Shiv is a criminal...isnt it?

this is what i feel is the current wave of thinking...Shiv is great only till he is all lovey dovey and supportive to his wife. Dare his thoughts dont match hers or he doesnt support her and he is a criminal!!

And let me clear my stand...I am an AnSh fan. this post is not to bash anandi or to glorify Shiv. Its just to bring out some of my thoughts ...so bashers of either charecter, or the pair or the actors please stay away.

Let's see what Shiv has done for Anandi till date:
- he loved anandi unconditionally and married her on her insistance...because she begged him and that too to keep her mother's promise. Else he never wanted to force her.
- supported her fully in every possible way to overcome her trauma and start a fresh life
- took the torture during J amnesia track, when anandi was taking care of her lost husband...and didnt even reveal the truth just to save everyone and specially anandi from guilt and pain.
- bailed out J during the railway track even after what he did to Shiv, only to make his lady love and her family happy
- tolerated post wedding drama of anandi, gave her time, understanding and patience - which husband or even wife does that?
- went to fetch J again during the pag phera drama - again for his love's peace of mind.
- fully trusted anandi when it came to J, i dont think any husband would really tolerate such friendship of his wife and her ex, but Shiv does and we love him for that. It teaches us to keep complete faith in our partner and you would never be disappointed.
- gave up anandi for sake of J thinking that her happiness also lies in it. or was he selfish here?
- stood for her during UD fiasco, but then when he shouted at his mom, people went saying that he was too harsh...so what we really want?
- helped her realize her NGO dream and supported her even when his mom went ballastic for all the danger this noble cause brought with it.

Now let's see what Anandi has done for Shiv till date:
- put up with Ira and her illogical thinking.
- tolerated Sanchi to every possible extent.
- i cannot think of more, friends you are welcome to add, maybe i donot remember them.

now punching bag - that is what he is making Anandi now, isnt it? but if i go by above reasons who has been the punching bag for whom? and who should be now complaining? i think NO ONE!

that is what happened in J-A marriage, and hence it failed. but here the marriage is of equals - and equal on every level - be it personal, professional, mental or emotional.

every time only one person cannot be sane...its a give and take relation...till now Shiv has given enough support to anandi in every possible way, he has time and again proved his love, faith and support for anandi ,

Shiv is not angry with Anandi ...he is more upset with himself and that he trusted J so blindly...he is not taunting anandi or putting her down reminding her of her past. but he is reliving her pain thorugh this fiasco...he is imagining anandi and her painful journey of all those years when J dumped her the same way as he did to Sanchi. He is seeing his sister going thru the same hell and hence all this anger and frustration.

he is not able to forgive himself as well for all this mess and its just that he is venting it out on his wife...but isnt that what we all do? if not then either we are abnormal (as in demiGods) or Shiv is ...cause its impossible to remain thoroughtout your life calm, composed and rational come what may...

Er ...why are 'we' normal when we vent out on wives and abnormal when we don't ? Uninterested in bashing , merely curious about this line . Not even sarcastic .

Originally posted by: rdjha

this is what i feel is the current wave of thinking...Shiv is great only till he is all lovey dovey and supportive to his wife. Dare his thoughts dont match hers or he doesnt support her and he is a criminal!!

And let me clear my stand...I am an AnSh fan. this post is not to bash anandi or to glorify Shiv. Its just to bring out some of my thoughts ...so bashers of either charecter, or the pair or the actors please stay away.

Let's see what Shiv has done for Anandi till date:
- he loved anandi unconditionally and married her on her insistance...because she begged him and that too to keep her mother's promise. Else he never wanted to force her.
- supported her fully in every possible way to overcome her trauma and start a fresh life
- took the torture during J amnesia track, when anandi was taking care of her lost husband...and didnt even reveal the truth just to save everyone and specially anandi from guilt and pain.
- bailed out J during the railway track even after what he did to Shiv, only to make his lady love and her family happy
- tolerated post wedding drama of anandi, gave her time, understanding and patience - which husband or even wife does that?
- went to fetch J again during the pag phera drama - again for his love's peace of mind.
- fully trusted anandi when it came to J, i dont think any husband would really tolerate such friendship of his wife and her ex, but Shiv does and we love him for that. It teaches us to keep complete faith in our partner and you would never be disappointed.
- gave up anandi for sake of J thinking that her happiness also lies in it. or was he selfish here?
- stood for her during UD fiasco, but then when he shouted at his mom, people went saying that he was too harsh...so what we really want?
- helped her realize her NGO dream and supported her even when his mom went ballastic for all the danger this noble cause brought with it.

