riya Gupta (BOMBAY TIMES; September 3, 2014)Mary Kom, 32, is a fighter all the way. She is strong but emotional, feisty but demure, has a boxer's body but is equally as fashionable as Priyanka Chopra. This five times world champion did the impossible when she made her first comeback after having her twins and winning the bronze at the Olympics and now, she has once again done that having been just selected for the upcoming Asian Games, post her third child. I met her along with her husband Onler Karong Kom just before they were headed to Patiala for the selections for the Asian Games and she was unable to hide her anxiety and desire to play for her country once again. She had stayed several months without her children, building her body and preparing for this. Over an hour-long conversation with her and her husband Onler exclusively to the Bombay Times, she speaks about her feelings after seeing the biopic Mary Kom made on her, her protector and best friend Onler and her dream of winning a gold at the Olympics. Excerpts:
There are very few sportspeople on whom a film has been made and you are one of them. How did you feel seeing the film?
Seeing the film, I was reminded of all the difficulty and struggle I went through and all the hard times. Everyone was watching the film, but Omung Kumar sir was sometimes watching me to see my reaction. Two times I cried. Once, when I was felicitated in my village on becoming the World Champion and the second, when I had to leave my kids in the hospital when they were just four to go and play in China.
Onler, did you cry also?
I could make out that Mary was crying, but I did not cry. I have a strong heart. It really touched me, but still I controlled myself. I did not want people around me to see me crying, so I was controlling. I am emotional inside, but cannot show. Even when I am angry, I don't show it. I don't normally get angry easily, but once I am hot, it's finished.
Mary, tell us about your childhood?
My parents always wanted me educated, but I was only interested in sports.I would be the only girl playing with the boys on the field. No other girl played football or any other game.They would kick me out and say , 'Don't come. You are a girl. Go and do some housework.' But I would always be trying to request them to allow me to join them. Some senior boys would allow me, so I got to play. While my father would not say anything, my mother would often fire me to come and do other housework. But I would always help both my parents in whatever work they did. I somehow managed to finish my B.A. but always wanted to be a top sportsperson.
Mary, how did you meet Onler?
I got into boxing when I was 17 and got married to him when I was 25. At that time, he was 32. I am more emotional. He may be emotional inside, but I don't get to see his emotions on his face. I cry easily. I was in Delhi in a camp at the Nehru Stadium hostel and had been selected for the World Championship. Onler was living with his cousin and was preparing to give the exams for the Civil Services and was the student Union President of his community. He got to know through the newspaper that one of the persons from the Kom community had got selected for the world championship and he came to meet me.
Onler, why would you go and meet a stranger?
She was the only one from our community. Being the student union president of my community, I thought it is was my duty to go and see if she was comfortable and if she needed anything. Kom is a small tribe. I would bring her home food as she was in a hostel. She, along with her friend from Mizoram, would come to my cousin's place every Sunday to eat meat with us. I met her in 2001 and then in 2003, I was just thinking that if I get married to her, she will be more comfortable and I can openly help her. As a friend, people would look at us and think in a very different manner. I knew that she needed someone to look after her career and her finances and most importantly, look after her. She had so many disturbances financially, morally and risk from other boys in the profession, who would disturb her. Some people wanted to disturb her career and I thought that if she agrees, we could get married. I said, 'Mary, will you agree if I ask your hand in marriage? It is very simple. If you agree, you can reply to me after one or two months on my proposal.' From that day, she was just not normal and I could see that something was happening in her mind. She came home and decided to asked me, 'If I said yes, will you allow me to continue my games?' I said, 'That is the reason I am getting married to you.' We then started planning on how we would tell our parents and in 2004, we got married.
Onler, what do you like the most about Mary?
I like that she is very open, humble and down-to-earth. I proposed to her a even though we were not dating. I have this principle that I have to love my wife and I have to be loved by my wife because God has granted her as my wife and me as her husband. And we cannot take this very lightly. We both believe a lot in God. Mary reads the Bible all the time in her room, whenever she gets free time.
And Mary, what do you like the most about Onler?
I love him the most in the world, as he is always caring about me all the time. Caring is important for us, as women we are not very safe. I can save myself from one person attacking me, but can't save myself from two persons attacking me and the environment. Also, there is always politics in selection and somewhere at such times, you will have enemies as someone has to be selected and someone rejected. He has till date never said, 'I love you,' even though we have three children. On the music launch, Priyanka Chopra and Omung sir forced him, so that is the first time he said those words to me.
Mary, how safe is it for you to live in Manipur?
Onler lost his father in 2007 when he was shot by a gunman. There are areas where it is unsafe. We also don't know. Night is not safe. The UG (Underground as they are called) only want money. My house guard is there and I go everywhere with him. After becoming a world champion, I have a job at the police department in my state. Right now, they are fully supporting my sport but later, after retiring from sports, I will work in that job.
As a mother, do you feel scared of getting hurt when you fight?
No. I never get scared of getting hurt and keep getting bruises on my head, lips and forehead.
You are already the World Champion 5 times. What more?
I want to be a sportsperson all my life, not to earn more money or fame, but still want to play and enjoy that. The main goal is to fight in the next Olympics. In the last Olympic games, I have not completely fulfilled my dream as I won a bronze. I want to win a gold.
Mary, what was the lowest point in your life?
When I could not give my family all the time. When my twins were just one year old, I left them, to go to camp to train for several months. I could not afford an air ticket to come back to Manipur to see them even once. I would be missing them all the time so needed to be strong and concentrate on my practice. But I needed to take up the challenge of being able to get back despite being a mother.
One of Bollywood's leading ladies Priyanka Chopra is portraying you on screen. How does that feel?
She is the right person to play me as she has a strong body structure so when I thought who could play me, I felt she was the only one. She is very friendly, open, simple and is very nice. I like her very much and thank her for taking this role. As a child, I watched so many movies and could never have dreamt that one day a film would be made on me. I liked Amitabh Bachchan's sir boxing in Sholay film.
Onler, do you have a favourite actress?
I always liked Rekha.
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