||DOTW||6th April Sons & Daughters. . - Page 3

Sawsthi with Urmi she puts a monetary slant on relations. Had Rashi been a boy then the pampering would have been there from the start and the pushing for him to do well so that he would make oodles of money and keep her in her old age in the manner she wants. Now I suspect that she did not differentiate between having Rashi or a son in the early years. She would have too busy cribbing that Jitu did not bring in enough but from the start would have taught Rashi that she is the best and that money, status and luxuries were what counted no matter how she achieved them. She married Rashi into the Modi household, first by hook and then by crook. Faced with Rashi producing twin girls dented her image of Rashi lording over MM. Would she have gone through with an abortion had the babies been girls and convinced Rashi that it was for the best?

Xari, I think the answer to your question is Yes Urmi would have gone for an abortion for Rashi.. No.. let me take that back. She would have killed Meera so that Rashi's children, girl or boy would not have the competition.. 🤢

There is something else though that is gnawing at me for the past couple of days.. I sincerely believe that Koki showed no difference between Ahem and Kinjal because Kinjal was a girl. It was more to do with that fact that Kinjal was a rebel and needed to be punished rather than for the fact that she was a girl.

But the past two days of Koki's anger made me think in a different direction. Lets take Gopi and Dhawal. Gopi is Koki's DIL and Dhawal her SIL.
For all Dhawal's blind belief in urmi, Koki still treats him with respect that we do not see her give Gopi. Why is that? Why is the DIL anyless than the SIL. Both are not blood relations and both are married to you own blood.

So why is it that we give more consideration when it comes to Son-in-laws and don't extend the same courtesy to our DILs?

Harini one would think that parents treat their sons-in-law like princes in order that their daughter does not come into any hardship at their hands. I just don't understand the tradition for DILs coming into a new house and being treated like the maid and not one of the family. Every episode I see, even at meal times the DILs are serving all the family members including the daughters of the family before they sit and eat themselves. Why do in-laws see it as a god given right to treat them so?

No idea Xari.. I have been fortunate enough to be in a family that does not adhere to this..

Mostly in families from where I grew up, the men eat first and the children along with them mainly because

1. We don't use dining tables often which means that someone has to serve food and men who go to work need to be on time and so women decide to eat a bit later

2. Mothers first feed their children and then eat as it becomes easier to finish the work and then have a leisurely meal while the menfolk distract the kids for sometime after the meal..

3. All women get the meal time to gossip 😆 They trade stories and give suggestions..

Never seen a DIL asked to eat separately like it is shown. Usually the woman eat a bit later.. But at times woman earlier if they are feeding or not well..

One may ask why woman should not eat before men.. Maybe because of convenience and then it just became a habit..

It is easier to serve than just lay everything on the table because it becomes easier while cleaning.. Practically that is.. But if the discrimination is based on DIL, one cannot accept it.


So the son-in-laws are treated well to make sure a person's daughter is treated well in her sasural.. Should that not apply to the DIL too? She is someone's daughter. .So what one expects, one should do too right?

Swetha nice comment. Gender inequality will exist for a long time to come. It has been there for eons, check my poem and while there are enough people who believe that a woman is inferior it will continue to be an uphill struggle. Daughters should not be seen as any less than sons and women should not just be seen as a body. It saddens me to see how some educated women go back an evolution step once they get married and go back two or more steps when they become MILs.