Smitar's: Loving Khushi #1 Link to # 2 on Pg 1 - Page 30

Originally posted by: B.S.I_Love_You

Yes Please...

Originally posted by: smitar

Will post on Fri morn. An extra long update, maybe in 2 sections!😆

Smita

Originally posted by: B.S.I_Love_You

I love you damn it... 🤗

Smita,😊

Here is the interpretation to Section 2 of Part 2.

This update is about difficult to find, catch, or achieve, may be a person, task or need. Sort of elusive, maybe the action is difficult to recall, something deceptive or deluding.

It is a WILL-O-WISP.

What is will-o-wisp?

It is atmospheric ghost lights seen by travellers at night, especially over bogs, swamps or marshes. It resembles a flickering lamp and is said to recede if approached, drawing travellers from the safe paths. The phenomenon is known by a variety of names, including ignis fatuus meaning foolish fire, jack o' lantern, hinkypunk, and hobby lantern in English folklore and in much of European folklore.

It is used to denote anything that deludes or misleads by luring on; an elusive thing or person, an illusion.

When Khushi left the bedroom she found the living room deserted, offering her prayers to Devi Maiyya she went to the kitchen where she brewed tea for Arnavji as Hari Prakashji was not to be seen. While she was setting the silver tray for Arnavji, Hari Prakashji came in and apologized saying that he had gone with the tea tray for Anjaliji and rest of the members of the house were there too. Khushi giving him a smile that conveyed her thanks for giving her the much needed information without asking, given the volatility of the situation, quickly made her way to Arnavji's bedroom. Her lucky star seemed to be shiny upon her. When she went in she could hear Arnavji voice with the inimitable staccato, speaking to Amanji, standing with his back towards her by the pool. Khushi keeping the tablets that he needed to take beside his tea, placed the tray on the small table by the pool quietly and cleared out. Sensing some movement Arnav turned, and all he could see was a wisp of the end of her duppatta float away like the deluding mist of a mirage. By the time he called out to her she was gone. He cursed himself, for he had hoped to spend a few moments with her. When he looked at the tray he saw the tablets, that she normally handed over to him in person and made sure he took it even when they were at loggerheads, was placed there. Right now, meeting her alone was proving to be as elusive as quicksilver. He realized that the task of getting her to talk was really difficult.

Khushi set the table after preparing the breakfast along with HP, while he took two trays for Nani and Anjali upstairs. While the rest of the family came down for breakfast, Arnav checked on his Di's and followed them. Khushi, who was waiting at the table and serving the food, plied his plate with food. When Arnav asked her to take her seat by his side, she refused saying that she would have it later, with out any inflection keeping an expressionless face. Her listless reponse made the rest look uneasily between the two. Once the breakfast was over, Khushi immersed herself in the mundane task of clearing the table, while Arnav got ready to go. While Payal was seeing Akash off, Khushi did not come out. Seeing even when he was all set to go, she did not come out, he called out to her. Khushi came out reluctantly,mand seeing her reluctance he told her that he needed to speak to her. She accompanied him to the door as she too needed to talk to him. Once away from the prying eyes, observing her beautiful but tired face he told her that, he was needed in the office as there was an important meeting and he would be back by noon, eliciting a nod from her. Knowing that he had only twelve days to woo her, wasting half a day in his office was something not to his liking, but it had turned out to be inevitable.

