Chapter 78

71.Dillagi 

|| Infatuation||

Kirti moved the paper scissors gingerly along the sketched dotted line. She was fashioning a sword out of a corrugated cardboard sheet. Silver and gold glitter foam papers pressed under her thighs rustled with her movement.

‘Fevicol,’ she uttered when she was done with the cutting and looked around for the adhesive tube. ‘Muskan, fevicol?’ She asked one of the girls. They were all busy making props for the drama to be performed on Foundation Day. 

‘Here,’ Muskan stretched out her arm to pass the tube. Since Kirti had no intention of turning up on Foundation Day, she had dropped in two days before the day. She wanted to respect Mrinalini’s invitation and also did not want to see Nishit. 

When she had come here with Radha, she found the building was being decorated with strings of light. Everyone in the institute was busy with preparations for the day. The campus was filled with festive spirit with people running around decorating the stage, practicing their skit, speech, and music recitals. Kirti found it nostalgic. It was like being thrown back to her academic days when they would excitedly prepare for some event. 

Since she had a deft hand at such jobs, she had volunteered to help in prop making.

Kirti glanced at Radha who was a vision in a snowy lace frock and flitted from one room to the hallway playing with other older kids. Opening the cap of the fevicol tube, Kirti proceeded to cover the sword with glitter paper.

‘Muskan, can you please lend a hand?’ 

‘Oh sure Di!’ Muskan shuffled to Kirti's side and helped her in finishing the sword. 

‘Wow...woww...beautiful...wow!!’ Murmurs of praise rose from the other corner of the room making both Kirti and Muskan look up from their work.

Sanyukta had finished with her tiara crown. It was a silver hair comb with small pink and large blue stones studded across it.

‘It’s beautiful. Did she make the entire thing herself?’ Kirti asked.

‘Yes. She’s quite talented.’ Muskan informed.

Kirti looked at the barely sixteen-year-old Sanyukta, owner of long-flowing hair that touched her knees, and felt it was only fair that she could wrest such beautiful hair ornaments from a piece of wire. 

People usually looked at the institute as a place where orphans or women rejected by society were given shelter. In reality, it housed unparalleled talent. Mrinalini had been correct in stating that it wasn’t her who was doing a favor on these women and girls; it was the other way round. Every year, the women were able to amass enough revenue with their skills, to run the non-profit organization without any external assistance.

‘Kirti Di, Madam is calling you,’ A girl informed her from the door.

‘Okay coming.’ Kirti stood up instructing Muskaan to take care of the rest.

‘Radha, let’s go.’ She called out and when Radha continued to play, she had to threaten, ‘Fine, keep playing. I am going.’ When Radha saw that Kirti had gained considerable ground without her, she quit her play and ran to catch up with her guardian. Together they followed the girl who was leading the way.

‘Kirti you came,’ Mrinalini met them in the corridor.

‘Come...come...Look who’s here..’ She touched her arm, indicating Kirti to follow her into a room. Kirti hung back for it was the music room Mrinalini was headed to and going by the bounce in the old woman’s steps, who else it could be other than her dear grandson.

So much for not crossing paths with him! What will he think?

As if on cue, the strumming of the guitar began and the words of a forgotten song in a familiar voice floated to her.

‘Ae subah aa bhi jaa..,’ He crooned.

‘Raat ko kar vida...dilruba aa bhi jaa…’

Rooted to her spot, she decided to hear him hum sweet nothings - words that were forbidden to her ears - from a distance. When she didn't have to face the anger and indifference in his eyes, she could pretend he was singing it for her. His voice reminded her of the first time she had witnessed him singing a Hindi song.

Foolish woman! It was not the song she was obsessed with rather it was the pure feelings and his soul that he put into the song that amplified the quality of it.

Was it the moment that had started it all?

‘Come child, what are you doing there?’ Mrinalini stepped out, clearly exasperated with her slow response.

With heavy feet, she dragged herself inside.

As soon as she stepped inside, their eyes locked and he missed a few chords ruining the haze that surrounded others.

Her heart, deciding to mimic him, skipped a few beats too.

She turned her eyes on the walls behind him. They were tiger-orange in color.

He continued to bore holes in her person - she could feel his gaze burn her face - before he yielded looking down at his instrument, picking off from where he had left off.

‘Mere... mere dil ke pagalpan ki oh seema kya hai…

Youn toh tu hai meri...chhaya tujhmein auuurr tera kya hai...’

Main hun gagan...tu hai zameen...adhuri si mere bina..

Raat ko alvida...’

When the song ended, he made a beeline for her amidst the claps and praises. Her breathing quickened, and her ears felt warm. Her toes crawled inwards when she felt him near, but it was two pairs of feet that stood before her.

Her gaze traveled up locking with a pair of hazel eyes. Aahana. In flesh and soul. 

‘Aahana, this is Kirti. We used to be classmates. Kirti, Aahana - my fiancee.’

How did she not notice this woman?

Tall, beautiful Aahana decked in the softest of crimson silk-suit shot her precious hand out.

‘Hello,’ She said. Her wide-set eyes, rimmed with a dark liner, with interest floating in them assessed her worth. Her perfect lips flexed in a gentle smile.

Kirti’s thumb and finger rubbed together to peel off the dried fevicol before she shook the woman’s hands.

‘Nice to meet you. Congratulations. You both make a lovely couple.’

‘Congratulations, Nishit.’ She offered him her hand. ‘Wishing you infinite happiness.’

