HOW CAN I OVERCOME MY PHOBIA?
People with phobias have, as said, become 'conditioned' to produce the fear reaction in situations that aren't really dangerous. The best way to counter this is by 'de-conditioning': training themselves to react correctly. This is done by gradual exposure to the things they fear, experiencing the fears without running away, and so 'desensitising' themselves to that lash of anxiety which insists that only flight is an option. This process needs commitment from the sufferer. Sometimes anxiety is so high, the person is so sensitised to fear, that he or she cannot contemplate resisting it. Basically, so much energy is going in to avoiding what is seen as an insuperable problem that there is nothing left, or so the person perceives it, for trying to recover. In such a case a short course of anti-anxiety medication might be useful, perhaps a benzodiazepine. This won't cure the phobia, but it may reduce the physical symptoms to a point where the person concerned feels that countering with desensitising techniques is, at least, feasible.
... we have to learn our irrational fears, but we can also unlearn them ...
The idea of desensitisation is simple, and it does not necessarily require the help of professionals; but it does call for a fair amount of courage and determination. Family and friends can help make self-treatment much easier to manage, and this is also why many people prefer to join a self-help group where they can obtain support from people who have similar problems.
Fear of birds
Birds, especially pigeons, are a common object of phobic fears. This is a big problem for those who are affected, because birds are highly mobile, and although they seldom if ever enter a building except by accident, they can appear almost anywhere outdoors at any time. People with severe phobias about birds may find themselves confined to their homes, scarcely daring to open a window or a door in case a bird should swoop down.
As with other phobias, it is important to establish what exactly triggers the feelings of fear. With birds it may be the fluttering wings, the way they move, the way pigeons in particular walk fearlessly towards people, hoping for food. It may be the texture of feathers, or the fear of disease, or indeed any combination of these.
Once this is clear in your mind, you need to work out what you are capable of bearing now, and what you would like to be able to do in the future. A gradual series of self-exposure steps can then be put together, like this one for someone with severe pigeon phobia:
Step 1: Draw a small rough pigeon shape on a piece of paper.
Step 2: Work up to the biggest and most accurate version you can manage.
Step 3: Look at black and white photos of pigeons.
Step 4: Look at colour photos.
Step 5: Look at videos.
Step 6: Look at pigeons through a closed window (if they do not come to your garden, or if you do not have a garden, get someone to drive you to a place where they congregate).
Step 7: Then partly open the window and watch them. Open more and
more, etc.
Step 8: Look at them through an open doorway.
Step 9: Move further out from the door, then further, etc.
SOME HINTS FOR SELF-EXPOSURE WORK
The first step in the programme can be very simple - perhaps staying in a situation that can just be managed now, but for a little longer than before.
The steps can be as large or as small as necessary, and big steps can be broken down into smaller ones. But each step should challenge the anxiety a little more than the last.
Don't be overwhelmed by the size of the task. As a rule, the steps become steadily easier as you work through them.
Don't expect to be completely free from anxiety before you leave each step and go onto the next - it will go completely in its own time as you progress.
Make sure you work out what exactly about the animal is frightening. Is it the feel of it? Or the noise it makes? Or the way it moves? Is it the fear of being bitten? Or of disease? If you don't work out the real focus of your fears, you could be wasting time trying to overcome the wrong problem, or be making the work more difficult than it need be.
Reading about animals, and birds, including reptiles, can help.
Do the exercises as often as you can. You are trying to build up positive memories to replace all the bad ones of being beaten by the phobia, and too long a gap between efforts makes this more difficult.
An hour or so at a time and repeating this every day is best. Waiting until you feel 'strong' or until you cannot avoid it any longer is not a positive approach.
Do enough at each step to raise your anxiety. You are trying to get used to a level of physical symptoms that you can manage, and where you are in control.
Keep a 'self-exposure diary' detailing the exposure work you have undertaken and noting down the way you felt about it.
If it is possible to find someone to work with, who can talk to you calmly and positively while you are doing the steps (and not over-sympathising or endlessly asking how bad you are feeling) this can help.
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