.:.Manzil.:. MOVED (Read 19) - Page 9

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nitu07 thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#81
hey suhana welcome back🤗
wow suhana this was a really great chapter indeed!!😉
feeling bad for david and carissa though ....wow!! I just noticed that u said that Maryam's dad gave priority to his job...aww poor Maryam....U described almost like all characters
I loved this chapter...and as always eagerly waiting for the next one 😳
Edited by nitu07 - 18 years ago
SuhanaSafar thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#82

Originally posted by: nitu07

hey suhana welcome back🤗
wow suhana this was a really great chapter indeed!!😉
feeling bad for david and carissa though ....wow!! I just noticed that u said that Maryam's dad gave priority to his job...aww poor Maryam....U described almost like all characters
I loved this chapter...and as always eagerly waiting for the next one 😳

Thanks Nitu! I included David and Carissa's problem as an example of a situation both people can be at fault in a relationship. These type of conflicts can only be resolved if both of them admit that they were wrong. Let's see if that ever happens w/ David and Carissa...

I'm posting the next chapter now!

SuhanaSafar thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#83

Here's the next chapter! I've also added stuff to the first post. There are new character pics and one of the pics has been changed. Please check it out. Looking forward to feedback on this new chapter. Thanks for reading.

Chapter 10

The auditorium was large and circular with enough seats for at least 500 audience members, but at that time, all the seats were empty. Rehan was standing at the edge of the stage watching as the twenty dancers on stage repeated the moves he had just taught them. Abruptly, the Hindi music changed into a piano symphony and the dancers were twirling on the stage wearing ballet costumes. Before Rehan had time to react, one of the dancers spun out of control towards the edge of the stage. Rehan grabbed her arm, and she stopped spinning. He realized that it was Samira. She stared at him for a second, and then began crying uncontrollably.

Rehan: Kya hua Samira? Tum ro kyoon rahi ho? What happened, Samira? Why are you crying?

Samira: Woh mujhe maarna chaahta hai! Woh mujhe maar daalega. Mujhe bachaalo Rehan! Please! He wants to kill me! He's going to kill me. Please save me, Rehan! Please!

Rehan: Yeh tum kya keh rahi ho. Kaun maarna chaahta hai tumhen? I don't understand. Who wants to kill you?

Suddenly there was a scream in the first row of the audience. Rehan turned around and saw Sabah and Amaan sitting there.

Sabah: Samira, Rehan tumhen nahin bacha sakta. Woh to Simon ko bhi nahin bacha paaya tha! Samira, Rehan can't save you. He wasn't even able to save Simon!

Amaan (pointing at Rehan): Aap ki wajah se Simon ki jaan gayi hai! It was your fault that Simon died!

Rehan stood there, shocked at this allegation. A black shadow crept across the stage and before Rehan knew it, Samira was being sucked into it. He reached out his hand to grab hers, but before he could, the floor beneath him had melted away. Rehan was falling faster and faster down a spiral until…he hit something soft and fuzzy.

He opened his eyes and found himself lying in his bed out of breath with his fleece blanket in a tangled mess under his arm. It had only been a dream.

It was nine o'clock on Sunday morning and the sun was beaming brightly at him from the open window. Soni was purring at the foot of his bed. He had slept in, but still felt tired, as if someone had drained all the energy out of him.

Rehan sat up in his bed and began thinking about his dream. He knew exactly why he was having these nightmares. Somewhere deep inside, he still considered himself partially responsible for Simon's death. But that was ridiculous! Rehan had tried his best to save Simon. Still, he couldn't help thinking that maybe…maybe he could have done something differently.

His thoughts were disrupted by a knock on the door.

Rehan: Come in.

His father walked into the room.

Zaheer: Arre Rehan, tum abhi tak nahin uthe? Naashta tayyar hai. Jaldi se neeche aa jaao. Rehan, you're still not up? Breakfast is ready. Come down soon.

