Chapter 22

Chapter 22

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ONE WEEK LATER

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Arnav massaged his head with his fingers and tried to focus his mind on the file before him. But, all he could see was a black blur. He threw the file across the room and exhaled loudly.

“ASR?” Barely seconds had passed when Aman, his manager, entered his cabin. The fact that Aman was still keeping an eye on him made Arnav even more furious.

“Are you okay, ASR?” Aman asked, as he picked up the file from the corner.

“I am going home” Arnav replied and grabbing his coat from the chair, he stood up.

“Okay. I’ll postpone the meeting with Mittal Corp.” Aman said.

“You take the meeting. I don’t want to see him” Arnav replied and dashed out of the cabin.

Aman watched his boss leave and sighed. This was the third time in five days that Arnav had left in the middle of the day.

He wondered what it was that worried his boss. Ever since he had come back from Lucknow, he seemed unsteady and unpredictable. Aman also thought that sometimes his boss looked utterly sad. But, since it was not his place to say anything, he kept his observations to himself.

He simply hoped that things would get better for the man he has worked with for ten years. Because, he liked working alongside Arnav Singh Raizada!

~~**~~

Arnav sat in his car in the parking and stared at his phone.

Two missed calls. One unread message!

He exhaled in and out as he deleted the message without reading it.

He has done this for seven days now.

The night he reached Delhi he had to switch off his phone because it wouldn’t stop ringing.

First, it had been Khushi. She had called continuously for two days. Every hour!

But then it had been reduced to four or five calls a day. Now after a week, she called twice.

Every time Arnav ignored the call, it made his insides hurt.

But, he wasn’t ready to hear her voice. He didn’t want to hear what she was going to say.

He hadn’t been ready that day. He wasn’t ready now.

Another thing that disappointed him and pricked him every day was that Akash hadn’t called him. Not once.

His father had called a number of times. Even Doctor Kumar had called.

Arnav knew there was a limit for all of them to call. He waited for the calls to stop so he could go on with his life. The life that he has lived for so many years. It was a mistake for him to think that this could change. That he will get to live a different life, one filled with love.

Who was he kidding? He doesn’t get love. He has never been that lucky.

But, it’s alright. He told himself. He has lived without love so far. So, maybe he can do it again.

Telling himself that for the hundredth time, Arnav started the car and drove to Shantivan.

When he walked into the house, he found his Nani sitting in the drawing room.

She smiled broadly upon seeing him.

“You are early again! I cannot believe you are the same grandson, Chote. One who would not take a day off even after I requested you to” Devyani Raizada said, but her voice was warm.

“If you’re complaining I can go back to work, Nani” Arnav answered, forcing the smile on his face. It was a painful effort yet he did it.

“Not at all, Chote. I am glad you are giving yourself the break. Because you need it after coming back from that hell hole of a city” Devyani Raizada said, the smile turning serious.

“What I need is another head massage, Nani” Arnav said.

“Anytime, Chote! Go change your clothes. I will get the oil and come up” Devyani said.

“No. I’ll come to your room. The less you move the better. You’re still recovering, Nani” Arnav said, loosening his tie.

“Nonsense! I got better the minute you landed in Delhi, Chote. That is all I needed, you by my side” Devyani Raizada said as she placed a hand against Arnav’s cheek.

“Yeah” Arnav cleared his throat.

“Come down once you have changed” Devyani said and Arnav nodded before picking up his suitcase and walking up to his room.

He changed his clothes and freshened up.

Then he walked downstairs and visited Devyani’s room.

He closed his eyes once he lay down on the bed and Devyani started massaging his head.

As he closed his eyes, he found himself going back to the day everything went downhill for him.

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ONE WEEK AGO

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Arnav felt strange when he stepped out of Malik’s room. There was an invisible weight that seemed to have lightened and he felt freer.

You are my son too, Arnav.

He hadn’t expected how much those words will impact him. They were huge. For years, he had lived with the idea that his father did not want him, did not consider him his son. He thought he did not mean anything to Birendra Singh Malik.

So, while the words may not erase the past, they definitely made Arnav feel better about him.

He could not wait to talk to Khushi about this.

Because it was her who asked him to go and talk to his father!

“Hema!” Arnav called out the house help.

