You have inspired me ...
A heavenly reporter once asked Dharma what her first law should have been after becoming queen. Dharma was in the Family Quarters for Public Appearance during this session, surrounded by her love-hate family members (it was a complicated relationship). It was some 800 years after the death of Ashok, and the entire Mauryans were in heaven enjoying in their youthful forms. Ashok and his brothers were but kids, and Bindusar and his wives were bubbling with excitement for not only getting to see their kids again, but to enjoy the art of love-making in a more heavenly style without protection because of the advent of condoms.
"Well, Saran," Dharma started off nicely, "my first rule is to abolish the Raja Vidyala system."
The kids looked at each other and happily high-fived each other.
"Is there a reason for this Rani Dharma?"
"Well, my own son Ashok (that's him right there), also attended that school too."
Ashok looked down sheepishly.
"And look how he turned out. The stupid boy grew up and started to kill people."
Ashok looked up in shock. As cameras zoomed in on his face, he raised his hands to hide his face.
"Maaa." He groaned.
"Shush." Charumitra said firmly. She had grown accustomed to Dharma after experimenting on their own in heaven. She no longer bared hatred towards the favorite queen of BIndusar, but was rather happy that she finally got some time to herself, instead of faking her enjoyment with Bindusar.
"Thank you darling Charu," Dharma said, causing Charu to burn a shade of dark red.
"An-an-anything for you dear." Charu managed to reply back.
"Hmm, now what was I saying. Oh that's right, Raja Vidyala. So instead of going to the Raja Vidyala where you learn silly things, where you learn how to fight, I think me becoming the Guru of the family and teaching my wisdom would have been the best thing to do. This way, Sushim and Ashok would never fight for the throne, Siamak could grow some balls, Bindusar wouldn't act like the brainless twit that he is, and the queens and I could finally sit back and relax without being threatened by the likes of Helena and Seleucus Nikator and Justin."
Noor's nostrils flared at the mention of Justin; her eyebrows curving like a bow.
"But Rani Dharma," she said emphatically. "Surely you cannot believe Justin was behind all that crime."
"Of course not, and had I been there, instead of running away from your father Mir, I would have made sure Bindusar did not give Justin the punishment because anyone with a brain would know that the guy was only covering up for someone. And killing him was the stupidest thing to do."
Bindusar cleared his throat. "But Rani Dharma, Justin admitted himself, I had no other option but to follow through."
Dharma leaned back and let out a loud laugh. "Please. Vahrehmir knew the identity, he kept looking at Helena. And then Justin killed him. Why would Vahrehmir be looking at Helena if Justin was the one who told him these plans? I mean, what do you do in court Samrat? Just zone out until the time comes to impart some half-assed justice. I mean for fork's sake, you doubted me - the one you forcibly named Dharma because of my dharma - because some old hag and the wife of a traitor told you too."
Bindusar looked down. He couldn't say anything. "Why are you so mean ..." he mumbled to himself.
Subhrasi, who was sitting patiently next to Bindusar looked up and said, "What did you say Samrat, why are you mumbling to yourself?"
Bindusar looked at Subhrasi, who smiled happily, and shook his head. His eyes carefully focused on Dharma who was busy talking to the boys, in fear of the consequences if she knew what he had said.
"That does it," Dharma yelled, standing up. Her ears had been honed over the ears and Bindusar's mumbles were loud and clear for her.
"I give advice and people don't like it. I make rules and people (she pauses and gives a deep look towards Bindusar) still don't like. Screw this all, I'm just going to be a servant again. Life was more peaceful without this silly crown." She yanked the crown off her head and threw it at Bindusar's feet. "Go put this crown on someone else's head." and she stormed off.
Bindusar picked up the crown and looked around the room. This was the crown of the MahaMahaRani - she who held the position of being the most close and the most favorite of the Samrat. He looked Charumitra, who stared longingly as Dharma faded away. He looked at Noor, who was kissing a hologram of Justin from Hell, and he looked at Subhrasi who randomly started to giggle.
He sighed and walked towards the window and peered out towards the vast realm of Swarga. The chum-chuming of anklets shook his heart as he glanced at that direction. There, the gorgeous of all Apsaras, Urvashi, stood. She beckoned him with his hands and Bindusar obeyed mindlessly.
As Bindusar reached out to put the crown of Urvashi's head, a sharp yank of his ear made him drop the crown. Turning to see who dared disturb his moment, he let out a sharp shrill. Charu, Noor, and Subhrasi stood there.
"Four wives weren't enough that you want another one." Charu said.
Noor whispered something in Urvashi's ears, and she looked up and down Bindusar and left after making a disgusted face.
"What- What did you tell her?"
"Something all your wives, and only your wives know. We figured if she was going to be your wife, she might as well know your biggest, erm should I say your smallest secret." Subhrasi said. The three queens exchanged laughs.
"What does that mean?" Bindu said confused.
A thaali dropped to the ground and all looked in that direction. It was Dharma, who had changed her outfit to that of a dasi. As she eavesdropped, she accidentally dropped the thaali, making her appearance well known.
"Screw this dasi act. I want to have some fun." And she walked up to Bindusar, kneed him hard in the groin, caught his chin as he leaned forward, and gave him a hard kiss.
"That ladies is how you do things Rani style."
THE END.
Err this turned out to be more random than I thought it would be lol.
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
Advocate Anjali Awasthi
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