Rehan: Okay, Daddy.

When his father left, Rehan pulled himself out of bed and into the shower. Twenty minutes later, the Akhtar family was seated around the dining table eating stuffed parathas with yogurt.

Sabah: Mummy, Yusuf Bhai ne aapse kuch baat ki? Mummy, did you talk to Yusuf Bhai?

The whole family was anxiously waiting for Yusuf and Aisha to agree to the marriage so that everyone could start planning the wedding.

Fatima: Abhi nahin. Give them some time. Akhir woh apni zindagi ka faisla karne jaa rahe hain. Not yet. Give them some time. After all, this decision will affect their lives.

Rehan smiled. He wondered if everyone would be as excited when he got married or was it just a first time thing. Whatever it was, Rehan really hoped that things would work out between Yusuf and Aisha.

Sabah and Rehan spent most of that morning and afternoon testing each other on vocabulary words likely to appear on the SAT exam. There was only a month left until the test, and neither of them felt very confident about the verbal section.

Around 11 AM, Rehan looked outside the window and noticed Amaan practicing soccer techniques with another guy around his age. Rehan was sure that he had never seen him before but was very impressed with his skills. In fact, he was one of the best soccer players Rehan had ever seen. He wanted to watch them play for longer, but Sabah insisted that they continue studying.

When Rehan and Sabah came downstairs to eat lunch around 2 PM, Amaan and his friend were eating leftover parathas at the table. Amaan introduced his friend as "Faisal, the Fremont High soccer superstar."

They all ate, and Rehan asked Faisal some questions about his soccer history. At 2:15, Faisal noticed the time and jumped out of his seat.

Faisal: It's 2:15 already! I'm sorry, I have to leave. I'm late for something.

Amaan: Where do you have to go at this time on a Sunday?

Faisal: I have something to do.

Sabah: I can give you a ride.

Faisal: No! Um…no thanks. I have my bike. Thanks for lunch Amaan. See you next week.

And with that, he was out the door before anyone could ask him anything.

Sabah: What's up with him?

Amaan: No idea. Yehi to main pata lagaane ki koshish kar raha hoon. No idea. That's what I'm trying to figure out.

Rehan: Kuch to chhupa raha hai. He's definitely hiding something.

Amaan: Haan, mujhe lagta hai iski life mein koyi badi problem hai, and I want to help him. Lekin jab tak woh mujhe kuch bataayega nahin, main kya kar sakta hoon? Yeah, I think there's some major problem in his life, and I want to help him. But until he tells me what's wrong, what can I do?

The phone rang in the living room and Sabah went to answer it.

Rehan: Don't worry, Amaan. Ek baar woh tum pe poori tarah se bharosa karne lage, to tumhen sab kuch bata dega. Don't worry Amaan. Once he trusts you completely, he'll reveal everything.

Amaan: Haan, bharosa to bahut zaroori hota hai. Waise lagta hai meri family ko mujh pe bharosa nahin hai. Is liye kuch aise raaz hain jo mere alaava sab jaante hain. Yes, trust is very important. You know, it seems like my own family doesn't trust me. That's why there are some secrets that everyone knows except me.

Amaan quickly left the room leaving Rehan shocked and confused. What was Amaan talking about? Was it possible that he had found out the truth about Simon's death? Rehan felt guilty for hiding something so important from his brother, but he had a good reason.

When Sabah returned, Rehan decided to forget about the issue for the time being. Very soon, he would tell Amaan the whole truth.

The next morning, as soon as they arrived at school, Rehan and Samira looked for David in order to try to resolve things between him and Carissa. They found him sitting alone in the main quad. There were still ten minutes until the bell, so they decided to talk to him then.

Samira: Hey, can we sit here?

David: Sure.

Samira and Rehan sat next to him.

Samira: Carissa told me a little about what happened between you two. She really wants to work things out.

David: I'm not sure things can be worked out.

