Chapter 45

42. On Your Own

‘Next week if you can, son, go and negotiate about the dowry with the Adhikaris. Eight lakhs is maximum I am willing to give.’ Karuna was at Ojhas place. She had come to talk about the ongoing marriage talks that were going on between the Adhikaris and them. The Adhikaris had approved of Kirti’s photograph and once the dowry was fixed, the boy and family can meet Kirti as and when they like.

‘Certainly Maaji. But eight lakhs is too much?’ Mr Ojha reasoned. ‘You have to think about yourself as well.’ He also couldn’t figure how Karuna Singh would produce this hefty amount. 

‘I have no worries about my future, Ojha. After all, how long will I live? In a year, Biplab would hopefully get a job and I will go wherever he takes me. But I am not even counting on him. After all which way the camel would sit who knows. Tomorrow if he begins to find my presence bothersome, then what. You cannot foretell the future, son. I am not dependent on him. Once the children are all well settled,I will go to my native place and live there.’

‘Nahi, nahi Maaji, your grandchildren love you very dearly and are too fond of you. You think they will let you out of their sight even for a second? You are very lucky in this department. You have raised two very devoted children, Maaji.’ Ojha reassured his old neighbour.

Karuna beamed and preened.

‘But Maaji,’ Ammaji came out of the kitchen carrying a tray filled with teacups. ‘If you are going to give eight lakhs as dowry. Then estimating other wedding expenses around three to four lakhs, the whole wedding will cost you around twelve to fourteen lakhs. How do you plan to bear all the expense?’ She was tactless as compared to her husband.

‘You leave it all on me. I will manage,’ she said getting up, her hands going to clutch her knee. The seventy five year old woman was more cunning than they gave her credit for. She did not show her cards so easily. 

‘Where are you going, Maaji? Have some chai?’ Ammaji was disappointed to see Karuna leave. She had only started gathering the fodder for gossip.

‘Nah, some other time. Today Kirti is taking me to an Ayurveda clinic. For knee treatment. If I don’t go home on time, she will give me an earful. I keep telling these kids that this arthritis is this old woman’s friend now.  I have learnt to live with it. Why waste money over me? But they don’t listen.’  She bragged.

‘Yes, yes go then. They care for you so much.’ Ammaji though smiled outwardly but felt jealous of Karuna. 

Carrying the tray back to the kitchen, she slammed it down on the slab.

‘What good fate this woman has,’ she thought. ‘Has a leg hanging in the grave and the grandkids are celebrating birthdays! Ayurvedic massage!?! Huh!’

She had woken up with burning feet and yet here she was standing in the kitchen.Neither her husband nor her sons cared for her. To them, she was a machine that worked round the clock. Neither did they celebrate her birthdays nor did they care about her sufferings.

‘Dadi…Dadi...I am hungry…’ Radha stood at the entrance of the  kitchen.

And here was this girl. Always hungry! ‘If the mother was running away, she should have taken you with her! Did you water the plants?’

The child nodded her head. When she was offered a plate of chapati and pulses, she shook her head. ‘Milk...bread’

‘Milk-bread! Pardon me Your Highness. The Sindhi cows your maternal grandfather had sent on your birthday, I forgot to milk them.’

Radha, used to the behaviour, stuck to the door waiting for her breakfast and buzzed only when she received a plate of bread slices and a bowl full of milk - Mother Dairy Milk. The Sindhi cows, if her grandfather had sent any, must have lost their way to her house. 

XxxX

Karuna bought a hundred grams of green chilies and worth ten rupee coriander leaves from the neighbourhood vegetable store and turned into her alley. 

Ojhas must be thinking she was spreading her legs beyond her bedsheet. Let them underestimate her. All these years, cutting her expenses here and there, she had been saving for Kirti’s marriage. Fortunately, the ancestral lands from her husband’s side that had been caught in dispute over the years, had cleared through, a few years ago. She had lost no time in selling the land and fixing the deposit in the bank. It was unfortunate that the money had not come through when Kirti was in college or Karuna would have provided her with the higher education that Kirti deserved. Nevertheless, she would use this money to give her a befitting husband and house. When she thought of a groom for Kirti, a picture of a boy arose in her mind but she was quick to shake it off.

