

"I can't see her like this, I can't …." He buried his head in his knees and after crying almost for hours he went back to home

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When he came back home what he saw was enough to shock him, Khushi tried to end her life …. How could she? And when he saw the cards and gifts, he was at the verge of crying with grief

"No …. Nothing can happen to her …. I …. I … won't let ……." He murmured and asking the servant he headed to the hospital

Reaching hospital he just want to see Khushi alright but on the way he found Anjali

"Di ….. aap …." He was stopped by Anjali. He looked at her in shock holding his cheek

"Di …. You …. Slapped …. Me" It was unbelievable for him but he can't expect any less than this for what he did

"JUST LEAVE ARNAV, JUST GO" She yelled on top of her lungs and he shook his head in denial

"Aisa kaise ker sakte ho tum, DUNIYA KHATAM HO RAHI THI KYA JOH TUM AAJ KE BAAD USSE YEH SUCH KABHI BATA HI NA PAATE (How could you do this, WAS WORLD ENDING THAT YOU CAN'T TELL THIS TRUTH LATER)"

He closed his eyes painfully and swallowed his tears inside him

"HAAN HO RAHI THI KHATAM (YES IT WAS ENDING)" Opening his eyes, he shouted back, "DI MERI DUNIYA 12 SAAL PEHLE AAP SUB NE KHATAM KER DI THI (YOU ALL ENDED MY WORLD 12 YEARS BEFORE DI)"

He was frustrated at himself for causing pain to his beloved people, but he can't help it,

"Chotte woh mar rahi hai …. Who mar jaaye gi (Chotte she is dying …. She will die)"

His heart stopped beating for a moment but then masking his emotions he yelled

"TOH MAR JAAYE I DON'T CARE ……." he again get slapped by Anjali and he wanted to ask her to hit him, punish him more for his deeds but he skillfully acted and showed his hatred towards Khushi and then he came out of the hospital

As he turned to leave, the tears which he was holding back came running down his cheeks and soon when he came out his face was drenched in tears

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He was crying and driving rashly. His past 12 years were flashing in his head with all the memories, starting from the first day he felt for Khushi, when he has to hide away his love and care for her from others, when he had to control himself for not blurting out the truth in front of her but the last memory of her hurt…..

"DON'T COME NEAR ME" her voice was resonating in his head again and again

He put his foot on brake and car halted with a jerk.

"Why Khushi ….. why I have to love you? Why I am the reason to hurt you …. Why ……." He put his head on the steering and just cried

"You are an angel Khushi ….. you don't belong here ……" He again lifted his head and wiped his tears

"I wish she ….." Wiping his tears he want to ask for her death so that she can be at peace in some other world, but something stopped him, he felt as Khushi just called his name. It was the moment when she called his name "Arnav"

"Khushi" He looked around and then pick his phone from dashboard to call hospital but Anjali's words stopped him

"Aaj mujhe such mein afsos ho raha hai ke tum mere bhai ho (I truly regret that you are my brother)"

He was trapped. Why he has to always care and concern his beloved ones! He again threw the phone on dashboard

"I wish Khushi tum hamari life mein na aati (I wish Khushi you never came in our lives)" He leaned back his head to the seat, "Na mujhe tum se pyar hota aur na main yeh sub kerta (Then I won't fall in love with you and I wouldn't have done this to you)"

He came out of his thoughts when he heard the ringing of his phone

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He peeped at the screen, 'Aakash Calling' is blinking

"Kahin …." His heart stopped at his very thought what if she has died

"No …. No this can't be ….." He don't want to think about it

Mustering all is strength he pressed the Yes button

"Haan Aakash" He was hoping that his thoughts prove false

Anjali asked him to come to the hospital and he can't tell her that how much he wanted to be beside her, how much he wanted to know that she is fine

He without wasting moment drove back to the hospital

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As he entered in he could see the pale figure on the bed lying unconscious. Her left hand was bandaged. Her face when he told her the truth flashed in front of his eyes. The denial, the shock in her eyes, he sighed and walked to the bed, tears freely flowing down to his cheeks as now there is no one from whom he has to hide his emotions

He could clearly see her lips moving and without even listening to it he knew she was calling his name. Hesitantly he sat on the bed and slowly with trembling hand, mustering all his strength, held her hand into his

"Khushi" He whispered softly

He knew she could listen to him, while all the past memories flooded his head, he cried how curtly he'd behaved with her

"Khu …. Kh …" Not having courage to say anything he was about to pull his hand back when he felt her grip on his hand,

He was shocked … she … she could feel him

"I broke my angel …. I …" He closed his eyes painfully as a sob escaped his mouth

