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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

@Drilabh_Suhaani

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Posted: 14 years ago

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

@Drilabh_Suhaani

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Posted: 14 years ago

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

@Drilabh_Suhaani

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Posted: 14 years ago

#17

Reserved for links to LATE ENTRIES

LATE ENTRY 1 -- https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/cid/1692383/case-of-the-missing-tiny-treskilling-yellow

(Late entries wont be accepted after the winners are announced.)

Edited by suhaani.cid - 14 years ago

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Suhaani/Drilabh (CID/MJHT)

@Drilabh_Suhaani

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Posted: 14 years ago

#18

Reserved for Anonymous Reviews

edit -- am not reviewing because i will sound biased as i know the authors' identities

ANONYMOUS REVIEWS

No offense at anyone. The reviews are just personal opinions of the people who have PMd me their reviews. Be encouraged and take it sportingly. If anyone feels I have not posted their reviews, Plz PM me.

Overall, there are a few people who have brought Tasha back into the story. For me, it would have been ok to have Asha or Muskaan as they were not shown 'killed', but bringing back the dead is something I am not in favour of. I think we must accept the fact that they are not alive. Just my preference.

No 1: There was a slight problem with the spellings. Nice story, however I am not sure if duo would do anything without telling ACP. There was the incident in Tasha's first episode where ACP said that even before sneezing they would take is permission, so'.anyway no issues.

No 2: A different style of narration. A few things - Vikram was called because he was working in connection with the Black Fang, but he wouldn't really 'instruct' Freddie. He's from another department and our CID team wouldn't take orders from him. Just my thoughts. Duo were missing for a large part of the story. Also duo explain that they staged their own murder by putting 2 bodies in the Qualis. This is a bit difficult for me to digest. How could our duo instantly find 2 laashes that matched their height and physique? Otherwise the overall plot is very good. Lot of action by the new officer Vikram. Also gave Vivek something to do. Good work.

No 3: Nice twist to see the actual intelligence officer being kidnapped and another guy impersonating her. But don't you think ACP would have at least known that the new officer is a lady? Had it been another lady impersonating the actual lady, it would have been better, IMO. Nevertheless, it was nice to see our duo heroically rescuing the 'damsel in distress' by risking their own lives. There were a lot of painful scenes, but that's fine. Looking forward to your next one.

No 4: Well, it is Bureau, not Burrow. I felt the story ended fast. Maybe some action and suspense and thrill could have been added towards the end. I did notice her (your) fascination for duo. Nice attempt, overall.

No 5: Enjoyed this one. Had lot of suspense and twists. But there were a few things which were not clear and I had to read some parts a couple of times to understand. Nice way to phasaofy Abhijeet and get him arrested. Very nice title 'Story'. Really??? I didn't know that!!!! ;-)

No 6: Sonali is back? May not do down well with some people, but at least you managed to keep out any kind of romantic stuff. Thanks for that. Plot was ok, you have deviated a bit. Freddie and duo were supposed to be driving together. What a title - Kissa duo ke kidnapping ka! This is really FW style, Hinglish. Couldn't you have thought of something else? Nice attempt.

No 7: The new officer Avantika got a lot to do. Only the 7 laashes were like a typical FW story. Could have avoided so many murders. Otherwise good story.

No 8: Nice to see Asha back. I felt she just popped into the scene. The manner in which 2 guys entered Abhijeet's house and ransacked it seemed exactly like it was shown in '150 saal purana khoon'. Loved how Abhijeet shouted the place where they were kidnapped to ACP in a cryptic manner. About ACP getting Kaliya released to save duo. I feel ACP wouldn't have really gone to that extent of getting permission from Home Minister just because duo were kidnapped. From what we saw in Traitors in CID, I feel this ACP would never have agreed to terrorists' demands. And duo ' they wouldn't have been tied down for so long and needed the others to come and rescue them. They would have tried to escape on their own, especially because they both were together. The new officer Rajiv didn't do much, he was just present, but that's fine. We can assume that the writer was playing Asha.

