Ek to Rafi...you make it SOOO hard to follow up what you write on SwaRon. Matlab how can anything possibly be as good as that? No really, HOW? So everyone, kindly excuse the lameness that is about to follow. I can't pull of something that fantastic when I'm still under its spell myself. Jeez, Swaami. No consideration for Beghum you have these days. Writing so beautifully and nearly making her cry and all. Huh. 😳
So, here goes...
Sharon didn't want to open her eyes. She had just woken up, and she didn't want all of it to turn out to be a dream, in full filmy style. There was still a hint of some Raiprakash sophistication she had to respect in herself. Her life was not meant to be a tv serial. But she was terrified. What if she opened her eyes and he disappeared? Everything disappeared? And just as all this was building up a frenzied whirlpool in her heart, she felt a gentle kiss on her forehead, and everything was instantly soothed. Closing her eyes tighter, she soaked in what every other sense of hers had to offer. His arms were around her, holding her cosily close, she could feel his slow, quiet breathing softly ruffling her hair...and she felt a warmth wash over her. Opening her eyes slowly, she realised a part of that warmth came from the rising sun. They were huddled up in a thick quilt in this pretty little alcove in Swayam's room, a niche in the wall making way for a tall, clear glass window overlooking the countryside, lined with a squishy mattress and little cushions. After the first few agonising minutes of fear that it would all turn out to be a dream, Sharon had now moved to a state of barely believing what was happening. Last evening, Swayam returning from the bank, all bridges collapsing without a single word being spoken...and neither of them had realised how time had passed. The first flood of emotions having been passed, they had both come to this deeply-ingrained, inexplicable sense of tranquility. Wiping each other's tears, they had sat down, and had begun to talk. Just talk, like they'd never talked before, and about completely random things. Talked, late into the night, all thought of the world around them set aside, involving inane activities like eating dinner which Ramu Kaka had attempted to offer them thrice without the slightest response from either of them...making way for their own world. Which is where the sun rose today, and Sharon looked up through the tufts of hair strewn across her face at a beaming, smiling Swayam, obviously following the same chain of thought. Raising his hand, he gently brushed aside her hair and kissed her on the forehead again, giving her another little twinge of an unknown throbbing glow inside her heart. "Chhoti si, cuuute si bacchi lag rahi ho," he said, smiling like his face couldn't reconfigure itself into any other expression. Snaking her hand out from inside the warmth of the quilt, she pinched his cheeks nice and hard, saying "aur tum hamesha chhote se CUUUTE se bacche lagte ho. Didn't I tell you we were meant to be?" "YOU told me? Matlab, sab ho gaya, Sharon ki Sharon-giri wahin ki wahin!" Sharon grinned, her eyes glinting in a way Swayam had never seen them glint before, and it seemed to make his chest expand and fill with something warm and bright. He couldn't describe even to himself how he was feeling. So, he decided to quit trying to describe it, and just loose himself to it, wrapping his arms around her again as though willing himself to believe this was actually happening, she was here, with him, in his arms, for real.
As he hugged her again, he felt something in her jacket pocket. "Yeh kya hai?" he said, fishing out what turned out to be a neatly folded piece of paper. Sharon looked at it, and suddenly remembered with no little amount of embarassment, what it was. "Yeh, woh...maine, um..." Swayam couldn't help smiling still wider watching her embarassment. "Tumne kya? Can I open it? " Sharon hesitated..."I guess so. I mean, koi point nahin hai ab iska, but...well, I wrote this for you in case I wasn't able to meet you. You know how I am, I always have back up plans. Although this...isn't exactly a back up plan. I mean, I wrote it out at a time when I was thinking I'd lose you. Like for good. You might refuse to see me, or I might find you with some godforsaken firangan chhori, or...haw, don't laugh, I'm being serious here!" Swayam couldn't help it. "Godforsaken firangan chhori?! Some respect you have for Scottish women! " "Oye! I do too have lots of respect for Scottish women. Just not for those who try for a spot beside you, because that's my spot. Legit. So anyway...yeah, I was really sad when I wrote this for you. I'd have left it here with Ramu Kaka if you hadn't come back." Swayam was very curious now. "Main padhoon?" Sharon shrugged her shoulders, reverting to the slightly embarassed mode she had begun speaking with. Swayam opened the letter, Sharon watching him attentively, and by the time he had read to the end, it was as though every part of him was beaming. Sharon saw in his eyes, as he read through the letter, a dizzying movement from surprise to astonishment to utter elation and limitless affection for her. Once he finished, of all the things she expected him to say, he asked her a question: "Did you read that letter I left you? " "Um...no," Sharon said, slightly guiltily. But to her amazement, her response seemed to make him even happier than he'd been all of last night and this morning. This is how Sharon's letter went :
Dear Swayam,
I know I told you I don't care about you. But I came here looking for someone I don't just care about, but pretty much live by. And that's something I only really understood when that someone walked away from me and flew all the way to Stockholm, leaving me in this blank of a life that I couldn;t make sense of any more. But coming here has made me realise just how much you love me, and if you never want to see me again, it's nobody' fault but mine. I've given you so much pain that maybe it's right for you to stay away from me. Maybe you'll be happy that way. I promise you, I'll never bother you again. It's just that I couldn't leave without letting you know. I just wanted to tell you once, that I really truly love you Swayam Shekhawat. Thank you for bringing me out of the illusion I've been living under, that I will never be loved by anyone the way I've always dreamt of being loved one day. Thank you for loving me the way you do. I hope you'll forgive me someday, and consider me a friend. I'll never stop loving you, and you will be in my heart till my last breath. Because after being loved by you, I can never be the same.
Sharon.
Phew. There. It's RIDICULOUSLY long, I know. SORRY! Someone do the honours of continuing, please. If you're all still alive after having read through that mammoth of an update, that is. 😛
Edited by nandinidev - 13 years ago
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