kitna pakela monday hain...issko aur pakane main aa gayi😆
here here...its here
(danger alert so @red😆 )
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Story starts after thakur invited samjun in ramgarh. Fast forward ur mind )
Samjun came in a Marcedez bench SUV 😲….but not sitting in it,
pushing it to Ramgarh.
Sam – " arre yaar, gadi to chura li, petrol bhi chura lena
chahiye tha…. Dekh kya entry mari hain humne…'' 😆 (duffer kahinka 😆)
Arj- "hmm.. … isse acha to cycle chura lete. "
They saw a big water tank in the middle of Ramgarh.(remeber the suicide scene wala water tank? its the very same , with modification.😉 )
Sam- " wah, Ramgarh
ka main tourist attraction ! "😃
A old man was passing
by, and answered them , ''dimag kharab ho gaya hain kya? Yahan kaun sa tourist
ayega? Tum log kuch karnaama karo to shayad mujhe ek biwi mil jaye….uss
kamine chotu gabbar ke wajeh se mujhe
dulhan nahi mil rahi…''😡
Samjun scanned the man, 60- 70+ age , from top to bottom, ''apko
to iss umar mein ladki milne se rahi…..buddhi jaroor mil sakti hain. '' and
they hi5 each other. 🤣
The budhha shouted, ''aee….budha kisko bola re? budhha hoga
tera baap !''😡
Sam – ''ae baap pe mat ja….ata maaji satakli !''
Arjun calming them down ,'' arre, kyu thak rahe ho ?'' they
both stopped fighting. the old man answered, ''yeh water tank nahi, petrol tank
hain.''
Samjun looked at him with disbelieve, ''kya?''😲😲
''arre itna chaukne ki kya baat hain? Tum log chor hoke
gaari chura sakte ho, to who daku hoke petrol tank nahi chura sakta?''👏 (clap for me for writing this dialogue 🤣)
Arj- to apne adde mein kyu nahi rakha isse Gabbar ne?
Old man, '' arre iss bahane se to yahan pe ata hain, aur
humein loot leta hain.'' And the man left.
Samjun entered thakur's house, pushing the SUV of course.
Thakur was waiting for them, with Ramu kaka and daughter Aisha 😉.they took
blessing of them.ramu kaka placed his hands on them.Samjun was puzzled😕.
''arre, who kya hain na, sahib ke haath nahi hain..to sare
kaam mujhe hi karne parte hain.''😭
Samjun looked at each other, Sam took out a bottle of hand
sanitizer, ''yeh apka birthday gift Thakur sahib, jiski I think
Ramu kaka ko zyada zaroorat hain….jab toilet se….🤢'' he trailed off and Thakur
looked embarrassed and kaka looked disgusted, and Aisha chuckled 🤣🤣. Sam was
shocked as she winked at him.
''meri ankhen to thik hain? Issne mujhe ankh maari?'' he
asked to Arjun.😲
''tera dimag to thik hain? Tharki kahin ka!'' Arjun scold
him.😡
They went to their room and called it for a day. Next day,
they took a Taanga to see Gabbar's adda.and of course, they met Taange waali Basanti.😳
Arjun – " humein gabbar ke thikane pe le ja sakti ho? "
Basanti was surprised, and started, ''tum log ka dimag to
thik hain? Kahin Ranchi se bhaag kar to nahi aye ho? Ya phir Guwahati se? suna
hain wahan pe bhi naya khula hain.''😉
Sam – " kya? "
Basanti- " pagalkhana
aur kya! "
Samjun – "kya? "
Basanti- " to aur kya?
Kahin dimag ghar pe to chor ke nahi aye ho? Mujhe batao, main abhi le kar ati
hoon. "😆
Arjun was pissed, ''oye suno….''😡
Basanti- " oye, Basanti
dada se jubaan sambhal ke baat kr, warna, samjhey ya samjhaoon? Yahin tera gala
chir doongi aur kisiko kanokan khabar nahi hogi.''😡😲
(oh my...maine Riya ko gundi bana diya😲🤣)
Sam- uri baba….Gundi Basanti !
Basanti – "yeah , this one, '' and flashed her dimple smile.👏
Arjun was frustrated,
''arre meri ma….''