She had overheard the boy’s and Ojha’s conversation last night. He was beyond her reach. They belonged to old money.  His father - forefathers all had served at high positions. He was a master of such wealth and still possessed equanimity, was grounded  and practiced humility. 

Even if they asked for my daughter, I would not give away my Kirti to them. Marriages were best suited among equals. Tomorrow, she did not want her granddaughter to be taunted for her background.

XxxX

‘Move,’ Kirti ordered and plopped down on the sofa next to her brother who was munching on chips while watching the movie Saajan. She grabbed the packet from his hand and only when she looked into the packet that she realised why he had so easily let her have it. 

‘Did you apologize to Prasanna?’ Throwing away the packet, she asked. She had returned from the Massage Center a few minutes ago. Her grandmother had retired to her room to rest for sometime.

‘What for?’ 

‘You invited her and then ignored her.’

‘She wanted to be left alone and so I did!’ He shrugged.

‘You ass!’ She whacked him on his elbow. ‘What is with this cocky attitude?! Tell me properly what’s going on between you two? Are you playing with her feelings? That’s not how I have raised you.’

‘Playing with her feelings?! Yeah, right!’ 

If there was any play going around it was Prasanna pulling the strings. He was having a hard time dealing with her. He had always been a straightforward guy. He said what he meant. Whereas she talked in riddles and always seemed frustrated with him. She should voice what she wants. Then there was her South Bombay attitude that she tried hard to mask but would always peek in. 

The look that passed through her face when she had first seen his house. Or well meant advices like, ‘You can move to a better place when you land a job. No? Your grandma will be comfortable too.’ Well, they were comfortable now as well. 

‘Your sister can apply in my grandfather’s company if she’s interested.’ He knew she meant well. Still it irked. Her habit of throwing her weight around in everything.

What did she say yesterday? I am not your project! He wasn’t even treating her as a project. He cared for her as one cares for one's dear friend. 

‘Biplab now you’re old enough and I am not going to intrude or poke my nose into your business. But she’s a sensitive girl, Biplab and in reality very lonely. I have felt her need to have someone she can be close to. You are of the same age as her. You both share things of interest. Naturally, there’s friendship and attraction…’ Kirti felt that maybe Prasanna was going to project all of that neediness and feelings on her brother. ‘But don’t forget the huge class difference between us. Handle things delicately and carefully. I trust you to not let me down. Rest, it’s your life.’

‘Di, we don’t have anything going on. We’re just friends.’

‘Yeah sure. Call her and apologize. She looked so grumpy last night.’

‘Why should I call and apologize? I did no wrong.’

‘Still be the older one.’

‘Older one? She is one whole year older than me.’

‘Arrey it was a slip of tongue. I meant.. be the bigger person.’

‘I don’t want to be.’

‘Biplab…’

‘Di, please. Let me watch the movie.’

‘Okay fine.’ She put her head down in his lap and asked him to press her head.

‘Kya hua? Tired?’ He asked.

‘Hmm. Very. The sun was freaking hot and I had to wait in the queue so long. I didn’t know there would be so much crowd in the center.’

‘You should have allowed me to go.’ He patted her head gently.

‘And let my Babu get tanned and in return be cursed by his female admirers?’ She always teased him about those female audiences commenting on his YT.

‘Should I oil your hair?’

‘No, just keep patting it that way and I will fall asleep. No, don't switch off the TV. Just lower the volume and continue with your movie while patting my head.’

XxxX

‘Di?’

‘Kirti, child go in your room. My Nightingale, see who is here.’

‘Go to your room, child if you want to sleep.’

‘Mhmm? Hmm’ Gathering up herself, she walked to her room - in her dream.

