Today I felt bad for Vanraj - Page 2

Originally posted by: vismaya

I SECOND YOUR VIEW

Does a good dad differentiate between his children,does a good dad call his son names like Nachaniya,loser etc?Vanraj has been a horrible dad to Samar.He has been only nice to him when he needed help from him like to make him on his side after affair revelation,when his accident happened and when his job went away and he wanted a place for his cafe.The moment his works are done,he is back to his self.Have we got a single scene before affair revelation,Vanraj pampering Samar like he does for Toshu and Pakhi?Let alone pampering, he hasn't even spent time with him pr even talked to him in a normal tone.Samar yearned for Father's love which he never got and probably he is seeing a father figure in Anuj and that's why he is getting closer to him.And whenever Samar talks against Vanraj,he says Baap se baat karne ki Tameez hi nahi hai,he thinks he deserves so much respect, then why did he not teach Maa aur Bhai se baat karne ki Tameez to his ladle bacche when they insulted Anupama and Samar and called them losers?

A parent must not play politics in the family. By glorifying P1 he constantly made Samar feel in adequate and unloved. Samar has always stood up for his mom and decided to snap his ties with Mr Shah when the EMA was revealed.

Like Anupama he is genuinely caring be it his grand parents, mama buddy siblings , kinjal or any other person he interacts with. He has never shown disrespect except when they insult his mother.

Samar wanted to see his mom happy give her her due... When Anuj makes the effort to show his care he definitely becomes his role model.... Grounded and warm.

I have absolutely no sympathy for Vanraj who is such a bad influence both at home and the work place.

As someone mentioned he was acting like a goon and if he goes to Mumbai as spoilers say he deserves absolutely no respect.

Originally posted by: janaki17789

I think what I am going to say may sound wierd but today I felt bad for Vanraj. OK he is a horrible husband. But at some point he was a good dad and son. He still is a good dad to all his kids. When all his son, daughter, and daughter in law were praising Anuj he felt lacking. He knows his one mistake has caused a rift in all his realations. And he lost all respect,love and very important(anupama) support system. He is knows yet doesn't realize that he also need to stop. Right now what he is trying is a desperate attempt to become Anupama champion. But his methods are wrong and toxic.

I am sorry but did you say "one mistake"?

How exactly is cheating on your wife for 8 yrs a mistake? Did he ended up in kavya's bed because he tripped on his own massive ego head?

I have no idea what "good" father or son you are talking about.

He was never a good father like almost everyone has already pointed out here.

Not only was he a TERRIBLE father to samar but he actually stood aside and didnt participate in his favorite toshu's wedding.

He was not willing to keep toshu's happiness above his ego when paritosh wanted to marry kinjal.

What kind of a "good" father pampers his daughter to the point of spoiling her rotten, calls his son a loser and "nachaniya" and then misses his other son's wedding because his mistress wanted to be a part of the wedding too and wouldnt allow him to attend the wedding without her.

Have we forgotten that his mistress sent his son (samar) to jail and he wasnt able to do sh*t about it?

I pray to god no one ever gets a "good" father like vanraj.

And what "feeling left out"?

Pakhi had REPLACED her mother with kavya in her school competition that was CLEARLY about mothers. And everyone was angry on anupama for that?

He and his banshee of a mistress deliberately delayed pakhi on her birthday soo all of anupama's hard work will go waste?

His three kids would have turned out better if he was an absent father. His upbringing has messed them up BIG time.

He feels left out because his kids and daughter in law praised another man? Soo then he will feel left out too when someone in his family praises mr. Modi as the PM of our country?

I am sorry i am just not able to digest how you are willing to try to appease his ego and think his bruised ego is a valid enough reason for him to be an absolute a*s to everyone.

I would have felt sympathy for him had something wrong even happened to him. NOTHING and NOONE is even punishing him for what he has done. He has still got a house and his entire family talking to him normally and no one rubs his adultery in his face.

