From & To Sathish #5 - Page 129

Avan, Aval Adhu 416

Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like. Amor Fati – Love Your Fate, which is in fact your life.

I sometimes look up at the skies and wonder if life is really a sort of test. Some kind of exam that the unknown power, an entity we call God is putting us through. I talk to that power and ask it, ' Boss, any quotas, or reservations for those lives who find it difficult and are unable to score good marks because fate has not been too kind to them.'

Well, as you know very well, God never answers and cleverly makes me answer my own questions. Well, that is what expensive Psychologists and Psychiatrists do or at least attempt to do. Place your own cards on the table and make you read and understand the game of life. You come away from the table realizing that life is not easy and that you win some and lose some and sometimes and some days you lose everything.

Gayatri stared at her mobile phone with guilt and pain wracking her body and wrecking her already broken mind and wisely decided that she would return Madhu's call when she was in a better mood and when her heart was in a better place.

Then he called, and the moment, she saw his name flash on her screen, Gayatri froze and experienced a gamut of emotions. Both in her body and in her soul.

' Is it you, Ravi who is calling or is it your mother or Partha? Why? Baby, has something bad happened to you? ' Gayatri asked herself and then she heard the pilot's voice welcoming her and the rest of the passengers and requesting the cabin crew to begin their instructions.'

She was stuck between answering and not answering and wanting to know and not wanting to know about Ravi and his health and finally succumbed to her broken heart.

She slid the green and whispered hello and immediately heard Ravi's voice loud, clear, alive, and healthy and it filled her with joy and peace.

' Ravi, is it really you? Are you okay?'

' Yes, Gayatri. I am okay. Where are you?'

Gayatri fell silent and searched desperately for the right words and the right words seemed to find Ravi before she said them.

Ravi's keen ears picked up the sounds and then he heard loud and clear the pilot's voice as he welcomed all the passengers on the Air France flight to Paris.

' So, you are flying away?'

Gayatri tried to speak but words failed her and then she heard Ravi say, ' Maybe it is all for the good ' and then before he could say anything more, she disconnected the call and switched off the phone and dropped it into her handbag and began to cry out the shattered and torn pieces of her heart through her tears.

A gentle hand touched her shoulder and she looked up and saw one of the cabin crew staring at her and raised a finger indicating that she would be back in a moment. She returned a few moments later and placed a tray that held a glass of shining amber liquid.

' Sometimes, a drink will lessen if not dull the pain while your mind catches up with the heart and begins its process of healing ' she said softly and then added, ' Love. Strangely, we cannot exist without it and at the same time we cannot live happily with it.'

Gayatri thanked her and raising the glass whispered ' Cheers ' and taking a large sip of it, smiled sadly and said, " That is why love is both heaven and hell".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNW3AkbDTBI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_TiN0FawU8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDj1JTtJOSY

Avan, Aval Adhu 417

Gayatri remembered the moment when she realized that she was pregnant and the moment she placed a hand on her tummy she knew she was carrying her son. But, alcohol, drugs, and daily fights had resulted in one day Siddarth her ex-husband lashing out at her with his leg that had left Gayatri thrown against the wall.

Gayatri remembered that moment vividly and the sharp pain that she had felt in her womb that had been quickly followed by an even greater pain that she felt constricting her chest. Looking down and seeing blood between her legs, Gayatri had known instantly that she had lost her son and in the process had lost a part of her already dead soul

Gayatri looked down as the plane left Delhi and would soon leave India behind and felt the same pain that she had felt when she had lost her child.

' Life, oh cruel life. You took away my child's life through a miscarriage and now you have taken away my life through another miscarriage. Then I was a drunk and a junkie. But why now? Why make me meet him and why make me fall in love with him when you know his heart is somewhere else and belongs to someone else? Am I cursed and meant just to suffer and live out my life in loneliness and sorrow?'

