She wont take me back or even TALK to me, help!!

Jas0nx420 thumbnail
Posted: 15 years ago
#1

 So theres this girl Victoria right.. that i'm like totally in love with, and have been for really almost 2 years now.  Anyways, we first met at work.. where we started talking and soon became really close friends.. I mean, close enough to the point where we would often even cuddle and sleep together(no sex).. after about a year of this I did something that in hindsight, probably wasn't the best idea.  I just couldn't control myself!  I basically spilled my guts and told her how I felt.  There was this sort of awkward feeling in the air.. and in not so few words- told me that she really only saw me as a friend.  OUCH.  I acted like it was ok no problem, but this really screwed my head up, and I noticed after I said that we were still real close but she began to distance herself a little.

So at this point im in this sort of paniced frenzy.  I start scouring the internet for advice or guidance.. and I came across this one website: dating.pcti-system. com .. Which is this online dating/attraction learning course type thing.  So long story short I wound up signing up for it... Much of the info, lessons, and things it teaches you didn't quite click or make sense to my logic at the time.  But after my amazing screw-up.. I was jus like f**k it, nothing much to lose.  So I started employing these methods.. And long story short.. this shit worked f**king INCREDIBLY.. I can't quite explain it, this girl just ate it all up.  All I can say.. at least for me, everything we think females want, or like, or what makes sense.. you can bet is almost the EXACT opposite.  It's incredible.  Women are really strange ill-logical creatures.. no offense to any girls out there.  Anyways, after a couple months of this going back and forth we eventually wound up in a relationship, and even had sex a couple times.. it was amazing and so surreal it all happened so fast... so onto my question-

I guess with my newfound "game" .. I got a little too ahead of myself and wound up meeting this girl off myspace and ended up having sex with her.. Then one day Vic was at my house and I left my myspace page open.. she went snooping and discovered EVERYTHING.. I don't even know what I was thinking when I decided to go off and do this.. but she confronted me, I was dumbfounded lost for words, she smacked me SO hard across my face, told me she hated me n never wanted to speak 2 me again.. then left.  I truly am sorry I could give a shit about this other girl.  For the past week I've been trying to contact her every day and shes COMPLETELY avoiding me.. it's driving me f**king insane.  I had everything I ever wanted and totally f**ked it up .. Is there any way to turn this thing around?? =(  Help!

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chrissa thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#2
well... she has every right 2 be upset... wt u did 2 her.. was disgusting and pathetic.. u onil have urslef 2 blame... i am a gurl ryt, and if i ws in her shoes, i wud neva forgiv u.. u broke her trust and her heart,, wt do u expect? her to open her arms and forgive u.. well to be honest if she forgave u, i would say she is a nutter. i think u deserved tht slap. if i ws der, i wud have done alot more..
chrissa thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#3

if u think u cn cheat on gurls and expect dem 2 forgiv u, den u cn jus forget it..if she does forgiv u she is a nutter.

dream thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#4
i dont think you should expect the girl to forgive u..don't mind but my personal opinion is that you can't expect her to forgive you after what u have done..i mean if u had loved her then how can you be with someone else..n if u r with some1 else then why do you want her back?..sorry to say but if i was her i dont think i would have forgiven!
-Mystery- thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#5
Advice/Help topics belong to Advice Corner not Love and Friendship forum.

Hence, I'm moving it to Advice Corner.

In case of any comments/suggestions/questions, PM me.

-Mahi
nulz thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#6

Wow .. 1st of all if u truly loved her than y on earth would u cheat??? I mean using the help of the website to get her to fall for u is one thing but going behind her back and two timing .. that's just not on .. totally WRONG!!

 

My advice to you .. if she doesn't want to talk to u .. give her some space .. u should understand that fact that she is really hurt by ur actions .. u say u work together so I guess u must see her everyday .. keep a distance .. let her recover .. a smile and hi/hello is alright .. if she even looks at u that is .. let some time pass.

 

When u feel that u can communicate with her .. if not face to face, send her an email .. spill ur heart out .. tell her how sorry u are and how u feel about her … if after all that she allows u back into her life then u should consider urself very very lucky and vow to never ever break her trust again .. if she doesn't take u back .. then tough luck .. u should just accept it how it is .. u stuffed up and there is no going back.

xsweetbabygyalx thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#7
1st of all.....😲......u should had waited for her to respond to you back after you told her ur feelings.......it possibly takes some girls some time to think about it over and over because when we dont love a guy back the way he loves us, we think about it over and over to ensure ourselves until we can make up our mind......everybody makes mistakes, it s good that u realized ur mistake but it's ok because u learned.....i hate to tell u this, dont expect her to forgive u.....apologize through flowers, send her flowers but dont put ur name on it, jst write "i'm really sorry" if u really mean it from ur heart on the flower bouquet u send her......may be she lied to u about her liking u as a friend and no more than that, this explains the reason why she slapped u after she discovered what u wer doing behind her back......the one mistake u made was loosing ur patience......u should had waited to hear her answer......i am pretty sure she probably got scared when u confessed ur feelings to her as u said everything went too fast, this is why she kept ignoring u at the beginning before you cheated on her......I mean think about it......wouldn't u freak out if a girl confessed her feelings to u......u would ignore her in the beginning right.......when you see her did the samething u did to her, it would upset u right.....basically try to imagine what she's going through right now..
 
from my own personal experience......we girls basically need some time to express our feelings to the guy who we love and we want to ensure we love them back because we don't want to lie to u guys......yes, my boyfriend did expressed his feelings to me first but he waited for 4 months to hear my answer......4 months is a long time.......u should had waited a bit longer.....that was the only mistake u had made.
 
my advice to you is......give her some time to recover.......send her a flower bouquet apologizing.......send her favorite flowers, put it on her desk without ur name on it........don't talk to her......u giving her the silent treatment would work.......if she looks at u, wave or smile HI then but otherwise don't try to force her to talk to u, that can mess up urs and Victoria's relationship more......chances are, she will forgive u. I hope😕
 
best of luck 😊
 
if she doesn't forgive u thn u would have to accept the fact and move on with life.
Jiannax143 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#8
girls want trust in a relationship she trusted u and u ruined it all..just imagine how u felt when she thought of u as a friend...it definitely hurt but u still had a chance....right now she feels betrayed and u shouldn't have done that if u were committed u shouldnt have done it....its gonna take a lot to get her trust back cause u have no way of proving urself right whatever u did looks bad in every aspect
.she might think u went to her (other girl ) because she couldnt keep u happy so she might see her own fault in this but i say she has every right to act the way she is acting
ur going to have to work really hard to get her trust back and idk how to help u with that


Robsessed. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#9

Why would you sleep with another girl if you liked another girl? 8-)

I think you both need to talk about the situation, and then wait for her answer whether she wants to talk to you or not and by the way; I think she's not talking to you still 'cos she's either hurt or confused if you still like her.
 
Good luck x