Hi Guys, I am back with another OS. To be very honest, this is a bit different from what I have written till now. So I hope, you all like it.
Let me know how you find it. Do leave comments and suggestions ❤️
Tere Dil Mein Meri Saanson Ko Panah Mil Jaaye
Tere Ishq Mein Meri Jaan Fanaa Ho Jaaye
- Fanaa
As he woke up in the middle of the night, he found that he was drenched in sweat. With his breathing labored and heartbeats thundering, he was gasping for air.
Getting his harsh breathing under control, he turned his head around to look for his glasses. Once he had found those, he took in the view of his living room. He was yet to get used to this new house of his. As he fumbled while switching on his mobile torch, he accidentally hit the night lamp besides which the mobile was kept and the lamp landed on the floor with a loud thud piercing the eerie silence of the night. He immediately reached for the lamp and readjusted it in its original position, careful enough to avoid making any noise again.
Tiptoeing across the hall, he went to the bedroom and opened the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to disturb her sleep. The view brought a smile on his face as he noticed Anu sleeping peacefully on his bed. He thanked the stars as he realized that the noise outside hadn't woken her up. She had been exhausted today, he remembered. But it had been worth it. The happiness and the excitement she felt on celebrating her birthday first time after 26 years was worth every damn thing. It was contagious.
However, for the first time in his life, he regretted having her under the same roof as him, with no other company other than his thoughts, which were a whirlwind of emotions right now.
For a moment, he thought he shouldn't have offered her his house to stay for the night when they had returned from her birthday party.
She had realized that, in her excitement, she had forgotten to take her keys while leaving for the Shah house in the evening. She had suggested calling Samar for the spare key and he should have just listened to her.
But, damn... he had to think about everybody's comfort!! God, her company was rubbing off on him and the emotional fool that he was, he had dissuaded her from the idea of disturbing Samar so late in the night. The poor chap must be tired, he had thought.
He was thankful that the stray dog on the streets barked loudly, breaking his reverie. Else, he might have done something perhaps irrevocably damaging.
He slowly made his way out of the room and within no time, he was in the bathroom stripping off his nightclothes and setting them aside carefully.
Standing under the cold water of the shower, he stood near the wall, bent his head, and closed his eyes. The flashes of the images he saw in his dream came crashing on him once again.
God, he couldn't believe it, he dreamed of her tonight! It was not just any dream - it was a dream of them. He dreamt they were making love, in the same room and on the same bed where she was sleeping peacefully right now
.
He remembered how he was shocked beyond his wits when Anu had wrapped her arms around him today after she had poured her heart out to him. He had yearned for this moment for almost half his life and it felt magical when it had transpired into reality. Yet, in hindsight, it had proved to be the source of his torment. Because now, he was more intimate with the curves of her body, knew the way she feels in his arms, was more aware of her effect on him.
For the past 26 years, he had cautiously maintained his distance from the most dreaded zone - Hopes and dreams. But now that he had crossed that threshold, it had done irrevocable damage to his heart.
Yes, he had been in love with her ever since he had laid eyes on her for the first time, but things were easier when he didn't have any hopes, when he was blissfully unaware of the fact that she might one day enter his life and reciprocate his feelings. For the past 26 years, he had been in love with the Anupama that existed in his memory. However, now that she had actually become an integral part of his life, he had had an opportunity to get to know her from up close, and ever since, he had been falling in love with her a little more, every day. Her loving heart, her selfless nature, everything reminded him of his mother and he couldn't help but fall for her harder.
He didn't know how to deal with the raw emotions that this woman has evoked in him. If it were only physical attraction at work here, he would not have been this tormented, conflicted right now. However, it was not the case with her. She appeals to him on every level there is - she was everything he had ever wanted and more.
He had encountered many girls in the last 26 years when he was in the US, some of them were prettier than her, some of them were smarter than her, yet none of them were quite like her. He had been honest with Devika when he had confessed that the people who aim for the moon don't settle on the stars. If anyone was to ever ask him why he loves her so much or what does he love about her, he wouldn't be able to answer that, he knew. How is one supposed to answer, why he breathes air? Yes, loving her was like breathing air to him. He simply did it, not knowing how; not knowing why.