Khushi told him that she would like to visit Buaji's house and would be back by noon. Arnav looking at her wanting to refuse her let go anywhere could not say so. He just nodded and when he started to say, Di, she told him laconically that, she would not go to Anjaliji's room and she had learnt her lesson the hard way. Her voice was without any emotion, and usage of Anjaliji in place of Di made his eyes widen. When he insisted that she was Di not Anjaliji, Khushi with a wry smile, more of self derision, said that she is Di to her sister not to her as her sister's marriage was not on a contract basis. She knew her feeling otherwise so far had been illusory. Hearing it Arnav felt as though a stone had lodged in his throat and was unable to swallow, and knew he was being stone walled. He felt that Khushi was as slippery as an eel and was inching away from his life. Feeling desolate, leaving his bag on the floor, pulling her into his arms, with her head against his heart, wished he could paint the landscape of her memory with best of delights, erasing off every harsh word he had said, every folly he had committed. Trying to console her, placing a kiss on her hair that was meant to convey, be careful, inhaling the jasmine fragrance, said that things would improve. Di would get better and realize that the fault lay not with her, but with Shyam. She needs a bit of time and asked Khushi to give it. Khushi pulled out of his arms with difficulty, having to fight not only with him but even herself said, that she does not have the luxury of being able to give Anjaliji the time, as she would be out of RM in twelve days time. Anjaliji could take all the time she needed, to come to terms with the misery that her life has fallen to. She would not even stress her by asking for forgiveness. Once she was out of this place, Anjaliji's anger and forgiveness will have no bearing on her. Khushi told all this stoically. She knew she had to be practical and that was what her life had taught her and held her together all the time before. She was under no illusions as to her place in the lives of the Raizadas. Seeing her stoic acceptance and mulish obstinacy, he felt as helpless as the doves caught in a storm, and could do nothing but stare. But he being more stubborn censured, that he would not let her leave him at the end of twelve days. Her retort was, that she did not need his permission to do anything after twelve days as they would cease to be a couple and she would no longer be bound to him. His eyes, showed the hurt at her words and the seeds of panic sprouting with it. When he warned her with a, Khushi, she reminded him that her Jiju was waiting for him, making him warn once again, that was not the end of their conversation. But Khushi being Khushi knew, that her marriage was like a mirage, where things appear but they are not real. Her retort, that they had twelve more days to squabble over it, but whatever he said or did, would not make any difference to her decision to leave on the 15^th of August, left him feeling helpless. Arnav looked at her, silent and helpless, ruing his earlier deeds that were boomeranging back to him. Hearing Akash calling out to him, he left to the office. While Arnav went with Akash, Khushi getting her purse hurried out to Gupta House lest Amma and Buaji come looking for her, today being her birthday.

Though the meeting had gone well, Arnav was disturbed and his heart was sick with the thoughts of Khushi deserting him. His attempts to bring her around were coming to a naught and she was fast becoming impalpable. The stress due to the unpredictability of the outcome of his wooing was rapidly taking its toll on him. His head ached like a herd of elephants tromping around his skull. With the intention of ascertaining that Khushi had returned, he called home, only to find that she had not yet returned and face Mami's querry, whether they had a spat? When he assured her and also himself, that it was not so, she said in jest that both Khussi and Laxmi are missing and to ask Khussi whether she had taken Laxmi with her after all they both were best friends. Though it was said to him in a lighter vein, Mami was showing that Phati saadi had no one in the house who would back her, the only support she can expect was from Laxmi, Nani's pet goat. It was an intentionally ambiguous way of saying Khushi was not welcome at RM. Her concern lay with Anjali and Arnav and Phatti saadi had no place in their life. Arnav extricated himself with difficulty from the conversation.

Coming to know that Khushi was yet to reach RM, he thought of the options he had. One was to call her. Just the very thought of listening to her voice made his heart beat, as fast as an Arabian steed on a race track. But he wondered what could he ask her? Dropping the cell on the table he wondered what to do, while his hand cupped his nape giving it a gentle squeeze. He rolled his neck to ease out the pain. And suddenly he brightened up with the thought, that maybe' he could drop in at GH under the pretext of taking her home. He knew she would be outnumbered and he would have the full support of Buaji and Amma if he insisted that she accompany him. He knew without such tactic she was bound to delay her return and only with tricky manipulations would he be able to get her home with him. With this thought in mind, he rushed out unheedful of an astonished Akash about to enter his cabin.

At GH, all were at dining table sipping tea while they were immersed in deep thought. Buaji's face was sad, like the sun in the day of mist, when his face is watery and dim, and was sighing at regular intervals, sounding like the wind sighing through the trees under rainy skies saying, Poor Anjali Bitiyaa! Poor Arnav Bitwaa! Amma grated her teeth and said that, she was well rid of that knave. Buaji sighing out deeply told, that it would take a long time for Anjali Bitiya to get over the scoundrel. It is most fortunate that she has her Payaliyaa and Titliyaa to comfort her. They would do everything to comfort her. Amma and Babuji concurred with her. Babuji held on to his cup with trembling fingers, a sign of recovery from the stroke, slow but sure. Khushi looking into her tea cup thought that Buaji, Amma and Babuji have vested so much of hopes on her to help Anjaliji! They are under the illusion that their Titliya would be there at RM to shoulder the responsibilities. But the sad part is, they do not even know that she is soon to be back amidst them to plague them. Right now her situation would be incomprehensible to them. She felt tears pooling in her eyes that were like honey-heavy dew. She thought, for the past ten years her family had been bearing the brunt of the scrapes that she had been getting into. Was this the price they had to pay for adopting her? When would this come to an end? With great difficulty, she suppressed her tears. At the query from Buaji, how Arnav Bitwa was? Khushi with a smile said, he was alright, setting their mind at rest. When the door bell rang, Khushi volunteering to open, hoped that it would be Vimla Chachi, who talks nineteen to the dozen and relieve her of being further probe. Then, she thought she would get respite from all the eyes and in privacy of her room, which was lacking in RM, would be able to relieve her heavy heart, knowing that just as heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of water, she too needed the relief.

