May 07 2012 | 12:35
The one drawback of being intelligent is that one can rationalize any situation with lucid arguments and make one's chosen position appear accurate. Black can become white. Or was that the other way around? Yash Malhotra applied his prodigious mind and came to the conclusion that what he felt when in the presence of Anjali Raizada was nothing more than sexual desire gone awry. He had his reasons for reaching this conclusion. In fact, he had five reasons:
- Every man had a preference and Yash was--in using the vernacular--an ass-man. Anjali Raizada had the sort of derriere that made him look forward to her leaving the room. He hated to be coarse, but it had to be said.
- Prolonged self-enforced celibacy. Never a good idea. The mind may seek tranquility but a healthy body will eventually want action. Again, he hated to be blunt, but there it was.
- Elegance. Yes, elegance! Anjali Raizada was all things refined and sophisticated. And, every time he was near her, Yash would imagine what it would take to unleash the animal in her. The promise of that duality aroused him.
- Forbidden fruit. This required no explanation. Anjali Raizada would never engage in a sexual relationship with him. Hence, this fruit looked all the more ripe.
- The most subversive reason of all was her motherly nature. Yash was attracted to her kind, soft nurturing womanliness. Nothing kinky, but when he saw Anjali Raizada tuck his daughter in bed, he wanted to immediately lead her into the next room and take her to bed.
With knowledge came power: Having identified beyond doubt that there was nothing extraordinary in his pull towards Anjali, this mental list resulted in soothing his raging libido--at least for the present moment. Yash knew that the pull was as basic as sexual chemistry which, though powerful, was not unmanageable. She was in Lucknow for only a few days. What was it that his mother always said? 'Anything can be endured for a few days.' In fact, it did not even have to be a painful few days. He could enjoy the sexual charge for what it was. It was nice to feel that buzz again--it reminded him he was a man first. Then, a father. He could enjoy looking at her and being near her. After all, he was no squeamish untried youth who could not control himself around a beautiful woman.
So, by the time Anjali returned to the lounge--she had gone to the bedroom to fetch something--Yash felt quite relaxed and at ease with his new understanding. He no longer had to censor his admiring eyes. He took her in fully now, not averting his unprofesssional gaze as he had been doing this past week. He smiled openly. There was no danger. All he risked was his own sleepless nights.
"What do you think?" Anjali asked, holding up a girl's party dress.
He came to his feet and approached her. Taking the hanger out of her hands, he held the dress up. "Very nice," he said. "Has she seen it?"
"Of course. She chose it!" Anjali said.
"Oh, I thought you must have brought it with you from Delhi."
Anjali explained, "I meant to, but my decision to join Bhabhi was so last-minute-ish that there was no time to shop. Little Khushi and I went down to town this afternoon and found this." She took the dress from him, and asked, "you approve then?"
"Heartily. You managed to maneuver her away from those hideous pink frilly frocks that she seems obsessed with," Yash said. A quick glance at the tag on the dress told him how much he owed her. He reached for his satchel to remove his wallet and reimburse her, but she stopped him by laying a hand on his forearm.
"Put your purse away, Dr. Malhotra--you are dangerously close to insulting me," she said with a half-serious glare.
"Insulting you? You just implied I carry a purse!"
"A man-bag, then."
"Try satchel?" he suggested. "And, the next time you faint in my arms, you will be grateful that I carry a purse." He showed her the contents of his medical bag. He then removed some money from his wallet and placed it on a side-table.
Anjali said, "that action is tantamount to unfriending me."
"I would rather unfriend you, than unman myself." He saw something dark pass across her features. She turned away abruptly. He caught her by the shoulders, and gently forced her to face him. "I have no wish to offend you, but any expense you incur to please my daughter, I will carry. That is final."
She shook her head, and said, "no, of course. I understand. I was just...I think a part of me now believes that I have nothing to offer except my wealth."
Yash made a disapproving sound from deep within his throat.
She lifted her eyes, and made a small nod. "I know it's not accurate, but sometimes, especially late in the evening, when I'm alone, I think about how much I gave that had nothing to do with money. And, will it be realized now or will it wither?"
"Anjali--"
She held up her hand. "Please don't pity me, or think I am pitying myself--I'm not. I'm feeling remarkably strong these last two days. I'm even somewhat excited about a new life. I'm just sharing this because...well, because you are kind enough to listen."
"I'm not kind," he said, sobered by her words and ashamed by his earlier thoughts. One man had seen her as a purse to plunder; he had seen her as fuel for fantasy. He mentally tore up his list into shreds. She was far more than an object to desire.
"Agreed. You're not kind," she said lightly, beginning to move out of the grip he had on her shoulders.
"This is what I am, if you care to know." He brought his mouth down to her lips. It was not a kiss that hesitates and holds back before reaching the mouth. He did not hesitate; he did not hold back. Nor was it a kiss that asked for a response before continuing. He didn't ask. He simply kissed her as he wanted to kiss her. He pressed against her mouth and tasted her lips. He was not forceful; nor was he gentle. He drew her closer to him with an arm around her waist, as his tongue entered her mouth. Her cheek was pressed against his shoulder, and her face tilted up.
It should be mentioned that it was not one-sided for long. She did kiss him back. She fisted her hands into his shirt collar, drawing him even closer, and deepened the kiss. His free hand caught the back of her head so she would not break the kiss too soon. The kiss did eventually break--but briefly, and only to restore oxygen reserves. She took his mouth again, eagerly and--then from somewhere not far away, they heard a sound. Now the kiss did end.
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