Shaavi dear... This is for you - Page 132

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Shaavi thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago

Jalk, when I started the post for Sonakshi, I didn't really think it would become like a thesis. I am not someone who is good at penning down my thoughts in a concise manner. I started giving the explanations and kind of got carried away and forgot to add a couple more reasons. In my previous post, I gave the first three reasons for Sonakshi's behavior. First was her anger towards her own inabilities as "Sonakshi". Second was her anger towards Dev's inability to stand up to her father. Janaka announced that he will give Sita's hand in marriage to the guy who lifts the divine bow, a bow he was able to lift. In other words, a guy who is equal to him. And that is what Sonakshi tells him too. That her father is the best husband and he wasn't. And she became angry at Dev for not being able to stand up to the tests given by her father and convince him as to why he was right for her. The third reason was she being Bijoy's mouthpiece and was saying all the things that he wanted to say.


The fourth reason is what Elena tells Sonakshi after Dev leaves during Suhana's chickenpox track. Elena tells her, "Jab hi tu unko dekthi hai, tumhe sabkuch yaad ajata hai. Ki kya hosaktha tha aur kuch nahi ho paya. Tu unke saath hosakthi thi, Tu unke saath cheeze share karsakthi thi. tu unse naaraz nahi hai, tu khud se naaraz hai. ki tum kabi unse pyar hi nahi kar paayi". Humans have the greatest capacity for love. It is demons and machines who lack that ability. Bijoy is a narcissist who taught her that you can love a person for only what he can give to you -- conditional love. What Dev gave was unconditional love and gave it in abundance. She didn't feel like she deserved it, but here was Bijoy telling her that it is Dev who was undeserving of her. She slowly started realizing how selfish her father and her family actually were. If Dev became cynical towards "the world" after losing his father, she became cynical of "her world(Bose family)" after the farmhouse breakup. The more bitter she became, the more she lost touch with humanity and love. She started to believe that there was no such thing as love, that it is all a farce. Every one are just matlabi. No one does anything for anyone without a reason. And since Bijoy said I have raised you, given you good education, food, shelter clothing since childhood, this is the payment I want you to give me. And she became that "machine to repay her father's karz on her, which was being his "daughter.


The fifth reason was what Bijoy said to Dev paisonse tameez nahi karidi jaa sakthi. When they showed Sonakshi post leap, she was shown as a "rich woman. Yet none of her actions reflected any "richness in them. They were like that of an uneducated and uncouth woman. One more thing you need to notice is her entire get up. It was all show off. Her clothes, jewelry, purse everything was flashy and gaudy. It was all to show that she now had money, that she was a person of substance, worth. All these were to tell Dev and the Dixits that she was not a bechari anymore. She saw Dev's love as him showing pity on her because that is what Bijoy told her. And she wanted to show him that she no longer needed his pity. When they fight in Bose house following the theft incident, Asha asks her what happened to her. When Sonakshi says that she has always defended her family, Asha asks if this was how she did it. When Sonakshi says Dev crossed his limits, Asha says who happened to your limits. Then adds, is Dev a lafanga from the street, no, he was Suhana's father. And finally says "badtahmeezi ka jawab badtahmeezi se dene walon ko badtahmeez kaha jaata hai. This is something that Sonakshi had to badly hear. That all the while she was judging him, she had forgotten about her behavior. That before pointing fingers at him, she had to first look at herself. And here Asha takes the blame on herself saying "shayad meri parvarish main kuch kami rehagayi hai jo maine tumhe sahi raah nahi sikhaya. That is when Sonakshi accepts that she also made a mistake. But says saari galathi too meri nahin hosakthi na. For which Asha replies, for now I will accept that you are accepting that you were wrong too, that you were not right in what you have done. For now this is enough that you have started to think about right and wrong.