Mrinalini was standing beside the new couple and her old wise eyes did not fail to notice the little flex of his fingers as he pulled his hand back after the handshake.

He was quickly encircled by little girls with instruments and music sheets; his amused fiancee stepping back and sidling next to Mrinalini.

‘Dadimaa, I must leave now,’ Kirti informed.

‘So soon?’ She asked.

Aahana played with her ebony black-silky mass of curls that rested on one side of her shoulder, the other covered with a transparent dupatta.

‘I have an errand to run.’

‘Try to come on Foundation Day, Chiki.’

‘It won’t be possible, Dadimaa.’

‘Fine, then some other time. Do visit.’

‘I will. Radha,’ she called out and realized she was one of the girls surrounding Nishit. ‘Radha…’ She called again to no effect until Nishit, now seated on a chair, nudged the girl towards her.

‘You have a cute kid, Kirti,’ complemented Aahana.

‘Thank you. Let’s go,’ Kirti said, clasping Radha’s fingers. ‘Say bye to Dadi.’ Radha waved at Mrinalini and then at Aahana, who was wagging her three fingers affectionately.

Once out of the room, Kirti’s pace quickened so much that one of her flats fell behind her and she stumbled. Lacking clear sense of purpose, she stood senselessly at one spot. Radha had to go back and bring the slipper for her and even tap Kirti's foot to nudge her into wearing it.

And she had thought she had loved Tejas! Stupid stupid her!

XxxX

He flicked the cigarette out as soon as he felt his grandmother behind him. It was funny how he was twenty-eight and still, his heart sped at being caught smoking.

'Attraction and smell of a cig cannot be concealed.They spread in the air too quickly to remain undiscovered.'

‘I am trying to quit, Dadimaa.’ He explained, turning to face her.

'How old is this habit child?’ She looked into his eyes and he felt his soul had been unclothed.

‘What? Smoking?’

‘How old?’ She repeated.

‘Fifteen?’

‘And you think you can quit?’

 XxxX

It was past midnight when Kirti decided she would tell him everything. Every single thing from the truth of her marriage to her mother reappearing in their life. He had offered help, hadn’t he? She would tell him that she had never wanted to marry Mayank, she didn’t love Mayank and she reciprocated his obsession too.

It was dark in the room. Radha slept on the folding bed while Kirti lay on a mattress on the floor. Patting her bedding for her phone, she decided to call him.

In this dark, she could acquire the forbidden. What if her courage would leave with the arrival of the sun?

She typed the first two letters of his name and the number appeared. He was just a ring away.

What had he said? A lapdog at your service. Do you even take me as a human with feelings?

What consequence would it serve you, now? He has moved on. Let him.

You have always been selfish. You destroyed Shruti’s chances. You trapped Mayank . You want to steal Radha away from him.. You also want to steal Nishit from Aahana.

I am always trying to steal others' things. Do I have no shame?

She dialed Shruti’s number instead because she had not apologized enough and because she had to keep away herself from the thought of wanting him back.

XxxX

Tumhein dillagi bhool jani pare gi
Muhabbat ki raahon mein aa kar to dekho
Tarapne pe mere na phir tum hanso ge
Tarapne pe mere na phir tum hanso ge
Kabhi dil kissi se laga kar to dekho

You will have to forget all about infatuation
Try embarking upon on the journey of love!
You will not mock my suffering then…
You will not mock my suffering then…
When you have tried giving your heart to someone!

Jafaaein buhat kien buhat zulm dhaye
Kabhi ik nigah-e-karam iss taraf bhi
Humesha huay dekh kar mujh ko barham
Kissi din zara muskura kar to dekho

Broke my heart, and tortured me plenty
Perhaps a kind gaze this way now?
Forever my sight offended you
Perhaps direct a smile my way now?

Jo ulfat mein har ek sitam hai gawara
Yeh sab kuch hai paas-e-wafa tum se warna
Satate ho din raat jiss tarha mujh ko
Kissi ghair ko youn sata kar to dekho

In love I have born every wound inflicted
All this is in custody of my sincerity to you
The way that you tease me day and night…
Try to tease another and see!

Agarche kissi baat par woh khafa hain
To acha yehi hai tum apni si kar lo
Woh maanein na mannein yeh marzi hai unki
Magar un ko pur-nam mana kar to dekho

Though she seems upset about something
Perhaps it is better to just move on
To accept me or not, that is her will
But try to convince her with all your passion!

Wafaaon ki hum se tawaqo nahin hai
Wafaaon ki hum se tawaqo nahin hai
Magar ek baar aazma kar to dekho
Zamanay ko apna bana kar to dekha
Humein bhi tum apna bana kar to dekho

You may not expect me to be faithful

You may not expect me to be faithful

But, you must try me at least once…

You gave yourself to this world…

Now try making me your own!

Hum na samjhe teri nazron ka taqaza kya hai
Kabhi parda kabhi jalwa yeh tamasha kya hai
Khuda ke liye chor do ab yeh parda…

I couldn’t understand what is the intent of your gaze
Shy this moment, and inviting the next, what is this game?
For God’s sake, reveal yourself now…

Jan-e-jan hum se uljhan nahin dekhi jaati
Khuda ke liye chor do ab yeh parda…

My darling, I cannot bear to see this struggle now
For God’s sake, reveal yourself now…

[ Translation Credit  - Sur Street - the world of rhythm and music.]

[MEMBERSONLY]

[NOCOPY]