Here you go
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It was late in the night and Gopi had been in bed for quite a long time but was still tossing and turning. Something was bothering her but she couldn't understand what it was because it had been a relatively good day. It had started out so well, even though she had defied Maaji's orders, she had spent the night in the mandir with devi mata. Tonight, after a long time, she had gotten a really good look at Ahamji; he looked so good in his chocolate brown Sherwani. Gopi thought to herself, "Tonight I was able to participate in the aarti and that too with Ahamji. Then I played Dandiya with Ahamji, which was so nice. I wish it was real, that Ahamji had wanted to play dandiya with me and wanted to be around me. While we were playing dandiya, just for a few minutes, I didn't feel so alone. Enough Gopi! Snap out of it and just go to sleep."
But sleep eluded Gopi, she decided to go check on the eternal lamp in the mandir. As she tried to tiptoe quietly in the dark hallway, she saw a light from under Ahamji's guest room door. She slowed down to see if he fell asleep with the light on but noticed that Aham was still working on his laptop. He works so hard, Gopi thought to herself. She walked away and went down to the mandir where she added more ghee to the eternal lamp and sat down for a few minutes to think and clear her head. As she sat down thoughts about the last few days swirled around in her head randomly. The chor! Teej festival! Rashiben! Ahamji thinking she was a thief again - that really hurt! Kinjalben! The electrical bill! Spa! Kinjalben! The boy in the hallway!
What should I do about Kinjalbed? Gopi thought. I know she is not happy, she hasn't been ever since the Mehta rishta came for her; and then she disappeared from the spa and now the boy in the hallway. If I tell maaji she is going to be really upset, first that I didn't tell her right away and then hurt that Kinjalben didn't tell her. What should I do, devi ma? Gopi took out the meditation beads and decided to meditate for a while, meditating always helped her relax and think clearly.
Meanwhile Aham went to use the bathroom, on his way back, he accidentally exited through the hallway door. As he was about to go back to the guest room, he noticed a movement in the mandir and went to the railing to get a closer look. Gopi was adding ghee to the eternal lamp then she sat down to meditate with the beads. What is she doing meditating this late at night? Aham thought. He could only see the side of Gopi face but he couldn't help standing there admiring her, she looked so serene and so beautiful in twinkling light of the diyas and the lamp. It was so hard to accept what he believed about her, when he saw her this way. Could she really be so deceitful and so devoted to God at the same time? How can someone who looks like her be a liar and a thief? She had looked devastated when mom told her she couldn't participate in the Navrati puja and this evening she looked so elated that she could participate in the arti. Why am I so ambivalent in my feelings towards her? Sometimes I can't stand the sight of her and others I want to take all her hurt away and protect her from the world. Why am I feeling this way? What has she done to me? Why can't I control my feelings towards her? Or even understand them. When Gopi stood up to put the beads away, Aham snapped out of his trance and went back to the guest room to finish his proposal for the meeting in the morning.
In the mandir, after her meditation, Gopi felt very clear about what she needed to do. She put the beads away and added another spoon of ghee in the eternal lamp and went up the stairs. This time when she passed the guest room she didn't hesitate, she knocked on the door and went in. Aham looked up from his proposal, at first glance, he thought he had imagined Gopi in his doorway. He couldn't believe she was real standing there in front of him. Looking at her face, even though she was trying to hide it in her pallu, was mesmerizing. He wasn't aware how much time past without them saying anything. First Gopi was happy that Ahamji didn't look angry but when he didn't say anything for a long time, she started to get scared. Watching the terrified look coming over her face made Aham mad, his nostrils flared as he took an angry breath. Finally he barked, "What are you doing here?"
Gopi looked even more frightened but bravely said, in a very low voice, "vo ji maih - I need to talk to you about something very important. I don't know what to do and I need help," by the end of this speech Gopi looked like she was going to start crying.
Aham got up from his desk to walk towards Gopi and she took a step back and looked at the door as if she was getting ready to bolt. Aham took a calming breath as he didn't want this to end the usual way, with him yelling and her crying. He said, "bolo," but it still came out very brash.
Gopi took a shaky breath and said, "I don't know what to do."
Aham enounced every word carefully and said, "You already said that, if you want my help then you need to tell me, what is it?"
Gopi felt her eyes tear and encouraged herself by thinking, you can do this Gopi, Ahamji is Kinjalben's brother, he will know what to do. "Vo mujhe maaji ko batana chayai tha but I don't want to hurt her or make her angry. She is under a lot of stress about Kinjalben's rishta."
Aham was getting impatient but at the same time starting to worry, he used his calmest tone because he didn't want Gopi to cry and delay this any further. "If you don't tell me I can't do anything about it. So stop the tears and tell me."