The way Bijoy projected everything was that they were morally superior family. They can never do anything wrong. And Dixits were the oppresses of the good. They were trying to pollute them with their wrongs, just like how demons disrupted the havans and other activities of saints in Ramayana. What Asha showed Sonakshi was that neither Dev nor Dixits were demons, nor the Boses were saints. That Dixits were a family just like them. That she had to first reflect on her family before judging some other family. She first had to judge herself, before judging others. That you cannot point fingers at someone without realizing that four of your own fingers are pointing at you, reminding you that you have to look at yourself first. And if you are judging someone else, judge them like how you would judge yourself. She had to realize that who she was and who Dev was, something that she had completely forgotten because of Bijoy. She had to start judging herself and her family members with the same moral compass that she used to judge the Dixits. Before questioning Ishwari, she had to admit to her father's biases. Before calling Dev as momma's boy, she had to admit that she was daddy's girl and if being daddy's girl was not wrong, then being momma's boy was not wrong either. When she listened to her father's every order and request, expecting Dev to reject his mother and her wishes was wrong. She had to admit to herself that they were not morally superior to Dixits and in fact they were on the same level as Tripatis.

Edited by Shaavi - 6 years ago
Uttara1112 thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
Well, I don't mind thesis at all, so that's fine, Shaavi. 
I liked your take on why SOna's dresses changed, esp the Katputli bit. Y'kno, I never gave any importance to the fact that Asha- Bijoy's clothes changed too through the series. I agree that WAS a nicely nuanced idea they brought in there, if it was intentional. 

Again, that SOna learned why DEv bore such guilt for everything only when she stepped into his shoes, sort of, post leap, is a very same point too. 

I think somewhere, like you said, SOna realized that Bijoy did not acept Dev at all, but I also feel she NEVER acknowledged it or never had the guts to actually admit it even to herself. That's why, she succumbed so easily to pressure and agreed to listen to his 'kasam' and refused to tell Dev she loved him at the Nisha engagement thing. 

Yes, perhaps, DEv did become a zombie until his emotions got to be too much for him to handle adn then he imploded bcos he was an extrovert but SOna instead, spewed venom at Dev and used him as her punching bag and thus blew off pressure. Maybe that's what she was doing post leap. 

"If Dev had the hangover of having too much alcohol, she had the hangover of too much of righteousness, pride in her upbringing and morality."- 
Loved this one. It is so true. She did not quite know where to apply it and where not to. 

And this "Just like how Dev couldn't see Ishwari's manipulations before, she couldn't see Bijoy's manipulations later. "_ exactly so. She could not see that Bijoy was not being fair, even when ASHA told her that just like Dev knew that Ishwari was wrong and Neha also hinted but he cud still not bring himself to admit it, preleap. 

I am very glad you think Bijoy hated Dev with a passion bcos I did portray it that way in the story:)) in later chapters, tho. 

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Posted: 6 years ago
Ishwari TOLD him that in his happiness, lay her happiness but that extended only until she wielded some measure of  control over what he actually did in terms of personal relationships. However, that was bcos of her immaturity not villainy. She DID correct herself later when she realized that she had hurt her own son- that was never her intention tho her actions were in total contrast with her deepest intent. She hurt him the most with that pre-nup and the fact that even then she did not change is something I cannot forgive at all. 
It is ironic, isn't it that the whole prenup was trying to show Dev as a cynic but he was the one who trusted blindly, loved blindly and gave blindly. That is, I guess, what they were trying to highlight- that what one appears to be on the surface may be totally opposite to what one actually is. They did bring that out in the first 50 or epis rather well too. 
 
And the point abt SOna judging Dixits yet never looking at her own family thru teh same lenses- oh so true. It was like there was a diff rule book for teh Boses and a diff one for the rest of the world. Well, the world is going to throw your rule book in your face and have a god laugh, to add to it. 
Shaavi thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago

Originally posted by: JALK2000

Well, I don't mind thesis at all, so that's fine, Shaavi. 

I liked your take on why SOna's dresses changed, esp the Katputli bit. Y'kno, I never gave any importance to the fact that Asha- Bijoy's clothes changed too through the series. I agree that WAS a nicely nuanced idea they brought in there, if it was intentional. 

Again, that SOna learned why DEv bore such guilt for everything only when she stepped into his shoes, sort of, post leap, is a very same point too. 