No 9: Rather unusual that duo would work on a case and ACP wouldn't know of it. Wow guessed Abhijeet's DOB very well'the year is a bit closer to now '.maybe 6-7 years before would have been more appropriate. And Abhijeet's disguised name is DAKSH???? Aur koi naam nahi mila??? (Hee hee) It was a nice story overall. Lot of shooting and action and injuries too.

No 10; Some difficulty in understanding 'yeh' is written as 'eh' and so on. Never mind, story is important. The plot mentioned that duo were either missing or kidnapped. But we didn't really 'miss' the duo . Even if they were on an undercover mission, there could have been an element of suspense as to where are the duo. The fact that they were on an undercover mission should not have been revealed so fast. Otherwise it was a nice plot. Good work.

No 11: There are some areas where the writer has mixed up the genders. ACP is fond of duo and if anything happens to them he gets upset, but he is not that weak as to collapse and sit on his chair. He's a bit more tough. No issues anyway, it was well written. Asha's return was a surprise, but would she have allowed duo to be hit so hard on the head? Maybe in FW style we'll find Abhijeet saying 'thodi acting hum bhi kar lete hain'. Didn't ACP know about Asha's whereabouts? When seen on screen this might be a bit more convincing.

No 12: Another title saying 'Story'. J Somehow I would have preferred the new officer Poonam to be a bit more subdued on her first day, and not ask the existing members their names. Also would have preferred to see ACP give her the case, rather than she asking him for it. Our ACP is a very senior officer, you know'.even duo don't talk to him like that. It was unusual to see duo living in a palatial house. Well, they are 'honest' cops, so''anyway'.moving on. It's also unusual to see duo doing things without telling ACP. There are a few things which I felt were a bit 'unlike' our trio. Even Tasha ' she didn't know that duo were fine, and I would have expected her to be worried, but she asks Poonan 'yeh lo its such a big match that's going to take place today and why is your face so dull?' Again unusual. The plot was good, match fixing in cricket match and all. Only the characterisation was a bit unusual. Good attempt anyway.

No 13: Lot of action and thrill. Though I knew all stories would have a happy ending, my heart missed a beat when Daya checked Abhijeet's pulse and was 'shocked'. The dialogues were very clear. Good story.

No 14: Nice story, with lots of drama, thrill and action. I was reminded of AC 8 when duo were going to shoot each other. For a mad minute I got some scary ideas'.anyway, thank God nothing bad happened to either of them. They were as smart as ever. Good story.

No 15: Some similarities with Talking Parrot. Another Sonali. I was confused if it's our Forensic doc or the old Sonali as in Story no 6. It's a bit surprising that Daya got injured in the shoulder 10 days back and ACP didn't know about it. Otherwise nice attempt.

No 16: Very short story'in true O Henry style. Daya's uncle??? Well'..I wouldn't want to mess around with his already controversial background. Anyway nice, different approach.

STORY 1

Really loved reading this story. Properly justified plot. Lots of dishum dishum. Master of disguise in mask. Abhijeet puts his coat on fire. Wow coat kissi kam to aya. Lighter scene was very good but lesson for criminals don't keep duo together. There were just few dialogues which doesn't feel like a CID officer is speaking more of filmy dialogues. Excellent story. It keeps you bind till you finish climax. Just a suggestion when new scene starts please give few space. Excellently introduced and used new character. Duo Hiding case from ACP excellent thought and flawlessly you fitted that in your story. Excellent. Keep writing.