"Ar .. naav …." He opened his eyes at her voice. Diffidently he placed his hand on her forehead

"Do ….. don't worry … Khu …. Khushi …. Everything will be fine" Finally he managed himself to speak these words

He remembered how once she told him the same in his fever

He kept sitting near her on the bed for long, staring her as all his life he was just starving for it

He had asked everyone to go home and stayed with Khushi, at that time he decided that he will send Khushi to some hostel from studies where she don't have to face him or think about their strange and complicated relationship

"I love you Khushi … I … I love you more than anything in my life …. Please don't go …. Please Khushi ….. please come back …." e He Hhhe talked to himself in his mind, he cannot dare to speak these words when he knew she was listening to him but then chanting these words again and again and he lost control

He pressed his lips on her forehead and kissed it lightly, "Please Khushi come back" He mumbled and slightly lifted his head. Few moments have been passed, he felt the movement in her eye lids and then her hand moved a bit

His breath hitched, she came back for him! He mentally noted to himself and silently mumbled thank to God before calling the doctor

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His eyes opened at the noise of breaking glass.

"Khushi" He whispered and then looked at her, seeing her awake he went to her

"Khushi are …. You ok" He forward his hands to hold her but she moved back, he drew his hands back to his sides

"Aa …. Aap jaaien yahan se (Just go from here)" She was not looking at him and his eyes becoming moist now

"Khushi main ….." She cut him

"PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE" She said loudly, It made him furious at himself, but to play the facade, he wanted to reply something harsh but then her ailing condition and his Di's words stopped him

"Please Khushi se kuch ghalat mat kehna" He silently came out from there leaving a crying Khushi behind and her tears were falling straight on his heart

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Sitting on the bench, he cried, shedding tears he was regretting of telling her the truth, maybe Anjali was right, she could tell her in a better way, but in no case he can see her suffering

"I … all these years she thought I am her brother and now ….." He ran his fingers through his hairs

"Only if her father has taken her away she don't have to suffer like this" He remembered three years before when he tried to convince Shashi Gupta to take her daughter with him but he refused saying that he has responsibility of his other children and he cannot afford the anger of his family once again

He sighed

"No … I have to find someone who … who can give her all the happiness … I …." His thoughts got interrupted when nurse called him and in seconds he went in and what he saw left him dumbfounded and shocked

He rushed to her and held her hand tightly which was holding the scissor and tried to calm her

"Khushi stop it, what are you doing?" but she continued her struggle and tried to push him back. She was crying badly

He managed to take scissor from her but she was still resisting

"Choriye humain, hum mar jana chahte hain" This was enough, forgetting he was the one who wanted her to be at peace in other world just last night, furious at her words, he straightened her, he was not intending to do the next thing but it happened, suddenly her body stayed still and she was glaring at him shocked with her hands on the cheek

"STOP IT, kya prove kerna chahti ho that you are ……." Tears were rolling down her cheeks, she was dead shock ….. how could he slap her!

In a moment he realized what he had done, he slapped her! He gulped the lump forming in his throat and masking his emotions he shouted

"Listen Khushi Singh Raiazada tumhari wajah se ….. sirf tumhari wajah se mere aur Di ke beech itni doori aayi hai (Just because of you there are problems between me and Di)" He pointed and she was listening like dumb, "All I want from you is to sign the divorce papers and go away from our lives"

He fisted his hands for the control

"Aur next time don't you dare try any of your stunts to grab family's attention" He saw her closing her eyes and then he heard her

"Humain akela chor dijiye (Leave me alone)" He tried to speak something, anything but before he did she spoke again, "Hum kuch nahi karenge (I won't do anything)" She was not looking at him now, he silently came out of there

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Coming out he let the tears out of his eyes, he never cried for anything in his life after his parents died, but now seeing Khushi suffering like this he felt himself the most helpless person,

He hurt her, he slapped her!

As the realization dawned on him, getting up he punched his right hand forcibly in the wall, he kept doing it as her shocked face kept coming in front of his eyes unless a doctor stopped him

He knelt down on the ground and stared at his hand, now from some places the blood was oozing out

"Please forgive me Khushi … please …."

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She came back home. He avoided her for several days, but he tried to find a person for her, who will take all her sorrows and just give her happiness. He knew she can never be happy with him. She can never like a man like him who is arrogant and ruthless, who never cared about her feelings and so he met Rahul, he remembered she once told that Rahul is her friend, so he went to him

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This is not it 😉

Part B to it is coming very soon, till then

Enjoy Reading 😊

-Sumeela