I think somewhere, like you said, SOna realized that Bijoy did not acept Dev at all, but I also feel she NEVER acknowledged it or never had the guts to actually admit it even to herself. That's why, she succumbed so easily to pressure and agreed to listen to his 'kasam' and refused to tell Dev she loved him at the Nisha engagement thing. 

Yes, perhaps, DEv did become a zombie until his emotions got to be too much for him to handle adn then he imploded bcos he was an extrovert but SOna instead, spewed venom at Dev and used him as her punching bag and thus blew off pressure. Maybe that's what she was doing post leap. 

"If Dev had the hangover of having too much alcohol, she had the hangover of too much of righteousness, pride in her upbringing and morality."- 
Loved this one. It is so true. She did not quite know where to apply it and where not to. 

And this "Just like how Dev couldn't see Ishwari's manipulations before, she couldn't see Bijoy's manipulations later. "_ exactly so. She could not see that Bijoy was not being fair, even when ASHA told her that just like Dev knew that Ishwari was wrong and Neha also hinted but he cud still not bring himself to admit it, preleap. 

I am very glad you think Bijoy hated Dev with a passion bcos I did portray it that way in the story:)) in later chapters, tho. 


@bold blue. The makers did use costume as a story point. If you see Dev's clothes, it is very clear. Post leap, most of the time his clothes are torn, kind of ill suited for a billionaire businessman. In the beginning of the series, she tells him that he is a paisewale gareeb, who cannot afford her. And when she left him in the farmhouse, that is what he felt of himself. As a poor guy lacking the skills and demands to be a good husband for Sonakshi. Also his life didn't really have any meaning and had lots of holes in it along with disorganization. His clothes illustrated those feelings of his. As the story progressed and the tug of war became more and more, we see Dev wearing flimsy tee shirts with kind of shrugs/jackets and unkempt hair and beard. It was like he was being vulnerable in the face of what Ishwari was asking him to do, the knowing of Ishwari's guilt and himself feeling guilty about it, his feeling of helplessness due to not being able to find that family was brought out nicely with the clothes he was shown wearing. If he was wearing a suit, had that clean shaven and nice short haircut look, like how he was shown in the beginning of the series, then probably his helplessness would have not been that convincing. His sadness was very telling because of the clothes he was shown in.

@ red, completely true. She didn't want to admit that she and more than herself, her father being at fault in the breaking of her relationship with Dev. Admitting that Bijoy didn't like or accept Dev was admitting that her father didn't accept her "happiness" which meant she had to admit her father as a regular human, just like everyone else. She had to admit to her lack of true understandings and rethink everything. Denial was an easy way out. This way she didn't have to accept her cowardice(lack of courage to tell Bijoy he was wrong and that she loved Dev), or that she did wrong in leaving Dev or for that matter it was she who left Dev and not him. Taking the responsibility of negative consequences is not easy. Especially when you have to keep the image of being "right" in front of a moral judge(Bijoy). ðŸ˜†

@green. What you said is exactly what she was doing. She was spewing the anger of all her broken dreams and hopes of her life on him. For her it was like Dev had somehow cheated her by portraying himself as this prince, as a person who could do anything. She had seen him do the impossible when he got that cake for Asha's birthday or when he saved her life when she had the accident. So from her pov, she expected him to be that all the time. A person capable of anything. And more than that her heart created this whole fairy tale story for herself. She saw herself as a princess trapped in the tallest tower, Dev as the prince who should have rescued him from the dragon(Bijoy) which protected that tower. She became angry with Dev as he couldn't WIN against her father. It was like you can go from rags to riches, but you can't even do this. Of showing my father all the good you can do. What is the use of saving me from that accident, when you couldn't save the death of my dreams, hopes and desires. I know I am weak, but you were supposed to be the strong one. Why weren't you strong. Why were you not able to slay the dragon. Added to that was Bijoy's venom that he had filled her head with. Result was her behavior. ðŸ˜ƒ

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Posted: 6 years ago
Hello Guys,
This topic has already crossed 150 pg. Make a new thread to continue.

Thanks
KRPKAB DT