Chapter 20
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[MEMBERSONLY]
EXPELLIARMUS 2013-07-25 05:21:43
Please scroll up for Part One.
10) Mohabbat inme dard banke rehti hai..
(Part Two)
"I...I thought you might have some questions about the trust vote..."
"I might, but you can answer them in the office. But for now, I want to talk about last night."
Her heart stilled, and her palms turned clammy with sweat.
"I..."
"There was a lot that was said last night, Khushi. And yet, there is so much that remains unsaid."
"I don't think..."
"Khushi, you're wrong."
"What?"
"If you are blaming yourself, if you think that you are solely responsible for what happened ten years ago...then you are mistaken."
"It was me, I made a..."
"...mistake, Khushi. You made an error in judgement, something that the rest of us does everyday. But in this case, things went out of hand rapidly..."
"What? I can't believe that..."
"...I am the one saying this? Believe it, Khushi. For the past ten years, I have thought about things the same way that you did. If I ever allowed myself to think about it rationally, I knew that everyone was to blame for what happened that night. Nani, me...even Di, herself. And you, of course."
She closed her eyes tightly,then heard him take a deep breath.
"I'm not absolving you of all blame, Khushi. I know that you did something wrong, and I have suffered terribly as a result. But last night...I saw with my own eyes...how you have suffered too. You all have. And...you are still punishing yourself for it. For something that happened as a result of a million other factors..."
"I don't deserve to be happy."
"What about me?"
"What?"
"Do you think that I deserve to be happy?"
"Yes...of course, you do...why are you asking me this?"
"Because increasingly, I've come to believe that my happiness lies in your hands."
Speechless, she could only stare down at his gift, her fingers unconsciously caressing it as she thought about what he had just said.
"Last night I realized that your pain gives me pain. Your anguish magnifies my own. And if you aren't happy...then there's no way that I can be, either."
Her voice came out in a whisper.
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that some things are bigger than hatred. I still don't quite know what this is between us...but I know that it has broken down a barrier that I had painstakingly built over a decade."
"Are you saying that...you have forgotten the past?"
"That is impossible for me, as well as for you. What I'm saying is that...I want to move on. With you."
"I...I don't know if I can..."
He sighed.
"I know. This is all too much to take in at once, for both of us. Let's take things slow, okay?"
"What do you mean?"
"Let's keep these midnight talks going for now. And when you are ready to take the next step...just wear my gift, and I will know."
A few moments later, Khushi placed the phone down, feeling lighter than she had all these days.
There were still things to think about...obstacles to cross, barriers to break.
But for now, she placed his gift under her pillow, and slept with a small smile on her lips.
________
One week later, Khushi held the phone to her ear, aware that her heart was racing .
"Khushi, are you ready for this?"
"Yes...I think I am, La."
"I've told NK the entire story, so it won't come as a shock to him."
"Lavanya, I don't know how to thank you for all you have..."
"Shut up, Khushi. Okay, I'm giving him the phone now."
Khushi closed her eyes, unable to believe what she was doing.
If anyone had told her one week back that she would be calling her brother to tell him about Arnav, then she would have called them crazy.
But now, everything had changed.
Over the past seven days, their professional life had been hit by crisis after crisis. The PM had been unable to convince Pratap Singh to stay in the coalition, and the fate of the Government now rested in the hands of the M.Ps who would vote in the No-confidence motion later today.
The ministry had been in a state of upheaval, and there had been no time to think about anything else.
In the midst of all this, their late night phone calls had become an ocean of calm.
They talked about everything, and nothing at all.
Sometimes the conversations would turn serious, with Arnav initiating the discussion about his family, or hers. And sometimes they would talk about their cave expedition, and he would laugh at her stubborness in taking up the challenge.
Sometimes he teased and flirted, and she laughed.
For her, these conversations were the beginning of something new. Something fragile...and beautiful.
But he had quickly grown impatient with talking over the phone, and last night he had finally convinced her to go out for dinner with him at a little-known dhaba on the highway.