“Ji, Chote Saheb?” The woman appeared.

“Keep an eye on him. I am going out” He said to her.

The woman nodded her head and Arnav exited the Mahal.

He had asked Khushi to come see her in the evening but he could not wait. He wanted to know how it was going between Akash and Khushi.

Maybe he could go and help Khushi. If the two of them talked to Akash together, he would definitely understand. Arnav was sure of that.

So, he took out his car and drove speedily.

~~**~~

“I know why you didn’t tell me. Because you thought I liked someone else. You thought I liked Arpita!”

“It means that I didn’t like her”

“If the letters had been for her why wouldn’t I show them to you? Why would I hide the box from you?”

“You know what I am saying. Those letters were for you, Khushi. But, I could never give them to you. In fact, I didn’t want to. It was just my way of figuring out my thoughts. I used to write them to see what I felt. To figure out the things I would say to you. But, I could never say anything. Then, you lost Garima aunty and I knew there was no way I was going to trouble our friendship in any way. But, through Arpita, I thought I could guess your feelings because you too had never said a word to me. Years went by and I became sure that expecting anything more is too much of a risk. I already had you in my life, in my house. That was enough”

Arnav listened as he stood at the door of Khushi’s house. The door was almost closed but not completely. Arnav could see through the thin crack as Akash said one thing after the other.

As Akash declared that he was in love with Khushi.

Arnav recalled the conversation he had with Akash not too long ago.

“Do you like her?”

“She is my best friend, Bhai”

“I know that. But do you want more, Akash? Or is there someone else? Because over years, I have heard you talk about no one but Khushi”

“I don't think about it that way, Bhai. I just know that she is a big part of my life and I don't want that to change”

“So, you don’t love her?”

“No”

Arnav recalled that Akash had taken time in answering his questions. But, he had said no. He had said he did not love Khushi. So, he could not believe what he was hearing now.

“Don’t you see, Khushi? All of this..we are meant to be together. Or, why would all of this happen after so many years? After you gave up hope? After I gave up hope? Now, there is nothing standing between us. In fact, no one was ever in our way. It was just our insecurities that stopped us. Baba has made this possible now. He wants this for us. This will make him happy. This will make us happy”

Arnav watched as Akash held Khushi’s hand in hers. His chest constricted painfully at the sight.

He saw the confusion and the struggle on Khushi’s face as she said she cannot believe what Akash is saying.

“Arnav..”

Arnav felt his heart nearly stop and then beat wildly when Khushi spoke his name. This is it. This is the moment. Khushi will tell Akash who she really loves. But Akash cut her off.

“Don’t worry about him. I will talk to him. He will understand, Khushi. He knows how long we have been friends for. I didn’t tell him about this..about what I felt. But, I will. I will tell him that I love you. I am sure he will understand. All these years he managed without you just fine. Both of us will talk to him. You will have to tell him that you love me. We can also tell him that you started talking to him only because I asked you to. We can make everything clear to him. Once we do that, once you tell him all this, Bhai will understand. I am sure. He too would understand that two people who love each other should be together. Isn’t that what we all learnt from Baba’s life?”

Arnav took a sharp breath as the words pelted his heart.

“You started talking to him only because I asked you to”

Arnav could feel the ground moving beneath his feet. What was happening here? Is he going through a nightmare?

You’re right, Akash. That’s what we learnt from Malik Uncle’s life. People who do not love each other should not be together”

Khushi was saying but Arnav did not want to hear anymore. He wanted to run away but his legs seemed to be frozen.

“What are you doing?” Akash was saying.

“I am calling Arnav”

That made Arnav jerk into action. He began rushing away, moving back towards his car as his phone rang in his hands.

Arnav kept staring at the phone until it stopped ringing. He noticed that his hands were shaking. He got inside his car and watched the phone ring again.

It was Khushi calling.

Arnav closed his eyes and steadied his hand.

He could not find the strength to receive the call.

What will she say? What was he going to say her?

His entire friendship with her was based on a lie? She became his friend because Akash wanted her to? And now Akash was offering her the love she always wanted. Both of them had loved each other. Who was he to step in between?

What if he receives the call and Khushi tells him exactly that? That she wants to be Akash now that she knows he loves her too?