STORY 2

First of all very good narration of story. I could actually see thing happening in front of me. Story covered from lot of angles esp. angle of writer him/herself. Vivek given chance to shine. Story was little long though could have been shortened. Twist after twist in your story. Every angle starting from duo kidnapping then finding vanishing, then finding life of Mr. Lal in danger then finding not of Mr Lal but Attoney, then finding involvement of DCP and Mr. Lal then finding Lal himself kidnapped it is case of twins and above all the message written was excellent although that page didn't burnt when car caught fire. Leave it just kidding

STORY 3

Well this story has everything. Kidnapping then entry of Ramesh in place of lady officer. hmmm. You beautifully left clues which all points that Abhijeet could be involved. Just a suggestion think from this point of view. All clues leading to Abhijeet actually solved by CID team and Ramesh doesn't speak anything this way he hides from CID team effectively. If he has laid clues then wait and let CID suspect their officer. Thinking from criminals point only. Ok Next Ramesh's first task should be to get hold of mobiles of duo and destroy. Bechara phas gya.

You have put all ingredients into your story kidnapping, bomb, deadbody of Abhijeet, suspecting CID officer, injuring duo. Well done. Just one part as I said above part could have made one more ingredient into your story that is suspense. Actually culprit was well guessed by his behavior. I really loved this scene'

Abhijeet :- Daya !!!! (And takes the gun from the guy's hand and shoots at Daya ... the bullet goes and hits the guy who as about to attack Daya from behind and he dies on the spot)

Abhijeet :- Tumhe toh nahi lagi ?

Daya (with a smile) :- Boss .. tumhaara nishaana hai .. chookega thodi ??

Did excellent job. Really loved reading your story. I really felt bad that you actually left 2-3 excellent clues and didn't used them properly to add suspense.

STORY 4

Very good story. Unique story. Unique starting with Disclaimer--- professional way.

Just loved unique idea to target economy. Loved that duo not kidnapped. Tejaswani thoroughly professional. Excellent Disguise scene. Vivek and Freddy given space in your story. In your story every character got chance just loved. Above all not at all dragged but Very Fast ending may be to keep length in control. Its just suggestion enter spaces after scenes atleast and in between longer scenes as well.

Tickets for ACP, Abhijeet and Daya were booked but ACP went alone. Just found like on scene missing. At airport ACP waiting duo didn't arrive then he choose to go alone leaving thought of finding duo as meeting is important and team is there to find them. Actually scene was fine but ACP shocked after reaching Delhi that duo vanished I would have loved this shock on Airport itself.

Just thought came to my mind not targeting your story.. Jaise Hindi films mein kam hi police time pe nahi pahunchti. Very rarely they reach in same way CID mein bomb squad wale late ho jate hai. I know they do reach but that in few episodes only.

Just loved reading your story. Excellent story. Keep writing.

STORY 6

First and foremost this story connected all things very beautifully. One can easily switch. It was all in flow. I loved reading your story. Well explained duo kidnapping. So many things which we haven't seen till today in CID like proper Computer Expert first of all. Computer related crime (Cyber crime), CID is victim. Criminals used mode of Forums but only my personal opinion CID must have backup data as well and actually everyone has Backup servers. Anyways just my personal opinion. Without going too deep into it I would say well executed story and at last Freddy's dialogue to ACP about 'brain' awesome and memory loss 'Abhijeet' correctly used his this weakness.

Sonali was properly used and loved that ACP gave more focus to bomb diffusion even when he came to know about Sonali gaining consciousness.

STORY 7

At one point felt your story took lot of work from CID excellent. 3 murders all in different way and duo missing. So 2 members less in team. Next I read 4 more dead bodies found. Mass murder. Wow . No clue. Clueless CID. Thank God intelligence officer arrived. Oh her team is finished. Nice joining between CID and IB. Avantika has lots of attitude. Full of attitude lady didn't like her at few points, my personal opinion only. Abhijeet 'Daya on undercover mission. Sapu, Pier Gun Club, Sam, aur Safe and Secure Security linked them beautifully. When Avantika told about bug I would have liked ACP sir to find out that first and foremost but he waited for Avantika to find out rather asking her about bug. When he knew he should find out. Find ACP sir neglected in your story. Mohit easily revealed number. Nice attempt. Keep writing.