The Air France flight flew away from India carrying Gayatri, one of our heroines and flew away from our story at this moment. But she will return. The prodigal step-daughter will return when the time comes to end this story and that time and end is near and around the corner. ( I hope it makes some of you happy for soon there will be no more of Azhagan and his universe and other stories concerning The boy who went into the dark and came back with light).

A mother knows when her only child is in despair and in pain and she senses it all from just the way the child stands, looks, and walks and from the way his shoulders slumped, Rasaathi Ammal knew that Ravi was sad and she knew the reason for his pain.

' Did you just call Gayatri?'

Ravi stood like a statue and answered like a machine and did both without turning to face his mother.

' Yes.'

' and?'

'And what?'

' Do you have any idea where is she now? Is she coming back? Have you told her anything?'

' No, no, and no again for all three of your questions.'

Then Ravi slowly turned and looked at his mother and in a sad and frustrated voice said, ' I should be happy and I should feel like I am on top of the world and I do feel both. But...'

' Stop it, Ravi. Please stop it right now' Rasaathi Ammal growled and raised her right palm, ' promise me right now.'

Feeling a bit flustered, he looked at his mother with confusion, ' Promise what?'

' Promise me that you will not speak about Gayatri ever again. Promise me that you will forget her and that you will never ever mention her or broach the subject to Madhurima.'

Ravi looked away and growled back, ' How can I promise you all of that? Do you want me to lie to Madhu?'

Rasaathi Ammal glowered angrily at him and asked him in a scathing voice, ' Are you my son or are you Lord Harischandras son?'

Raising her right palm even higher, ' You are my son and a mere mortal. So stop pretending to be an angel and promise me that you will never talk about Gayatri in this house again. She was the one who went away. She is the one who left you and walked away. But now Madhu is here and she is the one who brought you back to life and has brought back life and happiness to all our lives.'

Seeing him hesitate, Rasaathi Ammal delivered the coup de grace death blow, ' Promise me or I promise you that I will walk out of the house right this moment and leave Kumarapalayam forever.'

' Amma, what is gotten into you? Why are you talking in this manner?'

Rasaathi Ammal's eyes grew large in anger and that meant red and crimson filled her eyes and cheeks as she raged and whispered, ' The world might worship you for your achievements and think you are a heaven-sent angel but for me, for your mother, you are a burden. A constant source of pain and worry and that too in my old age when I should live out my life in peace and happiness. '

Then before she could say more, Ravi placed his hand on hers and said, ' I promise.'

Avan, Aval Adhu 418

“Living out your dreams can be more therapeutic than analyzing them.”

Parthiban turned and walked away from his wife Daksha and tried his best to remain calm and stare at the books that stared back at him and lost. His best attempts to stay quiet and not ask any questions were beaten and he quickly walked back and asked anxiously, ' Ducks, if Ravi is trying to get in touch with Gayatri, then what is his mother doing by going there and disturbing him? Why can't she just let him be?'

Daksha smiled and said, ' She is doing the same thing that Ravi is doing.'

Partha shrugged his shoulders in confusion and asked, ' What do you mean the same thing that Ravi is doing?'

' I mean she is trying to get in touch with her son like her son is getting in touch with his ex.'

Exhaling loudly, he asked frustratedly, ' Aiyo, why are you bullying me, Ducks? Just spell it out for me, please.'

Daksha looked at Parthiban in astonishment and seeing her staring at him in wonder, he smiled, ' Woman, what are you staring at me like that for? You know very well that I get all turned on and hard when your eyes fall rove over me like they are doing right now. Step checking me out.'

' I am sorry, hubby. Yes, you are correct. My eyes are indeed roving over you but in disapproval and in astonishment. That is why I am checking you out for any symptoms of a mild stroke or a sudden onset of some strange debilitating brain disease.

Parthiban grinned and grimaced and finally succumbed to her will and glare and said, ' Sorry, ducks.'

' My sweet, horny but stupid husband, Ravi's mother is right now most probably telling him not to mention anything about Gayatri to Madhu and maybe she is right.'

