Originally posted by: Kalyaani
"There are people who get less leaves in offices than Sanjay Dutt does in jail." - Rohan Joshi
"Indian mother logic:
After 1 missed call: He is busy. I'll call later.
After 2 calls: Why is he so busy?
After 3 calls: Oh no. He's dead." - Sahil Shah
"Which team needs to lose for Sidhu to be depressed?" - Sapan Verma
"Smriti Irani's swearing-in will happen in the next episode." - Rohan Joshi
"Love how the Indian term for being in a committed relationship and being in the hospital is same. 'Voh serious hai'." - Tanmay Bhat
"Table Tennis athlete from China called Ding Ning. If you say her name 8 times, somewhere Daler Mehendi starts to sing Rang De Basanti." - Tanmay Bhat
"Samsung should launch the S5, S5 Mini, S5 Grand, S5 Neo, S5 Double Galaxy, S5 Paneer Butter Masala and every other variant at one go." - Gursimran Khamba
"Federer announces the birth of his 2nd set of twins. You're a true champ: when even your sperm is so competitive, it keeps ending in a tie!" - Sourabh Pant
"Titanic re-releasing in 3D. If they still don't spot that iceberg then they bloody deserve it." - Jay Hind
"Neighboring family are having a very very loud fight and now the whole society kno... oh no wait, it's the AAP office." - Tanmay Bhat
"Advertisers today: Happy Women's Day! You're all amazing! Advertisers every other day: You're fat and ugly so give us money." - Ashish Shakya
"Just saw Arindam Chaudhari. Told him, 'I recognise you.' He burst out crying, 'I wish you were the University Grants Commission.'" - Sourabh Pant
"Always good to see Indians buy new plastic covers and then have a car built around them." - Ashish Shakya
"Kiran Bedi, Manmohan Singh, Derek O' Brien, & Floppy Disk 1.44 MB: Things that were awesome in the 90s but are horribly depressing now." - Varun Grover
"List of unforgivable sins, according to Indian mothers:
5. Drugs
4. Theft
3. Murder
2. Premarital Sex
1. Why didn't you eat dinner at home?" - Azeem Banatwala
"My mom is so OCD, she even wants to arrange my marriage." - Kunal Rao
"The last phrase that no American kid could spell in spelling bee was 'gun control.'" - Varun Grover
"'This page has insecure content.' -- I'm going to hug it to make it feel better." - Aditi Mittal
"Someone in Bandra will look at 4000 people at Rashtrapati Bhavan today and wonder 'Whoa, they opened a Dunkin there also?'" - Gursimran Khamba
"How to make money from Facebook and Twitter: (1) Go to 'Account Settings' (2) Click 'Deactivate your account' (3) Go back to work!" - Papa CJ
Anupamaa
