We seem to be polarised between the choices and chosen ignorances of the leads … let us dissect and derive things as to how they were, and how they are… we don’t know if it will hold up in future for cv’s … but it is what it is as of now!
1. Priya’s tanas are daily used-to things now, for Ram at least,
So if she is trying to put up her point, he is being dismissive to her validity of cognitive ability of deferentiation of good and bad. Just how his family’s females are towards him.. his sister,who genuinely is a bit airy and his mother, who just says “jaise tum chaaho” the exact moment he reaches the conclusion that she wants him to reach or when it is convenient to her.
2. There is also traction of bullshit narrative(partly being fed to him by his so-called family) that he is forming of her and thier circumstances. This is one of the manipulation techniques used by subtle narcissists
—that you love us, so you are doing this…
— you help your people,so you’re helping us…
—you are emotionally raw, you can’t think rationally, so, I will think it for you and tell you what you should be thinking(vedu did this recently)
….they gaslight you into thinking that you think what they want you to think 🧐
..okay, psychology class khatam! 🙈🧠
3. So for ram to come out of this gutter of manipulation, he needs to follow Priya and stay at his sasural or dadi ka ghar or chidiya ghar /or literally anywhere but km and distant from km vaasiyon …
Why? he seems to be at ease and interacts in natural element of ‘when I am here,no fear,I will adjust but I am here’ with his in laws because they are not manipulative and they haven’t seen such a pillar of support through some tricky situations.
4. His words are never dismissed or minimised… just reciprocated and engaged with… which Priya’s mother is doing in case of ram.
She has entertained a narcissist and a sociopath for so long that her immediate reaction to adverse circumstances is to say “sorry” hath jod ke🙏🙈 .. Doesn’t it remind you of old gen femalelead’s the oversanskaari overvictimised bahu who is insufferable 😣 and her only hope of rescue is her good karma? 😳 and she had to “prove” always…
5. All through this, she says and acts in support of her daughters actions even when she doesn’t agree with it, but definitely is honest in expressing it and making them see her point. “Aise nahi karte bachi …”and stuff.. also has raised 4-5 theek -thaak self reliant and morally rooted children in her household…. it is such a brave and appreciative feat for single mother.👍👏
6. If she has a misconception/nil concept ..she expresses and asks about it and she gets a full on explanation from her daughters… except mythri, who for what god un-beknowst reason married a guy like Neeraj,who honestly ..even if not priya’s ex is despicable (probably Sood women at that point had a complex of attracting narcissistic men?no offence to Aman,the actor though..he is evoking perfect hatred from the fandom👍)
7. She is not afraid to call a spade a spade to her daughter, or even her in laws and the rest of her family…she doesn’t hesitate to question ram (in annulment situation) and doesn’t backdown on giving him monologues, that as kids we find a little ott from our own parents , probably she didn’t need to do so for her daughters… but for sons.. these things need to be said and counselled from time to time…
Finally,
8. There is a major reason.. why many of us are back into this show..
Priya is fine with putting her point across, though uncomfortable to the opposite person. And is willing to be uncomfortable for her people…
9. It is Just that, she has developed feelings for ram, and therefore may be ,just a little, has lost her ability to make him uncomfortable to the point he just shuts up and listens.😬🤭..the way he used to be at the start😂
10. We are liking Priya,coz she is that pragmatic and independent woman who is among us! 😃
11. We are even feeling bad because she is not being given importance🙈😂 by her own family in the presence of ram.. we are feeling jealous and unimpressed with this kind of development…as if we are priya’s bodyguards or something😅
12. Priya had been the khaide dekhne wali pillar for so long for soods and went quite opposite to her mother in terms of social expectations from a woman…but she is not just independent, but individualistic too, not a brain bent by conditioning of devi-daasi extremes😵💫 of being a woman.
13. Right now she is irritated when she is given less importance as compared to the newly arrived daamaad… which is true, but she knows 100% their intentions were never wrong towards her… 🙂
But at the drop of hat , she can have her family summoned, if at all something needs to be done, they will have her back just like she has theirs…🤩 remember shikki’s wedding?sid-shivi issue? Pre nup issue? Literally all their problems are their problems…even when Priya talks about her problems with them so freely, then ram would be jealous as a mad hatter “ye meri biwi mere se problems share nahi Karti”🤩
14. Through hell and highwater, Neeraj and her sister kaand to her father not appreciating them and his family making them extremely emotionally hurt for no mistake of their own… all through this overt narcissistic trauma, these people stuck together in rejoice and remorse. And they know their boundaries even if the opposite party oversteps it.. they constantly disengage , feel bad, handle themselves and circumstances and get on with their own life…. No expectations and explanations needed from toxic people!
15. At this point, what I see is that priya&soods have stood to overt manipulation and championed their own lives(at least for now, that guy can butt in if ram is not in the equation, coz right now he is a poltroon of priya and ram’s abandon when it comes to protecting their own) and here is Ram ,who is yet to even identify it!
It will be an interesting to see how these two will sort things without being co-dependant(a toxic form of dependency that can potentially off track each other’s identity and growth)… but interdependent!
16. So final point is… the pov’s of both leads are shaped up by their circumstances but what we are unable to supersede is the fact that the very obvious clues, are not being picked up by our mahaan dhakkans !🤪
And are constantly at butting their heads in tu tu me me… when they know it is about “hum”.
The fact they are minimising themselves is what is triggering all of us..😮💨 Phew…
finally! Done with such a big one ☝️ Do let me know what you think!
