FF:Once again(Raghu Tapasya)PART 11 Pg17

PART 1

This is not a love story, but it is about love.

Raghu met her long time ago. It was Raghu who took the first step of any kind of relation with her.She was confused. Because of her life, it was messed up badly, very badly. At that transitory state of life,Raghu met her. It was in destiny, else there was no such reason or connection. But a contact built up between them.

Then,Raghu left her.Clueless and more confused,that can be said about her state of mind then.She didn't even complain.Just let him go..after wishing him all the best in life."Why you did this to me?"..it was not asked by her,which was a very expected and fair question and reaction.Raghu expected it too.But she surprised Raghu.She never questioned.

It's not that she loved Raghu too much to question,it was not about Raghu..it was her nature.She never questioned anybody.People can do what they wish,so could she,and she did according to her wish.

Once Raghu said,"You love me?"..she only made a deep sigh.Raghu still can remember her cold attitude towards him.As if she was made of ice,but it was not like that,several times Raghu felt the firy part in her,but that wasn't for Raghu.

"Marry me",once Raghu said to her.."I want to be with you,take care of you,it seems you need that very badly"..she only smiled.

"Let me talk to your father,about us.."..Raghu suggested.She said "Let's see what happens..you are saying so much,I would like to see your action,whether you really mean what you say or not.."

"What does that mean?"..Raghu said with shock,"Just because I never chased you like a Romeo,I don't roam here and there with you,that doesn't mean I lack seriousness.I am serious about you.I see my life,my entire future with you..I mean it.."…she gave her reaction in form of .."Hmmm"…

"I love you…"..Raghu said to her..many times.."You have great difficulty to say the same to me..right?Either you don't love that much..or you love to torture me ,what is it..say it..I want the truth…"..

"It's not all about saying,it's about keeping those words,those promises,those pledges made in a relation,why we waste all energy in saying,let's preserve it for the real action time,when it will be needed to face the world,then we will need this energy to answer many questions.."..she answered.

This kind of answer attracted Raghu more towards her.This attitude made her more desirable to Raghu.He fantasised about her in his nights.Every time he talked to her,he met her,feelings,desires stirred him up.

Tapasya,her name is Tapasya.Raghu's desire,dream,destiny.

"Response Tapasya,please,why aren't you kissing me back?Is it hurting you,or right now you are not in a mood of kiss?What is the matter?"..Raghu asked..when he found Tapasya's lips like ice cubes in his mouth.They were in Raghu's car.Tapasya was silent,Raghu was disappointed.

"Listen,after our marriage,no more Ichha..okay?She must not visit our house frequently,whenever I call you,Ichha is there,she sleeps in your bed..why? Well.. never mind,not for more days,you will be with me,now ,will you give me a good night kiss over phone?"..Raghu asked with great enthusuaism .

"You know,till now I really didn't care about my life,but now I do,as you are in my life,you must not suffer because of me.."..Tapasya replied…

"Thank you very much Miss Tapasya Thakur,finally you admit that I am in your life, you can't see my suffering..that's so big of yours.."..Raghu said..

Before cutting the line Raghu got a good night kiss over phone .

Tapasya came to know about Veer,Veer Singh Bundela.Another elite of Rajput clan.A good match for Jogi Thakur's daughter.Veer looked nice,posh,regal and gentle.Of course he was.But Tapasya wasn't inclined to be with him.She might have shown coldness to Raghu,but inside her mind she was fully attached to Raghu.They say in a relation the one who less cares has more weitage and power over another one.Tapasya was applying this theory on Raghu.She never wanted Raghu to measure her weakness towards him.

Raghavendra Paratap Rathore.A rich guy with a good taste.Obviously he chose Tapasya Thakur.The more she showed coldness,the more Raghu got determined to be with her.Tapasya said one thing very right.Love is not only about saying "I love you"..true love needs action,in difficult time we can know how much true that love is.Raghu said "I love you"..just to say..he himself knew too little about his own mind.How much of his saying he really meant,possibly he didn't know that.

He saw Tapasya in a resturant one day,for the first time.Tapasya was there with Ichha.Ichha of out of focus for Raghu.He was only seeing Tapasya.A perfect face, sharp nose,rose petal lips,perfectly drawn eye brows with a pair of very,very expressive eyes.Deep ,intense,calm but provocative eyes.Raghu couldn't wait to introduce himself with that girl with beautiful eyes.

