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Hi All!😃
Part 15: Dil Kyun Ye Mera Shor Kare
You just wait and watch. Jaise mujhe pata chal gaya tha ke Raman meri performance dekh raha hai, waise hi mai ye bhi jaanti hoon ke aaj wo saare sawalon ka jawab de dega, my heart was firm in its stand.
--------------To be continued------------------
Mujhe itni jaldi wapas dekh ke kahin chounk to nahi gaye?😉
Well! Iske liye mujhe nahi Pankhuri ko thanks bolo.🤗
I am bound by a promise cannot disclose the reason though.😭
Anyways a quick note for u all...
1#This update is more like a Heart V/S Mind debate. Not sure how much u vl like it but jo bhi hai, yahi hai😛
2#I have used 2 songs in this update.
Dil kyun ye mera shor kare from Kites that goes in the background in sync with Ishita's Heart V/S Mind debate
Dil sambhal jaa zara from Murder 2 that Raman sings for his event
I hope u wont be confused between the two
Here comes the update...
I was always a fine singer so the performance fear wasn't really there.
But of course I was cautious about the fact that it was my first performance at such a huge level and that made me nervous.
I went to the stage with cold feet and started my performance.
And as the performance proceeded, I started losing myself in it.
The nervousness turned into dedication and I sang like there was nobody around.
After my performance ended, I opened my eyes and received the most pleasant shock. I saw few people standing and giving me ovation and heard countless applauds mixed with so many loud 'once more' requests.
I just could not react to the mass reaction I had got for my first grand performance.
My eyes then saw Bala, standing among the crowd and clapping for me.
He looked at me and made an O with his thumb and index finger, mouthing superb.
I blushed at his reaction and came down the stage.
"RKB was right...you are just simply amazing" Bala said when I reached close to him to sit on my seat.
Ofcourse I was happy getting so much praise but my eyes only wanted to look at him and my ears longed to hear appreciation from him, Raman.
Aisa kyun lag raha hai jaise tum yahin ho...
Kahin mere aas paas aur mujhe dekh rahe ho...
I thought while scanning the whole room as I had this nagging feeling that I was being watched by him.
Phir ek galat ishaara diya dil ne I concluded when I didn't find him anywhere around.
Your heart always assumes untrue things...i had warned you but you didn't bother to listen, my mind scolded me.
My mind lashed out at me but I chose to remain quiet as nothing works when my mind and my heart are at war. It is always the safest option to just stay mum and listen to what they have to say when they are at loggerheads or else you might just end up ruining yourself.
I came out of my thoughts when I heard Bala's phone whistling. Expecting the message from Raman, I sneakily glanced at his phone.
And so I was right. The message was from him and I felt like a victory already.
RKB: Thanks buddy...I owe you for this
Bala: itna formal kyun ho raha hai be...tere liye itna nahi kar sakta?
RKB: Aisa nahi hai yaar...I so badly wanted to see her perform...but you know ki main wahan nahi aa sakta tha...tune video banake bheja toh I was able to see her perform...isliye dil se nikla woh thanks
And with that, my heart and my mind started to argue again.
Heart: Dekha maine kaha tha na woh dekh raha hai...waisa hi hua
Mind: Par woh yahan tha toh nahi
Heart: Maine ye kab kaha woh yahan tha...maine kaha ki woh meri performance dekh raha tha aur aisa hi hua...usne dekhi meri performance
Mind: Whatever...it still does not prove that you are always right
Heart: Oh please...stop being a critic
"Ishita"
My mind and heart mutually decided to halt the fight for a while to give some kind attention to Bala when he called me.
"Haan Bala" I looked at him.
"Woh RKB ki performance hai 15 minute mein...Tumhari performnace ab ho gayi hai and you are not required here anymore toh hum chalein? I don't want to miss a bit of it" Bala asked me.
Uff not again, I got irked seeing my heart and mind argue yet again.
These two can never settle at anything common.
Mind: Mat Jao...na kehdo
Heart: Kyun nahi jaaoon?
Mind: Woh bhi toh nahi aaya na dekhne...to mai kyun jaaoon?
Heart: Woh nahi aaya kyunki woh apna vaada nibha raha tha
Mind: In that case even you should live up to your promise that you did to yourself
Heart: What promise?
Mind: Khudko us se dur rakhne ka promise...yaad nahi hai kya?
