A wife's dilemma: Questions galore

“Enough Pati babu. You want me to understand my self-worth and not to come after you after multiple rejections. But can’t you see the relation you are claiming as null and void is the basis of the place I carved for myself in this house. You want me to understand my rights as a woman in society, but by removing your name from mine, what rights I will have over this house and family that I have come to love as mine. If I am not your wife, can I treat your kaka as my kaka sasur ji? Can I call Som dada as dada and tease Batuk as his boudi? With what rights I will perform durga maa’s aarti or make arrangements for any puja or event in the house? Can I sit as a family member rwhile dining? By not being your wife, I will lose the right to be the bahu,boudi and choti malkin of this house.

Leave everything aside. How can I stay in your room or sleep in your bed? How can I enter your study without permission or demand roshgulle from you? Do you think I can share my confusions with you or bombard you with questions with the same ease if I get to know I am nothing but a zimmedari you brought home? Till date, I thought as your wife I have the right to be in your room, come to you at any point of time and demand anything from you. I am so proud to have a husband like you. Now, if you claim me as a zimmedari, all that you have done for me will be deemed as a favor. Don’t you think it will hurt my self-respect that my previous year was nothing but favors bestowed upon me by you?

You might say nothing changes, Bondita. Of course it doesn’t for you, because from the day this marriage happened, it was clear that whatever you do, it will be out of responsibility. But I was oblivious to the truth of our marriage. I thought everything you did was out of concern and love for me, which I thought is my right to have as your wife.

If this is indeed the truth, why didn’t you stop kaka sasurji when he gave me the jewelry that belongs to the eldest bahu of this house? Why did you let me sit beside you and perform puja as your wife? Why did you let me stay in your room? You could put me in servant quarters as well. It doesn’t violate your promise to take responsibility for me and the truth, when revealed would have hurt me less and my self-respect wouldn’t have taken a big blow. Why did you say Bondita is my patni multiple times in front of everyone without being specific as sirf zimmedari wali patni? You knew the definition that was ingrained into me about marriage and husband then why didn’t you clear it out the first time you called me as your wife or I called you pati babu. You want me to stand up for myself, for my self-respect, but its tattered into pieces under the weight of your favors.”

If Bon does this rant to her pati babu, I think she will get all her fears out of her system and Ani will get a picture of what's going on in her head.

Chappals are allowed.

Originally posted by: pratyay

“Enough Pati babu. You want me to understand my self-worth and not to come after you after multiple rejections. But can’t you see the relation you are claiming as null and void is the basis of the place I carved for myself in this house. You want me to understand my rights as a woman in society, but by removing your name from mine, what rights I will have over this house and family that I have come to love as mine. If I am not your wife, can I treat your kaka as my kaka sasur ji? Can I call Som dada as dada and tease Batuk as his boudi? With what rights I will perform durga maa’s aarti or make arrangements for any puja or event in the house? Can I sit as a family member rwhile dining? By not being your wife, I will lose the right to be the bahu,boudi and choti malkin of this house.

Leave everything aside. How can I stay in your room or sleep in your bed? How can I enter your study without permission or demand roshgulle from you? Do you think I can share my confusions with you or bombard you with questions with the same ease if I get to know I am nothing but a zimmedari you brought home? Till date, I thought as your wife I have the right to be in your room, come to you at any point of time and demand anything from you. I am so proud to have a husband like you. Now, if you claim me as a zimmedari, all that you have done for me will be deemed as a favor. Don’t you think it will hurt my self-respect that my previous year was nothing but favors bestowed upon me by you?

 

You might say nothing changes, Bondita. Of course it doesn’t for you, because from the day this marriage happened, it was clear that whatever you do, it will be out of responsibility. But I was oblivious to the truth of our marriage. I thought everything you did was out of concern and love for me, which I thought is my right to have as your wife.

If this is indeed the truth, why didn’t you stop kaka sasurji when he gave me the jewelry that belongs to the eldest bahu of this house? Why did you let me sit beside you and perform puja as your wife? Why did you let me stay in your room? You could put me in servant quarters as well. It doesn’t violate your promise to take responsibility for me and the truth, when revealed would have hurt me less and my self-respect wouldn’t have taken a big blow. Why did you say Bondita is my patni multiple times in front of everyone without being specific as sirf zimmedari wali patni? You knew the definition that was ingrained into me about marriage and husband then why didn’t you clear it out the first time you called me as your wife or I called you pati babu. You want me to stand up for myself, for my self-respect, but its tattered into pieces under the weight of your favors.”