Gopi took a shaky breath and continued, "Kinjalben hasn't been happy since the Mehta rishta came. She looks sad and lost. She never smiles."
Aham, "That doesn't mean anything."
Gopi, "The day after Teej, when the Mehtas were coming to see her, she wanted to go to the spa and maaji asked me to go with her and not to let he out of my sight. But I couldn't do that, I lost Kinjalbed." Now the tears really started to flow but Gopi controlled herself and didn't sob because she knew that would only make Ahamji angry and she really needed him to listen.
Aham frowned and said, "What do you mean, lost her? Weren't you with her the entire time?"
Gopi, "Kinjalben left me in the facial room and went to a different room to get hers. But when I came out she was gone and I couldn't find her. The women at the spa said she left without me. I didn't have any money to pay the bill."
Aham loosing patience, "So that is what this is all about, you want money!"
Gopi, "No!"
Aham, "Then what is it?"
Gopi, "She left the spa without me."
Aham, "Where did she go?"
Gopi, "I don't know, because when I came home, I ran into her outside the house and she said she had been at the spa the entire time. But I know she wasn't there because I looked for everywhere and the women at the spa saw her leave."
Aham's frown became deeper and for a few minutes neither of them said anything.
Gopi, "When we came inside, Kinjalben said we were late because we had pani puri. But we didn't."
Aham, "Is that it?"
Gopi, "No then last night, when the lights were out, maaji bumped into someone in the upstairs hallway. Kinjalbed said it was her but I saw Kinjalben help a boy run out the back window."
Aham, "WHAT?"
Gopi looked petrified and as if she was about to collapse. But she nodded yes.
Aham again tried gather to his patience and took another calming breath and said, "Do you know what you're saying?"
Gopi did't know how to respond but gathered courage from the fact that Ahamji was still listening to her and not yelling, said, "That is what I saw but don't know what it means. I am really worried about her and don't know what to do so I came to talk with you. Maaji is already very stressed about Kinjal ben's rishta and I don't want to add anymore on her. She takes on too much as it is and this will really upset and hurt her." Gopi wasn't crying but the tears kept flowing. As Gopi spoke Aham felt his anger drain out him, in its wake felt waves of calmness come over him with each word Gopi spoke. Her gentle voice was like drinking cold water after a long hike on a hot sunny day in July. Aham looked at Gopi, really looked at Gopi and thought how did I miss this before? Gopi was looking at Aham expectantly and he realized she waiting for his response. Aham moved to the window, looking at the sky always helped him think.
Aham, "How long has this been going on?"
Gopi was ecstatic that Ahamji was asking for her opinion. She moved closer to him towards the window and said, "I don't know how long but I have noticed that she is not really happy ever since the rishta from the Mehta family. I almost forgot I saw her packing a suitcase."
Aham was startled by this additional information and turned back toward Gopi and said, "When was this?"
Gopi, "Last night and when I asked her about it, she said she was sorting her old clothes. Do you think it means anything?"
Aham, "I don't know but I will find out."
He remembered last year, at Anita's graduation party, Kinjal had spent the entire evening with Umang. They behaved as if they had known each other for a long time. He had forgotten that incident but now wondered if Umang and Kinjal had something between them. It would make sense for him to interfere when Kinjal's rishta was being set. Umang was the most deceitful man Aham had ever met. He had tried to engage him in a shady business deal and was livid when Aham didn't fall for it. It would make sense for him to surface now. He better deal with this without mom finding out.
Aham said to Gopi, "You did the right thing by coming to me about this. I will take care of this!"
Gopi was maha pleased with Aham's reaction and didn't know what to do. For a few minutes she looked back at Aham to admire him, while Aham did the same. Then she got embarrassed and looked away from Aham. Not knowing what else to do, she slowly turned to leave the room. As she was turning her foot got stuck in her sari and she lost her balance. Aham quickly reached out to help her but he too tangled his foot in her sari and lost his balance. Aham put his arms around her to break her fall but ended up landing on his back with with Gopi on top of him. There was Aham on his back on the floor with Gopi in his arms. She tried to pull away but Aham held her tight. Gopi's pallu had fallen off her head during the fall and her long straight black hair fanned out all over Aham's face.
For Aham this felt like coming home after being lost forever. He had never felt this attracted to anyone in his entire life. Or felt the kind of serenity he felt at this moment or this sense of homecoming or this sense of rightness. What was all this? How did this happen? Who was this woman in my arms? How did she bring him to this spot? Why did he want to stay like this forever?
Gopi didn't know what was going on, all she knew was that she was breathing the same air as Ahamji and Ahamji had his arms around her. For the very first time in her life she felt like she had come home. She was in after being out in the rain for a long time.
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