Choice Moms

In 1992 controversy arised when one american tv character had chosen to be single mom by her own will and declared it another lifestyle. A big time controversy at that time has already become a trend in showbiz.

What do you think about this trend? Women .specially those who for whatever reason are not married but mature and financially stable, should have acceptable choice of getting babies either by adoption or by sperm banks?
• In another thread we are discussing about divorcee women and their difficulties for getting second life partner. so in such cases where women are alone do you think they should have an option of getting babies but not necessarily husbands?

Nice post Dew drop.

I think it is a huge responsibility to have children and raise them WELL.
I applaud the strength of these women ( Nina Gupta, Sushmita Sen, Ally needs a mac meal) and admire them in many ways.
However, as it is a hard enough task for two and gets even harder for a single parent, they have to be

• financially stable & independent
• they have to have supporting infrastructure - family / friends who can be there at odd hours when needed
• courage to face and stand with head held high in society

One of the concerns that I do have for the child is whether he / she will feel incolplete without knowing where ELSE they came from. There could be developmental issues growing up among children coming from a mom-dad homes. However, since children of widows / widowers may face the same difficulty, I think the former is more of a unique challenge to them.

Having a career deprives several women from enjoying their full potential as a woman running the houseold in the right age. Many a times, time runs out before they realize it and then it becomes too late to settle. I think the availability of other options is a welcome change. I do think that we have atleast a couple of decades before it becomes one of the acceptable norms of living. Until then, it is ONLY FOR FEW.

I will come back with my views. Some old threads on similar lines

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/debate-mansion/113271/staying-single-by-choice-for-women-safe

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/debate-mansion/405336/is-there-anything-wrong-being-single

Single-parents families are becoming quite common in US but in India it is still limited only to upper class. In western countries with increasing number of divorces lot of kids actually live in single-parent homes so it is not a problem.

When woman is financially independent and can take care of a baby then there is no harm in adopting. One doesn't need anyone's acceptance in doing so. But there are some formalities one needs to fulfill before adoption.

One major thing a person before becoming a single parent needs to know is that taking care of a baby alone is not an easy task. You might be financially independent but there are times when one might need someone for emotional support. So if not a partner then a friend or a relative close by is good to relieve stress. One should become a parent only when she is ready for the responsibilities which comes with it.

Originally posted by: Maya_M

Single-parents families are becoming quite common in US but in India it is still limited only to upper class. In western countries with increasing number of divorces lot of kids actually live in single-parent homes so it is not a problem.

When woman is financially independent and can take care of a baby then there is no harm in adopting. One doesn't need anyone's acceptance in doing so. But there are some formalities one needs to fulfill before adoption.

One major thing a person before becoming a single parent needs to know is that taking care of a baby alone is not an easy task. You might be financially independent but there are times when one might need someone for emotional support. So if not a partner then a friend or a relative close by is good to relieve stress. One should become a parent only when she is ready for the responsibilities which comes with it.

Ok, I have an acronym to make IAWM (I agree with Maya) as I am tired of typing this everytime I quote her.

I do agree with everything you said, specially the underlined part👍🏼. If one has thought it all out and feels ready to take on the responsibility I think they have every right to go ahead if they fulfill the requirements.

What do you think about this trend?
It sounds wierd to me...

Women .specially those who for whatever reason are not married but mature and financially stable, should have acceptable choice of getting babies either by adoption or by sperm banks?
I think if a women is, as maya said, ready for the responsibilities a child brings with himself, and can afford to provide the child care and comfort, and is financially stable then i see no harm. However, she must also keep in mind the society and should be ready to face all those challenges too.

In another thread we are discussing about divorcee women and their difficulties for getting second life partner. so in such cases where women are alone do you think they should have an option of getting babies but not necessarily husbands?
I dunt really understand the topic...

Really good topic morning dew. 👏

I think divorcee parent and raising kid by single mother are little bit different situation. In Divorce kid is attached to father and mother both when raised. He/she has the pre bond with parents already and it is hard for them to choose one. According to this topic, adopted kid is not exposed to new parent at all. For him/her it will always be a new start. In divorce case, kid is in a merry situation already and was used to happy family with two parents being around and then to live without one is hard situation for him/her. In adoption, most of the time (please see "most", not all) kid is coming from disturbed background; adoption center etc where personal attention is not possible like in nuclear family. For them going to better responsible parent just giving attention to the child is better than what he/she might have come from. So these are two basic difference.

Personally, I adoption center usually do their homework before they choose family for a child. If it is a single potential parent who is responsible enough to take care of a kid I don't' see any reason why they should not be allowed. Taking care of a kid who needs family is a noble cause and if there are eligible families out there who would like to give them love and home, why not? I am not too sure, but Sushmita Sen also has a child right?

very good topic i will come back with my views, gilmore girls is one that i like and i admire sush for one of these reasons 😉

Originally posted by: Dabulls23

All power to those women who are Emotionally, Financially matured to be single parents if they chose to be one.

👏 👏 👏 i agree with you