As she opened the door and she stood still, her heart, fluttering up and down like a butterfly in a garden, at seeing Arnav Singh Raizada looking at her, with his caramel eyes, wide with a smile. She was so engrossed that she forgot to let him in. Seeing no response, Buaji asked who was that? And Khushi managed to say, her Payaliyaa's Jethji! Addressing her husband, in terms of his relation with her sister through her marriage, Khushi has once again given the hint in a subtle and tricky way that any relation as spouse was there only for the next twelve days. Buaji and Amma, oblivious to the true state of affairs rushed to welcome him, chiding Khushi as to why she was not letting Damaadji in and addressing her as Sanka Devi, Buaji stressed, that she was behaving quite crazily. Khushi with great difficulty let him in and her Amma and Buaji greeted him with warmth and affection, exclaiming over the slight loss of weight after the kidnapping.

They hovered around him looking at the marks made by the rope, throwing curses at the rogues who kidnapped him. When Arnav looked at Khushi she replied, that she had told them. Arnav nodded agreeing as to what was there to be gained by hiding it. When Buaji invited him in, he told her that he was on his way home and had come to collect Khushi. Seeing him blink his eyes trying to suppress the headache, Buaji made him sit at the dining table and ordered Khushi to prepare ginger tea that would reduce the pounding in his head. When he greeted Babuji, receiving a folded hand greeting in return, he was wonderstruck. Seeing it Amma whispered, that he was much better now and was able to drink by himself and utter a few words. Buaji added that, physiotherapy was doing wonders and her massaging too has contributed to it. Arnav was truly delighted with the progress and smiled at Babuji, and in return received a lopsided smile. As Khushi brought tea, she was forced to sit by his side as that was the only vacant chair. Arnav sipping the tea, stole glances at Khushi and observed, that she was unusually silent and had grown pale like a flower that is cut off. When Buaji asked him how Anjali Bitiyaa was, he kept silent. Amma added that Khushi told them that he had found out the truth about Shyam and it must have been a big jolt to Anjali Bitiyaa. Buaji lamented saying, Bitiyaa had believed him to be a loving person. She had loved and had placed her implicit trust in him and he was totally an unfit for her love and trust. Arnav just nodded and thought, it was incomprehensible as to how he could not see through Shyam for such a long time! Shyam was one fine actor. Buaji opened up and admitted with shame that it was her fault, when he had said that he was from Lucknow, an orphan and was in need of a room to stay she had believed him and taken him as a boarder. She was taken in by his Lucknavi manners, smooth and cultured talk and had never dreamt that he was double-tongued as well as double-faced person. Arnav could see the pain and guilt in their eyes for not having seen through and said, he had tricked all of them. Buaji hit her forehead saying, she should have seen through when he was absent for long periods saying he was travelling, but they had not doubted his words. When Shashi Babua fell ill, their thought had centered on getting the two daughters married. Seeing this, Shyam taking advantage had asked for Titliyaa's hand and she had thought getting such a good proposal was a blessing. Moreover, he would stay with them along with him liking Khussi and keeping her happy. Her words angered Arnav and made him grind teeth silently resulting in a clenched jaw and hard chin with muscles jumping near the jawline. Buaji admitted that Titliyaa was not at all for the marriage. Amma added that every time they suggested, she kept on refusing. Buaji continued saying that, she tried to force her and had relentlessly pressurized her but she never budged. Amma once again added that, finally on Diwali night she agreed. Arnav whipped his head up, like a an invisible whip being cracked, and looked at Khushi. Her eyes skittered away while her hands were held in tight clasp on her lap with blood drained out. Buaji and Amma were unaware of all that was going on between them. Buaji asked Arnav, whether he remembered that night, he had dropped her back? Arnav did not need Buaji to remind him of that night. The night he had hurt her so much, the night he had humiliated her to no end, the night he had made her shed the pearly tears as he had ripped her heart into shreds. His quiver of errors was being filled rapidly and was growing like a weed. He realized he was on a slippery surface. It was a miracle that she was still talking to him. He tried to swallow his pain, but could not. Buaji and Amma continuing their narration taking turns told him that, within a few minutes after he left, Shyam had turned up. Somebody had written graffiti on the wall of their house linking Shyam and Khushi in an unpalatable way. Her father had a seizure hearing this and did not fancy mud slinging on his daughter. She was cornered and she was forced to accept him. They were forced to conduct the engagement that night itself.

