Two friends..Rajiv n Anuj..read it..Jokes..

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Rajesh

@set_raj

Inactive

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

😉Two friends😛Anuj n Rajiv😉.. Jokes 😆

Hello friends back again with some more jokes on Dumb and Dumber Anuj and Rajiv...your favourite characters..😆

1...Anuj: Woh ladki kitni sundar hai!
Rajiv: Mujhe uska naam pata hai..
Anuj: Kya naam hai uska?
Rajiv: Woh bank mein kaam karti hai, uske counter ke upar uska naam likha tha "CHAALU KHAATA"(Current account)...(Dono mawali hi rahoge.. sudhroge nahi..😉)

2...A taxi passenger Anuj tapped the driver Rajiv Bhalla on the shoulder to ask him a question. Rajiv Bhalla screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver Rajiv said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!"

The passenger Anuj apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much." Rajiv replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years. (Tumhein to cemetery mein hi rahna chaahiye Mr.Bhalla..)😛😆

3...Rajiv: Murgaa kaise diya.?

Anuj Murge wala: Rs.50, Rs. 40, aur Rs.10 ka

Rajiv: Rs. 10 itna sasta kyun ??

Anuj Murge wala: Saab isse Aids hai..

Rajiv: de do mujhe khaana hai,

Murgey kay saath shadi nahi karni !!!..😆😉(Haan Khaa aur mar..peecha chootega tumse..Manhoos aadmi)😛😛

4...Rajiv Bhalla had recently purchased a new computer with Microsoft Windows as the O/S and was unhappy with the same and writes a letter to Bill Gates, regarding the same.

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.

2. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

3. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this 'find' button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.

4. My child has learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?

5. I bought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'My Computer' when you will provide the remaining items?

6. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that

7. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.

8. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?

9. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God sake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.

Last one to Mr. Bill Gates: Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but you are selling WINDOWS?

Regards,
Rajiv Bhalla...

And next day Bill Gates sold the Microsoft co.😆😉😆..(Wah Rajiv Bhalla kya english hai tumhari?..)

Read the 5th one below, the real Blaster...😆

I hope you must have enjoyed reading the jokes two dumbs...

Waiting for your comments.

God Bless You All..😊

Set_raj...😊

Edited by set_raj - 15 years ago

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Rajesh

@set_raj

Inactive

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

Two friends Anuj Sethi and Rajiv Bhalla met after so many years and were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

Anuj Sethi said to Rajiv Bhalla, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once." We call this arranged marriage.
I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love... I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."

Rajiv Bhalla said, Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.
I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. "After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.
Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.
More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son i.e. my brother is my grandson.
Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson..
And you say you have family problems..
😆😉😆

This what Rajiv is, his character, his flirt nature will create like this problem for him in future...😆

Edited by set_raj - 15 years ago