No woman has drawn him, the way she did and although she knew that he loved her, he wasn't quite sure if she understood the depth of his feelings, the extent of his love for her. He remembered how he had been on cloud nine when she had professed her love and confessed that she wanted to marry him. He had barely managed to hold himself from kissing her insane. Yet, he had managed to reign in his passion and desires, for he knew that she might not be comfortable. The abusive past of 26 years had scarred her deeply and she would need time to heal completely.
And he was ready to take things slow, he was ready to give her all the time in the world that she needed. But his heart and his body were deceiving him. However good of a man he tried to be, he was a man after all. A man who was madly, insanely in love with the woman who was soon going to be his wife. She had lovingly given him every right over her, yet he wasn't sure how much of it he can actually exercise. He had claimed her heart but he didn't know if he would ever be able to claim her completely. Not that it changed their equation in any way, yet he had always been longed to belong. He had always longed for the feeling of being one with someone. Of course, he hadn't been a virgin his entire life, pining for her, but he had always craved the emotional intimacy with every girl that he had slept with. It had always either been the obvious next step into the relationship or just an impulsive outburst of his manly desires in case of his one-night stands. Never, for once, he had felt emotionally connected with his partner. He has had sex with them but he wanted to make love with Anu.
However, he very well understood Anupama's hesitation and apprehensions. He knew where she came from. And he never wanted to be a reason for her misery or her discomfort. So, he decided he will give her space and time, as he always has.
The only thing he had to do in the meanwhile is to stay on guard, remain cautious when around her, and act normal while at it. She must not get the slightest idea of what all he has going on in his mind.
Wiping his wet body, he once again changed into the nightclothes he had left discarded.
Before going to bed, he decided on getting a glass of water and hence headed to the kitchen. After having the drink, he closed the door of the fridge and turned around only to collide with her.
Things will never be easy for him will they be?
Of course not his mind replied.
How can they be when things never seem to go his way, he had planned mere moments ago to maintain distance from her and now she was in his arms! To stop her fall he had reflexively acted and held onto her waist tightly and pulled her in, while her arms grabbed his shoulders tightly so as to not lose her balance.
Devoid of any makeup, with her long tresses open, she was a sight to behold. His hand moved on its own accord to tuck the strand of hair, which was playing mischievously with her cheek, behind her ear.
His sudden proximity was playing havoc with her senses. Deciding to put some distance between them, she cleared her throat and loosened her grip on his shoulders. In the next instant, he pulled back his hands from her waist and looked away, before his eyes could betray him.
"Sorry, I didn't see you coming", he said, still not meeting her gaze.
"I came here to check on you", the words left him flabbergasted. Had she, somehow, managed to read his mind. Was she aware of the reason for him being out of his bed at this odd hour.
"Check on me? Why?", he said and pretended to be nonchalant. But deep down, he was worried if she knew of his activities.
"When I came to refill my water bottle, I found that you were out of your bed. Later, I heard the sound of running water and thought that you must have had nature's call. But when the bathroom light was on for a long time, I got worried. Are you okay?", as she completed, he couldn't help but feel a little giddy and happy that she was so concerned for him. He found it very endearing.
If he was being honest with himself, he was far from being okay. But, she must not get a hint of it. He did not have any idea how to explain himself, his predicament to her, least of all the source of it. The best way to go about it was to divert her attention.
"Behaving like a wife already, are you now?", he asked teasingly and with a glint of mischief in his eyes, he advanced towards her as she backed off, her face having an adorable confused look. Before she knew it, her back collided with the platform on the kitchen and as soon as that happened, he closed in on her. His arms snaked around her and he placed them on the granite.
