Chapter#8
He smiled, feeling the moment her hand stopped trembling as he held it there fast against his chest. "Do you feel that, Mehek? How strong my heart beats?"
Her eyes widened when she raised her head and got lost in the depth of his. She nodded as she gave a breathy reply. "H-haan, Shaurya."
"It does because of you, Jaan: for you and you alone. Well actually that's not true ... it did until our little one joined us: that is," he added. "You and little Meera are the reason I am. The Shaurya you think to be out of your reach is a mere fragment of the man in love with his wife and his child. I love you so much."
She blinked rapidly, wondering if she had fallen into sort of trance, or if the man beside had actually made such a confession that she could only fathom being uttered in a dream. She must have considering what he had just declared was a complete fabrication.
"I love you Mehek," he reaffirmed.
Her mouth opened with intention of espousing a suitable response, but nothing came out. What was he doing? She shook her head in denial, but Shaurya smiled at her gently and threw her own words back at her. "How can you not believe me, Mehek? You must know that I do."
Crushing disappointment flashed in her eyes, and she immediately attempted to withdraw from him bodily as well as emotionally. "Don't mock me," she stated. "This isn't a subject to joke about."
"How is telling you our truth mocking you? I do love you. Just as you love me... I get that you may not recall us or our marriage but admit that at least." He observed her downturned head, seeing that more coaxing would be needed to get the confession he was seeking. "You know, I dream of you too, Mehek. Many of them some variation of this this right here: the moment when I finally get to say the words that I have been holding in for months; the moment when you respond in kind... or not... Those ones: the ones when you deny us, are truly terrifying to me," he added dolefully. Her attention gained, Mehek looked up once more. She still appeared stunned.
"Perhaps my way of thinking is wrong. Perhaps in your mind, there is nothing beyond the amity we have developed these last months is all that is left between us. If that's the case..."
"It's not," she blurted out. "I mean, we are friends, but you mean so much more than that. I-I cannot imagine a day when you are not with me... but there is no way...I am not your wife, Shaurya."
"Nor can I bear being apart from you," he finished to reassure her, completely ignoring her denial. "It's not my intention to pressure you, Jaan, but now that Meera is here, it's time that we deal with the truth about..."
She interrupted him. "I do love you Shaurya. I can't deny it any longer, but what you are saying is impossible. I would know; somehow I would if what you are saying is true."
"Tell me what you see when you sleep, Mehek. What do you dream?"
She looked like a deer caught in the brightest of headlights as she reflected on her recent imaginings. "Impossible things, Shaurya," she whispered. She swallowed as she became teary-eyed.
Shaurya tapped down the urge to apologize for her blatant distress, even as he felt a massive weight of lifted off his shoulders. He exhaled, and for the first time Mehek saw the anxiety the self-assured man had hidden. He finally removed her hand from his upper body and brought it up to his lips. Her palm was his target and the intimate gesture set flight a flurry of emotions someone in her condition should not be feeling. His confidence was back now that he had declared himself. "I know this seems impossible..."
"More than impossible; it's intolerable, Shaurya," she seethed. "If there an ounce of truth to this, then I can't believe how you could have withheld something so critical from me. Knowing my confusion: all of the thoughts I harbored. How could you never give any indication...it is the most selfish..." She pulled her hand from him and used it to cover her mouth. It didn't camouflage the wail that emanated from behind it. She groaned more when she sat up faster than she should, and her body protested the action. Both hands flew out in front of her, batting at him when Shaurya reached for her.
"No Shaurya I can't... get out... just go away... and just stay away from me."
******
Where was he?
She tried to be rational. Everything: the fact that he had been a constant in her life, providing practically 24-hour care from the very beginning, to ensconcing her in his suite, gave credence to truth to what he told her. By virtue of that, his absence didn't mean that he had deserted her. Yet somehow the symbolism of the last of the sun's rays fading giving way to the cold, dark night that lay ahead, reminded her of how abandoned she was feeling now that he had gone, and set her body to shaking uncontrollably. It was a completely illogical thought; the man owned the place after all, so in theory he had to be around somewhere, but before she knew it Mehek had burst into tears.