Just because he is habitual to ordering anupama around and treating her like dirt and isnt able to do that now doesnt mean he is being ounished or something awful is happening to him. He shouldnt have been able to do that right from the start.

As for him wanting to be anupama's "champion" all of that sounds like fancy hocus pocus to me to justify his misogynist egoistic chauvinist behavior and nothing more than that.

He was her champion for the last 25 yrs wasnt he? And what did he do with that? Threw it all away to satisfy his lust with his banshee mistress.

No one will keep handing out a kohinoor in your hands when they know you dont even have the capability to handle and take care of it.

have no sympathy for vanraj,. He is selfish egoistic and mentally ill person,he has everything ,still want more like he had kavya but still want Anupama( as a maid) . Vanraj is a horrible father , Father means head of the family, he should be like that who appreciate his children whether he is successful or unsuccessful.

Exactly!And Vanraj should remember what his favourite Toshu did when his engagement was broken(throwing tantrums),and what Samar did(waited for Vanraj's aashirvaad,which accordingtome was not required because even now he has not acceptedNandini wholeheartedly).He should remember what Vanraj did when his kids called Samar loser(along with them even he called them loser)and what Samar did when his(Vanraj)wife herself called Vanraj loser(Samar stood up for him)

And even after all this Vanraj has the audacity to call him Maa ka chamcha and bigda hua beta.

Honestly, I cannot feel sad for Vanraj.

A good father isn't what I'd describe Vanraj as. A good son isn't what I would describe Vanraj as.

A child, especially a girl child, will never thrive in a family where her father insults her mother. As a child, they may not recognize it but as they grow up, they might start to recognize how insulting and misogynistic Vanraj is. This misogynistic behavior isn't something a daughter will appreciate from her father.

I can't talk about Pakhi because she's more like Toshu. They leap left and right as per their convenience.

A good father wouldn't call his son a 'nachaniya' just because he has a passion for dance and wants to be a dancer and choreographer.

A good son is one who can try and understand his parents' point of view. Vanraj as a son fails when he does not deliver the expectation of Baapuji. Which to be fair is low enough as itself but it shows that Vanraj and his standards are quite low.

Anupama is used to their standards, their ideologies and their point of view. The fact that there is a whole new world of what she isn't exposed to is where she fails. She truly fails to understand what kind of environment she lives in.

A sane-minded normal girl would never sustain her mental stability in that house. Vanraj's hypocrisy is surely needed to call out. He fights for his sister if she is harassed and get angry at Anupama for reprimanding Pakhi on her problematic behavior but he himself has no respect for Anupama. At least I wouldn't be able to deal with a father of Vanraj's kind. Probably have a lot of self-worth issues. Because the first thing a girl looks up to while growing up is her mother. What her mother goes through is imprinted on her mind. A girl who has a father like Vanraj (pointing to the fact that he has had an affair for 8 years while being a husband to her mother) would surely point to trust issues. Vanraj constantly poking Anupama for everything she does (assume that she admired what Anupama has done and Vanraj taunts her for the same) will build confidence issues because that stems from how Vanraj treats Anupama. Every girl looks up to her future husband's relationship with her in the same way that her parents have it. Vanraj's problematic behavior is sure to make her assume that it is normal for a husband to be that toxic.

sympathy for V my foot🤣

This word doesnot exist in my dictionary for Vanya.

he is getting taste of his own medicine. This is how Karma works .

Originally posted by: janaki17789

I think what I am going to say may sound wierd but today I felt bad for Vanraj. OK he is a horrible husband. But at some point he was a good dad and son. He still is a good dad to all his kids. When all his son, daughter, and daughter in law were praising Anuj he felt lacking. He knows his one mistake has caused a rift in all his realations. And he lost all respect,love and very important(anupama) support system. He is knows yet doesn't realize that he also need to stop. Right now what he is trying is a desperate attempt to become Anupama champion. But his methods are wrong and toxic.