Heart: Ache se yaad hai par mujhe ek aur promise yaad hai jo maine Raman ko diya tha...khud ko use apnane ka promise agar mujhe laga ki woh mera Raman hai!
Mind: Toh kya tum abhi se maan chuki ho ki woh tumhara Raman hai?
Heart: Yah...no...i mean maybe yes...i am not sure
Mind: You aren't even sure and you want to go ahead with the promise you made to someone else forgetting the promise you made to yourself...a strange person you are really
"Ishitaaa" Bala almost shouted shaking me to bring me out of my trance.
And my shruti box fell down because of the sudden shake.
"Kahan khoyi ho yaar? Chalein hum? RKB ki performance bas shuru hone hi wali hai" Bala asked again.
"Tum chalo. Mujhe apne room me jaana hai. Is se pehle ki mera shruti box kho jaaye ya meri laaparwaahi se toot jaaye main ise room mein rakh deti hoon" I tried to avoid.
"Main saath chalun?" Bala offered help.
"Nahi nahi tum jao. Mai shayad naa bhi aaun. I want to rest a bit" I lied and refused to take help.
"Kho toh nahi jaogi na?" Bala questioned me.
"Kho toh gayi hoon pehle hi" I mumbled inaudibly while shaking my neck in refusal.
"Are you sure...tumhe raasta pata hai?" Bala tried to confirm.
"Raasta toh pata hai bas manzil ka hi pata nahi" I said.
"What?" Bala got confused at my weird replies.
"Kuch nahi...tum jao main apni manzil khud hi dhoond loongi" I assured him while assuring myself indirectly.
"Tum na kisi volunteer se help maang lena in case you lose your way...and yeh sign boards toh hain hi...they can guide you to anywhere you want to go" Bala instructed me and then left while I made my way to the room.
And as soon as my heart and my mind found me lonely, they started it again.
Heart: You are so mean Ishita...Raman didn't come because he was bound to your promise but still he managed to send you his good wishes and even watched your performance...you didn't even bother to wish him good luck...even if it was via Bala, you could have atleast sent him your good wishes.
Mind: Kyun tum Ishita ko ulti patti padhake bhatka rahe ho? Agar usne Bala ke through message bhijwaya hota toh us RKB ne is baat ko bhi green signal le liya hota...phir woh haath dhoke Ishita ke peeche pad jaata...is that all what you want?
Heart: Haan that is what I want...and that's because I lo...
Mind: NO...stop it right there...don't you dare speak a letter ahead...saare fasad ki jad hi woh teen shabd hain jo tum bolne wali thi...so it is better that you keep your mouth shut
Heart: No I won't and don't you dare to stop me
And my heart and mind got almost violent
Ishita tumhe jaana hi chahie...agar aur kuch nahi toh ek schoolmate ki haisiyat se hi chali jao...mat suno itni jyada is dimaag ki...yeh bas tumhe misguide kar raha hai...aur kuch nahi toh kam se kam uska favor return karne hi chali jao...usne bhi toh tumhe wish kiya...tumhara performance dekha...tum bhi chali jaogi toh kya badi baat ho jaegi? I heard my heart repeating the same plea to me again and again.
Dil Kyun Yeh Mera Shor Kare
My heart kept blabbering not letting the mind to utter a word and too complete control over me as I walked to the notice board, not realising what I was doing and not knowing where I was going, I checked the room number where he was to perform and started to walk towards it with the help of sign boards.
Idhar Nahi Udhar Nahi
Teri Ore Chale
Ishita yeh tum thik nahi kar rahi ho wahan jaakar...agar usne tumhe dekh liya toh phir tumhare peeche pad jaega...jis se tumhe bhaagna pad raha hai usi ke paas kyun jaa rahi ho tum...mat jao warna use lagega tumne use apna liya, my mind tried to aware me about the upcoming danger.
Apna liya hai isilie toh jaa rahi hai, my heart defended me.
Apna liya? Itni jaldi? You got to be kidding me!, my mind asked shocked.
No! You got to be kidding me...Kab se to taal hi rahi thi meri baat ko. Ab agar meri baat sunke aage badh rahi us ki taraf to tum kyun rok rahe ho?, my heart boldly asked.
Mai abhi bhi is faisle se khush nahi hoon. Aur bhi bahut kuch jaanna baaki hai uske bare me...kayi sawaal hain jinke jawaab abhi milne baaki hain, my mind expressed its concern.