Samira: David, you guys have been together for years. Carissa made a mistake, and she acknowledges that. Is it really worth throwing away your relationship?

David: I don't know. I just didn't expect her to ignore my feelings like that.

Rehan: Maybe you're expecting too much. She has the right to make her own decisions.

David: Rehan, things are not that simple. You've never been in a relationship, so I don't think you understand.

Rehan: I may not have been a relationship, but I understand what they require. My parents have been a perfect example. I've always wondered what makes their marriage so successful, and ultimately decided that it's the mutual respect. My dad treats my mom as an equal, and they always make decisions together. Maybe if you had talked to Carissa about your feelings openly instead of commanding her not to go, she would have been more understanding.

David thought about this for a minute.

David: You do have a point, but Carissa knows how Mike is. Shouldn't she have just accepted that I was trying to protect her?

Samira: She does accept that, and that's why she regrets what she did. She just got angry because she doesn't want to be told what to do. Can't you at least give her a chance to explain it herself?

David: I'll think about it.

Rehan: I guess that's the best we can do, Samira. Let's go. The bell's about to ring.

Samira: See you at lunch, David.

David: Yea…thanks for the advice guys.

As Rehan walked to class with Samira, he hoped that their advice would lead David to give the relationship a second chance.

Edited by .:.Suhana.:. - 17 years ago
Monika__29 thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#84
wicked chapter suhana!!i wonder if Amaan is going to find out the truth soon.even i want to know who Simon was and how he died!great work and keep up the good writing! 😉
Monika__29 thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#85

who are all the new characters added on the first page? Have they been entered yet cause there are so many and i don tknow half of them plee clear this up and bye! Rehan must have been🥺 when simon died!

Can we have a pic of him or isnt he a important person in da story

Edited by Monika__29 - 18 years ago
SuhanaSafar thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#86

Originally posted by: Monika__29

who are all the new characters added on the first page? Have they been entered yet cause there are so many and i don tknow half of them plee clear this up and bye! Rehan must have been🥺 when simon died!

Can we have a pic of him or isnt he a important person in da story

Sorry for the confusion. Actually most of the characters on the first page have already entered, but I mentioned some of them very briefly. I'm sure you know the characters from the Rehman and Akhtar families already, so I'll just clarify about the "others". Below is a list of where they were mentioned. If anyone has anymore questions, feel free to ask. I don't want any confusion about my story.

About Simon, I will add his picture soon, but first I want to clarify the mystery behind who he was. From what I posted so far, he could range from a baby to an old man. Once its clear who he was, I will post his picture.

Characters:

Carissa: Samira's best friend. Chp 1, Chp 9, Chp 10

David: Carissa's boyfriend. Chp 1, Chp 9, Chp 10

Anne: Maryam's best friend. Tutored by Imraan. Chp 3, Chp 4

Rahul: Rehan's best friend. Desi Club Vice President. Chp 5, Chp 9

Nisha: Sabah's classmate. Desi Club Secretary. Chp 5, Chp 9

Anjali: Nisha's younger sister. Chp 5 (Very brief mention)

Faisal: Amaan's strange friend. The soccer star. Chp 7, Chp 10

Hasan: Someone from Aisha's past. Chp 6, Chp 8

Radhika: Aisha's roommate. (hasn't been mentioned yet, but she has been Aisha's roommate for two years)

Jason: Yusuf's roommate. Chp 8

Jyoti: Samira's classmate. Desi Club president. Chp 9

-Navi thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#87
SUHANI :),

finally all caught up !
woow, i love reading this !
cannot wait for the next chapters :D
Adi''s_GirL thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#88
reserving this spot for my review... will read ur story wen my midterms are
finally over! 😃
afreen_786 thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#89
grt chapter
wonder who simon is how she died.
post da next chapter soooon
nitu07 thumbnail
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Posted: 18 years ago
#90
wow!! i loved the new twist 😳
I hope everything works out between carissa and david!!
as always ....a great chapter😉

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