Arnav rested his head against the steering wheel.

Even if Khushi doesn't say that, can he do this?

I always lose the people I love the most.

His own words resonated in his head, followed by Akash's words.

“I will tell him that I love you”

“All these years he managed without you just fine”

“You started talking to him only because I asked you to”

Akash’s words refused to leave Arnav's head.

No. He screamed but no voice came out.

Akash is in love with Khushi.

That explains why he reacted so badly. And judging by what played out in Khushi's house, there was a chance that she could accept Akash's love.

Akash was her first love. Arnav knew what that meant because he felt it for Khushi.

It meant what he feared all these years was really true. Akash and Khushi did love each other.

It was him who stepped between them.

What should he do now?

Should he go back and tell Akash to forget Khushi? Can he ask Akash to do that?

It was one thing to ask Akash to back off when Arnav thought Akash wanted to marry Khushi for his father’s sake!

And even if he goes back there and asks Khushi to stay with him..will he be able to forget that he snatched Khushi from his brother?

“People who do not love each other should not be together”

“Did she say the exact words? That she loves you? Because I don’t believe she would do that, Bhai. Khushi is not so fickle. She can’t be loving me one day and you another”

Yes, she didn’t say the words. Was it because she was still in doubt? Deep down, did she still like Akash?

“What should I do?” He screamed.

As if in answer, his phone rang again.

He stared at the screen and picked it up.

“Arnav! You need to come back. Right now! Ma is in hospital” Manohar Singh Raizada, his Mama, was saying.

Arnav felt the last thread snapping.

“What happened” He clutched the phone.

“Don’t act as if you don’t know anything!” It was his Maami speaking now.

“We told you earlier that she was refusing her medicines and the dialysis. We told you she was not keeping well but you did not care one bit. What you wanted has finally happened! She will die and you can have all her property. That’s what you wanted, didn’t you?” Manorama Raizada was saying.

“Stop it, Manorama. This is not the time” Manohar’s voice said.

Arnav closed his eyes and wished the nightmare would end.

“Please come, Arnav. She was refusing treatment as well. The doctors had to sedate her before they could begin the treatment. We do not know what is going to happen. You need to be here before she wakes up” Manohar Raizada said.

Arnav listened while his head spun and his heart throbbed painfully.

Was this the answer?

Is the dream over?

“I’ll be there by tonight” Arnav said.

“That’s great, Arnav. I’ll see you then” Manohar Singh Raizada said.

Arnav disconnected the phone and drove the car to the Mahal.

He reached his room and packed his essentials in a suitcase.

As he reached downstairs, he looked once towards the guest room where his father was resting.

“You are going somewhere, Chote Saheb?” Arnav heard Ratan Kaka’s voice.

Arnav bowed down and touched the old man’s feet.

“Take care, Kaka!” He said as the man placed his hand on Arnav’s head.

“Do you want me to inform Malik Saheb? Call Akash bitwa? Khushi bitiya?” The man asked as he noticed the look on Arnav’s face.

“No, Kaka!” Arnav said and moved past the man.

He halted a few steps away and turned back.

“If you see Khushi, tell her it’s alright. It was a dream anyway” Arnav said, unable to stop as his voice cracked.

“Chote Saheb..” Ratan Kaka said but Arnav hurried out the door.

He opened the car and threw the suitcase in and drove away.

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PRESENT TIME

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“Feeling better?” Arnav heard his Nani asking.

“Hmm” He said, turning and hiding his face in her lap.

“Chote?” Devyani Singh Raizada asked, running her hands in his hair.

“Hmm” Arnav said.

“I am sorry”

Arnav slowly looked up at his Nani.

“What for, Nani?” He asked.

“I know you rushed back here as soon as you heard I was in the hospital. You did what I knew you would. It was my last move. I knew it hurt you, and I was being selfish but it was the only way to get you back from the people who have caused you pain all your life. I am sorry I put you through this” Devyani Raizada said.

Arnav listened.

“When I called Birendra that day...I did not know you would overhear everything and the ugly past will be laid bare before you. And once that happened, I could not forgive myself. I knew it would have broken your heart to learn what a degenerate your father is. The kind of life he lives..I did not want him to infect you with his polluted lifestyle. I needed you to be away from him from as soon as possible. At any cost!” Devyani Singh Raizada said.

