virman- a new tale of eternal love....

papu24011999 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#1
Hey... I am new to the forum...
I have no idea how to write a story...so, guys...pls criticise me for my mistakes...so that I can correct myself...
In my story, both jeeman and vv bros are going to the same school...
In school, they are just friends...
But, later they find some more about themselves and their relationships...



So... pls say whether I want to start writing the story or not?

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pink1 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#2
nice concept update soon
and pm me
papu24011999 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#3
Sorry,guys... I don't know Hindi...so, the posts will be in English only...
And pls comment in English only...
papu24011999 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#4
sry guys... i have been out of station for a long time...
so only i couldn't post my story...
i didnt gt much comments on my concept...
pls comment...
if u dnt like the concept also, u can comment that...
pls comment...
LoverBollywood thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#5
Pleaseee write..
Early waiting for your updates..
niki795 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#6
nice concept
do continue
plz pm me
papu24011999 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#7
sry... a very big sorry to all...
here is a short update of the first chapter of my story...
tell me whether its gud or not...

New place...
New school...
Why did dad got transfered to this place?
I miss my friends a lot...
i dont know how i am gonna be in this school...
even di is in the other division...
i have no idea about people in this place...
"di,can you please change to my division? we are in same class but in different divisions... why does this happen to me always?pls..."
"mannu,stop this... i am also sad... i will try to change,yaar" said jeevika di...

oh god! i forgot to introduce myself...
i am manvi and she is my twin sister, jeevika... we are in 4th standard...
i love her a lot...and she too loves me a lot...
in the new school, we are gonna be in different divisions...
i dont know how i am gonna be without her...

"mannu, come..."
"ok,di"
"this is my class...i am going... yours is the one over there...bye"
"bye...di...pls change the class..k?"
"i will...go quick or else the class will start.."
"bye..."


i am terribly afraid... being a new student is not too good...

in the class...
rohan-"tanvi,keep those marbles there and put the mat over it... lets see who is the unluckiest guy in our class... hahaha..."
tanvi and some students laugh...
they do as what he said...

manvi coming there...
she steps on it...
"aah!!!!!"
but she didnt get hurt...
when she opened her eyes,what she saw was not believable...
she was on a boy whom she barely knew...
she tried to get up...
but as her chain got stuck to his shirt button, they fell down again...
but this time, they accidently kissed each other...
the boy took off the chain from his button...
he got up and went away casually...
but manvi was embarassed...
the whole class was looking at her...
LoverBollywood thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#8
Awesome update...
Loved it...
Awww Jeeman are in different classes...
Awww how was the guy??
The accidently kissed...
It was short but i was really good...
Update soon..
Thanks for the PM..
sandhYA_123 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#9
AWESOME UPDATE DEAR. REALLY A SHORT ONE BUT LIKED IT VERY MUCH. SO MANVI AND JEEVIKA R IN DIFFERENT CLASS AND BOTH R TWINS. MANVI FELLS BUT I THINK VIRAT THE HERO SAVED HER AND ACCIDENTLY BOTH KISSED EACH OTHER LIKED IT. SO NOW CLEAR WHO IS THAT GUY. PLZ NEXT TIME UPDATE BIG ONE UPDATE. PLZ PM ME AFTER UPDATING. TAKE CARE.😊😊😊u
niki795 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#10
awesome update
loved it
both the sisters are twins and in different divisions
is the boy virat
continue soon

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