Jalk, when I started the post for Sonakshi, I didn't really think it would become like a thesis. I am not someone who is good at penning down my thoughts in a concise manner. I started giving the explanations and kind of got carried away and forgot to add a couple more reasons. In my previous post, I gave the first three reasons for Sonakshi's behavior. First was her anger towards her own inabilities as "Sonakshi". Second was her anger towards Dev's inability to stand up to her father. Janaka announced that he will give Sita's hand in marriage to the guy who lifts the divine bow, a bow he was able to lift. In other words, a guy who is equal to him. And that is what Sonakshi tells him too. That her father is the best husband and he wasn't. And she became angry at Dev for not being able to stand up to the tests given by her father and convince him as to why he was right for her. The third reason was she being Bijoy's mouthpiece and was saying all the things that he wanted to say.
The fourth reason is what Elena tells Sonakshi after Dev leaves during Suhana's chickenpox track. Elena tells her, "Jab hi tu unko dekthi hai, tumhe sabkuch yaad ajata hai. Ki kya hosaktha tha aur kuch nahi ho paya. Tu unke saath hosakthi thi, Tu unke saath cheeze share karsakthi thi. tu unse naaraz nahi hai, tu khud se naaraz hai. ki tum kabi unse pyar hi nahi kar paayi". Humans have the greatest capacity for love. It is demons and machines who lack that ability. Bijoy is a narcissist who taught her that you can love a person for only what he can give to you -- conditional love. What Dev gave was unconditional love and gave it in abundance. She didn't feel like she deserved it, but here was Bijoy telling her that it is Dev who was undeserving of her. She slowly started realizing how selfish her father and her family actually were. If Dev became cynical towards "the world" after losing his father, she became cynical of "her world(Bose family)" after the farmhouse breakup. The more bitter she became, the more she lost touch with humanity and love. She started to believe that there was no such thing as love, that it is all a farce. Every one are just matlabi. No one does anything for anyone without a reason. And since Bijoy said I have raised you, given you good education, food, shelter clothing since childhood, this is the payment I want you to give me. And she became that "machine to repay her father's karz on her, which was being his "daughter.
The fifth reason was what Bijoy said to Dev paisonse tameez nahi karidi jaa sakthi. When they showed Sonakshi post leap, she was shown as a "rich woman. Yet none of her actions reflected any "richness in them. They were like that of an uneducated and uncouth woman. One more thing you need to notice is her entire get up. It was all show off. Her clothes, jewelry, purse everything was flashy and gaudy. It was all to show that she now had money, that she was a person of substance, worth. All these were to tell Dev and the Dixits that she was not a bechari anymore. She saw Dev's love as him showing pity on her because that is what Bijoy told her. And she wanted to show him that she no longer needed his pity. When they fight in Bose house following the theft incident, Asha asks her what happened to her. When Sonakshi says that she has always defended her family, Asha asks if this was how she did it. When Sonakshi says Dev crossed his limits, Asha says who happened to your limits. Then adds, is Dev a lafanga from the street, no, he was Suhana's father. And finally says "badtahmeezi ka jawab badtahmeezi se dene walon ko badtahmeez kaha jaata hai. This is something that Sonakshi had to badly hear. That all the while she was judging him, she had forgotten about her behavior. That before pointing fingers at him, she had to first look at herself. And here Asha takes the blame on herself saying "shayad meri parvarish main kuch kami rehagayi hai jo maine tumhe sahi raah nahi sikhaya. That is when Sonakshi accepts that she also made a mistake. But says saari galathi too meri nahin hosakthi na. For which Asha replies, for now I will accept that you are accepting that you were wrong too, that you were not right in what you have done. For now this is enough that you have started to think about right and wrong.
The way Bijoy projected everything was that they were morally superior family. They can never do anything wrong. And Dixits were the oppresses of the good. They were trying to pollute them with their wrongs, just like how demons disrupted the havans and other activities of saints in Ramayana. What Asha showed Sonakshi was that neither Dev nor Dixits were demons, nor the Boses were saints. That Dixits were a family just like them. That she had to first reflect on her family before judging some other family. She first had to judge herself, before judging others. That you cannot point fingers at someone without realizing that four of your own fingers are pointing at you, reminding you that you have to look at yourself first. And if you are judging someone else, judge them like how you would judge yourself. She had to realize that who she was and who Dev was, something that she had completely forgotten because of Bijoy. She had to start judging herself and her family members with the same moral compass that she used to judge the Dixits. Before questioning Ishwari, she had to admit to her father's biases. Before calling Dev as momma's boy, she had to admit that she was daddy's girl and if being daddy's girl was not wrong, then being momma's boy was not wrong either. When she listened to her father's every order and request, expecting Dev to reject his mother and her wishes was wrong. She had to admit to herself that they were not morally superior to Dixits and in fact they were on the same level as Tripatis.
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