'Why Ridhimma?'
It was cold. Too cold to stand amongst the flickering street lights as it brightened and darkened the road into a gloomy shadow and too cold for him to stare at her like that. Night had fallen and drowned the globe with dusk yet his piercing blue eyes shone bright like the moon itself. Silence was all that breathed out as he stood, watched and waited for her explanation. Impatiently.
Air had begun to dim and wrap around her neck draining almost all of the oxygen out of her lungs. His gaze had intensified with pique and irritation as weary silence shielded her. She opened her mouth... her mind fizzled into void and her heart sank. Air was all that escaped. The hurt and miffed stitched between the fine lines wrinkling his face made her flinch and shudder. She had never witnessed him like that...so blank and bloodcurdling. So unlike Armaan. It was too much.
She detached her gaze as it lurked to anywhere but him and the pile of questions that had stacked up in his eyes. Her eyes frantically absorbed the blackened scenery she was painted within. It was an empty street. No sign of cars, people or the living.
The only sound that echoed within the hollow dark street was the blurred thumping of music. Her heart begun to screech as it banged rapidly against her chest. She knew she couldn't make it back to the party. She could feel his eyes sharp on her waiting silently for an explanation. She had to get away.
"Why, Ridhimma?"
As she was to move, her legs halted and quivered at the gloom laced in his heavy voice. Ridhimma's face fell as her eyes interlocked with his. The bright blue had darkened and hindered. His lips clinched tight as he moved his sight away from her. He couldn't even stand to look at her.
Swallowing, she looked down at the concrete road. Her heart had paced up and no words formed to explain her situation. She couldn't whisper the truth. She couldn't tell him. She couldn't... do it. It was too stupid. She had to lie.
"Because... I just don't feel the same way anymore."
Lie. Her mind and heart ricocheted with a deafening volume. She prayed that her voice didn't sound as choked up as it echoed in her ears. Raising her gaze she could hear the shattering of her heart. A glaze of water dampened the dark green in her eyes.
She watched as his expressions deepened the ache in his face. His slim nose flared as his teeth clinched tight. His fists tightened. Blinding darkness draped upon her as if the moon shied away in fear. She watched his eyes fill with emptiness and erase any respect she held in his gaze.
"Why?" He asked once more. His voice more firm this time as he shook his head in disbelief. Armaan took a step forward. She stepped back as far as she could. She knew with another glance she would crumble and the wall she aroused will fall. She couldn't, wouldn't let that happen. He stopped as his eyes questioned her.
"Why Rid-"
"Because I Don't Love You!" Ridhimma yelled wanting all the ache to stop. Wanting for him to just stop.
He stayed rooted to the ground as if someone had slapped him. She watched a thousand emotions flash in his eyes as his eyebrows furled together in anger. His face twitched in fury as his skin turned deadly pale like a ghost.
"Why did you sleep with me then?" He whispered dejected.
Silence.
"Because... I..I wanted to make sure I had made the right decision."
"Have you?"
"Yes." She stared right through him.
Armaan scoffed as he ran down his hands through his dark locks "That was so easy to say for you." His voice hurdled and choked as he whispered the words.
"You made it easy." Ridhimma retorted back.
Her mind swirled and cursed herself a million times. She pushed back her tears that threatened to spill and damp her face any moment now. Emotions rained against his face as it twisted and changed repeatedly. She knew she had hit a soft spot, exactly where she wanted to hit.
He left.
***
It had been two weeks and her tears still havent dired. Muskaan watched as Ridhimma snuggled to the couch with her chocalate ice cream, sobbing silently. She wanted to feel sorry for her. She really did. But she had witnessed this for five years. Armaan and Ridhimma. On and Off. On and Off. On and Off.
The glare and the sharp beep of her phone distracted her. Her sight moved away from Ridhimma drowing in a tub of ice cream to the new message. Rahul. Her bright brown eyes twinkled as her lips softly curled.
"Miss Me? I know you do... I miss you too. Anywho Same story with Armaan, still angry and the poor boxing bag is the one sufferring most. So sick of these two idiots, I am thinking about them when I could be doing something with you ;)"
Her eyes widened but darted at the phone just as quickly. Her body couldn't help but whisper in chuckles. She watched Ridhimma in the corner of her eyes as she turned to watch her with a swollen face. She ignored the silent cry of attention from her. Muskaan did what a best friend needs to do... hand her ice-cream and tissue box with the film Notebook. The rest is upto her.
"Uff Rahul. Kutha. Kameena. Beshraam... What do you think of yourself? Saala. I dont miss you but... meri idiot se boyfriend I love you <3. The mood is suffocating here. Save me."
Sent.
"The mood has been suffocating ever since the party. Why does Ridhimma always do this to him? I will save you If You save me".
Muskaan felt a sudden rush of blood boil within her. Why does Ridhimma do this? Does Rahul even have the slighest of idea what he is talking about? Her mind yelled. Her nose furrowed as the lovey dovey feeling faded away from the air and anger simmered in her.