STORY 8

Smooth written story. Introduced two officers Asha and Rajeev and used them properly giving proper space to both of them. Duo are rescued by fellow members. In your story there are lot moments which actually resembles quite close to FW.

I don't know but I loved this dialogue-----

Freddy: Aare ab muze kya pata kaha honge?? Aise sawal muze puchne ke bagaye tum bahaar jakar padosionse kuch puchtach karo.

Perfect fit to situation.

Why kidnapper left Daya's phone with him only, Kidnappers need to be smart. Its just my opinion and finally Daya slapped badla le liya and last scene trio and Asha lovely.

STORY 9

Well this story has lots of drama, emotions. Little lengthy story. Lots of injuries, fighting and firing (gun) in your story. Duo themselves going to hospital. Loved that. Disguise by duo and ACP excellent. Suspense was missing. Freddy got proper space. Avantika introduced appropriately and got appropriate space but when Avantika once backed from the case due to personal reason why would duo inform her each and everything. Confused may be I missed some point. Abhijeet hide laptop in locker why would he write folder name and password on piece of paper. If he had to give it to somebody then it was ok but he had not to give it to anyone. Secondly no one will keep passwords which are related to their personal information or their relatives or friends information. Anyone who will be trying password will try first these things only. Just my opinion.

Just a suggestion please give appropriate spacing so that easier to read atleast after each scene.

Overall nice story. Keep writing.

STORY 10

Opening with full suspense. Confused between Rajesh, Rakesh, Nikhil. 3 names of one person or I missed some point. Intelligence officer used appropriately. It has everything firstly witness, then witness falling in coma, not dying so still hope of getting clue from him. Duo in disguise and Abhijeet replaced that statues very intelligently just loved that whole scene Vishal didn't even checked once. Bechara. In your story duo neither vanishing nor kidnapped. Team knew about there whereabouts like that. Different. No dragging of story loved it. Lab scene appropriate whatever required. Keep writing

STORY 11

Interesting story. Asha in disguise helping CID team. Loved reading your story. After reading your story I really felt like I watched movie. It has everything, proper movie type climax and even songs were also played. No dragging of story. Loved that in place of duo (to show them killed) dummies used and not someone's dead bodies.

Found out little problem in reading Hindi written. I suggest you to write in English only if you have problem with Hindi. ACP's reaction on hearing phone wasn't expected that way, he is ACP he is trained. Little reactions were expected but proper drama type Anyways Keep writing.

STORY 12

Well duo vanishing then giving resignation (fake) then Poonam actually made it looked to CID that it might be kidnapping. Narration was excellent but to narrate few things you took long time esp. whenever Poonam visit duos house be it first time, then at night time. But one thing I must admire narration of house was excellent I started imagining that way and introduction of pets. Space for Villians is very less in your story i.e Criminals becharre very less. No confession also.

Abhijeet on screen. Different way to call CID. Surprise element for me was that Chinta on saying of duo gave fake information of bomb blast. He lived upto his reputation of giving false information. Just joking.

I think I may have missed some points in your story. Few things contradicting like firstly you sad 2 PM are coming then late it was PM and CM. (I know it doesn't make lot of difference though some special personality is coming that's it).

One thing I didn't understood why duo couldn't tell ACP sir about this plan and could easily tell to Poonam.

Keep writing.

STORY 13

Excellent story. I loved some dialogues a lot and read twice. In your story duo ko bahut baar behosh kiya gya. Proper space to each and everyone. Excellent use of phone jammer and scene where the force Daya to take truck after crossing first check post was very good. All action sequences were very good. Just loved reading your story.

Plot said they never reached Abhijeets house and Little lengthy story.

Keep writing.

STORY 14

This story also took lot of work from CID members. Find duo, kidnapped girl and then who killed Mahesh. Although everything connected but on first note they have to take all cases separately. Loved it. . Game-- who kill first to save girl. Exciting game. After this game story went fluently and on expected terms. Vivek given lot of space in your story loved it. But story was little lengthy could have cut short few dialogues. Nice connection and every officer got space to shine in their task..

