'And, for his extremely valuable services for the nation, we award him the highest gallantry award our country could give. He is the heartthrob of our nation. We hope, that everyday, soldiers are born with such dedication and respect as Captain Rajveer Singh Shekhawat.'
She jolted awake again, for the millionth time that week. Her hair was askew and sweat was running down her face. It was the same dream, the last time she had seen him before he was killed. She didn't even get to tell him how much she had loved him, how she loves him so much that it hurts her, both physically and mentally. She never got the chance before he was gone.
She knew sleep wasn't going to come again tonight. Instead she put on her robe and a pair of slippers and walked out of her room into the moonlit garden. It was his house.. he had given it to her in his will, and she, wanting to be close to him all the time, had accepted it. The house smelt of him, had an aura of him, everything about the house literally screamed out his name.
She kept on walking, shivering in the cold, when she heard a distinct voice, "Schadenfreude."
She turned around to look who it was, but there was no one. Dismissing it as her misconception, she kept on walking. This time the voice was louder.. "Schadenfreude."
"Naina." She turned so fast, that she almost fell down on the ground, and that's when she saw him standing there.
"How are you?" she couldn't reply, how could she? It was her best friend, and she couldn't lie to him, him of all people.
"Naina," he whispered again, "I know you're in pain, Naina, but you need to let go. Let go of him, and move on. He's memory now, you can't bring back the dead, remember that."
She looked up at him, and saw his hair falling on his face slightly, and as he raised her chin upwards towards him, she understood what he was saying was true.
She couldn't bring back the dead.
She needed to let go.
She was in pain.
She had to move on.
She saw him smile, and one small part of her heart came alive again, after what seemed like decades. And she didn't object when he took her in his arms. She didn't object when he tenderly kissed her forehead. She felt almost safe, not like with him, but almost safe. Misery needed company, she mused, and for now it was okay. She was okay. She saw him smile, as he murmured into her hair, "Taking pleasure from other people's pain."
And she understood.
"Schadenfreude."
'Taking pleasure from other people's pain."
"Schadenfreude."
She gazed up, hoping to find the answer there, and she heard it even louder this time.
"Schadenfreude." The voice sounded suspiciously like him, and for the first time in a long time, she smiled. A true smile. As she fazed up again, she could see him and she heard the word again. This time she licked her lips and mumbled back, "Schadenfreude." The vision disappeared, and as she let herself relax in his arms, she knew that he approved.
As she walked back from the shivering cold, she vowed to herself that she would never forget the one word which changed her life. Schadenfreude
**END**
Well.. I was doing maths for my exam on monday.. and i got tired after like 5 hrs... and this idea came out of nowhere.. and so i just wrote it down.. its pretty sad, but i hope you guys like it. please post your comments if you do.. because they encourage me a lott!!
shreyasi.
ps: schadenfreude means "taking pleasure from other peoples' pain. isnt it a beautiful word?
Anupamaa
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