'MAIN KAMLI MERE YAAR KI' RANJAN OS- part 8 - Page 4

Created

Last reply

Replies

230

Views

22.7k

Users

32

Likes

223

Frequent Posters

NamuVyas thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 11 years ago
#31

Originally posted by: Sasha_Yuvreen

It so adorable...i have a guess that ranvi's is playing with her😉 - a gesture that makes the story even more romantic😳...even i got equally excited/disappoinnted when he called her name and then said bye😆

Infact i was yearning for someone to write a ranjan lovestory/ continue others, esp amidst current track...so thanks for that😉, waiting for the next part😃


hey shasha love u lots... i was actually unsure how this OS will be received considering all thats happening in the show at the moment.. was wondering if anyone would be interested in reading an OS on ranjan..
but i am so glad with the response of u guys.. my second part will be on the way very very soon.. i am planning to add a song as well .. and its not gonna be a smooth one surely.. i have just planned to reverse things here lol😆
NamuVyas thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 11 years ago
#32

Originally posted by: juggaad

Your story was fine. But I would have enjoyed it more if you used punctuation and maintained the same tense throughout. You started off in present tense and suddenly shifted to past. I hope I didn't offend you.


hi buddy... thanks for ur comments 😃
actually in the part the starting is in present only... and when she sees off ranvi its actually past.. she sees him off and then comes home..
i basically wanted to intro gunjans feelings first and then come to ranvi and her bit with him...
actually frankly i am not great at writing.. but i have lot of ideas in my head for ranjan.. so i started writing on the forum and i am glad a lot of people enjoy and respond to it.. i probably visualise things like a scene in my head and then just pen down the feelings.. but i actuially run out of words.. my vocabulary is very average...
i will try to improve my writing methods for sure..thanks for ur inputs😊
NamuVyas thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 11 years ago
#33
hi guys sorry for the delay.. was bit held up in life...

Gunjan reaches ranvis house... she is excited for veeras return..

She slowly enters the door and looks around and sees ratan sitting there... and ratan notices her..

"are gunjan.. andar aaja.. wahan kyu khadi hai.. aur yeh sab kya ahi?"

Gunjan is carrying two heavy jars... she smiles and says " haan chachiji.. yeh who kuch naashta hai.. veera aayi hai na.. to maine uske waaste banaye hai"

Suddenly veera comes there and speaks up "gunjan didi... to mainu khilao na" she says in happiness and gunjan puts the jars on the table and they both hugged in delight..

Veera happily says " gunjan did dikhao to aapne kya banaya hai.. aapki haath ke bane naashte ka kya kehna"

She opens the boxes and sees lots of snacks in them.. and in one of the box is full of mathris..

Chaiji suddenly speaks up.. " are wah gunjan.. yeh to bahit saari cheesei banayi hai tune.. par jahan tak main jaanti hoon , veera ko to mathri pasand hi nahi aati.. bachpan se.. yeh to tub hi jaanto hai"

Gunjan fumbles " haan.. acha.. veera tujhe abhi bho mathri pasand nahi hai??mainu laga ki inne salo mein shaayad tujhe pasand aane lagi hogi.."

"koi gal nahi veera.. yeh sari mathri ranvi nu khila dena.. use to bahut pasand hai na"

Chaiji gives a naughty smile to veera who responds back.. gunjan seriously looks at them bit worried and thinks whether her act was caught..

Suddenly veera catches gunjans arm " chalo didi.. mere kamre mein chalet hain.. aapke waaste kuch laayi hoon"

Gunjan smiles and goes with veera...

Veera has brought a lot of things.. she opens her bag and shows her many things that she bought for the house.. then she removes a bag and gives it to gunjan " didi.. yeh salwar aapke liye"

Gunjan happily takes it and opens it.. it's a light peach colour beautiful dress .. gunjan feels bit disappointed.. " veera.. yeh salwar to wadda pyara hai.. par ae rang??tenu to pata hai mainu kiase rang pasand hai.. lal hara.."

Veera smiles " haan gunjan didi.. mainu pata hai.. aur maine bhi yahi kahan tha.. par veerji bhi na .. kehne lage yeh rang jyada accha hai.. to aakhir mein yehi lena pada mujhe"

Gunjan looks in astonishment to hear that ranvi chose it for her

aap na chinta mat kijiye.. isse apne dost nu keh kar badalwa doongi'

Veera starts taking the cover back.. but suddenly gunjan holds it back.. " are veera.. koi bat nahi.. wiase bhi na ae rang mere paas nahi hai.. main yehi rakhoongi.. ranvi keh raha tha to shaayad accha hi hoga" she says with a smile " accha chal veera main ab chalti hoon..mainu kahin jaana hai"

Gunjan walks out to leave and suddenly crosses ranvis room... she suddenly goes back near the door and sees if he is there..

But he isn't there...

So she goes inside and looks at herself in the mirror.. and starts admiring herself like a little girl.. suddenly she turns back and bumps into someone..

She could feel a masculine body to which she was holding.. slowly she lifts her eyes up to see ranvi... her heart starts to beat faster and an awkwardness surrounds her.. and she moves back and starts to go

Ranvi calls her " gunjan.. tu itthe ki kar rahi thi?"