STORY 15

Firstly story was little lengthy. Duo not reaching there home. It was your story (till now atleast) where ACP sir and full CID team trying to crack codes and find duo who were hiding from them. Duo Hiding and full team finding them and duo successfully able to do so also. Different from all. Story went to number of places and disguise was so perfect only ACP sir could guess and no other CID member. Duo tied away on sea shore how they release themselves. Then Bomb and later to hospital Abhijeet disguised as Wardboy and help Daya. It has number of elements in it. Ek ke baad ek. You covered almost everything which could be covered. Number of duo moments. But you could have left few general scenes for viewers to imagine as story could be cut sort in length just my opinion otherwise good, enjoyable story. Keep writing

STORY 16

Small sweet story. Narration was very good. Anagram. Old Liar'Dol Rail. Platinum in refill's. But why didn't duo contacted CID team means via mobile. They were waiting for team to reach. I am confused here. Very quick fast written story but narration of story was good. Keep writing

Observation:- In almost every story Abhijeet gained conscious before Daya and his

head do pain.

Story #1 - Very well written... I actually was wondering how come Salunkhe sir say that the guy was tortured and died of bullet wound...how come he didnt see the blue color due to poison..but then... i realized that this person is diffrent... Nice story... Great plot. Managed to keep duo kidnapped very well... and they esacpe all by themselves. "Hope readers can imagine it"- Nice way to cut down on pages and keep the emotional drama as readers choice :) Wonderful job done👏

Story #2 - Awesome story. Feels like i am reading a nice suspense thriller listed on new york times bestseller. Wonderfully written. Though DUO werent kidnapped or werent much a part ofthe story, the story kept me struck to it. A very fast paced and interesting plot. The Intelligence officer analyzing daya sir's car and the fall from that height... is done very well avoiding lots of drama. The analysis of the car falling down and getting burnt is very sherlock holmes investigation type. Great Work.👏

Story #3 - Nice plot. Everything is fast paced and well explained. The IB officer twist is good. ACP sir solving the whole case and finding abhi sir and daya sir is done in a very neat way...reminds me of ACP sir's investigation during golden era. Abhi sir and daya sir are hurt, yet are sucessfull in escaping all by themselves which is a very realistic point :) Dead body in the car... everyone thinking that it can be abhi sir is totally FW style ..AC series copy :) but good point is not much of drama involved in there. Good Work👏

Story #4 - Good one. There is a lot of deviation from the main plot, as duo were not kidnapped, and the intelligence officer did not come for duo's rescue. But the story was intresting. Seems like you got very little time to complete and no time for proof reading, as i can see you have made some small mistakes while last minute changes.. like sophia became Dang's daughter insted of wife...and Mansi's name was once written as rajashree. Well, the way Inspector tejaswini entered and the plot was very good. No injuries..no drama. Neat and simple story. Good One.👏

Story #5 - Lovely Story. Perfect plot, perfect suspense...everything was perfect. totally njoyed the story. Well... there is nothing much to say...other than that... it was just awesome.👏

Story #6 - Nice story. Very diffrent kind of plot but well executed. Not much work of the officer, but the way duo got kidnapped was very intresting. Missed a small mistake in proof reading... freddy says that daya sir left b4 intervel..but actually he left after intervel, but that is too small in front of the whole case. Suspense was kept very well till the end. Good job.👏

Story #7 - Wow.. Ek ke baad ek...dhadhad laashein...and wonderful name of the story :) The concept was nice, lots of planning and the case was well executed. Duo did not get kidnapped, but got vanished and were back to solve the case. That part was nice and diffrent from other stories. The new officer was good, ek dum strong and bindaas :) Very good story. Well done👏

