Originally posted by: a little faith
So the title threw me off a bit. I mean I understand the significance, those aftershocks of love that still remain even though our beloved does not, igniting feelings that are decreed no life beyond fizzling out. (Need to interrupt you there to say WOW! ) I meant in relation to your previous titles. I tried to follow the flow of the previous and find some kind of meaning, and being dim witted this is all the meaning I could muster.
Dimwitted who? π² Honestly, Sabah, I can't think of a more jarringly inappropriate adjective for you! π² I must confess I didn't intend for a flow in the titles really, but merely wrote the first thing that came to my mind as I put myself in the protagonist's situation. I intend for the story to be more of a stream of consciousness type thing, which is kind of lazy π and also, I hope, realistic. Realistic, I think, because in life, there's always that odd something that is too random to fit into the general scheme, flow of things, that shakes you out of your previous conceptions.
From the safety of ashore to those strong winds that remind you that no where is safe we find ourselves finding warmth in even the most barren, forsaken of resources, so that even if we don't get those fireworks we long yearned for, we can appreciate the glow of something that smoulders.
Absolutely love your interpretation! So much so, that I am extremely tempted to pretend that was my intention all along.. but I can't because I already gave myself away above π But your take on things is so beautifully profound! βοΈ
Also it reminded me of Bruce Lee's quote, Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. So, in a manner, she has traversed all these points, that friendship slowly but surely ignited and now is burning itself out BUT with an intensity that can still scorch hearts. Sorry, I may have walked off the map on this one.
No, I don't think you walked off the map at all. The fire that has now been reduced to embers could refer to several things. The love, most certainly yes. And also her anger, her resolutions.
She wants the fire of extreme emotions (positive or negative, love or hate, happiness or anger); she wants the certainty, the drive that their extreme hotness seem to give her. But instead, there's this weird in-betweenness of neither hot nor cold - the ashes, the embers. Bland melancholy...
I liked the composition of the first lines, that statement of surety with a complimentary exemption. Nicely done.
bland melancholy and unfelt smilesExcellently penned description of numb. Many writers use the line 'I felt numb or nothing' but you eschew the hackneyed common place for something personal and create as you say a strange beauty. Beautifully done.
It had been so easy for me to be reduced to a person who merely hung around the gang that he hardly ever talked to anymore. OK, so this I did not really understand, and since I sometimes or rather most of the times miss the point, I would be obliged for an explanation. I mean why had he reduced her or demoted her to something less. I mean I as far as I am assuming, he did not have an idea of her feelings for him. Is it that upon some level he understood her feelings for him and so to avoid hurting her and his girlfriend's feelings, decided to set up a perimeter of safety from awkwardness? I mean hadn't he always considered her a friend at the very least? So why the sudden change in manner from his side?
Oh, I completely understand your confusion! You didn't miss the point actually. I just haven't made it, yet. The story is partly true, and this part in particular, is almost entirely based on true events. Weird, inexplicable stuff does happen. Or maybe it wouldn't be so weird and inexplicable, if we knew both sides of the story, but then, how often does it really happen that others allow us into their inner worlds / that we stop our ego from creating a barrier between us and others? If it is any consolation, your confusion is shared by the protagonist at this point of her journey. Hopefully she would be able to dispel some of it in later parts, but I guess, until then, the clouds of uncertainty and disbelief would have to prevail.
I'm really sorry for being so deliberately cryptic. I'd be so, so annoyed if I were you!π π
I smiled again. Wonderfully penned, I love how you bring it back to this theme of unfelt smiles. You eloquently state your point, that no feelings of anger arose in her, but in a very subtle, discreet and dignified manner, as is the protagonist's style. Excellent. I really love, the contrast of my lips had learnt to curve against the truth for truth is normally perceived to upon the straight line, so in this way her curve is like a rebellion against that unbent line. Finely done!
Again, the phrasing of too close to attraction wonderful, using those nuances of closeness and nearness within attraction and playing them off the word itself. Genius!
Huuuge compliments, coming from you. Humbled, but also extremely thrilled π³
So I hated the in-betweenness that I was stuck in Ah! Redemption and penance of the protagonist. She suffers for the having placed her heart in such a precarious position in the first place, but it is saved from ruin, from becoming hard and bitter by just hating its present location, not making it personal. However as they say love will find a way and to her beguile this is exactly what it does, I was trying to orchestrate everything into a self-flattering fairytale again. It is a lose lose situation, wonderfully composed by you, if she hates him then she loses her heart to bitterness AND if she doesn't hate him she loses her heart to delusions, distractions and in the end unfelt smiles.
Exactly! π
I loved the repeat of horrible, in that way she is almost trying to convince herself, affirm a statement. However as they say, the lady does protest too much!
Haha! She is a bit of a drama queen, isn't she? π
"Oh no no no, I'm done." I loved, just loved the manner you segued from the actual into the literal here. Skillfully done!
lingering Ah, that pit stop of the heartbroken AS WELL AS a excellent cliffhanger. It reminds me of one of my favourite songs by cranberries...if you, if you could return, don't let it burn, don't let it fade. Good chapter, well composed and keeping the reader very much engaged. WIth much love Sabah
[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PhOfJhJKZk[/YOUTUBE]
Absolutely adore that song!! βοΈ βοΈ βοΈThanks for sharing!
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