Now let's see what Anandi has done for Shiv till date:
- put up with Ira and her illogical thinking.
- tolerated Sanchi to every possible extent.
- i cannot think of more, friends you are welcome to add, maybe i donot remember them.

now punching bag - that is what he is making Anandi now, isnt it? but if i go by above reasons who has been the punching bag for whom? and who should be now complaining? i think NO ONE!

because a husband and wife relation is such...sometimes you are the punching bag while other times you are the support system. a husband and wife relation is a 2 way thing...only one person giving and other receiving never works.

that is what happened in J-A marriage, and hence it failed. but here the marriage is of equals - and equal on every level - be it personal, professional, mental or emotional.

every time only one person cannot be sane...its a give and take relation...till now Shiv has given enough support to anandi in every possible way, he has time and again proved his love, faith and support for anandi ,

now its her turn to understand his pain and support him...and slowly help him come out of it and then show the truth. Till she brings him out of this distress...he will not be able to see the truth. and this only anandi can do. She now has to be his support system.

Shiv is not angry with Anandi ...he is more upset with himself and that he trusted J so blindly...he is not taunting anandi or putting her down reminding her of her past. but he is reliving her pain thorugh this fiasco...he is imagining anandi and her painful journey of all those years when J dumped her the same way as he did to Sanchi. He is seeing his sister going thru the same hell and hence all this anger and frustration.

and please i am not comparing Sanchi to anandi, i would never do that. Its just the way J did everything, that has somehow given a clean chit to the nasty Sanchi.

this time though Jagya being correct in his decision and choice of life partner he executed everything in an extremely wrong way. that is the reason that Shiv now thinks that J never changed, the faith he invested in J was proved wrong, this is more frustrating for him.

he is not able to forgive himself as well for all this mess and its just that he is venting it out on his wife...but isnt that what we all do? if not then either we are abnormal or Shiv is ...

shiv is wrong right now but that does not mean shiv love affection toward anandi has been forgotten

@ TM, agree with you.

Blaming Jagya he has executed things in extremely wrong way does not give a clean chit to Shiv to behave so wrongly Its Jagya 's life in whatever he executes his life even he has his reasons to do what he did After breaking the alliance with Sanchi he can do anything so you cannot term him extremely wrong to prove Shiv right but the issue with Shiv is He is extremely blinded in sister's love Today he was remembering all love confessions of his sister but he does not have even one memory of Jagya getting close to Sanchi anywhere So many times he saw them together reason he himself knows Jagya never loved her so when he could never love never even touched her all the while , decently broke the alliance without saying a word against Sanchi Shiv is calling him bad names and he is being so angry , shouting , even want to murder Jagya i guess the way he said to Anandi i only left him because he belongs to your mayka on which basis he is doing so ?Thousands engagements broke because of compatibility reasons and people marry some other persons only idiots like Shekhars do so much hungama of it

TM i also do agree with you.👍🏼

I thinks the above points are clearly listed and I agree that there should be understanding in a married life.
But did Shiv go thro' this scenario where he is being questioned by Singhs? No

I don't think Singhs would dare point finger at Shiv even if he is completely wrong or any of his family members because Shiv is SIL right?

Especially Anandi who is the new bahu in the family, imagine how terrible she would feel with all that is happening around and she being questioned and everybody pointing fingers at her. Shiv is the only person she can shoulder on to but he is not seeing this.

I can for sure say that any husband like Shiv however angry he might be, but in their private time would first say please do not mistake us for being angry, we/ I am not angry with you but trying to understand where did we/I go wrong in judging J.

I guess over time when the couple has been married for more than 10 years or so ( I think I am reasonable with this number) they can take each other for granted and have any arguments or what ever.

Yes its just a bad phase which will pass on!

Originally posted by: paljay

@ TM, agree with you.

But I am just curious, if Shiv does something wrong, still we should say he is right?

I know he is not a criminal but today what he said to Anandi is wrong. He is great human being and a good husband but today he was wrong.