Hi everyone,
This is my second attempt at writing on our Samaina. It's a short one.
I tried my level best. Honest criticism is most welcome but have little bit mercy on me while doing it.
Hope you guys will like it. If you don't like it then also for my satisfaction give honest feedback. I will try to rectify my mistakes next time.
I Need You To Survive!
Sun was setting and darkness was taking over the surrounding just like my heart.
My heart was bleeding just by the mere memory of Naina and Kartik's hug. That memory was carved in my heart and brain couldn't even erase it.
I know Naina is not at fault but what to do with this jealousy? No it's not jealousy because I trust her it's my possessiveness for her that I couldn't see anyone touching her because I care for her and respect her.I still haven't cross that limit yet because of that respect then how can anyone do that?
I know I am being unreasonable here maybe that was a part of script but I couldn't help I was getting more angry and my heart couldn't take it.
Was my Mom right about Naina? That she is practical who thinks by brain and I am an emotional fool who always think by heart.
I don't know but I couldn't see her with somebody else though It is just for acting.
Naina was trying to talk to me and I was avoiding her because of my anger and Mom's words were clouding my heart as well as my brain. I still didn't tell Naina that Mom rejected her for me not because of her looks or caste but she found her more superior than me.
Isn't it true? I know that Naina is far more superior than me she was school topper and in college also she tops even she is GS of our college. She is way better than me in every sense be it academic or any other things.
Isn't it ironic? That Nanu chose her for me for the same reasons that she will complete the things which I lack and my Mom rejected her for the very same reasons that she will be ahead of me and I will not be able to handle it.
I am fed up with this battle of my heart and brain because of my Mom and I told her that I have distanced myself from Naina and she was so happy that I listened to her.
She told me to focus on my studies.
But was it true? Can I live without Naina? The honest answer is NEVER but Yes I will! I will never come between her and her success, her responsibilities. I always want to see her succeed in life and achieve her dreams. If I am not in those dreams then also it's fine. I will let her go.
Exams were nearing and I was not at all interested in studies,my anger, hurt was overpowering everything.
All the students were studying in Library and I was in activity room playing a sad tune on my Guitar owing to my bad mood.
There she was at door came looking for me but I was not in mood to listen to her because of my resolve but she was hell bent on making me talk to her so she closed the door leaving no way for me to go.
She started to tell me whatever Kartik did he did it with the intention of causing a fight between us so he can win against us. I stood there my back facing her and then she started to question my love for her and I couldn't take it.
I told her that I love her the same like before but it's her who don't love me the same like before.
She was surprised at my accusation and I told her how I felt when she gave preference to everything before me be it her family her responsibility and her career so I have decided to go away from her. I know I was hurting her which I never even dreamed of doing it .
I started to go away from her but she blocked me and she was not ready to let me go.
She was telling me all those things which brought us closer to each other be it our first hand hold or bike ride and I was the first guy in her life with whom she did all those things and for me also it was the same.
She was crying pleading not to distance myself from her.
She told me that I am her life and her only need to survive. Isn't it same for me also?
My life starts and ends on her.
She was crying and then she did the unexpected she hugged me tightly. I was completely taken aback by it. She was crying and I couldn't take it any more and I wrapped my arms around her and felt she tightened her hold around me.
If you think that hug shocked me no but what she did next that's what left me spellbound!
She kissed me on the cheek.
She is the same girl who was not ready to give me kiss and she even punished me for crossing the limit when I tied that Dori of her dress. Can you imagine my shock when she herself broke all those barriers which are set by her family and she grew up with those just for me?
She was really scared to loose me when I told her that yes I will go away from her. It will be difficult but I will try.
Her delicate hands were in my hands and softly I kissed her hand. If I wanted I could've kissed her on cheek and she wouldn't have stopped me but for me her comfort matters a lot because I respect her a lot and I know to hug me and kiss me she showed that tremendous courage to broke those shackles which her family put on her in name of their false pride.
Finally she was in my arms and I felt so relieved from that hurt and anger I had because of Kartik as well as my Mom's words against Naina I just didn't want her to leave wish time just stops here it's only us in this moment. We were cherishing that moment of being in each other's arms feeling the warmth of our love in the cold weather of Ahmedabad.
But has anything happened smoothly with us? It's a big fat NO!
Those gits Kartik and Priyank were outside the room with Principal Ma'am and JBR waiting to catch us red handed.
Principal Ma'am saw me hugging a girl but she couldn't see the girl because Naina's back was facing the door. Thank God for small mercy! And I will not let anything happen to Naina. I told her to leave the room and go out by window but she was not ready to leave me and I promised her that I will take care of everything here.
Good when Ma'am, JBR and those Gits came inside Naina jumped out of the window and Ma'am couldn't see her face but she was so sure it was Naina inside the room with me. I told them that nobody was with me I was all alone playing guitar.
Ma'am told Kartik and Priyank to look outside in corridor to check if Naina is there or not.
I practically shouted hoping that they will not find Naina in corridor and Thank God Naina heard and flee from there and those gits came back to tell that they found none.
Ma'am was so furious she asked me to tell the name of that girl.
How can I do that? Forget about Naina but if any other girl would've been there I wouldn't have told her name. I know that for anyone it's a very humiliating situation be it a boy or girl but for girl it's all the more embarrassing than boy and I will never let that happen to any girl. Here my Naina's reputation was at stake and how can I let anyone question her character?
I told Ma'am if she thinks any girl was with me then it's my fault not that girl. She can punish me instead.
TBH the punishment she gave me I was not at all prepared for it. I thought she will call my Mama Mami or worst my Mom and Mr. Somani but she gave me the ultimatum to tell the name of girl or she will not allow me to give my final exams. Can you imagine my dilemma? I can't give Naina's name and I can't afford to skip exams because of the promise I made to Anand Chachaji as well as my Mom that I will never neglect my studies.
She gave me one form and time upto Morning to think of the consequences of my decision.
Naina called me in night and as expected she was worried for whatever happened in college. I decided to tease her little and to see her reaction of a situation so I started to tell her that I told her name to Principal Ma'am and now she wants to talk to my Mama Mami and her father. I knew her father was not in town so may be Chachaji has to come and that's it Naina got so worried she just started blabbering that now everyone will know about us and how Taiji and Tauji will beat her and throw her out of the house even Chachaji will be against us. That made me realise that yes we can't afford to loose our one and only support that is Chachaji because right now I don't have any hope from my Mom and to calm her down I told her that I was kidding. I was firm on my statement that there was no girl with me and Ma'am has to let me go without any proof.
Naina believed my lie thinking that's the truth but how long can I lie?
Because of this one lie I am gonna get tangle in web of lies which will be difficult to cut .
One day this truth will come out but I know my Naina will understand me for what I did and why I did it.
While talking to her I realised that my decision of signing that paper is correct because i can't let anything bad happen to her. In Morning I will convey my decision to Ma'am.
My Naina! My life starts and ends on her. I can do anything to keep her safe and happy.
I know my Mom will be so angry after knowing what I did for Naina.
For that If I have to go against my Mom then so be it. I will do that just for my Naina.
Yes Naina I can't live without you because You Are the most important Need of my life and I need you to survive!
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