If Bon does this rant to her pati babu, I think she will get all her fears out of her system and Ani will get a picture of what's going on in her head.

Chappals are allowed.

No chappals dear only 🤗🤗🤗and i wanna add along vth ths when emotional hugs allowed, wen she can discuss abt her menses issues, wen he can hold her hand, and in molestatn track he support her by sitting near her and sing loori all ths care only as responsibility... thn u can send quili didi to care me in all these touf times na .... 

Originally posted by: pratyay

“Enough Pati babu. You want me to understand my self-worth and not to come after you after multiple rejections. But can’t you see the relation you are claiming as null and void is the basis of the place I carved for myself in this house. You want me to understand my rights as a woman in society, but by removing your name from mine, what rights I will have over this house and family that I have come to love as mine. If I am not your wife, can I treat your kaka as my kaka sasur ji? Can I call Som dada as dada and tease Batuk as his boudi? With what rights I will perform durga maa’s aarti or make arrangements for any puja or event in the house? Can I sit as a family member rwhile dining? By not being your wife, I will lose the right to be the bahu,boudi and choti malkin of this house.

Leave everything aside. How can I stay in your room or sleep in your bed? How can I enter your study without permission or demand roshgulle from you? Do you think I can share my confusions with you or bombard you with questions with the same ease if I get to know I am nothing but a zimmedari you brought home? Till date, I thought as your wife I have the right to be in your room, come to you at any point of time and demand anything from you. I am so proud to have a husband like you. Now, if you claim me as a zimmedari, all that you have done for me will be deemed as a favor. Don’t you think it will hurt my self-respect that my previous year was nothing but favors bestowed upon me by you?

 

You might say nothing changes, Bondita. Of course it doesn’t for you, because from the day this marriage happened, it was clear that whatever you do, it will be out of responsibility. But I was oblivious to the truth of our marriage. I thought everything you did was out of concern and love for me, which I thought is my right to have as your wife.

If this is indeed the truth, why didn’t you stop kaka sasurji when he gave me the jewelry that belongs to the eldest bahu of this house? Why did you let me sit beside you and perform puja as your wife? Why did you let me stay in your room? You could put me in servant quarters as well. It doesn’t violate your promise to take responsibility for me and the truth, when revealed would have hurt me less and my self-respect wouldn’t have taken a big blow. Why did you say Bondita is my patni multiple times in front of everyone without being specific as sirf zimmedari wali patni? You knew the definition that was ingrained into me about marriage and husband then why didn’t you clear it out the first time you called me as your wife or I called you pati babu. You want me to stand up for myself, for my self-respect, but its tattered into pieces under the weight of your favors.”

If Bon does this rant to her pati babu, I think she will get all her fears out of her system and Ani will get a picture of what's going on in her head.

Chappals are allowed.

Beautifully written Niharika! I wish show Bon says something like this to Ani... Aadhi problem solve hogi...

Originally posted by: Ashley_m

Beautifully written Niharika! I wish show Bon says something like this to Ani... Aadhi problem solve hogi...

Thank you! They are failing so spectacularly at conveying their thoughts to each other.I am not sure its makers fault or their character flaws but I would have made my husband sit and tell him clearly what is going on if we are unable to make each other understand the other's perspective for days.

Originally posted by: rajiraji14

No chappals dear only 🤗🤗🤗and i wanna add along vth ths when emotional hugs allowed, wen she can discuss abt her menses issues, wen he can hold her hand, and in molestatn track he support her by sitting near her and sing loori all ths care only as responsibility... thn u can send quili didi to care me in all these touf times na .... 

Thank you! Serious miscommunication hai bhai from both sides.

Originally posted by: pratyay

Thank you! They are failing so spectacularly at conveying their thoughts to each other.I am not sure its makers fault or their character flaws but I would have made my husband sit and tell him clearly what is going on if we are unable to make each other understand the other's perspective for days.

So true, especially because lack of affection is clearly not the problem.

Originally posted by: pratyay

Thank you! Serious miscommunication hai bhai from both sides.

Its beghan yaar raji... yup bt tdy Bon said wat she need bt ARC refused.... so she vl do wat she want... ARC vl do wat he wants

Now that would be lovely.. Will solve half their issues for sure. But will the writers actually turn Bondita into a mature teenager, one we've seen streaks of, or will they rather make ker seem like a puppy-eyed love struck kushal gruhini? I think the choice is very obvious by now. 

But I like the idea of this happening. That would justify the reason why most of us started watching the show. 

Thanks. I loved what you wrote there.