"Excuse me Madam,that man in white shirt,sent you this.."..Waitress gave a note to Tapasya.

"Your eyes are mindblowing,can I observe them from a close viscinity?"..Tapasya read and saw the handwritting.

Ichha said.."What is it?What is written?Which guy?"

Waitress gave a note to Raghu..Raghu read.."Come tomorrow ,same time,same place for a close view of my eyes"….unexpected,very rare.Usually girls react as "GO TO HELL".."HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR FACE IN MIRROR?".."GHAR ME MAA BAHEN NAHI HAI KYA?".But the answer Raghu got on his first attempt,Raghu was really surprised,shocked and over all..happy..very happy.

"She will be mine.."..Raghu said to himself.He felt an urge to get her .He must get that girl.No matter what.She is only his.

Tapasya didn't involve Ichha in that case.She didn't want to.Once she became friend with her,but later she began to feel that Ichha had snatched her rights and love of her father,Jogi Thakur.Tapasya wanted Ichha as a friend,not as a sister.Jogi Thakur had his own reason to give equal love to Ichha.Though Ichha never crossed Tapasya's way,but still,Tapasya had made a safe distance with Ichha from her teenage days.Ichha can get whatever she wants..but she is not allowed to enter in Tapasya's world of thought.She can't enter into Tapasya's personal matters.In the resturant also,if Ichha hadn't asked any question,Tapasya might have torn the note into pieces or slapped that guy for this incident.But when Ichha asked about it, Tapasya decided to play along.As a result she fixed an appointment with that guy for some observation.

As it has been mentioned earlier,it is not a love story,but yes,it is about love.

Originally posted by: trupat

I like ur story so far sounds interesting like the way u described tapu's character nice thank u for sharing this with us

Things and days were passing in this way .Tapasya and Raghu met again in that resturant. This time,Raghu really had a close view of Tapasya.Which made him more and more desiring. Impulsive,possessive,aggressive.Tapasya was fine either way.Raghu was falling for her,good for Raghu,Raghu was not falling for her,good for Tapasya.The bottom line was,Tapasya was having a good time.One and only person who would not enquire about Ichha was Raghu. Which was a feel good factor for Tapasya.Tapasya was least bothered about Raghu's family and was least interested about people.She thought,if Raghu was really serious about her,one day the family will come in the scene naturally.If Raghu was playing along,then why should she spend her energy in worrying about Raghu's family and their opinion?

Raghu claimed with a loud voice that he was in love,but deep inside ,somehow he knew that he was not honest ,not to Tapasya ,not even to himself.

Raghu was also from a rich and affluent Rajput family,he got ancestrol property and wealth, which he knew very well how to protect .Before Tapasya,there were no such connection with any other girl,Tapasya was the first girl whom Raghu gave full attention.He confessed it to Tapasya.It really didn't matter to Tapasya whether Raghu was telling the truth or not.

Raghu and Tapasya made their own world.They used to meet,went to long drive,sometime ate in posh restaurants,sometime in roadside dhaba.They were dating.Raghu acted all time as a lover who never left any chance to kiss Tapasya.In the way of long drive,or when they used to take a walk along the Marine Drive,Raghu was following the path of other lovers. Tapasya wasn't encouraging him at all.Raghu felt Tapasya might be shy in public place. So,Raghu started to buy miltiplex tickets where movie watching was just an excuse.In the darkness of the movie theatre Raghu got more chance to get intimate with Tapasya. Somehow Tapasya was at her ease in the darkness.Raghu was getting response in his kisses,in darkness, Tapasya's lips were lips..not ice cubes.They got intimate as much people can get intimate in a dark cinema hall.

Raghu was keen to take the relation one more step ahead as he requested Tapasya to come to his house where he was living with a gang of servants.Where nobody was to interfere in Raghu's personal matters.No one was to knock at the closed door of Raghu's bedroom without Raghu's permission.Why should they go to a hotel when a big and safe house was there to get more intimate?

This time,Tapasya couldn't remain that cold .Now she spoke,rather demanded.She said,"Isn't marriage is the safest way to get intimate?Why should I or you have a bad impression on your servants?Why you think about hotel?If we get married then we can do whatever we want,wherever we want,whenever we want.."..