' Why not, Ducks? ' Partha replied casually and catching her angry glare quickly added, ' Well, okay. I guess they did sleep with each other and I guess they maybe did fall slightly in love.'

Daksha raised her hand and stilled him, ' Puppy, hush now while I think and connect some dots that have been refusing to connect for a few days now.'

Parthiban whimpered slightly, ' By dots, you mean stuff, questions, and puzzles. Right, babe?'

' Yes, Partha. I mean them exactly ' Daksha mumbled and then she looked at him sharply and asked, ' Can I ask you a question? A very personal question about Ravi.'

Partha looked at her with fear and nodded and waited with bated breath wondering what weird question was going to pop out of his wise, wonderful but weird wife's mouth.

' What do you know about Ravi's life? I mean his .....'

Parthiban stared at her, ' Ravi's life? Babe, you practically know everything about him and his life. Then why...' and stopped seeing her eyes that dropped down to his genitals and went, ' Oh! you mean his sex life?' Ravi and sex. I think a monk would stand a better chance of getting laid than our master.'

Daksha looked at him, ' Yet, you and I know in our hearts that he and Gayatri had sex in our resort that morning when they went out for a walk.'

Parthiban blushed and nodded, ' I guess so.'

Daksha sighed and throwing her hands up into the air, growled, ' Why? Why and what made Ravi fall for Gayatri and that too just after a few days since their first meeting?'

Partha nodded, ' You are right ducks for it is pretty odd and unnatural behaviour on Ravi's part and we know him better than that.'

Daksha flicked her fingers, ' If what we know about Ravi is right then he saw something in her that reminded him of Madhu and he more or less confessed to that in front of her and us that night.'

Parthiban who was really lost now asked her, ' Okay, I will bite and I will ask it. Where are you going with this train of thought and why now?'

Daksha smiled and looked at him, ' Like I said, puzzles, questions, and unconnected dots. Something triggered Gayatri that night and which led to all of this and what has transpired.'

Totally lost and clueless, he looked at her and she said, ' Idiot, Gayatri, and Ravi were all lovey-dovey that night and then something set her off. Something triggered her anger and looking back now something broke in her and that is what led her to get angry and which ultimately led to Ravi going out and confronting those thugs that entered our resort.'

Grabbing Partha's shirt, ' Baby, Ravi had planned our escape route and we had all collectively decided not to take on those thugs and yet we were forced into the confrontation that night and then you have that second question.'

' Babe, what second question?' Partha asked her absentmindedly and the next moment, squealed like a kitten when Daksha knuckled him on his head and glared at him and said, ' Ek Nai Paheli. Aboorva Raagangal. The film directed by the great director, K.Balachandar whose story is about a father falling in love with a younger woman the daughter while his son falls in love with the younger woman's mother.'

I began writing to escape reality. Through my writing, I released my pain, suffering, and burdens. Then I began sharing all of them in this forum. I don't know why people write but I have stated clearly why I write, and now please allow me to explain a little more emphatically why I pen my thoughts, and I do that too on a nearly constant and daily basis.

We have but one life. One journey and all of us are seeking that station called peace and that mythical unicorn station called perfection.

I am sorry but in my opinion and according to my experiences, neither exist.

That apart, what remains is the journey, the ride, the travel of life. In joy and in sorrow.

What each one of us can do and the least each one of us can do is not step on the other who is already in pain and in suffering?

What each and one of us can do is not pick holes and find faults in others' thoughts and thought processes.

I am a simpleton and a simple soul from a very lower class of society. I don't know much about class and manners and etiquette like those who come from high-class and well-educated homes and who live abroad.

I write what I know and feel and that is all I can do and all I ask, beg is that I am not judged too harshly.

Thank you. I wish all of you a beautiful day.

https://youtu.be/OQ_FSF41YAk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vQi9kJvuss

And just like that he stole the scene by being natural and yes, classy and they say that he cannot act.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PW1fYqfEcT4