By then Amma, Buaji and Babuji were tearful and filled with remorse for having placed their Titliyaa's head on the anvil unknowingly. Buaji with a frown told that, she had been the resident of the locality for twenty years and knows every one here. She wondered, who would dare to write such nonsense about her neice on the wall? Arnav pointed that, it could be Shyam's handiwork, hiring someone to do it for him. Arnav now had a fair idea of the nefarious nature of his haloed Jiju. They all agreed that it must be so and they had never thought about the incident in this way. Amma's heart twisted at what they had put Khushi through and sighed at the way they had forced the unwilling girl. Khushi looked at the finger, where she had worn Shyam's ring while Arnav nodded at what they said. Overcome by hatred, Buaji gasped, scoundrel, while Bauji squeezed his hands clutching the arms of his chair as though it was Shyam's neck. Once again, all those present were introduced to illusory ways of Shyam Manohar Jha. He had not only lied to them, but also tricked them to the degree that was incomprehensible at that time. The glib lawyer had ascertained that his actions were all premeditated and were made to appear as a favour and hoodwinked all of them. He kept all in an illusory state while he bamboozled them. While thoughts of violence of varied degree was hovering in the hearts of all those present in the room, Buaji addressing Arnav said that, they would have never been in the know, that he was Anjali Bitiyaa's husband, if Bitiyaa had not invited Titliyaa for the Satyanarayan Pooja in his house. With the grace of God, she saw him there on the terrace. Arnav recalled that day, Khushi had walked into his room in a daze, not knowing where she was, with her eyes brimming with tears. It must have been after confronting that scumbag on the terrace. When she had knocked in to him unknowingly, she had sobbed her heart out with stream of tears descending like a broken necklace of pearls and he had felt that something had gone awry. The betrayal of family's trust in Shyam, the knowledge that Di's marriage was balancing on fragile glass, the unpalatable truth that Shyam had turned her into 'the other woman' in his marriage, must have broken her. She who had held marriage and all the things associated with it, with honor and respect, was being made by Shyam to go against her innate being, engaging himself in polygamy, thereby making her an accomplice in his crime. She along with the others, were made to see things that had lulled them to a false sense of security, which were nothing but magical illusion. Arnav wished if only he had known then, if only she had told him. The very next moment the query that arose in his mind, would he have believed her, answered it. Arnav had no more illusions about ASR. He knew having such firm faith in Shyam then, he would have accused her instead. With his thoughts on Khushi being always bordering on suspicion, in order to cover up for his attraction, he would have accused her of all vile things, though he would have never meant it in reality. But words, are like pearls, once broken cannot be repaired. His illusory ways had been responsible for her not to confide in him.

Buaji told him with relish that her Titliyaa had thrown his ring at his face and had delivered a well-timed five finger salute across the face, an action which she wished, she was a witness to and she too would have joined the fray to give him a hiding of his life with her rolling pin, one that would have been never forgotten in his lifetime. Amma continuing the narration, wiping the tears streaming down her face, told Arnav that Shyam had come over after the pooja and they had thrown him out. He had held breaking of Payaliyaa's wedding as a sword on their heads, if they spilled the beans. Buaji took up the narration saying, undeterred, they had sent Khussi to RM to tell Anjali Bitiyaa the truth about her husband. Seeing Anjali Bitiyaa agitated over broken mangalsutra she could not do so however much she tried. Later,on Payaliyaa's wedding day' Buaji petered off and Amma continued, lamenting that, hearing Anjali Bitiyaa was carrying, they had thought he would have mended his ways and become a better man. On hind sight they realized that he was like an apparition and whatever he had shown them was not really there.