Gunjan feels caught " who ranvi.. kuch nahi .. main to veera nu milne aayi thi.. aur yahan se guzar rahi thi to socha tujhe bhi hi shai keh doon" " hmmm.. ab mein jaa rahi hoon"

She starts to walk by ranvi fast

But suddenly he holds her arm.. gunjan feels tensed.. " ruk...' he says and turns her around

And hands over a wrapped gift to her.. gunjan is surprised and slowly takes it from him " ae ki hai ranvi?" she questions

" who tune maanga than a.. dilli se kuch lane ke waaste.. to yeh.." he says moving away from her and pointing his hand out to the gift

Gunjan takes it very happily.. its looks very strange to her.. but she quickly opens the cover and finds a recipe book in it.. gunjans eyes widen in frustration... she questions back to ranvi "ae ky hai ranvi"

he looks at her in confusion " gunjan.. naye naye vyanjan di kitaab hai.. tenu to khana banana pasand hai na.. to isme se pad kar bana sakti hai"

gunjan walks away in anger and ranvi tries to stop her " oye gunjan.. meri gal to sunn.. kya hua"

but she doesn't listen and runs away..

gunjan reaches home and goes to her room very angry... and puts all the things on the bed in irritation..

but suddenly she sees the dress that veera gave her.. and she gets a smile back on her face.. she takes it out and decides to wear it and show it to ranvi..

she gets dressed and wears matching jewellery and gets ready... and goes to the fileds to meet Ranvi..

Ranvi is very busy having a discussion with dalveer and other farmers...

Suddenly Gunjan appears at the back almost cat walking in her high heels and playing with her choti.. all the farmers and dalveer start looking at her with wide open eyes and stop listening to Ranvi..

Ranvi suddenly notices that noone is listening to him.. he gets angry.. but then he suddenly sees Gunjan walking towards them and realizes what the problem is..

He tells all of them to disperse to work and he and dalveer start walking to gunjan..

Ranvi questions Gunjan " Oye gunjan ithe ki kar rahi hai?"

Gunjan smiles at ranvi hoping that he has seen the dress she wore.. Ranvi looks at her confused and looks around to know why she is smiling.. " Gunjan... ae muskuraa kyu rahi hai.. kuch kaam tha ki"

Dalveer is giggling to himself

Gunjan gets annoyed.. " Ranvi.. tu andha ho gaya hai kya? Tenu main theek se dikhayi nahi de rahi kya?"

Ranvi is more confused " Gunjan.. tu ki keh rahi hai.. mainu nahi samjh aa raha" he says in a very soft tone

Gunjan gets confused " Ranvi.. ae... ae salwar veera mere waaste shehar se layi thin a"

Ranvi smiles at her " Acha to tu mainu ae dikhane waaste aayi hai?.. Par mainu kyu dikhana chahti hai.. Veera layi hai to use dikha de"

Gunjan is more confused now..

Ranvi continues " EK kaam kar.. Dalveer tere ghar de vahaan jar aha hai.. uske nal chali jaa.. chad dega"

Gunjan gets angry.. " Koi jaroorat nahi hai.. main akele bhi jaa sakti hoon"

She starts walking away making some faces in angst... and talks to himself " ae veera ne mujhse jhoot to nahi bola ki ranvi ne ae salwaar chuna tha mere liye"

Ranvi starts getting back to work.. but dalveer stops him to talk.. " Ranvi.. ae sahi nahi kiya tune.. kinne pyar se saj ke aayi thi tujhe dikaane ke liye.. kuch accha hi bol deta use.. mainu aisa lagta hai ko shaayad who tujhse pyar karti hai"

Ranvi smiles back at Dalveer and puts his hand on his shoulder.. " Nahi Dalveere aisa kuch nahi hai.. hum bachpan se ek dooje ko jaante hain.. aisa kuch bhi nahi hai.. aur gunjan to aisi hi hai.. thodi si kamli.."

Vinder90 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Commentator Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#34
di, another very well written part,
looking forward to future parts if you have planned them. .

gunjan fearing to be love detected lol, and tryin to get ranvi attention. . . so pleasant to read. . . i can forget about whats goin on now coz this OS is infinitely better planned!! !! 😆

👏
Edited by Vinder90 - 11 years ago
MuslimGirl thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#35
wow lovely work di...gr8 work...!! ❤️
RanJan rocks
--swati--- thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#36
thanks di for updating 2nd part 🤗. Lovd Gunjan-Veera talk 😊 (missing their bond alot 😔)n last part was really funny 🤣.Big smile in face after reading ths 🤗.Ths is our Ranjan cute,swt,lovely ❤️ 😳
Sasha_Yuvreen thumbnail
12th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#37
Loved it NJ, ahh, Gunjan is soo cute!...but feeling bad as there is gonna be a reality check (about knowing herself) before happy endings😉 , miss veera- gunjan bond, but their part was nice😊
Continue soon...drop by drop we will make chullu bhar paani of hope in this dessert of Ranjan positivity 😆
NamuVyas thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 11 years ago
#38

Originally posted by: Sasha_Yuvreen

Loved it NJ, ahh, Gunjan is soo cute!...but feeling bad as there is gonna be a reality check (about knowing herself) before happy endings😉 , miss veera- gunjan bond, but their part was nice😊

Continue soon...drop by drop we will make chullu bhar paani of hope in this dessert of Ranjan positivity 😆


as they slow and steady wins the race in the end.. so with ranjan i gues.. but i enjoy writing romance for them and read it than the whole saidstic drama on going now.. next i will try to make it bit romantic may be add a song too😃
537048 thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#39
ranvi is dumb seriously
nd gunjan she is so sweet
hope bhe gets her hint
do update soon
manishasatpathy thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail Networker 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#40
awesome update gunjan's character is so sweet and lovely in ur story hope the cvs had done the same thing instead of ranvi being after gunjan it shud have been the other round thats what i had always thought seeing them pre leap kitni achi story hoti

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".