[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwmsxKJpCw4[/YOUTUBE]
"Raman no..." she groaned as he caressed her smooth creamy back and placed soft gentle kisses. He bit her earlobe as she requested him to stop.
"Ishita..." he asked her to stay back in his deep husky voice.
He turned her around. They shared a deep passionate eye lock. Tears fell down her face knowing he was going to leave soon, while his eyes were becoming moist as well. He leaned over and kissed her forehead.
"I don't want to see these lines of worry on your forehead."
She brought his face closer to her and placed a small peck on his forehead.
"I don't want any on your forehead either."
He brought his thumb up to her eyes and wiped off her tears and he followed with a soft kiss on her closed eyes.
"I never want to see tears fall from your eyes; they are too precious to be wasted."
"First you stop, your tears make me want to cry."
She repeated his actions and kissed his eyes gently letting her lips linger on his face for a few extra second trying to increase the time they had left together. He smiled at her with his eyes sparkling and his dimples slowly appearing.
She placed a soft feather like kiss on his cheek.
"I want to see your dimples appear as you smile all the time."
He leaned to kiss her cheek, but then backed off.
"You don't have dimples, but I still want to see a smile on your lips always."
They came closer and locked their lips together trying to hold on to each other as long as they could, savouring this moment they had before they were separated forever. As they parted away, they both looked at each other for one last time.
Her eyes begged him not to go while his eyes showed helplessness and he started to walk away. She saw him walking backwards taking small steps. She wanted to run towards him, but something stopped her. He smiled as he turned away and started to walk off. She wanted to scream, but no words came out of her mouth. All she could do was watch him go; just watch her life slipping out of her hands.
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Continued below...
He went out of sight and she stood still in the same spot. She stood there watching his shadow and as it started to disappear, she heard a loud noise ringing at the back of her head. She got up with a jerk and realized it was just a dream; he was just a dream.
"Every year on this day, I have this dream of you. And every year I wonder what it would be like if you were with me..."
She ran her fingers over the picture of his that stood on her nightstand. She kissed the photo and placed back into its spot.
"Good morning Raman." She said and got up with a smile.
She walked over to her closet and looked through her sarees. Most days she didn't care much about looking nice, since she wouldn't be able to hear his indirect compliments. But today was special; it was his birthday. She wanted to look as nice as she possibly could. She reached out for her brank new pink saree, but for some reason her hand went in a different direction and she picked out her pale blue saree that had a thin silver border. Blue; it always reminded her of him, It was his favourite colour, and anytime he wanted to gift her something, it was either in blue or green; her favourite color or some combination of the two.
"Blue it is then..." she smiled imagining as if Raman himself had picked this out for her. She placed it close to herself as if she was feeling him as she hugged the saree.
"Ishita are you awake?! Hurry up and get ready!"
She heard her mother-in-law call her bringing her back into reality. She shook her head and chuckled to herself.
"Ravan Kumar, he still has that effect on me. Always distracts me from everything."
She came out all dressed and stood in in front of the vanity drying her hair with her towel. She remembered how he told her he loved to wake up to this wonderful sight and then he would start torturing her right in the morning by placing soft kisses on her back and neck. As much as she loved it, she would feel shy and want to get away. As she felt the wind blow of her back, it sent shivers down her spine and it reminded her of his touch.
"Raman..." She closed her eyes and whispered as she should when he wouldn't let her go in the mornings.
She opened her eyes as tears burned the corner of her eyes. In those days she would want to get away from his sweet tortures, but today she would give up anything just to have him here, just to have him touch her, to have him love her, and to just be with her.
She reached over to his watch that lay on her vanity. The watch had been stopped at the moment her life changed completely. She kept the watch as a reminder of the time she hated the most in her life. She put it back into its place.
She looked over at his favourite cologne that she had gifted him on his last birthday with her. The bottle was almost empty with a few drops left, but she kept it so she could open it up and smell whatever bit of his fragrance was left. And that's exactly what she did right now, she opened the bottle and inhaled his scent and it felt as if he was right next to her that very moment.
As she put the bottle back, she looked at his things that had been placed all over her room so she could see them every day, right from his handkerchief, his clothes, and his pictures to his notepad, his laptop, and wallet. Everyone told her to throw all this things out since they was no point in keeping the things of someone who left her, but she didn't pay heed to anyone and cherished everything that had his presence in it.
She got up and headed out to prepare for his birthday celebrations, which she did every year no matter what anyone thought. But she also tried to mentally prepare herself since today was the day that every little thing would represent him to her.
She headed to the kitchen to prepare everything for the party they were holding in the afternoon. As she cooked, she only kept him and his preferences in mind as she decided the menu. All his favourite foods were cooked and there were 2 desserts made by her mother-in-law since today was her cheat day from her "dieting". Everyone in house from her to Mummyji to Simmi pitched in to cook, but there was one thing she wouldn't let anyone help her with; and that was his cake.
She made it herself every year and would decorate it differently each year, but one thing remained the same; the "Happy Birthday My Raman." Just so she could ice those words onto the cake, she wouldn't let anyone come near it until it was ready to be cut.
All that she could think about as she made the cake was him. Physical he was so far from her, so she couldn't hold his hand as he cut the cake she would make, she couldn't have him feed her and she couldn't feed him, she couldn't hand over the gift she would have for him, she just couldn't be with him. It broke her not being able to have him with them as they celebrated his birthday, but nonetheless she considered it her duty and more than that she herself liked doing this. The whole family would come together and everyone would enjoy themselves. But more than anything she did all this because if he was with her, he would have been so excited right now. He always believed each moment of life was worth celebrating and the day you got this life should be celebrated in the grandest way possible. And by throwing a party on his birthday, she felt like she made him happy, but she would never know if she really did since he was so far away...
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