Story #8 - Wonderful story. The case goes at a super fast speed. Abhi sir's dialog was awesome. Abhi sir and daya sir's kidnapping was quiet quick and the motive was good. The bomb diffusion and resucing duo going on in parallel is very good. The Whole story was very happening and fast paced. Two old members back for investigation but not you. Good Job. Well done👏

Story #9 - Great Job. Daya sir and Abhi sir's kidnapping scene were a little emotional, but then... they rescued themselves. ACP sir as balachandra twist was good at the end. Intresting plot and not at all boring at any scene. Very well written. Well done.👏

Story #10 - Nice story. Though there is a deviation from the plot, it is intresting. Suddenly the way Vishal and suraj start talking... i didnt get a doubt that they were abhi sir and daya sir. The officer's intro was also done in a unique way. Seems like you didnt get time to review ur story before submitting...rajesh urf rakesh became nikhil. Well, it was an interesting case. Great work done. Good Job.👏

Story #11 - Nice story. Good Plot. The beginning dialogs were very nice and then duo's kidnapping. I didnt get a doubt till the end that Duo's kidnapping was again a plan to save duo. That twist was really good. Never got doubt on the new officer, but again a twist. Nice intresting case. Loved the way you kept all the drama away. Great job. Well done👏

Story #12 - The plot was good, but duo did not get kidnapped. They just vanished to catch the criminal ACP sir had very little investigation to do, but the new officer was good. The way the team was used was very nice. well. i still didnt understand what was in that chit which poonam got, i.e the one attached. The case was short and sweet. Not even a single moment where it felt it was dragged. Things kept happening. Good Job.👏

Story #13 - Good story. very intriguing as to what was happening with duo. The new officer was good but i liked the way ACP sir solved the case. This could be a part of Chase series, used many clues from there. I liked the way daya sir rescused himsleves and abhi sir, but abhi sir getting hurt was total FW style. It would have been great if the main culprit was also caught. Good Job👏

Story #14 - Intresting story. Nakul's GF revenge. The way daya sir and abhijeet sir were kidnapped and ACP sir was framed was very good. Nice twist to the story for kidnapping the girl too. Daya sir and Abhi sir rescuing themselves was good, though they killing each other and video was fW style. All in all and intresting and njoyable case. Great Job.👏

Story #15 - Good story. Both kidnapping and vanishing act by duo. ACP sir not recognizing duo... was a little tuf to digest, but can assume they did some very good make up. The dead bodies in the car was total FW style, but thanks for not emotional drama. The twist in the case was good. Th suspense was on from beginning till the end... but you had to land into flashback to open the suspense. But the flasback idea was really good as it kept the suspense intact. Not much work of the new officer, but duo part was very good. Great story.👏

Story #16 Nice attempt. Short and simple. Duo were missing, but everyone thought they got kidnapped...so it was a plan... :) FW style. The new officer solved the case from the beginning till the end. the story was like a newspaper article by a cop about a real life action. Good Job.👏

STORY# ONE: very nice story... pace was fast n good... the ANJILI role was pleasently moved throughout the story... her SUSPECIOUS attitude always confused the reader either she is a POSITIVE character or NEGITIVE one... DUO always at its BEST...

STORY# TWO: WOW... WOW...WOW... wat a MASTERPIECE... everything was so APT... CLUES... FACTS... IMAGINATIONS... CODING... DECODING...PACE... CHARATERIZATION... NARRATION... SHARP MIND using INVESTIGATIVE point so well...VIKRAM character took my HEART... i rreally enjoyed to see VIVEK n ACP part... i m also GLAD that DUO presence was so less cz its the demand of the PLOT... hatts off man... i think its DEMONSTAR story...

STORY# THREE: very very good... the BEACH and JUNGLE part was EXCILLENT specially the ABHIJEET Sir shoot... WOW... but as being a READER the CULPRIT was quite OBVIOUS... i took it at very early stage... but rather that... very very good attempt...