Holding the baby, the nurse shook her head, feeling pity for the new mother, whose fluctuating hormones had hit her hard this afternoon. As she took a turn away from the sliding door that lead to the suite's balcony, she heard the soft rap on the bedroom door, before it opened revealing the one person who could break through the new mother's distress.
Shaurya's attention immediately centered on the muffled weeping that punctuated the relative quiet of the suite. His brow furrowed as he looked from his wife to the nurse.
"Baby Blues, Shaurya Sir. They will magnify any slight issue by one thousand. Ideally, the worst of it will be over in the next week or two, but we should watch for any chronic decline in her mood just to be safe."
The worried husband nodded, all the while internally cursing himself for his actions earlier in the day. This was all his fault. He had been absolutely thoughtless in his need to set matters straight. He had been so sure that Mehek would have been far more receptive to the news of their true connection. With no choice, he had spent the afternoon reflecting of where he had gone wrong, and how he could remedy the situation. All the same, finding her in this state was not what he expected either. "And Meera," he asked, wondering if Mehek's condition had adversely affected the baby's care.
"She's just fine...if nothing else, caring for her daughter, proved the most settling aspect of your wife's day. The temperature will be falling soon, so it would be best to get her best inside soon as possible."
"Ji Sister... and thank you."
Grabbing a throw from out of his cupboard, Shaurya left the bedroom for the outdoor sitting area. He noticed straight away that his financial reports were out there with Mehek. Perversely he was glad that they were. At least that meant that everything was laid out on the table. Quietly he approached his still sobbing spouse and placed the soft cashmere blanket around her shoulders. "Lean forward, Mehek," he asked, and adjusted the cover around her for maximum warmth. He came around to the front of her and after grabbing the chair next hers, he sat down facing her and began rubbing her hand that already felt cool to the touch. "I am sorry you are so unhappy. If I could rewind this day and spare you this heartache..." he paused, because to tell her that he would have done otherwise, wasn't worth lying to her. "Just know that I love you, and everything I have done; everything decision I have made in this situation has been borne out my love for you and for our unborn child." He got no response but at least she acknowledged him by grasping his hands. She squeezed her eyes tight, forcing out a few more tears out of them, before finally looking back at him through her wet spikey lashes.
"If what you are saying is true, how is it possible that we got together in the first place? I may not be fully conscious of my background, but I am positive more than ever that we were never contemporaries."
"Love knows no boundaries, Mehek: when it is true nothing can stand in its way." He stared intently into her eyes. "We had come here on honeymoon. I had just purchased the property and thought it the perfect time to explore all that the resort had to offer. I should never have insisted on that river-rafting excursion, and to this day, it ranks as one of the worst decisions I've ever made. I almost lost my mind after the accident that shouldn't have happened, separated us and the three long months when no-one could locate you was my personal hell on earth. To have you return, was a miracle, that still to this day I thank God for. Even when it was clear that you had changed; had forgotten everything, I was and still am the most grateful man for the second chance I had been given. I want to show you something. Something I probably should have let you see a long time ago." He let go of her hands and pulled out his mobile. He found the image he sought and turned it towards her. She looked at the photo of the two of them, resplendent in wedding finery. "I went against both our families in deciding not to tell you the truth after you came back. And then again in choosing to stay here instead of returning home. Every choice I made these last six months was predicated on your wellbeing and the health of our unborn child." He took the phone from her hands and placed the device on top of the folders that represented his many business interests, none of which meant a damn thing to him if she was not at his side. "However, my decision now, today is purely because I love you and my need for you to understand that my heart belongs to you, and that I need your complete happiness to be whole." He pulled another item from his pockets and then shifted so that he was kneeling in front of her. "Six months ago, you removed this for safekeeping just until we finished our river-rafting. I suggested you do the same with your wedding chain, which you flatly denied. Your mangalsutra and your sindoor were sacramental symbols of our marriage that you would not part with willingly. I have a greater appreciation for that now and look forward to the day when you will again accept both from me. Mehek, even though things are different now, I know the foundation our love remains, which is why I am asking you to accept this ring from me again. It was a promise to love and cherish you then, and one that extends to today and all of our tomorrows." The diamond ring sparkled as it inexplicably managed to catch one of the very last beams of sunlight. "I love you Mehek: the woman you once were and the woman you have become. Will you do me the honor of marrying me again?"
[NOCOPY]
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