Arnav could not find words to speak, so he listened.

“That man...he has some kind of talent. He knows how to catch hold of people’s mind. Because once he caught hold of Sujata’s mind, he was like a disease in her brain. Sometimes I find it impossible to believe that my daughter knew about his sickness, yet she lived with him. And that is what I feared for you. If he could trap Sujata, he could trap you. That is why I never wanted you to go back to him. I was trying to save you from the truth of knowing what a repulsing and sickening type of man your father is! A worm who...”

“That’s enough, Nani” Arnav sat up, his face tight and his fists clenched.

“I am sorry, Chote. I know it must be hard for you to hear this, but we have not talked about it” Devyani Raizada said.

“No, Nani. We don’t need to talk about it. I want to forget everything. Everything that has anything to do with Lucknow” Arnav said.

Devyani Singh Raizada allowed a minute’s silence between them.

“Okay, Chote. But, I just need to know one thing. You haven’t forgiven him, have you? Because he does not deserve it! He is still the kind of creature he was always. A man who.. . I cannot even say it! That is something no one should forgive. He purposely ruined Sujata’s life. He ruined your life because of his..sickness” Devyani Raizada said.

“I haven’t forgiven anything” Arnav said, looking away from his Nani.

“Good, Chote! That is what I wanted to know. We do not need such filth in our lives. The sooner he dies, the better it w....”

Arnav stood up and began walking out the room.

“Arnav?” Devyani Singh Raizada called out, making him stop.

“I was still talking” She said.

“I can’t hear it any more, Nani” Arnav said, his fists balled.

“What can’t you hear?” Devyani Raizada asked.

“You need to rest, Nani. We don’t need this conversation. So, let’s not talk any more about this. I am back from there. I said I want to forget everything that has anything to do with Lucknow. Isn’t that enough?” Arnav asked, turning to look at his Nani.

“I want to know what I said that you seem so upset suddenly?” Devyani Raizada probed.

Arnav remained quiet.

“Chote?” Devyani Raizada said.

Arnav looked at his Nani and then looked away.

“I don’t want to have this conversation. Not now. Not ever. Lucknow..and everyone from there..does not matter to me any more. So, let’s stop talking about them” Arnav said.

“Everyone? Does this mean you have finally realized that associating with Akash is not good for any of us?” Devyani Raizada asked, her face brightening just a little.

“Yes” Arnav said, staring at the floor.

“Good! That is really good, Chote. Of course, we can bury all of this” Devyani Raizada said and moved forward, hugging Arnav.

Arnav tried hard to swallow the lump that was burning his throat but it did not move an inch.

The duo was still hugging when Hari Prakash, the house help, appeared.

“Arnav Bhaiya?” The man politely cleared his throat.

Arnav pulled away from his Nani and turned to the man.

“What?” He asked sharply.

“Guests..outside..waiting for you” The man said hurriedly.

“Who is it?” Devyani Raizada asked.

Arnav did not wait to hear. He was already moving to the hall.

Once he reached there, he stopped dead in his tracks. His heart began pumping ten times faster and his hands became sweaty.

“Bhai” said Akash.

But, Arnav was staring at the other person in the room just as she stared at him.

“Khushi” Her name left his lips.

Because it was certainly Khushi who stood before him, looking as beautiful as ever!

The two of them looked at each other for a full minute before Arnav found his voice.

“What are you two doing here?” He asked, doing his best to hide the mix of feelings rushing through him at the moment.

Arnav watched as Khushi walked up to him. She was not smiling. She was not anything. There was hardness in her eyes that he had not seen before.

Arnav struggled for more words, but he could not find any.

He simply watched as she stood before him and slapped him. Hard.

Arnav felt the stinging pain and the sound of the slap ringing in his ears.

But, all he could focus upon were the tears that filled her eyes.

“You are a liar!” Khushi said, raising another hand and hitting him one more time.

Arnav did not even blink. Did nothing to stop her because he could not process what was happening. What was she doing here?

“You are a liar AND a coward” Khushi said, raising her hand one more time but her hand was caught mid-air.

By Devyani Singh Raizada, who stepped between the two and stared Khushi down.

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