Basanti- " oye maa hogi teri mausi! "😡
Arjun-" mausi ko
beech mein mat lao, samjhi ya samjhaoon? "
Basanti-" oye, mera
dialogue chura liya…chor kahinka! "😡
Sam whispered , ''arre isse kaise pata?''
Arjun was shouting now, ''tumne churaya hain mera
dialogue….chorni!''😡
Basanti- " kyu? Iss
pe tumhara copy right hain kya? Huh…baat karte hain…. "
Sam tried to control the situation, ''arre, shant ho jao tum
dono. Dekho Basanti…''
Basanti- " kaun basanti?"😲
Sam- " tum aur kaun?"😕
Basanti-" Riya naam hain mera."
Sam- " to Taange mein Basanti kyu likha hain? "
Riya- ''who to Sholay ka effect dene ke liye…..samjhey
ya…..'' she unfinished the dialogue and grinned at Arjun who was super pissed.😆
Sam- " ok, look riya, humein sirf gabbar ke adde ke kuch door pe chor do, humein bas area
dekhna hain."
Riya nodded and the trio left.
After coming back, Arjun went to washroom, and Sam lied on
the bed…it was a tiring day.suddenly he felt 2 soft hands were trying to
strangle him.
''what the….khoon khoon !'' he opened his eyes and saw Aisha
staring at him, croosing her arms on chest.😆
''arre kya hua kya hua?'' arjun came from washroom wearing boxer
only, and witnessed Aisha. He nodded and left for washroom again. (giving them space u see🤣)
''ttuuum…yyyahaaan…'' Sam stammered.
Aisha was irritated, ''kya yaar…socha hot ladke aye hain,
kuch karne ko milega…yahan to sab phattu nikla.''😉
Sam was angry now, Rowdy Rathore ko phattu !
''phattu kisko bola?''😡
''arre…phattu sher ban gaya.'' She said naughtily, and went
towards him. He was now stuck between bed and her, and fell onto bed.she fell
on him and seductively ran her finger on his face and neck.😉
''dddkho….tttummm aisa kkkuchh mat karo…. Main waisa ladka nahi hoon….'' He stammered.
Aisha
jumped and yelled, ''kya? Tum kaise….i mean waise….oh, issliye double package
mein aye ho….uff.'' (doouble package means Samjun ...samjhey ya...😆)
Sam jumped too, now standing, '' tum ye kya bakwas kar rahi
ho? Mera matlab waisa nahi tha.''
She looked at him half expectantly and asked, ''to tum G
*beep* *beep* nahi ho?''
Sam- " nahi…main G *beep*
*beep* nahi hoon."🤣 ( got it, G**)
Aisha sighed in relief. Sam asked, ''tum aise…I mean koi kya
sochega….''
Aisha- sochega ki tum
kitne bade kamine ho…akeli bechari ka fayda utha rahe ho.''😉
Sam was stunned and looked at her scaredly, she grinned and
said, ''don't worry…kisiko pata nahi chalega.'' She winked and left.
Sam slumped on the bed, ''kya ajeeb ladki thi…aur hot bhi
!''😳
After some days, Arjun was busy day dreaming…to be more
precise dreaming adult content about someone.
Sam- " kya soch raha hain? "
Arjun dreamily, ''Basanti….''
Sam— " arre wah, jhagre se direct SR?"😲
Arjun- " arre two shot hain, sab kuch fast forward. 😉 Tu jake
mausi se baat kar." (despo kahinka😳 )
Sam nodded and left for mausi house.
Mausi- " mujhe riya ne bataya arjun ke bare mein…ladka hain
kaisa?"
Sam , stammering, ''who to superman hain…akele 10 admiyon ko
maar sakta hain…ek haath se 100 kilo utha sakta hain….ek kick se 10 km dur pe
kisiko bhi fek sakta hain.''
Mausi-" beta, ladka issi planet ka hain ya phir krypton ka?"
(superman effect)🤣
Sam- "nahi mausi…ladka insaan hi hain…."