The man standing before her, the man she had fallen in love with like never before, was messing up with her heart big time, she thought. She had been married for 26 years and birthed 3 children, yet she had never felt this tingling sensation ever before with her ex-husband. Act of copulation had always been a mere marital duty for her, never had it been an expression of love or desire. But, with this irresistibly charming man whom she was soon going to wed, she had discovered an unknown side of her, she had been acquainted with the hidden desires which she never knew existed within her.
He had a knack of making her go weak in the knees with that piercing gaze of his. And today, she hadn't been able to hold herself back as she had hugged him. She could still feel the warmth that had engulfed her when she had found her safe haven in his arms. His masculine scent was still playing with her senses.
Gaining control over her pounding heart and her lost voice, she decided to play along. She knew he won't judge her. That was the thing she loved the most about him. The fact that she could be herself around him without the fear of being judged. She was certain that whether she reciprocates his advances or she rejects them politely, he will respect it and nothing would change between them and it gave her a sense of security, contentment.
"What if I am? Well, as the saying goes, practice makes the man perfect!! So just trying to get into the role of being your wife", the words had his jaw dropped and he looked at her, with his mouth open in astonishment.
Her reply had him stumped momentarily. However, the changes in her demeanor and the deep blush that adorned her cheeks encouraged him to nudge her further. Quickly rearranging his expressions, he leaned in close to her, their faces inches apart, his eyes carrying an unseen look in them, one that seemed almost feral to her. She couldn't help but find she was sweating, her heart was thundering once again, her pulse rapid and she looked down.
With the gentlest of touch, he placed a finger under her chin and made her look him in his eyes,
"Well, in that case, we need to practice a lot of other things as well."
As she processed his suggestive remark, her eyes widened in surprise. Not because she felt offended but because she had never seen this side of Anuj Kapadia. He had always supported her, motivated her, but never had he claimed any right on her. Never had he, in any way, manifested that he desires her, like a man desires a woman.
Her heart fluttered as she mulled over his words. Because, despite knowing that he loves her insanely, she had been always apprehensive about her physical appearance. He had never given her any reason to feel that way, yet she knew she was simple and plain looking compared to him. Plus, she had never been desired by anyone physically, not even her ex-husband.
To be honest, she herself wasn't sure where she wanted to stand with him in terms of physical intimacy. Her emotions were a mess. But, one thing was certain, she wanted this man, in every way possible and more. How and when things should progress, she decided to let her Kanhaji take that call. In the meanwhile, she wanted to just go with the flow and listen to her heart.
Eyes twinkling mischievously, she raised herself on her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck. The adorable grin on his face was making things difficult for her.
"Ahhhh, You have a point there Mr Kapadia. How about we start from the basics?", she smirked and placed a chaste kiss on his cheek.
He had never been so shocked in his whole life. He was barely holding on to his self-control and she was upping the stakes. Moreover, that flimsy material of her saree wasn't helping things either.
Realizing that he would again need a cold shower if he stands there like this, he finally backed off and created some distance between them.
Basking in the glory of their blissful escapade, she finally bid him a Good night and turned to make her way to the bedroom, while he stands there, still rooted to the spot, looking at her retreating figure.
Something though did not sit right with her and after some time, once she had made sure that he was back in his bed, she headed to the bathroom to confirm her doubts.
Her queries were answered when she noticed the wet floor and then touched the wet towel by the sink.
So it had not been her mistake, she had smelled fresh soap on his skin.
On checking the geyser, she found it cool to touch and her eyes widened as she connected the dots.
He had taken a cold shower in the middle of the night.
She somehow managed to make it back to the room and crashed on the bed, exhilaration pulsing through her veins.
Overcome by exhaustion, her mind and body lost the battle against sleep as her eyes closed after a while, only for him to invade her dreams, their encounter in the kitchen replayed on her mind, only with a slight change in things. In her dreams, when she placed a kiss on his cheek, he reciprocated it by claiming her lips and later, carried her back to the room in his arms. He gently placed her on the bed and sank into her loving embrace.
So, did you like it guys? Please give feedback😊
Love you all❤️
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