"Its always the girls fault! na? Hamesha. Do you even know what happened!? You know what f**k you and Armaan. I dont need saving from you!"
He replied just as quickly.
"Muski. Relax. I am not saying its Ridhimmas fault. Lets not let them affect what we have...us."
Relax teri ma! she muttered under her breath. Muskaan closed her phone tight. She didn't want to talk to anyone anymore. Especially not Rahul. Soft melodic music flowed within the room as she stood up. It was a familiar tune. Walking towards Ridhimma, the music became much more clearer. It was the big moment. The last scene. Her steps were heavier as a sudden urge to rush towards the TV errupted in her. She didn't want to miss it... no matter how many times she had watched it.
"The definition of endless love." Ridhimma stated looking lost among the scenery of the Notebook while Muskaan fitted herself on the couch and slyly removed the ice-cream from Ridhimmas grip.
"The ultimate definition." Muskaan replied.
***
2 months Later
"Ufff! Ridhimma... Just try to have some fun. Its not the end of the world." Muskaan tried to yell through the deafening thumps of music.
Ridhimma watched in amazement as muskaan swang her body elegantly, dancing. She could feel eyes stuck on them. She could almost smell the burning of girls around her as their eyes raged with jealousy. Ridhimma often wondered why Armaan didn't fall for Muskaan. She was beautiful. Smart. Classy.
"Muskaan!" A thick voice screamed.
"Rahul." Muskaan whispered. Her eyes wide and beautiful while she pushed ringlets off her face as she looked at him tenderly yet cold. Rahul stood with a wide grin stretched in his face and his hands on his ears mouthing sorry's. Muskaan tried to fight off the smile that sneaked on her lips. She couldn't help it. Neither could she stop the glow that radiated off her.
Ridhimma wanted to get away.
****
Feeling secure around Rahuls safe arms. Muskaan felt completed but something was wrong. Someone was mising. Following everyone else's gaze Muskaan watched Ridhimma walk near the exist gates. Her tight little black dress outlined her curvious body. The poise, the grace she held herself with was in itself beautiful, no one would have guessed she was heart broken.
If it wasn't for the tight hold Rahul had over her or his intoxicating scent that engulfed her, she would have ran to stop her. To calm her. To tell her its okay. But Rahul had his smile stitched in his lips... the cheeky one. The one that narrated to her something was cooking. She had feeling everything will be fine, tonight.
***
There he stood. Leaning on his black motorbike ever so calm staring at the moon. Being Modest was not in his agenda ever, and being handsome always helped his gigantic ego.
"Hello Ridhimma."
A soft gasp flowed through her lips. She didn't think he saw her. Her legs were ingrained to the car park, she didn't know what to do or think. She was not ready for this. For this conversation. Her heart was bleeding in pain Why couldn't he understand?
"Just stop Armaan." She yelled.
"5 five years. 1810 days. Again and Again. Back and forth. On and Off. It was always me vs something or someone. You always chose the other option... but Ridhimma here we are. Exactly where we are meant to be. Don't tell me you don't love me because I know you do. Just tell me why Ridhimma?"
He landed his piercing eyes on her. The blue was radiating in a colour she had never witnessed before. It was beautiful and calm like the sea, it made her relaxed. There was silence shadowing over them. She wanted to yell at him for leaving her when she needed him the most. She let the tears spill for him to see, for him to be hurt the way she was.
He walked over to her. A soft smile running in his face. A kind smile. A sweet dimpled smile. 'Why the hell was he smiling for?' she mused. He shook his head in a negative at her.
'Just tell me why we cant be together."
His voice was cool and calm. Too calm for her liking. That was it. Something inside her snapped. She narrowed her eyes as her chest huffed and puffed in annoyance. He never understood. He didn't want to understand her.
"You want reasons. I have got a list! 1. Your arragont. 2. Your ego is as big as the iffle tower. 3. Your a loser. 4. Your an idiot 5. You think of yourself too much. 6. You think you know me when you dont. 7. You leave your clothes everywhere. 8. You snore. 9 You..."Tears were still dropping like that of a waterfall.
He laughed as he closed in the distance between them. Her breath was running out as she could almost smell his perfume lingering in the air. Her words were getting softer. She was breathless. Intoxicated.
"Tell me why Ridhimma?'
"Be...cause... I...I..I... HATE YOU!" She spat out.
He was really close, so close that his breath tingled her skin which had awakened goosebumps. She was shivering. Her cheeks heated up to a dark crimson as he leaned in and captured her lips with firey passion that sent chills in her...
Okay this is sooo different to anything I write, ever. But blaah hope you like it! Felt like writing since It feels like forever that I have written anyfin. The answer to 'Why Ridhimma?' was not totally there because hellooo us audience never ever know why Ridhimma does anything in life. lOl! ;) But if you read carefully there might be hints to why Ridhimma broke up with him.
ps: Ignore Grammer and Spelling mistakes. I am the laziest writer out. Edited by ..KaJenDelena.. - 13 years ago
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
Advocate Anjali Awasthi
Members Lounge