Mausi-" to who koi
commando hain?"😆
Sam, not controlling anymore, ''mujhse aur jhoot nahi bola
jata….woh chor hain.''😕
Mausi, ''main to abhi riya ki shaadi arjun se krwa doon…pr
kambakht script ! mujhe ab na karna hoga….warna story age kaise badegi? To mera
jawab hain….
Nahi….nahi….nahi…….'' (from 3 directions)🤢😭
Sam half hearted went to Arjun and informed that Mausi
rejected him. Heartbroken, he went up to the high petrol tank tower, to attempt
suicide. but it was noon and everyone was sleeping in their houses, so he took
a loud speaker and shouted through it.
''gaao walon…gaao walo…gaao walo.''
Sam observed this through a safe distance, and said to
himself, ''yeh 3 baar bolne ka kya factor hain? Kekta factor?''😆
Everyone came out from their house, irritated. A man was
managing his lungi, and shouted, ''kamine mera pura mood spoil kar diya ! kitne
dino ke baad biwi maani thi…..tera satyanash ho kalmuhe !''😡 🤣
Arjun yelled through loud speaker, ''mera satyanash to pehle
se hi ho chukka hain. Gaao walo, yeh jo Riya hain na…'' he pointed towards her,
''isse mera lagan hone wala tha….par iss buddhi Mausi….''😭
Mausi yelled, ''buddhi kisko bola re aeee????''😡
Arjun corrected himself, ''sorry…iss not so budhhi mausi ne
mana kar diya…so I am now commiting suicide….and tum log ab jail mein chakki
pissing and pissing.'' He showed jalebi bai moves.👏
From nowhere , a song played, " tauba tera jalwa, tauba tera pyaar / Tera
emotional atyachar"🤣
Arjun yelled, ''arre..iss serious situation mein kiska gana
baj raha hain? Band karo isse.''😡
It was a ring tone from a man, he said, ''sorry yaar…GF ka
phone hain.''
Arjun – "saale meri nahi pat rahi hain..tujhe khud ki pari
hain? Meri haai lagegi tujhe."😡😭
The man sweared, ''teri maa ka saakinaka !''
Sam controlled it, ''arre, chup ho jao yaar…ladke ka dimag
think nahi hain..suicide karne wala hain yeh.''
A man from gaao walo, ''arre acha hi hoga agar jail chale
jaye to…Gabbar se chhutkara to milega.!''😆
Arjun- "arre…yeh script mein nahi likha hain ! khud dialogue
mat maar!"😲
Now entered Shree….as Rahim chacha.😲😲😲
''itna sannata kyu hain bhai?'' he yelled on top of his
voice.someone said, ''arre kaka, ankhon ke saath kaan bhi kharab hogaya kya?
Itna sab chal raha hain sun nahi rahe ho?''🤣
Basanti / Riya came and hand him over the ear piece. He is
blind and deaf too.Rahim chacha (shree ) took it and left.
Sam was confused, ''itne short time ke liye aya ye? Special
appearance?''😲 🤣
Arjun, ''arre salo…yahan ek admi marne wala hain…isse to
thoda footage do!🤣 Main kud raha hoon….'' He was about to jump then someone
said, ''arre aise maroge nahi…isski height itni nahi hain. Ek kaam karo, petrol
tank mein ghus jao, main yaha se lighter fek ta hoon.''🤣
Arjun was hell pissed, ''kaminey…😡tujhe bada interest hain
mere suicide mein? 😡Chal, nahi maroonga main? Kya kar lega tu?''😡
Someone from gaao walo, ''arre koi nahi mar raha hain…chalo
sab ghar jao.''
Arjun, ''arre….marega na….barabar marega!''😆
Mausi, ''arre chodo…mujhe yeh rishta manjoor hain. Ab khush
! main chalti hoon…mujhe neend aa rahi hain…'' and she left.🥱
Arjun was happy. He threw away the loud speaker, and danced,
Dil jumping jhapak jhampak jhampak
Thumping thapak thampak thampak
Gili gili ae! 🤣🤣🤣
''gaaon walo…'' now the time of official announcement,
''marna cancel.'' 😆
The gaao walo sweared under their breath and left, cursing
him.
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kaisa laga? nxt part will also come...and of course Chotu as Gabbar😆
stay tuned😉
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