Buaji told him that, they should not have hidden but disclosed it to him sooner, but how could they destroy the happiness in his family with what they knew, if Shyam had mended his ways? Would he have believed them, if told what sort of a dirtball his brother-in-law was? Arnav nodded indicating that he understood. Amma once again with bitter regret and a heavy heart said that, had they told all this may be he would not have dared to kidnap, and if anything had happened to him, Arnav Babua,' They just could not fathom the folly of their silence then! Buaji too nodded sighing heavily.

Arnav giving a gentle smile assured them that, he was fine and their Titliyaa was the one who saved him. Amma, Buaji and Babuji looked at Khushi with appreciation in their moist eyes, while Khushi had her eyes downcast. Arnav assured them once again over his Di's state saying that, she too would be fine but would need time to reconcile to facts and moreover having her baby would help her to pull through. All agreed with his statement. As they sat around the table, talking Arnav relished the feeling of being part of the family and basked in the love, warmth and concern shown by these simple people for whom relation and people were of utmost importance than money. The wealth they measured in others, were in terms of human relationship, love and goodness in heart and not the status, money or luxuries one could have. These qualities were all in complete contrast to all the things he had time and again accused Khushi off. It was Shyam, who was the epitome of all the things he had thought Khushi to be, a golddigger, a liar, a manipulator, a betrayer, a backstabber, a conspirator and an opportunist. He had been hallucinating about those things to be in Khushi, though they appeared to be so to him at that time, none of them were true.

Buaji bustled off to kitchen, saying that he must stay back for lunch as it was Sanka Devi's birthday. Arnav was stunned to hear it and when he managed to voice out that she never uttered a word about it, she shrugged it off saying, it was not of that importance. But he refuted saying that, it was important and wished her with a heart-felt, Happy Birthday, Khushi. May you have all the happiness in the world today and every day of your life, for which Khushi thanked him like an echo, where things can be perceived, but there is nothing there, either inside or outside.

Arnav rubbed his forehead to ease out the pain, but worse than that was, he being unaware of Khushi's birthday. That was not acceptable! He had not even purchased a gift! That was all the more unacceptable to him! Seeing him squeezing his forehead, Amma thought that his head ache had persisted and told him that, Khussi would give him a head massage, making both Arnav and Khushi stare back in shock! Khushi's mind screamed a No! Buaji called out proudly that, her hands have a magical effect! After all Titliyaa was her niece! Amma giving her the bottle asked her to massage with the oil like she does for them and make Babua's head ache vanish. Khushi's aside, Hey Devi Maiyya! If only I could vanish! made Arnav smile. She realized her position is similar to that of a reflection. Things appear but have no reality of their own. When Amma asked whether she said anything, Khushi just shook her head and wondered, what was the use of protesting? Her life was doomed! Her family was worried about Arnav Babua's headache while her own personal headache was Arnav Babua himself and he was sitting pretty by her waiting for his massage! Arnav who was waiting to feel her touch, asked for the massage hoping that she would comply and he would get the pleasure of her touching him even if it was just a head massage. Khushi sat where she was, looking at the bottle of oil in her hand and her contract husband. Her cheeky thought was, what bliss it would be to fry him in it. Though calm outward, boiling inside, her images of frying him, though delusive, was satisfying!

"Don't believe everything you think. Thoughts are just that - thoughts"

~ Allan Lokos, Pocket Peace: Effective Practices for Enlightened Living

Arnav is realizing that Khushi is fast turning out to be like a mirage, knows he has to woo her with great care. He also knew that if he slackens his pursuit he would end up with a reflection, things appear, but have no reality of their own and she would just end up by becoming an illusion for him.

Khushi knowing that Arnav will woo her is placing a stone on her heart lest she exposes it to another hurt, thinking that the love, trust and faith of Arnav was like the city of Gandharvas for her, where there was neither a dwelling nor anyone to dwell.

For the residents of Gupta House, the episode of Shyam in their life was like a magic illusion where things are made to appear due to the temporary coming together of causes and conditions. One that they would like to put behind, if possible succumb to Amnesia.

For Shyam it was like a dream, objects perceived with the five senses are not there, but they appear through delusion. He had deluded himself of having the cake and eating it too. All he got in the end was the boot.

"Because an illusion is an illusion. Reality always exists despite the facade"

~ Kasie West, Pivot Point

That is why this is titled WILL-O-WISP.

That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.