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Disclaimer: SR topic you know the rules, if not please go and refresh your memory! 😳
Hey guys,
I have been meaning to put this topic up last week but due to exams wasn't able to so I thought why not today, better late then never 😆!
Sid's prespective.
Call me a jerk, call me a fool, hate me but don't you dare question me! 😡 What do you know about how I am feeling what I am thinking? Even I don't know what I am doing is right or wrong, maybe I am listening to my mind and not my heart but for my heart and mind to think as one my mind needs to stop thinking and that will never happen, but one thing they both want is her happiness.
One says I am the happiness, the other says Armaan is the happiness, I have seen their love and how can I be the one that comes in the way of that. But why is she still with me? Why can't she go? I need to learn to live without her, she walked in and saved me, I saved her, we are even but why can't I let go, why is there still a pain an emptiness within. How did she become the most important thing in my life someone I would give all my happiness for just to see that one smile, why do I burn with jealously when I think she is happy but not with me.
I need it all to STOP! I need someone to tell me that everthing is going to be ok, Riddhima held my hand gave me support, but I turned it away I don't want her support if it is an obligation, I don't want her to stay with me if it cause of a marriage that has never been a marriage, I don't want her as a friend, I want someone who will walk with me, speak to me, listen to me, share their life with me because they want to not because they have to, I am not going to be the reason for someone's unhappiness because I can't respect the truth! I can't live a lie, it was hard enough the first time, until the lie gained some truth but this time do I have the courage to do this. Am I being weak walking away without fighting?
But I am done fighting, I am done feeling, I want nothing now, I have no direction at the moment, all I know is I want out, out of feeling, out of believing, out of hoping. Today I saw her, as a dulhan a happy one as well, she had a smile that made me melt, was she happy with me? Why can't she let me go? Why is forcing me to act as her husband, why all these rituals, all this drama, Natak? She went to get my blessing why? Why become a wife? I don't want a wife, a wife that reminds me she is only with me because we are married not because she wants to be, she needs to set us both free, leave and be happy and I shall live, I shall find a way, I may not love anyone else again but I will find a way to live without you because I will know you are happy, with a man you love not with a man you are forced to be with.
Riddhima's perspective
Sid, the one name that makes me melt, the one person that has effected me so much that I can't even imagine my life without him, he saved me when I was dying, no correction when I was dead, I had lost everything and he held my hand he made me rise from the dead, he gave me meaning and a reason to live.
How can I tell him this when he doesn't want to listen? He thinks I have betrayed his trust, I have but not in the way he believes, I have betrayed his trust by not telling him I am with him through thick and thin, he is the man I want to grow old with, he is the man I see my future with, I am not going to deny I had a past with another man but he needs to understand that is the past and that's where it will remain for the rest of time.
His words aren't hurting me, they are tearing me into pieces, I need him to understand he is my future, when I saw him on KC, I thought everything will be alright, he cares, he is still Sid with the heart of gold, he innonence on his face was seen when he was looking at me, I thought I could stand there forever, I wish time had stopped because everything was prefect then but the reality swept through and Sid was back to being hurtful. I have seen his hate and pain before but this was something else, ealier there was hope but now there isn't any hope, he isn't speaking to me and when he is all he is saying is leave me, go away from here, before he told me to leave but he was still supporting me now, he isn't supporting me, he just wants me gone. Have I hurt him so much that he can't even look at me.
All I know is I want Siddhant Modi in my life, but one thing is certain he may leave me, but I won't leave him and even if I am not physically with him I will be by his side, I will never stop holding his hand, I will make sure he gets every happiness and all the support he needs even if it kills me.
Peace out! 😳
Hey guys,
I have been meaning to put this topic up last week but due to exams wasn't able to so I thought why not today, better late then never 😆!
Sid's prespective.
Call me a jerk, call me a fool, hate me but don't you dare question me! 😡 What do you know about how I am feeling what I am thinking? Even I don't know what I am doing is right or wrong, maybe I am listening to my mind and not my heart but for my heart and mind to think as one my mind needs to stop thinking and that will never happen, but one thing they both want is her happiness.
One says I am the happiness, the other says Armaan is the happiness, I have seen their love and how can I be the one that comes in the way of that. But why is she still with me? Why can't she go? I need to learn to live without her, she walked in and saved me, I saved her, we are even but why can't I let go, why is there still a pain an emptiness within. How did she become the most important thing in my life someone I would give all my happiness for just to see that one smile, why do I burn with jealously when I think she is happy but not with me.
I need it all to STOP! I need someone to tell me that everthing is going to be ok, Riddhima held my hand gave me support, but I turned it away I don't want her support if it is an obligation, I don't want her to stay with me if it cause of a marriage that has never been a marriage, I don't want her as a friend, I want someone who will walk with me, speak to me, listen to me, share their life with me because they want to not because they have to, I am not going to be the reason for someone's unhappiness because I can't respect the truth! I can't live a lie, it was hard enough the first time, until the lie gained some truth but this time do I have the courage to do this. Am I being weak walking away without fighting?
But I am done fighting, I am done feeling, I want nothing now, I have no direction at the moment, all I know is I want out, out of feeling, out of believing, out of hoping. Today I saw her, as a dulhan a happy one as well, she had a smile that made me melt, was she happy with me? Why can't she let me go? Why is forcing me to act as her husband, why all these rituals, all this drama, Natak? She went to get my blessing why? Why become a wife? I don't want a wife, a wife that reminds me she is only with me because we are married not because she wants to be, she needs to set us both free, leave and be happy and I shall live, I shall find a way, I may not love anyone else again but I will find a way to live without you because I will know you are happy, with a man you love not with a man you are forced to be with.
Riddhima's perspective
Sid, the one name that makes me melt, the one person that has effected me so much that I can't even imagine my life without him, he saved me when I was dying, no correction when I was dead, I had lost everything and he held my hand he made me rise from the dead, he gave me meaning and a reason to live.
How can I tell him this when he doesn't want to listen? He thinks I have betrayed his trust, I have but not in the way he believes, I have betrayed his trust by not telling him I am with him through thick and thin, he is the man I want to grow old with, he is the man I see my future with, I am not going to deny I had a past with another man but he needs to understand that is the past and that's where it will remain for the rest of time.
His words aren't hurting me, they are tearing me into pieces, I need him to understand he is my future, when I saw him on KC, I thought everything will be alright, he cares, he is still Sid with the heart of gold, he innonence on his face was seen when he was looking at me, I thought I could stand there forever, I wish time had stopped because everything was prefect then but the reality swept through and Sid was back to being hurtful. I have seen his hate and pain before but this was something else, ealier there was hope but now there isn't any hope, he isn't speaking to me and when he is all he is saying is leave me, go away from here, before he told me to leave but he was still supporting me now, he isn't supporting me, he just wants me gone. Have I hurt him so much that he can't even look at me.
All I know is I want Siddhant Modi in my life, but one thing is certain he may leave me, but I won't leave him and even if I am not physically with him I will be by his side, I will never stop holding his hand, I will make sure he gets every happiness and all the support he needs even if it kills me.
Peace out! 😳
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