She had reluctantly agreed, then finally picked up the phone and called Lavanya.
She had kept this secret long enough. She knew from past experience that keeping secrets from her family was a terrible idea, and so she had told La everything.
And finally, Lavanya had told NK.
Even as she thought his name, she heard his voice on the other end of the line.
"Khushi?"
"Bhai, I..."
"Stop, Khushi. Before you say anything else, I want to thank you."
"Thank me?"
"Yes. For having the courage to tell us the truth. For not making the same mistake I made ten years ago."
She was stunned,and her voice reflected that.
"Bhai, I thought you would..."
"...be angry and yell? To be honest, that was my first response when La told me the truth. But now...now it's different, Khushi. I just want you to know that I...we are all here for you, no matter what you decide to do."
Tears sprang into her eyes, and she rushed into speech,
"I don't know what to say..."
"Wait, Khushi. That doesn't mean that we aren't worried about you. Couldn't you find any other man, for God's sake?"
She laughed nervously, then waited for her brother to continue.
"I'm afraid for you, Khushi. This is the man who...well you know exactly what he has felt towards us for so long. And then there all the differences between you two..."
"I know that, Bhai. But I...I just want to take this chance..."
"I want you to be happy, Khushi. And I cannot see you getting yourself hurt...and that's why I have one condition."
"Condition?"
"I'm coming there, Khushi. I want to meet Arnav Singh Raizada."
________
Arnav stepped out of his SUV, just as the first drops of rain splashed onto the pavement.
He stared up at the sky, aware that nothing could dampen his mood today.
Excitement and anticipation thrummed through his veins, and he walked quickly towards her building.
But then he stilled, because she was there already.
Dressed in a red anarkali with her hair in a braid, she took his breath away.
As he stared, she took one step towards him, then looked up at the sky too.
The rain came down heavily then, drenching them both in seconds.
"Khushi! Get back inside!"
He grasped her arm and pulled her back into the shelter of the patio.
She stumbled, and he pulled her close, steadying her with one arm around her waist.
"Are you alright?"
"I...I'm fine."
"Why would anyone deliberately step into the rain, dammit?"
"I didn't think it would be that heavy! Now I'm all wet and..."
A sudden awareness flared to life between them.
His gaze dropped to her slim figure, and he took in the red material that clung to her curves like a second skin.
Tendrils of damp hair had escaped her neat braid, and droplets of water streamed down her face.
He raised one finger and traced the path of one drop that wound it's way down her face, stopping right at her lips.
She was staring at him with an expression he had never seen before.
He had seen many emotions flit through those expressive eyes.
Anger, anguish, humor, joy...and pain.
There had been moments through the past few days when he had seen the pain...but it had always reminded him of...something else...
Something that he couldn't quite name yet.
But this time, there was no mistaking the emotion in the hazel eyes.
Passion.
And it was all for him.
He exulted in it, reveled in it.
He wanted to drown in it.
In one swift movement, he pulled her close and took her lips in a searing kiss.
It wasn't soft, nor was it gentle.
It was a kiss of possession, of acknowledgement.
He traced a fiery path over her lips with his own, his tongue tracing the seam of her lips.
He pulled her close as she shuddered, then ran his hand down her back until it rested on her waist.
He felt her fingers trace the lapels of his jacket, and pulled her even closer.
Then suddenly, he heard a sound.
One that caused him to abruptly break off the kiss, then look down at her.
He stilled completely.
She was wearing his gift to her.
He looked into her passion-clouded eyes, then swore softly.
What the hell was he doing?
He was practically mauling her in a public place with no regard for consequences...no thought in his mind except the softness of her lips, and the heat of their desire for each other.
He stepped away, wondering if he had caused irreparable damage to their fragile relationship.
"Khushi...this was a bad idea..."
He took another step away, then paused suddenly.
Because her hand had grasped his, imprisoning it in a delicate hold.
"Please don't go, Arnav."
*************
A/N: 'Shattered' will end in two more updates, plus an epilogue. This has been an incredible journey and I really hope that you will like the conclusion!
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