‘She was awake till late night busy cleaning the kitchen and the rooms.There was a batch of utensils, all of which she rinsed clean on her own. Would not let me touch a twig. Very stubborn. Then woke up early saying she had to make notes for the classes. She got a new job, you know? Today she took me to this massage clinic for my knees.’ Her grandma was saying.

‘I understand. Must be very tired.’ Kirti heard a whisper in response but was too tired to open her eyes to see who it was. The bed was warm and comfy so she pulled the blanket and covered her face, drifting into a dreamless sleep.

XxxX

‘Kyaa??? So you mean to say that Nishit Aggarwal was here! That he sat right here while on the next sofa I snored away!!’

‘You were not snoring technically. But slept like a log, you did. He sat there for the whole twenty minutes and you didn’t even stir.’

‘But why did you people not wake me up?! Why? WHY??!!’ She groaned.

‘We did not wake you up?! Bwahhhah! Dadi and I kept asking you to wake up so many times but you were dead to the world. Then Nishit said to let you be.’

‘Dadiiiii!!! Biplab I would never talk to you. How can you let a man see your sister like this?! And what is this? Who covered me with this?!’ Kirti threw the thin blanket off her.

‘I did. You were sleeping away so peacefully and the weather had gotten cloudy and crisp so I covered. As for letting him see you, Dadi so many times told you to go to your room, Di.’

‘He saw me like this?! Dadi! I am so embarrassed right now!’ Her skin was prickling and burning. Why did she have to always find herself so compromised around him?!

‘So what? Doesn’t he sleep at home? My child was tired so she was sleeping and this is your house. You can sleep wherever you want to. What is there to be embarrassed about?’ Dadi said.

Kirti threw her head on the back of the sofa and rubbed her face. ‘Right! What is there to be embarrassed about! My home! I can sleep anywhere I want!’ She did not feel confident though and then she remembered something and sprang up the sofa. ‘Wait! Dadi did you tell him that I had been rinsing utensils?’

‘I might have.’ Karuna evaded.

‘Why?! What impression would it leave?’ Kirti groaned again.

‘I don’t know why you are so overreacting?’ Biplab looked at her suspiciously. ‘Why are so bothered about our impression, huh?’ 

Before the wheels of his mind ran in a direction Kirti didn’t want it to, she countered his remark with a question of her own, ‘Why was he here though?’

‘To invite us for a Diwali party. The card is there,’ Biplab pointed towards the shelf where he had placed it after reading it. ‘There is a message for you, I think.’ He whispered into her ears and winked.

‘For me?’

He nodded.

Curious, she walked to the shelf and picked up the card. She read the invitation but there was no special message. Only when she turned the envelope she found the note in his handwriting - ugly handwriting.

Please take care of your personal belongings on your own.  Even though we have taken careful measures of not including helicopters and firecracker lighting incense sticks in our function, the host takes no responsibility for your hair, nose and other precious organs alike. 

Jerk! She felt her lips quiver but suppressed the smile because she saw herself being watched.

‘So are we going? Prasanna also wanted to know.’ 

‘You talked to Prasanna?’

Biplab shrugged in response. ‘Bigger person and all that.’

‘Are we going?’

‘We will see. What do you say Dadi?’

‘The boy came to deliver a card at home. You should definitely.’

‘I am not sure. Let’s see.’

On the day of the function, she was seen drying her hair in the sun after having thoroughly washed and conditioned it. It was when she was scrubbing her face clean that Biplab commented. ‘Looking at your grand preparation, it seems we are going.’ 

Kirti was grateful for the towel that covered the red of her face.

Later in the evening, she kept asking her brother and grandma, ‘I am looking okay, right? Didn’t overdo it, did I?’

‘Come on Di. You know you are looking great. Let’s go now.’

Karuna was kinder. She dabbed a black dot behind her granddaughter’s ear. ‘Let no evil eye catch you.’

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0H8eV__LyY

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