Usse doori banaye rakhne se to ye jawab nahi milne wale na? Paas jaake malum karne se hi milenge. Un jawabon ke khatir hi sahi, jaao Ishita, my heart gave me another excuse to which my mind had to give up though unwillingly.
And upon getting consent from both my mind and my heart, I rushed towards the room and settled down on a seat much far from his vision so that he remained unaware of my presence.
Zara yeh toh pata chale ke itni dur is kone mein baithne se kaise jawaab mil jayenge...Huhhh!, my mind mocked at me.
Kaise? Kyun? Ye sab mujhe nahi pata. Bas itna pata hai ke aaj sab saaf ho jayega...saare sawalon ke jawab milenge, my heart showed some confidence.
Itna confidence kaise kam se kam ye to pata chale, My mind taunted.
You just wait and watch. Jaise mujhe pata chal gaya tha ke Raman meri performance dekh raha hai, waise hi mai ye bhi jaanti hoon ke aaj wo saare sawalon ka jawab de dega, my heart was firm in its stand.
Alright then! Agar is baar bhi tum sahi nikle toh main surrender kar dunga aur kabhi dobara behas nahi karunga, my mind promised.
Great! Der hi sahi tum samjhe toh, my heart praised my mind sarcastically.
Itni jaldi celebrate mat karo please!Abhi bhi mujhe confidence hai ki tum galat ho sakte ho, my mind gave back with equal sarcasm.
My heart was ready to give another heated answer but thankfully just then RKB ascended the stage and started playing the guitar shutting up both my heart and my mind.
As his fingers started playing the strings of the guitar, I felt the strings of heart being played too and I just could not stop myself from adoring him.
My mind and my heart continued to chatter but I chose to ignore them both and kept looking at him in awe without blinking my eyes even for a second.
And just then suddenly he raised his eyes from his guitar and looked straight into my eyes.
His eyes emitted surprise, happiness and intense pain, all three at the same time and with that my mind lost its voice.
Zara Der Mein Yeh Kya Ho Gaya
Nazar Milte Hi Kahan Kho Gaya
"Jab Jab Tere Paas Main Aaya
Ek Sukoon Mila"
He started to sing to present his current state to me.
"Jise Main Tha Bhoolta Aaya
Woh Wajood Mila"
He continued as if he was telling me that after meeting me, he has got back his identity as Raman which he had lost to RKB long time back.
See Ishita he loves you so much...uska sukoon tumse hai...usne apna wajood tumse paaya hai, my heart chirpily affirmed.
Don't jump to conclusions already...woh sirf aaj ki baat kar raha hai...us beete kal ka kya jise usne tumhare bina jiya hai? Kya usne bhi tumhe usi tarah yaad kiya jaise tumne use har saans ke saath yaad kiya hai? my mind put forward its views.
"Jab Aaye Mausam Gham Ke
Tujhe Yaad Kiya
Jab Sehme Tanhapan Se
Tujhe Yaad Kiya"
RKB answered to the questions my mind had raised.
Maine na kaha tha woh tumse bahut pyaar karta hai...usne humesha tumhe bahut pyaar kiya hai warna kyun dukh aur tanhaai mein tumhe yaad karta, my heart gushed happily.
Tum to chup hi raho...Tum to bas ek smile se hi pighal jati ho...jisne ek baar dil toda usi ko phir se apna dil saump dena, yeh kahan ki akalmandi hai, my mind presented its next appeal.
"Dil Sambhal Jaa Zara
Phir Mohabbat Karne Chala Hai Tu
Dil Yahin Ruk Jaa Zara
Phir Mohabbat Karne Chala Hai Tu"
RKB sang my mind's warning to my heart.
See he too warned you the same thing as me, my mind replied smugly this time whilethe heart chose to remain silent having nothing to say in defence.
Akhir aisa kyun hai ki uske pyaar ko apnane se pehle mujhe ek baar nahi do baar nahi anginat baar sochna pad raha hai? I sadly questioned both my heart as well as my mind.
"Aisa Kyun Kar Hua
Jaanu Na Main Jaanu Na"
When the heart and mind kept mum, I knew that they did not have an answer for my question. And here RKB too admitted that he did not know the reason either. This left me totally disheartened.
Maana ke wo nahi jaanta ke aisa kyun hua. Par zara ye to bataye ke wo us waqt kya kar raha tha jab tum usse door thi...Agar usne tumhe yaad kiya hi tha to kabhi milne ki koshish bhi karta...Kam se kam ye jaanne ki koshish karta ke tum ho kahan , my mind tried to take advantage of my state.