He isn't a good day. By just providing kids doesn't mean he is a good dad. He never thot them any good morals. He disrespected their mom. He called his own son Samar a lover because he wanted to dance. A parent can never never call his own child lover go support other kid. IHe had spoilt Pakhi that she was constantly berating her mom. He was a terrible role example for P1.

I don't sympathize with him at all. He is just a self centered egoistic person. I don't think he even loves Kavya.

Now also he is not liking Anu and Anuj together not because he regrets that Anu is not in her life but he can't see her success. He just want to keep her as her slave

Originally posted by: janaki17789

I think what I am going to say may sound wierd but today I felt bad for Vanraj. OK he is a horrible husband. But at some point he was a good dad and son. He still is a good dad to all his kids. When all his son, daughter, and daughter in law were praising Anuj he felt lacking. He knows his one mistake has caused a rift in all his realations. And he lost all respect,love and very important(anupama) support system. He is knows yet doesn't realize that he also need to stop. Right now what he is trying is a desperate attempt to become Anupama champion. But his methods are wrong and toxic.

Sorry but this is a joke🤣Feeling bad for Vanraaj my foot😡

Originally posted by: janaki17789

I think what I am going to say may sound wierd but today I felt bad for Vanraj. OK he is a horrible husband. But at some point he was a good dad and son. He still is a good dad to all his kids. When all his son, daughter, and daughter in law were praising Anuj he felt lacking. He knows his one mistake has caused a rift in all his realations. And he lost all respect,love and very important(anupama) support system. He is knows yet doesn't realize that he also need to stop. Right now what he is trying is a desperate attempt to become Anupama champion. But his methods are wrong and toxic.

Seriously disagree with this, especially when they keep saying so on the show. Yes, he monetarily provided for his family in every he could and in some families that's what they have to dedicate their lives to do, so maybe they don't have as much time to spend raising their kids or quality time with the family and such. That's understandable. But we have seen Vanraj abuse, humiliate and oppress his wife regularly and degrade his own child so much. What kind of father does that? And what kind of parenting is it to the other two children who he did all this for and with? Look at what Toshu has become. How sick. Look at how he always behaved with Samar. Look at what he encouraged in Pakhi. Maybe he's a decent FIL to Kinjal, but if he doesn't check his son he's terrible at that duty as well. As for being a good son, look at all the shame and distress he brought upon his parents in their old age. And every time he insults Anupamaa's way of dressing, behaving, lack of education and knowledge of English it's an insult to his mother who holds the very same credentials. As for Bapuji, how many times in the earlier part of this show has he shut his father up when he tries to rein him in. Everything Toshu said to his family in his outbursts is a pure reflection of Vanraj's own disgust. Though his mother blames Anupamaa for everything under the son, the actual cause of all of her complaints and problems is her son only.

Apart from that, I can understand Vanraj's feelings unable to hear these praises about a "paraya mard" when he believes these compliments should be reserved for himself only. But how then are we supposed to feel about Anupamaa who heard Kavya's many praises for so many years and constantly being compared to her and degraded. Atleast no one in Vanraj's family is saying he needs to be like Anuj or comparing Anuj to him in any way. He just feels he should be the only man to be looked up to in this family. Even though they should, no one has actually compared him or put him down. But Anupamaa not only had to hear those insults and take them in a smiling manner, she had to discover that she got betrayed with that same person for all those very qualities and then has to live in the same house with both betrayers and then tolerate them trying to control her even now. We hear so much about Vanraj's one mistake that ended it all. What about all the many tortures over all those years. Before that "one mistake was uncovered" which lasted 8 years btw, he was quite a terrible person. His pain that he feels now is pain and what Anupamaa felt for nearly a decade was what then? He couldn't maintain any of his relationships properly at all. Maybe he's only a good brother to Dolly. That's all I can think of.