STORY # FOUR: very very GOOD attempt... specially the MOTIVE was good... the character of TEJASWANI was NICE... the STOCK EXCHANGE part well examined... the CULPRIT was SOPHIYA... the GIRL... shuker hay... the bit NARRATIVE style also gives a gOOD charm to story...

STORY# FIVE: very very EXCILLENT detection... somehow i felt it SUNNY story... but wat a GLOW... specially the AKSHAY who always looked ACCUSED... the ABHIJEET jumped on TRUCK... the TOTAL IB investigation.. the LAST escape of AKSHAY by the help of ABHIJEET Sir... DAYA sir last fight... IB HEAD as a CULPRIT and specially JOOTAY UTARO... classical...everything thing was PERFECT...the story was bit lenthy at sum places... but really did not lose the GRIP of attention of reader...

STORY# SIX: this STORY CENTRAL IDEA of SHEETAL as an COMMUNCATION EXPERT was sumthing MINDBLOWING... its the most INNOVATIVE IDEA... the RETURN of SONALI was quite IMPRESSIVE... and specially ACP Sir and ABHIJEET Sir concern towards DAYA Sir to not to involve him was so TOUCHY... the IDEA of SERVER ROOM was zabardast...even i liked the IDEA of KIDNAPPING through THREATRE even that whole scene looked so REAL... last FREDDIE Sir comment was so cute...

STORY# SEVEN: NICE... SEVEN bodies at one story... the AVANTIKA charater was portrayed very well... even her character reminds me sumone... her style was AWESOME... TASHA returned was GOOD too...the CM convay scene... very nicely written... DAYA sir slapped to AMIT and interogation of AVANTIKA and DAYA Sir specially about that PHONE NUMBER was quite AMAZING...

STORY# EIGHT: good to read ASHA was back again... i need her return... STORY was quite nicely taken... RANA, JAY MANNU, KALIYA and RAJIV all characters portrayed very well... SCIENCE CENTRE bomb exploded scene was good... DAYA Sir Idea of MOBILE activation was also nice... story bit lengthy but very NICE so did not bored its reader...

STORY# NINE: frankly this story reminds me abt BHAVNAB DII... i m not confirmed but bit felt that she is the WRITER of this story... the CODES from ABHIJEET Sir writing... the NAIL at room lock... AVANTIKA entry... ANIRUDH and DAKSH... BALACHANDARAN rally n his bodyguards... everything was so approperiate... DETECTION/INVESTIGATION all dealt well... the LAST patch recognised FATHER and his CHILDREN was very very good...

STORY# TEN: very very NICE... have sum VISUALS reminds an EPI... NAKSHATRA character well portrayed... i thought this was the ONLY story got CHORI bhi nahi hui and MUJRIM bhi pakkra gaya... i think its DEBASHREE story... DETECTION was very well handled...

STORY# ELEVEN: its looking SHERYA story... the START was bit hilirious...the BET, specially ACP Sir tears... xtra ordinary different IDEA of ARMS smuggling in FAKE bodiess... quite MAZIADAAR... TWO nation ONE case... BAGU and all... the inclusion of ASHA wasnice... very nice... the KIDNAPPING idea of DUO and identification of ASHA by ACP Sir n DUO... quitely IMPRESSIVE... very good one but lengthy...

STORY# TWELVE: good one... the CRICKET FEILD...MATCH FIXING... very RECENT ISSUE raised...looking the WRITER is IPL fan... may be DK... POONAM character was too PROMISING... the CODING b/w her n DAYA Sir was good.. the inclusion of MAMTA FOUNDATION was quite different...the FALSE RESIGNATION quite ASSUMED by myself...very very GOOD attempt...

STORY# THIRTEEN: hmmm... so VIS DII is coming on my way now... quite approperite as she broke her CHUNKS of INSPIRATION earlier... VIS DII its not as CRISP... bit very much familier...but still it quite a PRICELESS CHARM to read her story... learntalot... after a long time... read DAYA Sir in complete ACTION... bit legthy as well.. SHIVANGI character was GOOD either SANGHA was a typical CULPRIT...thanx DII...