Once Raghu himself talked about marriage,but when Tapasya said about it,Raghu became silent,he was taken aback a bit.

Tapasya went on,"I can talk to my parents about you..you just have to come and propose the marriage in front of them,they must find you attractive and eligible..you are nice,smart,good looking,rich,you are also Rajput like us,once you meet my parents,I don't think they will have any problem with you."

Raghu was looking at her,"What?"..Tapasya said..

"Nothing,you never said it like today,I mean ,like you are suggesting,you seem to be serious about us.."Raghu said.

"Aren't you serious?"..Tapasya said.

"Yes..I am.Let me see,when I can meet your parents..but you will stand beside me in front of them..right?I will be there to ask for your hand and you just denied and declined me..don't do that,if you have that kind of thoughts,tell me now.."..Raghu said.

"No..I am not going to do that,well,if you want to leave me,if you want to move on in your life,if you are not interested to marry me,say that,I won't feel bad.."..Tapasya said.

"You won't feel bad?"..Raghu said it..and kept staring at Tapasya with a blank gaze.."Why won't you feel bad Tapasya if I leave you?"

"Well,if you really leave me,and I feel bad,then you will come back to me?If you really want to leave me then whatever I feel,does that make any difference to you?"..Tapasya said'

Suddenly Raghu had to go to England.Work purpose.

"I will be back ,as soon as possible.."..Raghu said Tapasya ,when she came to see him off.

"You better be back soon,my father is meeting a family for my marriage,the guy's name is Veer Singh Bundela,he has visited several times to meet me"..Tapasya said.

"You are saying it now?Anyways, tell you father to wait..and I really have to go this time,wait for me,I will be back soon."..Raghu said in a anxious tone.

And they said goodbye to each other.

Tapasya came back to his house,Jogi Thakur couldn't find the reason of avoiding the Veer issue by Tapasya.Tapasya said nothing about Raghu to his father.

Three months passed.Raghu used to call ,everytime he said that he would be back soon.

Somewhere in her mind Tapasya started to feel that Raghu was saying just for the sake of saying.She told nothing to her parents as she started to grow a fear that Raghu might not show up in front of Thakur family in time.Why should she create a chaos for that guy who was not even in India to meet her parents?

One day Raghu called in a devastated tone,his buisness was going through a bad phase.He just said,"Don't spoil your life for me,do as you think right,if we are destined to be together,one day we will be,right now I can't tell you to wait for me."

Tapasya said,"What will I say to my father,I have tell him to wait,now you are telling this..!!"

Raghu said in a melancholic tone ,"Then do as he says..I am finished,I have a blank brain now,can't think anything now.."

Tapasya said nothing further.She understood that Raghu wasn't interested in her anymore. Whatever the reason may be,but Raghu wasn't coming.She questioned nothing.She complained nothing.She just let it be.

For Tapasya,Raghavendra Rathore was a closed chapter now.

All she remembered,those empty vows,empty promises Raghu made to her.She remembered their meetings.All were nothing but lie.She came to a conclusion that Raghu was interested only in physical intimacy.When Tapasya declined to go to his empty house Ragu understood that his intensions were not going to be fulfilled.And he left India and now he is avoiding Tapasya with these cheap excuses.Tapasya thought who cares..but deep in her mind she cared.A lot. Did Raghu ever love Tapasya?It was her question.But she never ask this question to Raghu.

She realised that it wasn't only Raghu's fault.She was equally guilty.She never showed her heart to him.

One can't live without anyone,that only happens in novels and fictions..it's not reallity.Last sentence said by Raghu.Tapasya remembered that sentence and made that by heart.Now she opened her eyes towards the other part of world where Veer Singh Bundela resides.

There Tapasya found that Veer was coming to Thakur House,not for Tapasya,but for Ichha.In her absense,that bond was made.Veer was in love with Ichha.Again Tapasya said,let it be.It wasn't their fault.It was not an unnatural thing to take place.

Family feud started over Veer-Ichha alliance.Bundela family raised a big objection.Jogi Thakur was clueless.Tapasya was more clueless and confused about her life.Divya,her mother, scolded her hugely for ignoring Veer.Tapasya said ,"What happened I can't change,neither I can marry Veer,that will be a big blunder,you convince Bundelas to accept Ichha,everything will be alright by passing time."