"Jis Raah Pe Hai Ghar Tera
Aksar Wahan Se Haan Main Hoon Guzra
Shayad Yahi Dil Mein Raha
Tu Mujhko Mil Jaaye Kya Pata
Kya Hai Yeh Silsila
Jaanu Na Main Jaanu Na"
RKB handled my mind's instigation well.
I hope that answers your questions!!! Are you satisfied now? Ya abhi bhi hai kuch jaanne ko? my heart mocked the cynical behaviour of my mind.
I know he has answered it all...But phir bhi tumahre liye mera advice yahi hai ke
"Dil Sambhal Jaa Zara
Phir Mohabbat Karne Chala Hai Tu"
My mind again warned.
Excuse me! Tum hi ne kaha tha na ke agar is baar mera dil sahi nikla to tum dobara argue nahi karoge? Ab apne waade se mukar kyun rahe ho? I complained to my mind.
Stop being foolish Ishita...Jab ctumhare beeh sab khatam ho chuka hai, to dobara kyun koshish kar rahi ho use paane ki, my mind remained adamant refusing to budge from its point.
Agar sab kuch khatam ho hi chuka hai toh aaj bhi kyun woh mere khwaabon mein aata hai?
Maana ke yeh dil ka kasoor hai ke aaj tak uske hi khwab bunta hai.
Par yaad karna ya na karna ye to tumhara kaam hai na?
Phir tum kyun nahi bhula paaye uski yaadon ko?
Dil se toh tum ladte ho par khud bhi toh yaad sirf usi ko karte ho...
I started to argue and question my mind this time taking the role of my heart.
"Kuch Bhi Nahi Hai Jab Darmiyaan
Phir Kyun Hai Dil Tere Hi Khwaab Bunta
Chaha Ki De Tujhko Bhula
Par Yeh Bhi Mumkin Ho Na Sakaa
Kya Hai Yeh Maamla
Jaanu Na Main Jaanu Na"
RKB continued to sing indirectly supporting me and completed the song.
And as the performance ended, my mind started to accept its defeat slowly.
For the first time ever in my whole life, I saw a judge going on the stage to pat the participant's back. He was lucky enough to get this honor and he deserved every inch of it.
While the entire crowd was celebrating his performance, I was too occupied in my dilemma of love that I just forgot to pay any attention to his performance.
Bheed Mein Logon Ki Woh Hai Wahan
Aur Pyaar Ke Mele Mein
Akela Kitna Hoon Main Yahan
Bas karo Ishita!!!!
Ab bahut hogaya...aur kitna time chahiye tumhe?
Aur kitna samjhaana padega tumhe?
Woh ek ke baad ek tumhe apne pyaar ke saboot diye jaa raha hai aur tum ho ki supreme court ke judge ki tarah 'evidence not valid' kehke reject kiye jaa rahi ho...
Ab bas...ab main kisi ki nahi sunungi...
Na is dimag ki jo zarurat se zyada samajhdaar banne ki koshish mein hai aur naa hi tumhari jo sab kuch samajhke bhi na samajh ban rahi ho...
I am saying it loud and clear that he is my Raman and I love him, my heart gave its final and a strict verdict.
Shuru Ho Gayi Kahani Meri
Mere Dil Ne Baat Na Maani Meri
Bahut pareshan kar liya khud ko aur dusron ko...Ab iske baad koi bhi cheez tumhe Raman ko apnane se nahi rok sakti, my heart deduced.
Hadd Se Bhi Aage Yeh Badhi Hi Gaya
Khud Bhi Pareshaan Hua
Aur Mujhko Bhi Yeh Kar Gaya
Ishita usne apna wada poora kiya...
Ab tumhari baari hai...
"Jis din mera dil yeh pukarke kahega ki tum hi mere Raman ho main khud ko nahi rokungi...tumhe apna loongi" yahi kaha tha na tumne?
my heart taunted me.
To ab jaao aur keh do us se ke
"Tum mere dil se jaa na sake
Tum meri yaadon se jaa na sake
TUM MERE KHWABON SE JAA NA SAKE"
Ab aapke dil aur dimag me kya chal raha hai?
Agar dil se is update ko pasand kiya hai to apne dimag ka istemal karke kuch achhi achi batein likh dijiye😳
PS: The itching to create a new thread after Pg 130 is irresistible😛
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