STORY# FOURTEEN: nice one... quite lenthy... sum scenes took me RICE GRAINED and Ins DAYA ABDUCTION episodes... the MORTAL GAME was quite good especially FIRED at same second idea was UNIQUE... shuker hay... the main CULPRIT was a GIRL... sumhow i feel this was RASHIDA story...

STORY# FIFTEEN: its LOVEDAYA story... she connected it from her LAST story...very GOOD IDEA of DUO PLAN... story bit lenghty... Mr FREDA n CRISTIN part really emphasized ABHI Sir TALENT in a very beautiful way... how he could change his VOICE, ACCENT, STYLE... TRUE analysis of all other members abt FREDDY is jus 40%... SACHIN have not sharp eyes... VIVEK etc..
zabardast..last patch also CLASSICAL

STORY# SIXTEEN:i dunt know wat i write abt that story... its jus in NUTSHELL... i personally enjoying the SAMARANATH part and specially NO DUO inclusion... but missed the other members activation... quite SHORT but very CONCRETE and COMPLETE...it would be GOOD to bit take it longer... but i really enjoyed a NARRATIVE version... i persoanlly learnt lots more from that one but hope this learning is WASTE for me cz i will not able to write like that in any nook n corner of my CREATIVE future...

basically GALS/GUYS i dont want to give VOTES on any STORY... WHY???? its really a big QUESTION MARK... i strongly feel that i m not able to give VOTES on such classical stories... all are ZABARDAST... CLASSICAL... EXCILLENT... even i have no such good VOCABS as well... U all got 10 out of 10 from my side...
ONE PLOT... treating in so many different ways are marvallous... i dunt have WORDS to PRAISE and ENCOURAGEMENT to all the PARTICPANTS... the step of ORGANIZING a CONTEST... think about PARTICIPAION... EXTRACT TIME from the BUSY SKEDULES... WRITE STORIES... use SAME PLOTS in different ways... READ them... give REVIEWS... ENCOURAGEMENT... SUPPORT... SUGGESTIONS... MARKS... wow... wow... hmmm...
i have only TWO HANDS... i m trying my xtreme level best and hope that my two small hands voice of CLAPPING enter in ALL PARTICIPENTS, ORGANISER, ACTIVE N STARIC MEMBERS, READERS ears loudly and my PAT on all URS shoulders encourages u...
one more thing.. if any of my ALPHABET, WORDS, SENTENCES of my FEEDBACK.. GUESS AWARD anything which HURTS anyones intentions...
i say XTREMELLY SORRY from core of my heart...

Edited by suhaani.cid - 14 years ago

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Bhavanab

@Bhavanab

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 14 years ago

#19

Announcement-

I'd like to suggest everyone to post all reviews together !!! As and when you finish you can write on word document or somewhere and post all the reviews altogether !! The reason being that Story writer one is getting maximum reviews ... and some who start from end give reviews for the ending stories ... but Story writers of stories 8,9,10,11 etc ... also might be waiting to read their reviews and see others reading reviews of their stories right ?? and those stories haven't got more than 1 or 2 reviews till now .. even they must be excited and desperate !!! So if possible post all reviews together 😊

Please don't comment here .. comment on the general thread !! This is only for reviews

Edited by Bhavanab - 14 years ago

Quote

visrom

@visrom

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#20

This thread has been locked for some reasons. The competition is very much on. Pls don't worry. 😛

I request all participants to go thru pages 120-121 on the Story - general thread and post your views there. Suhaani please decide on what is to be done and let us know.

Till then I am locking this thread. Please don't mind.

Those who want the reviews to be deleted - I cannot be online for a long time this week and cannot wait till the reviewers edit their posts/copy their reviews somewhere. Pls excuse me for that.

Edited by visrom - 14 years ago